Murder by Serpents (Five Star First Edition Mystery)

by Graham, Barbara

  Tony knew he couldn’t continue to watch the mayor without either strangling the man or laughing in his face. Caged between his desk and a row of four drawer file cabinets, he shifted his eyes to the wall quilt that hung behind the mayor’s oversized head. As a tribute to his desire to write Wild West adventure books, Theo had used fabrics with cowboy motifs to make the colorful decoration and had given it to him on his last birthday.

  A shrill ringing came from somewhere on his desk. Blessing the interruption, Tony shuffled stacks of papers as he searched for the telephone. Undeterred, the mayor continued to babble. At last, Tony located the missing object and pressed the receiver to his ear. “Sheriff.”

  A blast of high-pitched sound poured from the receiver and ripped into his brain, threatening to exit through his eyes. Tony immediately recognized the source—Blossom Flowers was in another flying purple panic. He sighed.

  “Slow down, Blossom.” He moved the receiver away from his throbbing ear. Not certain of everything she had said, Tony was sure that he had picked out the words “dead” and “snake,” but the torrent of words, accompanied by the whooshing sounds of panting, was otherwise unintelligible. He sighed again, unconcerned. Blossom had at least one emergency a week. It hadn’t been long since she had called, hysterical, because her dog was lost. The mutt had eventually been located under her bed, sound asleep. Tony felt another sigh working its way up toward the surface. He forced it down. “Take a deep breath and tell me again what you saw in the parking lot at Ruby’s Café. Where are you now?”

  Rising from the chair that faced Tony’s desk, Mayor Cashdollar balanced his bony frame on his size sixteen feet. Tony noticed that his black suit pants ended a good two inches above his shoes and exposed skinny ankles in white socks.

  “We’ll talk later, Sheriff.” Clutching a steno pad and a yellow pencil in one huge hand, he tiptoed toward the door.

  Watching Calvin in motion, Tony couldn’t suppress his grin.

  His fellow citizens had elected a walking cartoon character and put him in the mayor’s office.

  As Calvin crossed the threshold, he paused, turned, and gave Tony a childish wave goodbye.

  Turning his full attention to what Blossom was saying, Tony didn’t return the wave. She switched from panting to emitting a bone-piercing screech. He feared the sound would make his skull explode. In self-defense, he interrupted her. “I’ll be right over.”

  Massaging his ear, he checked his watch. It was only nine o’clock in the morning and he already wanted to go home. Dealing with the mayor and Blossom in one week was enough to increase his perpetual heartburn. He thought that dealing with both of them before noon might just kill him. His stomach rumbled and he reached for the king-size jar of antacid tablets that was the centerpiece on his desk.

  He was still chewing several tablets as he pulled his brown nylon jacket from its hook by the door. He dialed Wade Claybough’s cell phone. As usual, his eager-beaver chief deputy answered on the first ring.

  Tony spoke without preamble. “Meet me at Ruby’s Cafe´. I’m not sure what’s happened, but Blossom was shrieking into the phone like a banshee on speed. You know how she gets, but I’d say that whatever is in the lot behind Ruby’s must be pretty ugly. I’m sure I heard about something dead and snakes.” He pulled on his jacket before opening his private door into the parking lot. “I’m leaving now.”

  Tony drove his official green and white Blazer around the side of Ruby’s and noticed a few onlookers milling around the café end of the upper parking lot. In spite of the mist, he could make out the form of a dark green car at the far end. It blended into the kudzu-choked hillside.

  In the center of the lot stood what looked like an orange haired manatee wearing a yellow slicker. It gestured at the small gathering with a blue and white golf umbrella, while it talked on a cell phone. As he got closer, it became clear that this was not a manatee but an exceptionally large woman with tufts of traffic-cone orange hair. Tony felt himself smile. This was classic Blossom, the youngest of the myriad Flowers sisters. Whatever else might be said about her, the word timid was never mentioned.

  From what he could tell, Blossom was doing her best to protect the area from sightseers even though she created a fearful scene in the process. Tony pressed on the horn. At first, that had no obvious effect on the gathering. Just as he was about to flip on the siren, the people moved aside and let him pull forward, where he stopped, blocking the entrance into the upper lot.

  Seconds later, Wade pulled his patrol car to a stop next to the Blazer.

  Spotting his arrival, Blossom flipped her cell phone closed and, with a flourish, dropped it into the green tote bag dangling from her elbow. She jogged her way toward the car and, considering her bulk, moved quite briskly.

  Tony climbed out of the Blazer and opened the passenger door so that she could sit. As she climbed in, her tote bag slammed into his knee. He glanced down at fifty neon green frogs with brilliant red eyes. They all smiled at him.

  While he waited for Blossom to get settled, he studied the car. From where he stood, it looked like an ordinary, small, dark green station wagon. Beads of water covered the car, but the pavement under it looked dry.

  It had started drizzling very early that morning and now the falling moisture was more than mist and not quite rain. The whole world seemed to be dripping as Tony lifted his face and sniffed. The air smelled like the damp earth of early spring, more promise than fact, and it was chilly enough that he welcomed the warmth of his nylon jacket with “Sheriff” emblazoned on the back. It usually made him feel like a target, but it came with the job.

