Pirates of Saturn (The Saturn Series Book 2)

by C. Chase Harwood

  Jennifer looked at him with a question mark.

  Almost turning to look at her, he said, “My uncle got off a shot as they flew away, but he missed. I shot the tree above my head in the excitement.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Last time I hunted something. I’ll never forget the look of disgust on his face. Old fart never took me back out.”

  “Oookayyy. So once you drove through some corn to stop a car and another time you shot a tree. What does shooting the tree tell us about our current circumstance?”

  “Nothing. Just that tracking things hasn’t worked out for me as… Never mind.”

  Jennifer looked at him for several seconds, daring him to continue.

  He said, “Really. Nothing. Long story.”

  “OK,” she said skeptically. “Anyway, don’t see a lot of asteroids during our travels. This one seems to be headed right at us.” She zoomed in on the dot. “That’s one of the rounder rocks I’ve seen. And what’s that?” She pointed to a dark line that seemed to bisect the rolling rock.

  Caleb said, “Looks too straight to be natural. My heads-up won’t zoom any closer than that. Let’s not change course for now.”

  Jennifer called over her shoulder, “Hee Sook, can we get your eyes on this?”

  Caleb said, “Really? What’s the bot gonna tell us that Diamond won’t?”

  Hee Sook floated in the cockpit door. “Yes, Jennifer?”

  Jennifer pointed at the screen. “Take a look at that asteroid and tell us what you think.”

  Hee Sook was used to humans asking her what she thought about all sorts of things. She was expected to answer an infinite number of mundane questions. This seemed like a request for an actual opinion. She’d never been asked her opinion regarding something that required deep analysis. Her experience was more in the vein of, How do these flowers look here? How many grains of sand do you suppose are on Jones Beach?

  Like all humanoid robots, the HeeS4 Domestic Assistant was equipped with a powerful array of observational tools. Her image processors could of course make sense of the standard human visual spectrum, but she also saw in infrared, ultraviolet, and could detect gamma and x-rays. Her original knowledge base was limited to what was necessary for domestic tasks and upgraded for space travel. Since becoming sentient, she had absorbed as much as she could from every computer she interfaced with—including The Diamond Girl, just short of its shielded files. Hee Sook took in all the data available regarding the asteroid and came to a quick conclusion. She nevertheless waited for a brief moment to give her answer the weight she calculated the situation required. “The line that perfectly bisects what appears to be an uncommonly round but otherwise typical asteroid, can only be man-made. Given the fact that the direction of rotation aligns with the line itself, I conclude that it is one element of a mechanical operation. Like many of the smaller moons around Saturn and Jupiter which utilize the Corey Effect for gravitational mimicry, I…think I can safely say that it is for that purpose.”

  Caleb glanced at the bot and said sarcastically, “Sure about all that?”

  Hee Sook missed the sarcasm. "Within a level of certainty of ninety-nine-point-eight-six percent."

  “Sorry I asked.”

  Jennifer said, “If our friends are there, it looks like far more than we can handle. We should call the police.”

  Caleb sighed with exasperation. “By the time a single patrol ship gets here—cuz that’s all anybody’s gonna send—our friends might be dead or worse.” He waved at the dashboard. “What can a single patrol ship do that we can’t?”

  “Uh, call other patrol ships? Act as backup for us? Shoot something?”

  “Fine. We’ll compromise. We call Monty and let him know what’s up, but we intercept that thing now.”

  Ten minutes later, they received a text back from Monty Teach: I TOLD U IDIOTS NOT TO CALL. DON’T CARE WHAT YOU GOT INTO.

  Caleb shrugged at Jennifer. “Hate to say I told you so.”

  If Jennifer could have paced in anger, she would have. “Son of a biscuit! After saving all of Titan! I say we text Bez. He gave us his direct number for a reason.”

  “That was a get out of jail free card, not a we got a problem with bandits card.”

  “How do you know?”

  “He told me.”

  The Diamond Girl interrupted. “Caleb Day, I detect six inbound ships of pilotless design originating from the approaching asteroid.”

  The windscreen had circle identifiers around 6 fast approaching drones. The asteroid itself was visible now with no magnification.

