“Can we sit?” Jack waited for her to take a seat before he joined her on the sofa.
“What's wrong?” Rose couldn’t imagine what could suddenly be bothering him. Before they'd left his place, he had seemed completely carefree.
“I would have told you this before but I didn't want anything to ruin our time together.” He took a deep breath. There was nothing to do but just say it. “Rose, your aunt came to see me last Wednesday.”
“What did she want?”
Jack couldn't have guessed what Rose’s reaction would be, but he'd expected something more than a flat, monotone question.
“I’m not sure. She did this creepy come-on routine but it was so obvious and over the top it’s hard to believe she was serious.”
“Oh, she was serious.” Rose felt all the happiness that she'd experienced during the last two days draining out of her body. Just knowing that Louise had been nearby was enough to suddenly make her fifteen years old again trapped in a horror show that was her aunt’s life. Harper Falls had always been a safe haven from that. A place Louise avoided thought was beneath her notice. And now she’d tried to sprinkle her unique brand of poison on Jack.
“You should go.” Rose needed to be alone, to find her heaviest blanket and borrow inside. She had to find a way to combat the cold that was seeping into her bones.
“Let me call Drew and tell him I can’t make it.” Jack had never seen Rose like this. It was almost as though she was shrinking into herself. He took her hand, alarmed at how icy it had become.
“No,” she pulled away. It took all the effort she could muster, but Rose forced herself to stand. With deliberate steps she walked to the door. Grasping the knob she pulled it open and leaned against it for support. “Go to work, Jack.”
“I’m not leaving you alone. Jesus, Rose, you’re trembling.”
“I'm tired.” She couldn’t explain it to him. But she didn’t want him to see her like this. She was crawling into a hole that was dark and confining, one that took a lot of time and effort to climb out of. Jack couldn’t be a part of that.
“I’ll go, but only if you promise to call Tyler or Dani. Hell, call them both.” She started to protest, but Jack wasn’t going to budge on this. “Call them, Rose. I’ll be in my SUV, but I’m not driving away until I see one of them arrive.”
“Fine.” She wanted to be angry. But she couldn’t generate enough heat to do more than pick up her phone and hit speed dial. Satisfied that she wasn't going be alone, Jack finally left.
Rose watched the door close then shuffled back to the sofa, sinking into a boneless heap. With a sigh she raised the phone to her ear.
“Dani?” It wasn't until she heard the catch in her voice that Rose realized Jack had been right; she needed her friends. “Can you come over? And bring Tyler.”
IT TOOK SIX hours and endless pots of tea but Rose finally felt warm again.
Tyler and Dani had arrived within minutes of her call. There were no long explanations necessary. While Dani gathered thick socks and a downy comforter, Tyler heated the water for tea. She also called the local diner and ordered hot soup to be delivered. From then on it was just a matter of them being there. Bracketing her on the sofa, lending their warmth unconditionally.
At some point she must have dozed off, the exhaustion finally pulling her under. When she finally opened her eyes again, her head felt a little fuzzy, and she found herself stretched out on the couch alone. The clock on the far wall read four o’clock and since it was still light outside she figured that was p.m. not a.m. Slowly she became aware of muffled voices coming from the kitchen. She wasn’t surprised. Dani and Tyler wouldn’t have left her by herself.
“Ready for more soup?”
“Bathroom.” Any more liquid and she would float away.
When she came back, Rose felt like she just might be on her way to being counted among the living. It was amazing what brushing your teeth and splashing some cold water on your face could do for your outlook on life.
She found her friends waiting for her in the living room. And though they didn't say, it was obvious they were still concerned. This had hit quicker and harder than ever before, and neither of them had any prior experience to draw from.
“I was happy.” Rose didn’t know how else to begin. “I had no defenses to fight it because I’d let them all down. Jack must have thought I was crazy. He didn't even say her name—just your aunt—and I was practically catatonic.”
