Expecting Darkness

by Mandy M. Roth

  “You still don’t approve of me dating him, do you?” asked Meena.

  “No, but that hasn’t stopped you. I have a lot of guilt for being the reason you met him,” confessed Jessie. “If I wouldn’t have needed to drop off a paper to him, the two of you wouldn’t have met.”

  “He’s good to me. He makes me smile, and he says he loves me.”

  Jessie cringed. “Meena, I can’t explain it. But I really don’t think he’s the guy for you.”

  “But I like him. It would mean a lot if you tried to like him too,” said Meena.

  “I know. Trust me. I know,” she said, taking a drink of her latte. She’d almost gone with tea, as Meena had, because her stomach had been touchy as of late, but her coffee addiction knew no bounds and wouldn’t be stopped.

  Meena pushed her long dark hair back from her face. “So, while we’re on the subject of my boyfriend, Rudy asked me something really weird the other night.”

  Jessie tensed, unsure she wanted to hear. She didn’t have the heart to tell her friend that her nightmares had something to do with Rudy. While she only remembered bits and pieces when she woke, the ones she did were of Rudy coming at her with syringes of something, telling someone to hold her down. And the other images she remembered from her dreams were of Rudy’s teaching assistant—Tyler. He struck fear in her.

  Even without the dreams and the off feeling she’d always had around Rudy, Jessie wasn’t a fan of her friend dating a professor at their university. It had less to do with the age difference and him being a teacher there than the fact there was something about Professor Rudy that she couldn’t put her finger on. Whatever it was, it made Jessie leery of him, but her concerns had fallen on deaf ears. Meena was shy and didn’t open up to many people. The fact she was dating at all was a big step.

  Meena eyed her and sighed. “I know you don’t approve.”

  “He’s fine,” said Jessie, sipping her latte. “What did he ask you?”

  “It was about—” Meena leaned in and lowered her voice, “—sex.”

  All ears, Jessie moved her chair closer to Meena. “You’re not seriously going to have sex with him, are you? I thought you were saving yourself for marriage.” They’d been friends a long time, despite their families having longstanding feuds that dated back to historic Scotland days. Of course, when immortal males who were present for the original battles were still around, it tended to mean old feelings died hard.

  Meena’s grandfather had been head of his own clan of Highlanders back in the day and still was, though now he was a vampire, as were most of his men. The same was true of Jessie’s father. Both men were master vampires now and both hardheaded Scots. But they knew better than to try to come between the girls and their friendship. Even immortals feared something, and apparently master vampires were afraid of tears from their daughters or granddaughters.

  Suckers.

  “I do want to save myself for marriage, but Rudy keeps pushing for sex,” she said, her voice still low.

  “He’s a shifter,” said Jessie, hoping her babysitters were still too preoccupied with hot chicks to listen to their conversation. “He could hurt you without meaning to.”

  Meena grunted. “I’m regretting blurting out wolf in front of you when you turned in that paper to him and I first met him. You’d have never figured out he was a shifter if I hadn’t.”

  Jessie simply stared at her friend, letting her vent.

  Meena blushed. “He wants to have sex and thinks if I chain him we could maybe do it without any risk to me.”

  Jessie flung back in her chair, her eyes wide. “What? Are you kidding me?”

  Meena shook her head.

  “You’re a virgin and he wants to bring in whips and chains for your first time? Run away, Meena. Run far and fast.”

  Meena huffed. “You’re a virgin too.”

  “And I’m not talking about chaining a guy to do him, am I?”

  “No,” Meena returned with a sigh.

  “If you’re not ready, tell him.”

  “Rose is sexually active,” Meena said, as if that meant she should be too.

  Jessie groaned. “Your sister talks a big game, but I’m betting most of that is for show. I don’t think she does half of what she claims she does with men. I think she just likes to push your buttons. I’m an only child, but that seems like classic little sister behavior.”

  Meena nodded. “You’re probably right. And then there are the whole funky feelings I’ve developed for a certain someone.”