  The ship’s computer continued, “You are being hailed via encrypted burst on the x-band. It has our side of the encryption key. Shall I let it through?”

  Caleb said, “Must’ve got it out of Spruck.” He looked at Jennifer, who shrugged with a what-do you-want-me-to-say look. He said, “Sure, let it through.”

  Spruck’s head popped up in the holoscreen. “Hey, buddy. How’d you find us?”

  COME ON IN, THE WATER'S FINE.

  SPRUCK’S FLOATING HOLOGRAPHIC head looked well enough, but he kept intentionally glancing to his right as though someone was just off screen. “So really, how’d you find us?”

  Caleb waved his arm to take in the area of the cockpit. “Uh, this ship has its advantages. Your abductors left a trail. You OK, buddy? Saanvi and Nat, OK?”

  Spruck chuckled, “Never better. We’ve uh, we’ve found ourselves some new friends.”

  Jennifer said, “Found?”

  “Yeah. So anyway, they sent out some escorts so that you can find your way safely into the landing bay.”

  Caleb said, “And what if we don’t want to land in the landing bay?”

  Spruck glanced to his right and said, “Oh, sure,” while stepping aside. His head was replaced by Jada’s, who said, “Hello there. I’s rememberin' yo.”

  Jennifer pointed at Jada’s head. “She’s the one who bought all the other robots.”

  Hee Sook interrupted, “Clarification. Paid for the right to offer us room and board in exchange for—“

  Jennifer waved her off. “Fine. Whatever.” To Jada, she said, “What’s the deal? You people blew me out an airlock, disabled this ship, and took our friends.”

  Jada nodded. “True dat.”

  The drone bots surrounded The Diamond Girl and came to a stop.

  Caleb offered a cocky shame-on-you look. “I’m assuming Mr. Jones filled you in on the capabilities of this ship?”

  Jada smiled like a hungry cat. “He did.”

  Caleb said, “So your bot-ships are toast if I want it that way.”

  Jada said, “That be interestin' to watch.”

  “No, seriously.”

  Jada smiled with hope. “Yes. Seriously.”

  Jennifer jumped in. “We called the cops!” Off Caleb’s look she said, “Well we did.”

  Jada shook her head like she was dealing with morons. “Ah’ight, here the deal. We be collectors o things. Things and occasionally folks. Turn out we fugged up when we be… gatherin’ yo friends and they disappearin’ ship. We left yo and yo… musclebound ship behind. Our bad.”

  Caleb said, “You bet your ass, your bad. You seriously messed up. Now here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna release our friends, and their disappearing ship and I won’t blow your fancy spinning rock to bits.”

  Jada said, “Honey. I’s appreciatin’ a bluff as much as anybody, but we be knowin’ exactly what kinds o firepower yo small but badass ship be capable of, and I, o everybody, truly appreciates yo chest pumpin'. But lets me show you somthin’.”

  Like a fleet of Swiss Army knives coming to life, the drone ships burst open with a huge display of firepower. The Diamond Girl’s threat warnings exploded into verbal lists of weapon types. Alarm horns blared, lights pulsed, lists of vectors, potential damage assessments, and countermeasure options popped up all over the windscreen and Caleb’s heads up—the gist of which was, you are fried meat in a tin c
an.

  “Diamond, stop!” yelled Caleb over the din.

  Everything returned to normal, except for the various target circles and related statistics for the mayhem the drones would cause.

  Jada, who had stepped away from the holovid on her side, stepped back in. “Wow, that be really loud.”

  Caleb noted his hands gripping his armrests so hard his knuckles were turning white. Jennifer’s were the same.

  Hee Sook said, “Mr. Day, may I suggest that the surrounding autonomous assault ships have an advantage over us?”

  Caleb looked over his shoulder at her and sneered, “No, you may not.”

  Jada said, “Your maid right, handsome.” She put on a friendly faux Southern US accent. “Now why don’t ya’ll come on in for a visit. Your friends’ll tell yuh the water just right.” Her head left the holovid to be replaced again with Spruck’s. He said, “Hey, so yeah. You should come on in. Everything’s OK. Really.” His lips mouthed the word, Fight.

  Spruck was yanked from view and Jada popped back in. “Sugar, our battle computer have you takin' out one, maybe two our drones before yo bein’ burnin' oxygen-starved Jello. Yo remember Jello?”

