Cheaper to Keep Her (part 1)

by Swinson presents Unique, Kiki

  “Why are you being so mean!?” I screamed. Unable to control my emotions, I suddenly burst out crying.

  Duke chuckled. “You young girls gotta get it together. You knew I was busy when I picked your ass up out the gutter,” Duke said maliciously. Then he walked out of the bedroom. He left me crying hysterically.

  “Ahhhhh!” I screamed out of frustration when I heard the condo door slam. I was beside myself. I laid back down and cried until my chest hurt.

  When I finally pulled myself together, I noticed that Duke had left me a stack of cash on the dining room table. I picked it up and flipped through it. It was his usual $3,000.

  “I will just go shopping and make myself feel better,” I mumbled. I knew damn well buying even more clothes than I had already acquired over the past six months wasn’t going to do shit for my aching heart. But I still got dressed and went to the mall. It was the first place Duke and I had gone shopping together. Walking into Saks made me feel kind of sad about how things were going with us. I spotted Caroline, the saleswoman who had helped Duke and me the day he’d brought me here. She noticed me, but acted like she didn’t recognize me. I walked up to her. Surely, she must’ve remembered me.

  “Hello, Caroline,” I said sweetly.

  The old bitch crinkled her eyebrows at me. “Have we met?” she asked me.

  “Yes, yes. I came in with Mr. Carrington, my boyfriend. You helped me pick out dresses and shoes,” I reminded her.

  She snorted a bit. “I’m sorry, I don’t remember you. Mr. Carrington is accompanied by so many different women, I just can’t keep it straight,” the old bitty said sarcastically.

  A hot feeling came over me. I didn’t consider myself a violent person but I wanted to reach out and slap the shit out of this pompous, white bitch. I didn’t fucking ask her who Duke came here to shop with. I was speechless. I couldn’t move. It was as if I had been crazy glued to that spot in the store.

  “Now would you like to open up your own personal shopper account? Because, I usually only help the women that are escorted by Mr. Carrington,” the evil bitch said mockingly.

  I could feel my face getting flush. The entire store began to spin around me. I gripped the counter for support and took a deep breath. I had to throw up. Composure was the word I was looking for . . . composure I didn’t have at the moment.

  I was finally able to move. I ran out of the store. My heels clacked against the mall tiles as I tried to get to my car before I lost my lunch all over the place. I was crying. I could feel a waterfall of tears streaming down my face. My body temperature soared. I felt faint. As soon as I made it to my car, I bent over and threw up. My face was a mess, a mixture of tears, snot and vomit. I was so weak and distraught. My worst fear had been confirmed. Duke was cheating on me! I didn’t want to believe it, but now it all made sense. The day I had gone into Saks with him, Caroline’s old white ass laughed at me. She knew I was one of many stupid ass women who fell for Duke Carrington’s shit. Things were starting to slip fast.

  I sat in my car for at least an hour before I could finally drive. The first place I went when I left the mall parking lot was to CVS. I needed to find out why all of a sudden I was so sick

  .

  Cheaper to Keep Her Unique

  Chapter 15—Damn, Damn, Damn

  I raced back to the condo feeling and looking a mess.

  With my little pharmacy bag in hand, I went into the bathroom and fumbled out of my jeans. I sat on the toilet and ripped open the small box. My heart was hammering so fast I was almost out of breath. I pulled out the little white test stick and forced my urine out in a fast stream. I put the stick between my legs and when I thought I’d gotten enough piss on it, I set it on the side of the sink.

  I was so nervous I started gnawing on my fake nail tips. “C’mon . . . c’mon,” I urged, staring at the test. As if my utterances would make the results appear faster. The little window that turns pink when it was time to read the test results seemed to take forever. Finally, it was completely pink, which meant, it was time to read the results.

  I inhaled deeply and picked up the little device. This was the new and improved test . . . the one that showed the words pregnant or not pregnant so there was no mistaking the results. And for sure, there was damn sure no mistaking what the capital letters read . . . PREGNANT.