  Smiling, Jessie crossed one leg over the other. “Is this certain someone your grandfather’s second?”

  Meena blushed. “I can’t help it. Bhaltair is so yummy to look at.”

  Jessie agreed. She’d seen the man more than once. He was Meena’s grandfather’s second-in-command, and he didn’t lack in the least in the way of sex appeal. “Go for that one. I approve of him.”

  Meena gasped. “I could never. Besides, he sees me as too human.”

  Jessie flinched for her friend, understanding all too well the pain of feeling less than extraordinary in a sea full of immortal bad-asses. She also knew what had happened during a training session between Bhaltair and Meena. “I get it.”

  “I know,” confessed Meena. “It’s why I talk to you about it, but no one else. Rose has slayer-like skills, and she doesn’t break at the slightest touch. I do. Bhaltair still hasn’t trained me since the accident. I told him it wasn’t his fault. I know he didn’t mean to hurt me. I feel like all he does is avoid me now.”

  She patted her friend’s hand. “Hey, at least your dad and grandfather let you train. Mine refuses to allow me around anything to do with violence. I’m pretty sure he’d put me in a giant bubble if he could. It’s certainly been all he could handle letting me live close to campus—a whole forty-five minutes from him. Not to mention he’s now in Scotland, and I’m here—with babysitters.”

  Meena laughed. “Oh, for sure. Cormag cannot handle the idea of you growing up. Will Islay be around tonight again?”

  At the mention of Islay, Jessie groaned. “I told him to stay away, that I’m fine, but he ignores me. I saw him last night, outside, near the tree by the edge of the condo property. He just stands there watching my place, as if he’s afraid bad guys will attack at any minute.”

  A shiver ran up Jessie’s spine as she thought back to the night she’d gone to dinner with Islay. She’d accepted an invite from Islay for dinner and a movie, but she couldn’t remember ever making it to the movie, despite Islay telling her they had. Unease settled in her gut as she tried to focus on that night.

  Meena snickered and sipped her tea, drawing Jessie from her thoughts. “At least he’s good looking. Tall, blond, very attractive, and powerful.”

  “You want me to ask him out for you?” teased Jessie, the pull in her gut getting worse. “Oh, wait. We both know you prefer your guys with dark hair.”

  Meena lifted a brow. “And you don’t? Tell me about your dad’s ex-second. What’s his name again?”

  Meena knew the man’s name. She just wanted to hear Jessie say it. Typically, Jessie blushed when she did.

  “Searc.” A blush stole her cheeks.

  “Right.” Meena laughed.

  Jessie tossed a sugar packet at Meena. “Dork. Stop making it out like I have a crush on him. I don’t.”

  Okay, she did, but still.

  “Really? Could have fooled me. You talk about him enough whenever the subject of hot men comes up,” reminded Meena.

  Jessie lifted her latte. “Sue me. He’s super hot.”

  He was around six and a half feet tall, with long dark hair, a scruffy beard, a honed body, tanned skin, and the ability to stand up to her father with ease. Something not many ever did. It didn’t hurt that he was funny either. She had always liked men who could make her laugh.

  Meena’s cell pinged and she lifted it, reading the screen. “Rose wants to know if we want to go out drinking with her tonight.”

  �
��She’s not twenty-one yet,” said Jessie, forgetting for a moment who she was talking about. Rose was a wildcat and more than likely had a fake ID. Probably more than one.

  “When has that ever stopped my sister?” asked Meena, shaking her head. “She’s just trying to act out because she’s got training this weekend with Bhaltair. I was planning to go and maybe read while they worked out. Then I had to pick up a dress I had made, and a book I ordered might come in to the library.”

  “The dress I went with you to Carol’s to have fitted is done?” asked Jessie. The girls both used the dressmaker. She tended to make them things they couldn’t find on store shelves.

  Meena smiled. “I’m going to wear it on a date with Rudy.”