  “Of course I remember Jello.”

  “Jello cans be colorful wiggly fun. Or it cans be melted slag.”

  Caleb said, “That’s very descriptive but—“

  Jennifer put a hand on his. “You’re not going to win a fire or witty banter fight with this one. Let’s just go in.” To Jada she said, “Remember, we called the cops.”

  Jada just smiled.

  Caleb noticed his mouth hanging open as The Diamond Girl entered the honeycomb, while still surrounded by the robot drones. He closed it and swallowed.

  Jennifer recognized the ship that assaulted them, then pointed at Spruck’s ship. “There’s the Belle.”

  Both outside the entrance and now inside, an assortment of surface-mounted guns tracked them. One of the few empty hexagonal docking stations was pulsing with dull red light. Caleb instructed his ship to land there, then let The Diamond Girl do one of the things she did best. He pulled off his helmet and turned to Jennifer. “What’s stopping them from just shooting us and taking my ship?”

  Jennifer tried to control the sound of anger, but it nevertheless came through gritted teeth. “Nothing. You didn’t want to call for help. So, nothing stops them from shooting us and taking our ship. You’re the gunslinger, so you tell me.”

  Caleb looked back at Hee Sook who said, “I also have no answer to your question. If you would like me to recite probabilities, I’m afraid that I don’t have enough data to make an educated guess. However, I suspect my value to the occupants of this space station differs from yours. I can safely conclude that shooting me is less a likelihood than it is for you.” She took the irritation in his face for stress. “If it will ease your mind, Mr. Day, I can also safely say that statistically speaking, if we pose no physical threat to them, the probability of them choosing to shoot any of us becomes significantly less.”

  As the ship came to a gentle rest on the docking platform, they could feel a bit of micro gravity. Enough that they noted the weight of their bodies in the seats.

  Jennifer said, “Ooh that feels good. I can’t wait to get to the outer corridors of this place.” She touched her hair, which she kept in a tight bun when she was in zero G. “Can’t wait to feel the weight of my hair on my shoulders.”

  Caleb said, “Really? That’s your thought bubble?”

  They heard and even felt the thump of the airlock dock as it connected with the ship. The Diamond Girl said, “Docking procedure complete. I detect suitable air outside the airlock. Would you like me to open the door?”

  “Hang loose a sec.”

  “Very well. I am receiving another communication request for the holovid.”

  “Put it up.”

  Natalie’s head filled the space. Before she could say anything, Jennifer blurted out, “Nat, you’re OK.”

  “Hi, Vanilla Shake. Guys, real quick. They have a vetting system here of sorts. Um, I’m not allowed to tell you much more except, just do as they say and it’ll be fine.”

  Caleb said, “I don’t like the sound of that.”

  Natalie said, “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, but I know you’ll be fine. Especially you, Caleb.”

  “What does that mean?”

  Natalie continued, “A couple of big nice sentient robots will meet you at the door.” She spotted Hee Sook. “Hiya, Hee Sook.”

  “Hello, Natalie. It is good to see you. You seem well.”

  “Sure. Thanks. So anyway, don’t do anything you… Caleb, all ya’ll, just follow the robot’s instructions.”

  Caleb groaned. “Why all the mystery?”

  Natalie said, “It’s part of their vetting system. Just go with it.”

  “What’s to vet?”

  The communication ended and Natalie’s head disappeared from the holoscreen.

  Caleb said, “I don’t like it. I swear Spruck mouthed fight.”

  Jennifer unbuckled her seatbelt. “I’ve known Natalie Beal a long time. She’s good at shooting bull hockey, but she isn’t right now. She’s trying to protect us from something, so I say we follow her instructions.” She stood and bounced a bit on the floor. Using the various handholds that were strategically spread around the ship, she began walking to the back. “Let’s get this over with.”

  Hee Sook followed her. Caleb looked around the cockpit as though it might hold some answer for him. He sighed and unbuckled his own belt.