“He didn’t leave until we got here,” Dani pointed out.
“If he’s smart he’ll never come back.”
“That's crazy and you know it.” Tyler would only let her wallow so long. Now that Rose had her feet back under her it was time for some tough love. “When you were fifteen you had no choice. She was your legal guardian; you had to go with her. But she can’t hurt you now unless you let her.”
“Two years of therapy and I’m still a mess. A mess with a train wreck attached.” Rose finally felt a stirring of anger. “I can’t force the bitch to stay away. Now that she has the scent she's bound to make another run at Jack—especially since I’m involved with him.”
“You don’t think Jack would…?” The thought was too disturbing for Dani to finish.
“God, no.” The last thing Rose was worried about was Jack being seduced by Louise. “But if I keep seeing him I’m going to have to tell him everything.”
“What exactly are you worried about, Rose?”
“What aren’t I worried about?” Rose paused to gather her thoughts. Most of her worries were irrational but knowing that didn’t magically erase them. “The last time I talked about any of this was to my therapist and that was almost ten years ago. I’m happy to say I rarely think about it anymore.”
“That’s good.” Dani squeezed her hand.
“But what if I tell him and he thinks I’ve blown it all out of proportion.”
“Rose—” Tyler began.
“No, hear me out. I wasn’t physically harmed, not really. There are people who go through much worse, for much longer periods of time.”
“She drugged you,” Tyler exclaimed. Unfortunately, it was all too easy to conjure up the image of Rose, too thin and hooked up to an IV, lying in a hospital bed. “She took a laughing, happy girl and, in the course of a few months, turned her into a withdrawn bundle of nerves. Jack won’t try to diminish that.”
“No,” she agreed. Jack would be compassionate, which brought her to her biggest fear. “I don’t want him to see me as a victim. If he knows everything I suddenly become that girl with the troubled past. Jack grew up in an Ozzie and Harriet world. Why would he want to take me on?”
“Ozzie and Harriet?” Tyler scoffed. “Jack?”
For the first time in hours Rose smiled. “With a few minor differences. The Nelsons were in black and white—Jack lives in vivid Technicolor.” With an even bigger smile, she added “And Jack would never get a G rating.”
“More like…?” Tyler urged.
“Most days, PG-13. In private? XXX.”
“Oh, we will need details,” Dani declared. “But for now I’ll give you some advice and I hope you take it. There was nothing wrong with your life before you started seeing Jack so if you break up with him it won't be the end of the world. But he makes you happy, Rose. And there’s something to be said for a man with XXX sensibilities. I say take a chance. Go for the happy.”
“And the great sex,” Tyler chimed in.
“There is that.” Rose would have to think on it. But for now she wanted to clear her mind of her problems and binge out on someone else’s.
“I have Outlander DVR’d. Anybody for ice cream and some time travel?”
JACK WAS PISSED. It didn’t often happen, and it never lasted long. Oh, he could hold a grudge with the best of them. But he’d never let it consume him. He’d put it away and deal with it if and when the problem reared its head. But, for the most part, Jack Winston did not stew.
Drew had given Jack plen
ty of room for the past few days. But whatever had happened with Rose was eating at Jack, and while he didn’t know the details, he understood that his best friend was in a bad place. It was his duty to either leave him be, get him drunk or find something for him to hit. He’d done the first, and he knew that after what happened the last time he couldn’t get him drunk again. So that only left one option.
“Get off your, ass. We’re going to the gym.”
“Fuck off.” Jack didn’t bother to look up, he just growled and went back to work.
“Downstairs, now. If I have to come back up here to get you, there will be blood.” And since he knew not all of it would be Jack's, Drew hoped like hell Jack followed him.
Jack didn’t hurry. In fact, part of him hoped Drew would come back. A little spilled blood sounded good about now. But after thinking about it for a few minutes he finally gave in. Shutting down his computer and headed to the gym. It was a short trip but by the time he got there he was ready to rip Drew a new one.