  Stifling a groan, Jessie eyed her friend. “And just like that, I’m hoping you go drinking with Rose tonight and not on a date with Rudy.”

  Meena laughed. “You know, you and Rose look like you could be sisters way more than she and I do. You’ve got the same long red hair. Though you lack her wild streak.”

  “Good thing. The world could not handle two of her in it.” Jessie grinned.

  Meena shifted in her seat slightly to avoid the sun as it moved. They’d been fine this early in the morning, but as the day wore on, they’d likely burn.

  “Agree.” Meena texted Rose back and then set her phone on the table. “I told her I have to study and that you’re going to spend the night binge-watching something on the Internet. It’s so your speed.”

  It was. Jessie was far from wild.

  “You know, you could call Searc,” said Meena, grinning.

  “I’ll call him and ask him out if you call Bhaltair and do the same.” Searc had once been her father’s second, but they’d had a falling-out of sorts nearly a hundred years back. That didn’t change the fact that Cormag had sired Searc, so there was a maker bond in place, as well as mutual respect for one another.

  “Never mind,” said Meena.

  “That is what I thought.” Jessie touched her coffee cup lightly. “Drop Rudy and go for Bhaltair; my gut says Rudy is no good for you.”

  “You know, all his other students seem to adore him, but not you,” Meena mused. “And the way you act when his teaching assistant is around…I swear, Jessie, you act like Tyler is a serial killer or something.”

  “I do not,” she said, cold skating up her arms at the very mention of Tyler. She had to shake thoughts of her nightmares from her head to even be able to speak. “Okay, maybe I do. He doesn’t give you the creeps?”

  “No. He seems nice enough to me and he is totally into you,” added Meena. “He’s mentioned you to Rudy enough that Rudy even asked about possibly double dating.”

  “Oh, don’t make me part of your breaking the rules and seeing a professor.” Jessie drank more of her latte. “That is all you, babes. And no way am I dating Tyler.”

  Meena snorted. “Okay, but go easy on him. He seems sweet enough.”

  There was something off about him. He had the same implacable characteristic that Rudy had—the one that set her on edge around him. Not to mention she kept seeing him in her dreams. And what she remembered of the dreams didn’t paint Tyler in a good light at all.

  “Jessie, you’re making that face again. The one that says you don’t trust Tyler and Rudy.”

  “I don’t.” Her cell rang, and she glanced at the screen. “It’s my dad.”

  “Shouldn’t he be sleeping this time of day?” asked Meena.

  Nodding, Jessie answered. “Daddy?”

  “Lass, am I catching you at a bad time?” he asked, his Scottish brogue evident.

  “Not at all. I’m having coffee with Meena, but I’m guessing your henchmen already told you as much.” She waved at the Para-Regs who were looking in her direction again.

  They waved back.

  She flipped them off, and they laughed.

  Erik licked his lips and nodded.

  Meena snorted. “Oh, look, he’s taking you up on your offer.”

  Jessie’s eyes widened and she nearly yelped.

  Her father mumbled, “Och, lass, do nae take that tone with me. I want you safe.”

  She sighed. “I know.”

  “Can you find some free time tonight?” he asked.

  “Please don’t tell me I have to go to dinner with Islay again,” she said before thinking better of it.

  “No. I was thinking you could meet me for dinner at the main house.”

  She paused. “Wait. You’re home?”

  “I will be by sunset,” he said. “And I’ve missed you. Take pity on yer old father and come see me.”

  She smiled. “I’ll be there, Daddy. Just give me a few hours.”

  Chapter Three

  Jessie stood in the doorway to her father’s huge home office. The main house had been built in a way that felt like it was a castle plunked down in America. The grounds were expansive, and the nearest neighbor was quite a walk away. It was how it had to be with who and what her father was. A number of his men lived on the grounds, some within the main home.

  They truly were a den of vampires, staying close.

  Her hand went again to her abdomen. His office was certainly decorated for a manly man. It seemed that everything was a deep-colored wood, oversized, and looked like it could appear on the front of a hunting magazine. She grimaced at the sight of the mounted animal heads on the walls. She’d always hated them. Her father never quite understood why.