  I cupped my hand over my mouth. I didn’t know whether to feel happy or sad. A baby! A fucking baby! Me, a mother! Damn, damn, damn!

  All kinds of thoughts invaded my head. The final thought was that this could only be a good thing. Although Duke and I hadn’t been together long, he had taken care of me and I knew he wouldn’t turn his back on his own baby. He didn’t have any kids or so I hoped. I figured a baby would make him very happy. Maybe this was what he needed to bring him home at nights and make him spend more time with me. Maybe if I gave him his only child, he would finally marry me. With that in mind I grew excited. This baby would be the best thing for our relationship. I told myself. I was excited.

  I walked around the condo touching my stomach over and over again. I kept playing what I would say to Duke repeatedly in my mind. I definitely wasn’t going to tell him over the phone. I would call him and tell him I needed to see him right away. I could just envision him snatching me up in a big bear hug and whirling me around. I was thinking he would shower my face with kisses and tell me to sit down, because he didn’t want anything to happen to his precious baby.

  The thoughts made me so antsy, I was going to call Duke and interrupt whatever he was doing. Yeah! That was what I decided to do. I could hardly contain my excitement as I dialed his cell phone number. I gripped my cell phone tighter and tighter each time Duke’s phone rang on the other end without an answer. My stomach was in knots now. A feeling of dread and disappointment washed over me.

  Then I heard his voicemail. “This muthafucka is ignoring my calls!” I screamed out loud. I ran my shaking hands through my hair. “He better answer this fucking time!” I dialed the number again. This time it went straight to voicemail. “Ok, maybe he is trying to call me back,” I reasoned.

  I hung up my phone and stared at it, waiting to see if Duke’s call back would come through. I kept looking at the phone. With each minute that passed my blood pressure went higher and higher. I was fucking fuming mad now. “How does this bastard know if I’m calling for an emergency or not!” I screamed out.

  I called Duke’s number back again. It immediately went to voicemail. That meant he turned his phone off. After he saw my missed call, he had the nerve to turn his phone off. I threw my cell phone down on the floor and tossed the pregnancy test into the trash. My happy moment had once again faded to black. Without Duke, there was nothing to be fucking happy about.

  After calling Duke’s phone at least a dozen more times, I must have dozed off because I was startled by my cell phone’s loud ringing. I jumped up and looked around. I was on the floor in front of the bed, where I must’ve cried myself to sleep. I went and picked up my phone. It had already stopped ringing. I knew it was Duke calling to tell me he was sorry for not answering my calls.

  To my great disappointment, when I looked at my cell the screen read Diamond. I sucked my teeth. But I guess she would do. I pressed send to call her back. She answered on the first ring. Diamond was screaming into the phone almost breathless. I couldn’t understand her at first, but then I heard his name.

  Diamond had said Duke’s name in the same sentence with the words . . . another bitch. With my phone to my ear I raced towards the condo door.

  Cheaper to Keep Her Unique

  Chapter 16—Too Many Hoes

  The tears were rolling down my face like waterfalls during my entire drive.

  I drove with reckless abandon. I was speeding like a madwoman and I cut off more than one driver. When I finally pulled my car into the Magic City parking lot, I couldn’t put it in park fast enough. I stormed through the club’s doors and stopped. I moved my head left to right scanning for Duke’s as
s. My chest was heaving up and down and I was no longer upset, I was in a blind fucking rage. Finally, I saw Diamond rushing towards me. She had her hands out as if she was going to try to stop me.

  “Wait, Lynise . . . wait!” Diamond cautioned me.

  “No, fuck that Diamond! Where is he?” I screamed over the loud music.

  “Let me just calm you down first. I don’t want you to—” Diamond tried reasoning.

  “Move!” I cut her off and pushed past her.

  I knew right away where the fuck Duke was at. She didn’t have to tell me. I stalked towards the champagne room. I could hardly breathe. I could hear Diamond running behind me. It was too late for all of that. I snatched the door open and I gasped at what I saw. I could see Duke sitting back on one of the leather sofas and the ass cheeks of the new stripper Diamond had told me about named Christa. She was standing on the couch straddling Duke’s face. He had his hands on her ass pushing her towards his open mouth. This muthfucka was actually eating the pussy of a strange bitch! How fucking dare he! I was the one kissing him on the mouth. I had never been in that position with Duke. It was always straight up and down hardcore fucking.