The last few days had been hell. He hadn’t slept more than a few restless hours each night; Rose wasn’t answering her phone and his pride wouldn’t let him beat down her door. The last thing he wanted was Drew trying to help him work out his frustrations. He slammed into the gym expecting a one on one confrontation. What he found was Drew and five hulking strangers in workout clothes.
“You want to explain?”
“You need to hit something; these gentlemen have volunteered.”
Jack gave Drew a 'you have got to be shitting me' look. “I repeat, you want to explain?”
“We have a few openings with the security crew and these guys have applied. Let’s call this their preliminary interview. If they can get through you, they move on to stage two.”
Jack could have argued. There was no such thing as a preliminary interview. But he was in the mood to hit something. Earlier that morning he'd gone several rounds with a punching bag but since it didn't hit back he hadn't gotten much satisfaction.
“Give me a minute to change.” He took a moment to look at his would-be opponents. They were big and looked strong, but they were young. “You guys take the time while I'm gone to think this over. And you,” he called to Drew. “Fill them in on what to expect. I don’t plan on taking it easy. If any of them wants to back out, don’t let the others give them a hard time. In fact, the ones that leave might just be the smartest guys in the room.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
ROSE PULLED HER car to a stop. The parking lot outside H&W Security was fuller than she’d expected. She was hoping to find Jack alone so they could talk without any interruptions. Maybe now wasn't a good time. But then what would be? She was here, and she needed to get this over with. She’d been ignoring Jack’s calls and pretty much hiding out for three days. He deserved an explanation. After that the rest was up to him.
Before she could even hit the intercom button, the doors clicked open. Surprised, Rose looked over at the reception desk to see Pam waving her in.
“Thank goodness. I’m afraid they’re going to kill him.”
That didn’t sound good. Should she panic? In spite of her rather inflammatory greeting, Pam seemed relatively calm. Rose decided to save her panicking until she had a few more details.
“Who’s going to kill whom?”
“Five brutes, in the gym, with Jack.”
Jack and brutes were all Rose needed to hear.
“The stairs are to the right,” Pam called out after her.
She remembered. It only took her a minute to get down the two flights but then she had to stop and get her bearings. Pool, then weight room, then gym.
It seemed awfully quiet, Rose thought as she hurried towards the door at the far end of the pool. If someone was trying to kill Jack shouldn’t there be yelling? That night outside the tavern she distinctly remembered a lot of yelling.
Afraid of what she was going to find, Rose hit the door at a run. There was no yelling, but the three guys on the floor were groaning up a storm. She was relieved to see that none of them was Jack. She didn’t see him anywhere, but she did see Drew. He didn’t seem overly concerned about the bruised and bleeding men and at the moment she wasn't either.
“Is Jack alright?”
Drew grinned and nodded. “He hit them,” he indicated the men who were helping each other stagger to their feet. “And then he hit the shower. You’ll find him in there.”
Jack leaned his forearm against the tile and let the multiple jets of water beat over his body. It hadn’t been much a contest. Big kids, little training equaled three big booms and a couple of bloody noses. They’d be fine. More hurt pride than anything else. Jack, on the other hand, was no longer angry, which meant the adrenaline that had been keeping him on his feet had worn off. All he wanted was to finish his shower and head home. Well, he also wanted Rose, but there wasn’t anything he could do about that right now.
“Need your back washed?”
His eyes popped open, but he didn’t straighten. Instead, he watched under his raised arm as Rose removed the last of her clothes and walked towards him through the steam and water. She pushed the lever on the soap dispenser, letting the liquid pool in her hand. Moving behind him, she rubbed the soap into his back until a lather formed and ran down his spine. The scent of lemon filled the shower, sharp and clean. Jack put both hands on the wall in front of him. He arched his back, savoring the feel of her soap slicked hands as they moved up his tense muscles, stopping so she could firmly message the space between his neck and shoulders.