  Men.

  She didn’t mind the swords and daggers that were mounted around the room or any of the other old weaponry. There was a large tartan framed with a family crest to one side on the wall. And to the other was a framed, hand-painted family tree. There was only one recent addition—her. The rest had been there for centuries.

  She smiled at the sight of the other Scottish relics that adorned the walls. Her father was proud of his heritage and his past. He’d been present for most of the battles he had keepsakes from. She didn’t know his exact age but suspected he was over three hundred years old, though he didn’t look much over thirty. When she was younger, she was surrounded only by immortals, never understanding that other kids had parents and family friends who aged. It wasn’t until she talked her father into allowing her to attend school with human children that she learned the differences.

  Turns out, not everyone’s father has an allergy to the sun and requires O-neg to survive. They weren’t all vampires. And as a master vampire, he was the guy in charge. No one questioned him. Well, no one but Jessie, and Searc if he was around. She was always questioning her father, always wanting to know more about everything.

  He didn’t like sharing too much about his past with her, but she’d discovered it her own way. One she had yet to confess the truth of to him. He wouldn’t be pleased to know she’d dug through the seemingly endless trunks of archives in the attic. Each contained a treasure of historical facts and information. Things that she couldn’t find in normal books. And when she’d wanted more information she’d gotten it from the university’s library. The school she went to wasn’t just any old school. It, like many, was affiliated with PSI. The organization had a good-sized foothold at her university and she strongly suspected that was why she’d been permitted to not only attend but live just off campus as well.

  Her father’s overprotectiveness knew no bounds. She couldn’t fault him for loving her. But she did often wish he’d loosen his grip, and permit her to live her life. Sure, she’d no doubt make mistakes, but she’d learn and grow from them. It was the natural road to being an adult and at twenty-three, almost twenty-four, she’d not been allowed to do much in the way of decision making on her own, thanks to her father.

  She smiled as she looked behind his desk to a painting that he’d had done of the two of them together when she was younger. She was maybe three and sitting on his lap, her head against his chest. He looked proud and protective. An expression he still wore around her to this day.

  To her father, she was still a little
girl.

  He’d be upset that she hadn’t texted ahead of time to let him know she was driving in. And she’d not permitted the guardhouse to phone up to the main house to let him know she was there. She’d wanted to surprise him. When she’d texted before heading toward home, she’d told him she’d be a few hours yet and would check in before she left, so he wasn’t planning on her.

  “Islay, I do nae want to discuss this further with her,” her father snapped, his voice booming from down the hall as he headed in the direction of his office. From his spot, he couldn’t see her and she couldn’t see him yet as he was around a corner still.

  She found herself tensing at the mention of Islay. She’d done her best to avoid him since their dinner several months back. Prior to that, she’d gone out with him almost weekly and spent a great deal of time around him. She’d thought of him as an uncle or a brother of sorts, but he’d been tied to her nightmares as well lately. Since she’d come to missing days and suffering from nightmares, she’d only spoken with him once about the incident and that had been on the phone. He’d been the one to tell her she’d had too much to drink during their dinner, that the movie had been a disaster, and that he’d taken her home and bid his farewell at the door.

  There was no reason not to believe him, as he’d been a trusted part of her life since before she could remember. But something was off. His words on the phone had twisted at her gut, her mind yelling “liar” the entire time he calmly explained things to her. And when he’d gone so far as to point out how run-down she’d permitted herself to get while studying, it had taken everything in her to keep from shouting at him and calling Searc at once.

  Even now, with her father close, and all seemingly right in her world, Jessie wanted Searc near her. Wanted him nearby to calm her fears—fears that made no sense to her. It was just Islay, her father’s most trusted vampire, and a man she’d thought of as family all her life. And why did she keep thinking of Searc? It wasn’t as if she was close to him. They barely spoke to one another.