  “I’m going to take a look, Blossom. You just sit here and try to relax.” With a gesture of his hand, he signaled for Wade to stay behind.

  Some sixth sense, or maybe Blossom’s frantic call, made him walk carefully. He looked for anything out of place but saw nothing. However, as he approached the car, he felt heat coming from it like it had been baked in an oven. It literally dripped with sweat. Fat droplets ran down the sides and splashed onto the pavement like rain.

  Tony couldn’t see through the driver’s window.

  Condensation both inside and outside, combined with tinted glass, completely obscured the interior. He glanced back at Blossom, wondering how she had been able to make out anything.

  “You got to look in the windshield. Over there.” Blossom’s strident voice carried through the thick air and a chubby finger indicated the passenger side.

  Tony followed her directions. At first, all he could see was a shapeless form. From this angle, there appeared to be dark blotches on the inside of the windshield, like something sticky had been thrown against it. He blinked again and a cluster of water drops slipped down the glass and revealed what appeared to be a human form and, seen quite clearly, the brown and black geometric markings on a fair-sized rattlesnake. Coiled, rattles held high, it sat on the person’s lap. The rattles vibrated, making its warning clear. Cold, dark eyes stared into Tony’s and made him flinch. Was it guarding the car?

  Tony peered through the driver’s window again and tapped on the glass, searching for signs of movement, of human life. Only the snake moved. Tony pulled the flashlight from his duty belt. Shining it into the car, he was able to see that the body looked like that of a man dressed in a short-sleeved shirt. Mouth open, eyes staring, his head rested against the driver’s door window, and the only visible foot was on the passenger seat.

  Still crouched near the window, Tony pulled on a pair of purple, latex-free gloves and reached for the door handle. Seeing his movement, the snake countered with a lightning quick strike at the glass that separated them. With his eyes a quarter of an inch away from the interior of the open mouth, Tony got a chilling look at the fangs gleaming pink in the subdued light.

  “Damn!” He jerked upright, his heart pounded in his chest and his guts tightened. His movement, or maybe the snake’s, caused a reaction inside the car and a second snake writhed into view. As it twisted arou
nd its companion, Tony recognized the reddish brown and cream bands of a copperhead.

  Snakes made his skin crawl. He considered what he had seen. Two types of poisonous snakes loose in one car? What were the odds of that happening by accident? He knew the answer. Slim and none.

  Tony stepped back and surveyed the area around the car. Within seconds he decided there was no way those snakes had gotten into the car without a lot of help. Equally obvious, there was no way that he could shoot them without shooting the man.

  “What’s in there?” asked Wade. He stood a bit behind Tony and below him in the parking lot of the Thomas Brothers’s garage. Curiosity burned in his dark eyes.

  “There’s definitely a person in here. Looks like only one and he can’t be alive, but I have to make sure.” Tony didn’t mention the snakes but searched the area for a forked stick to use to keep them away while he checked for a pulse. He considered having Wade come help but discarded the idea. It would probably be safer for him to do this alone. Getting shot by his deputy while they were both snake-dancing around the parked car would not improve his deteriorating mood.

  “I want you to get Doc Nash and an ambulance. Then get someone to help tape off this whole area and start taking your photos.” His gesture covered a large part of the parking lot. “There’s something damned suspicious about this whole setup.”

  Nodding, but clearly curious, Wade turned to go.

  “Wait.”

  The young deputy pivoted. A hopeful expression crossed his face.

  “Look up the number for the snake guy and give him a call first. We’ll need him before we need the doc.” Tony knew that no one assigned to animal control would handle snakes, and he didn’t blame them. It would take all of his nerve just to open the car door wide enough to check for a pulse. Dodging snakes while removing the body was out of the question.

  Wade backed up a step. “The snake guy?”

  Tony could see the color leach out of Wade’s handsome face as he stared at the car. The high cheekbones seemed sharper than usual and against the sudden pallor, his thick hair looker even blacker. “Yeah, you know, Stan-the-Snakeman.”

  “There’s a snake in there?” There was a definite quaver in Wade’s voice.

  Tony grinned. With the door closed, he managed to seem unconcerned. “Yep. At least two of them. Tell Stan that I saw a rattlesnake and a copperhead.” He turned his attention back to the car. There were shapes in the back that looked like cages but he couldn’t see them well enough to know if they were occupied. Reluctant to disturb the snakes, he knew that his first priority was to check the body for signs of life. He pulled the handle. It was unlocked.

  He hadn’t found a stick so he opened the door just wide enough to slip his right hand inside. A wave of scorching, fetid air hit him, surprising him, and he gagged. It smelled of blood, vomit and excrement. As he touched the neck, he held his breath. It only took a moment to verify what he already knew. The man was dead.

  A warning rattle sounded in his right ear. He threw himself clear of the car at the same time that he slammed the door shut. Standing with his hands braced against his thighs, he gulped in deep breaths of cool, clean air and concentrated on the car.

  The exterior seemed to be in good shape. There were a few minor scratches near the back passenger door that might have been fresh. The tires were new. He didn’t remember seeing the car around town, but it bore a Tennessee plate.