“Relax, let me take care of you.”
Rose could feel the knots under her hands slowly loosen. Moving closer she rubbed against him, her nipples hardening. She followed the disappearing soap with a trail of soft kisses. He smelled so good, like nothing else, masculine, clean—like Jack. She slipped her hand around his body wanting to feel his arousal. She wanted to give him pleasure. But before she could reach her goal, Jack took her and pulled her in front of him. He lifted her hands above her head and pinned them to the wet tile with one of his. His mouth opened over hers, greedy and demanding as the water cascaded over them in warm waves.
They didn’t speak but Rose saw everything that she needed to know in his clear, blue eyes. He needed her, wanted her. Lifting one of her legs, he hooked it around his thigh. Bending just slightly he began to enter her, slowly, inch by agonizing inch. Her eyes never left his; their breathing synced in perfect unison. There was no hurry; the build was gentle but intense. Minutes passed or was it hours? Time didn't matter. And as they reached their peak they came together, the rush so powerful she felt her legs begin to buckle. But Jack had her, his strong arms keeping her safe as they floated slowly down to earth again.
Jack gave her one last kiss before reaching over and turning off the water. Guiding her from the shower he took a large towel and began to dry her hair.
It felt good to let him take care of her. She closed her eyes and just relaxed as he wiped the moisture from her body and then quickly did the same to himself. He found her clothes and handed to them to her before he dressed himself.
“Is your car outside?”
Rose nodded. They silently made their way through the building. She wondered where everyone had gone. Drew must have cleared them all out for which she was grateful. She’d been so intent on finding Jack that it hadn’t occurred to her that someone might walk in on them while they were in the shower. Not that either of them would have noticed. But still, it would have been embarrassing to find out later that someone had observed them.
After setting the alarm, Jack led her to his SUV. He assured her that her car would be fine, but that was the least of her worries. She’d run what she was going to say to him over and over in her mind and on the short trip to his house she thought it through one more time. But now that the moment was almost here she realized no amount of preparation was going to help. She would say her peace and that would be that. It was the unknown that was frightening. What would Jack's reacti
on be? But before she said anything else there was something she needed to do. After he had let them both into the house, Rose began to apologize.
“I’m sorry, Rose.”
That threw her for a moment. Jack had nothing to be sorry for.
“Jack—”
“Sit, please.” She did, expecting him to join her. Instead, he paced.
“I shouldn’t have dropped the news about your aunt’s visit so abruptly,” he began after a few moments.
“Jack, there was no way you could have anticipated my reaction.” Rose was horrified to think he’d been feeling guilty for the last few days. “It was extreme, to say the least.”
“I got a little glimpse of what your aunt is like.” He finally joined her on the sofa. “Will you tell me about her? About what she did to you?”
“I wish I had some great revelation I could share with you, Jack. I spent a lot of time in therapy looking for one.” It hadn’t been a complete waste of time, but there hadn’t been any magic answers either. She was still screwed up, just to a lesser degree.
“I told you that I was sent to live with my aunt after my mother died. What I didn’t tell you was that she didn’t just die, she committed suicide.”
Jack was shocked. “Rose, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
“Very few people know.” Rose closed her eyes; it was such an ugly subject. “I felt guilty.” She’d never admitted that to anyone besides her therapist. Not even Dani and Tyler knew. But for some reason she needed to tell Jack.
“Why?”
“I loved my mother and I think, in her way, she loved me. I tried so hard to cheer her up. The first song I ever wrote was silly and so bad, but it made her smile.” Rose cringed when she thought of it. Ninety percent plagiarized and one hundred percent crap. But it was all it took to get her hooked, music became her passion—her escape.
“After she died I cried. Maybe that was when I cried myself out. Tears don't come easily to me anymore. And I missed her. But I also felt free. I was nine years old and I’d never felt like a kid.”
If I Loved You (Harper Falls Book 1) Page 15