  When they opened the airlock door and stepped through the docking tunnel, the pleasure models, Silvio and Candy were waiting for them. Candy said, “Welcome to The Island.” She addressed Caleb and Jennifer separately. “If you’ll please follow me, we will provide you with some refreshment and a chance to clean up and put on a change of clothes.” To Hee Sook, she sent a private. The digital burst translated to, Hello Hee Sook. It is good to see you are repaired. These are instructions for where you shall go for vetting purposes.

  Hee Sook responded aloud, “I would prefer to stay with my team.”

  Silvio offered an insincere robotic smile. “That will not be necessary. You will be reunited later.”

  A third robot, Link, the one who in the octagon had turned Hee Sook’s face into synthetic hamburger, stepped into the hallway. He greeted her with a devilish smile and sent her a burst. Follow me. If you create trouble I will rip off your new face.

  Hee Sook said to Caleb and Jennifer, “I’m to follow this one. I will see you again soon.”

  Link turned, and she followed him around the bend. When they were out of sight, the light in corridor briefly flashed around the remaining four.

  “What was that?” asked Jennifer. The two robots looked distorted to her for a moment, like they were standing in front of a funhouse mirror. Then everything was just as it was.

  Silvio gestured forward, “If you will follow us, we’ll guide you to some stronger gravity.”

  Five minutes later, after a nausea inducing elevator ride that left Caleb and Jennifer finally feeling the full weight of 1G, they disembarked into an empty hallway. Jennifer pulled the band out of her bun and let her hair fall to her shoulders and she shook it out. Candy stepped in front of an automatic door which opened to reveal a room with a half-dozen chairs that could have been found in a barber salon.

  Caleb said, “Good. I could use a haircut.”

  Silvio said, “Please have a seat in any chair you wish.”

  Jennifer said, “You’re not cutting my hair.”

  Silvio smiled, and again said, “Please have a seat in any chair of your choosing.”

  They chose seats next to each other. The moment they were settled in, wrist and ankle cuffs snapped out of hiding and firmly locked the two occupants in their chairs. They protested loudly as the robots tightened head-straps around their foreheads, Candy saying, “Please accept our apologies for any discomfort. Your cooperation will help make this very quick and
simple.”

  Caleb yelled, “Fuck your quick and simple! Spruck! Nat! What’s going on?”

  A woman of East Asian descent walked into the room. “Good day,” she said in educated British English. “I’m Doctor Lee, I’ll be administering your cocktail today. If you don’t mind, I have a trainee following me.” Saanvi entered the room carrying a tray bearing two needle-less injectors.

  “Saanvi, what gives?” blurted Caleb as he struggled against the restraints.

  Saanvi said, “Hi guys. Nothing to worry about.”

  Jennifer went for the softer tack asking, “Friend, can you explain what’s going on and why we are being held like this?”

  “And what the hell’s in those syringes?” added Caleb.

  Dr. Lee lifted one syringe off the tray and approached Caleb. “Let’s begin with you.”

  “How about let’s not? How about fuck off?”

  Dr. Lee placed the injector against the left side of his neck. Caleb’s eyes bulged and looked left, as if trying to pop them out of his head to watch what was happening. There was a pffft sound, and the doctor stepped back. “There. Not so bad. Didn’t feel a thing did you?”

  “What did you put in me? Saanvi, what did she put in me?”

  Saanvi held out the tray for Dr. Lee to grab the next syringe.

  Tears welled in Jennifer’s eyes. “Why?”

  Saanvi said nothing. Instead, she stepped back and held the now empty tray at her side. Caleb continued to bitch, but his protests fell into the background of Jennifer’s perception. For a blink, as she looked at Saanvi, the funhouse mirror distortion happened again; the tall woman’s figure bending as though the light in the room had swiftly changed and changed back. Jennifer assumed that it was her own tears causing the warping, but then again it had happened to the robots outside the airlock. In the back of her mind she recalled having a similar experience, but couldn’t place it. As she stared at her friend, Saanvi cast her eyes downward, avoiding eye contact. Jennifer felt the injector against her neck. It felt cool, and there was a moment of pressure at the injection point, but it was otherwise painless.

  The door swished open and in walked Jada, accompanied by Boyce, Jyme, and the pirate leader, Pablo Chicharron. A clear swagger in his step offset Pablo’s stature as a shorter balding man with a droopy mustache. T892, who kept a step behind and to the right of Jada, followed them.