  In fact, the plate had Park County emblazoned right in the center. Since Park County was so tiny that it all but vanished on the map and the town contracted his department to supply law enforcement, Tony guessed that he’d seen every vehicle. There were lots of pickup trucks but probably only about a thousand licensed automobiles, so it surprised him that the car was unfamiliar to him. Until they could get inside it, he didn’t see much more for him do here for the moment.

  He jotted down the license plate number and made his way back to Blossom. She still sat in his car with the door open. As usual, her expression was as adoring as a spaniel’s. Her fingers toyed with her watch. It looked like the band cut into her flesh but she seemed not to notice.

  “I told you it was ugly.”

  “Yes, you did and you were right.” Tony braced a hand on the Blazer’s roof and looked around. The rain had stopped and the small knot of onlookers had grown. It looked like half of the county was there, standing in groups behind the line of yellow tape.

  His eyes returned to Blossom. Her sparse but vivid hair stuck out in all directions, but her cheeks were rosy and her skin didn’t look as pasty as usual. She appeared excited but not frightened as she reached into the frog-festooned bag and pulled out a king-size Snickers bar, peeled down part of the wrapper and took a dainty bite, leaving a touch of chocolate clinging to one corner of her mouth.

  “What made you look inside? Do you know who drives that car?” said Tony.

  Her head moved from side to side. “I was on my way to work.” Suddenly she slammed a hand over her mouth. The force of the blow jiggled her chins, loosening a crumb. “Oh, no! I’m so late now that I just know I am going to lose another job.” She wailed like a baby. Tears welled in her bulbous eyes and overflowed, cascading down her cheeks before splashing on her bright pink T-shirt.

  He patted her soft shoulder and thought that it felt like fluffing a down pillow. “I’ll vouch for you, Blossom. If you get into any trouble at work, I’ll just tell your boss that you were helping me with my investigation.” Tony kept his tone gentle. “Where are you working these days?”

  Her sobbing stopped in mid-breath as if a switch had been thrown. Tears balanced on her stubby eyelashes even as she began to giggle. She sounded girlish and surprisingly musical. “I work at Ruby’s. Didn’t you know that?”

  Tony lifted his eyes and looked at the back door of the café. Breakfast smells still floated in the damp air. He took a deep breath and could identify the aromas of sausage, bacon grease and biscuits. His stomach growled. “I’ve never seen you in there.”

  “I come in and make the desserts.” Another sweet giggle escaped. “That warm apple pie with the special crumb topping is one of my granny’s best recipes. Miss Ruby told me that it is one of your favorites.” Coquettishly, she batted her eyes.

  At the mention of that delectable dessert, his stomach growled again, this time with more force. That pie tasted like a little slice of heaven.

  “It’s wonderful.” Tony agreed. His mouth watered just thinking about it. “What else do you cook?”

  “I bake all the pies and the cakes for Miss Ruby. Sometimes she has me make bread or rice pudding and even, sometimes, gingerbread.” She sighed loudly and fanned herself with her little hands. Ringless, the fingers were thick and soft. Pasty white, they resembled marshmallows stuck together. “At least today’s Thursday and not Tuesday. I’d never get it all done if I was this late getting started.”

  Tony’s eyebrows pulled together. “Why is that? What is so different about Tuesday?”

  An amused expression brightened her plain face. “Tuesdays, that diet group meets over at the Baptist church and then they all come over here for dessert, so I have to bake twice as much on Tuesdays. I don’t know why they don’t just skip that boring old meetin’ and just come on and eat. That’s all they are interested in anyways. Mostly something chocolate. Didja know that your Aunt Martha is one of the regulars?”

  Tony grinned at that bit of news, knowing that eventually he’d use it. “Maybe it’s their reward for good behavior. I’m sure that Ruby will understand why you are late and I’ll vouch for you if it’s needed.” The look of adoration on her face made him take a step back. At last, she seemed calm enough to question. “Just tell me what you saw this morning.”

  Just then, Ruby stepped out the back door and looked around, a look of concern distorting her beautiful face. When she saw Blossom and Tony, she waved. “Is everything okay?” The petite brunette approached. “I was in my office doing paperwork when one of my customers came in and
told me that Blossom had been attacked or something. He didn’t seem too certain about anything.” Her dark eyes searched their faces but she seemed to relax when she saw their expressions. After a quick glance at the half-eaten candy bar, her smile widened as if seeing it reassured her that Blossom was just fine.

  “Morning, Ruby.” Tony turned to face her. “I just need to ask Blossom a few more questions and then she’ll be ready to go to work. She seems to be worried that you’ll fire her for being late.”

  He watched as Ruby’s eyes widened. His words clearly surprised her. Many of the locals referred to her as Little Ruby. Old Ruby had been the previous proprietor. The name went along with the business. This particular Ruby was officially Maria Costello, a Mediterranean rose blooming in this Scotch-Irish garden. Even with her hair tightly corralled into a chignon and wrapped in a sparkling white apron that covered her almost to her toes, her beauty haunted many masculine dreams. Tony knew that Deputy Mike Ott was in love with her.