  I felt as if I was going to stop breathing. My vision became completely clouded with red. I clenched my fists together and I charged straight for them.

  “Arrggghh! You muthafuckin’ liar!” I screeched as I moved forward. I felt like I was possessed by the devil. The girl whipped her head around and screamed when she saw me coming straight for her, but it was too fucking late.

  I snatched that bitch off the sofa by her long hair, which was a wig and it came right off. She was so shocked she didn’t have time to break her fall or keep her wig on. She landed on the floor on her naked ass. I reached down and grabbed the little patch of real hair she had slicked back to put her wig on. With one hand I held onto Christa’s real hair and with the other hand I started pounding her in the face. She tried to grab my hair but I was wailing on her ass so hard she couldn’t see to grab my long ponytail.

  “Lynise! Oh my God!” Diamond screamed out.

  But I wasn’t letting go of the bitch. I couldn’t, no, I wouldn’t let this bitch or any other bitch disrespect me.

  Duke was busy trying to fix himself. The asshole had also begun taking his dick out of his pants when I caught him. His shit was literally open around his waist. I guess he was going to fuck the bitch too. The girl was screaming but I wasn’t letting her go and I continued banging her in her face. Finally, I felt Duke grab me around my waist.

  “Lynise, stop this shit! She ain’t do shit to you!” he barked at me, finally able to pry me off his little nasty bitch. I had her hair all tangled around my hands and my knuckles ached from hitting her. I was out of breath and sweaty.

  Perspiration donned my body from head to toe. Plus, I was still beyond pissed off. My reflexes made keen and I was still in kick-somebody’s-ass mode.

  “Oh, you gon’ defend this bitch! Fuck you! You a nasty bastard! All that shit you talked about not being the strip club type of nigga! You’re a fucking liar!” I screamed until my voice started cracking.

  Duke let me go with a shove and I went stumbling. It was as if he was dismissing me. “Lynise, go home. I’ll be there when I can,” he said calmly, putting his hands up in a talk to the hand kind of motion. This bastard had the audacity to act cool and try to send me away like I was a child.

  “Fuck you asshole! You’re a dirty muthafucka! You think I don’t know about the bitches in Saks and all that too, right? You piece of shit! You whack dick nigga!” I was trying to find any words that would make him feel even close to the amount of humiliation and hurt I felt.

  “You hide behind your money and your fancy cars! But you ain’t shit!” I continued my rant. “You come from shit and you ain’t never gon’ be shit! You gotta buy pussy! You think any of these bitches would give you the time of day if you was that same ’hood trash you were born as!” I was throwing his personal secrets he had confided in me during some of our dinner dates back in his face in public. I just wanted him to feel as embarrassed as I did.

  Duke grabbed my face roughly. “Shut your fucking mouth!” he hissed. There was a crowd in the champagne room now. The security guards were trying to level with me to get me to leave. I wasn’t having it.

  “Your mama didn’t want you! That’s why you gotta buy women!” I continued, mumbling as he put pressure on my face. That was the last straw for Duke. He grabbed me by my hair and started dragging me from the club. Diamond was screaming for him to let me go. The security guards knew Duke and evidently knew him well, because they just let him drag me as if I was a rag doll. I should have realized then how big his ass was in the eyes of many, but a woman scorn is a woman who can’t think straight in the heat of the moment.

  “Get off of me! Owww!” I cried out in pain. Duke continued dragging me out the door. When we got outside he pushed me down to the ground right in the dirt of the parking lot. I was on my knees screaming and crying. All of my former co-workers from the club were outside watching the drama. Duke lifted his foot and kicked dirt on me. The dusty dry earth got on my face and in my hair, on my hands and knees. I started coughing and crying even harder.

  “I picked you up from the gutter and the dirt, and bitch, I will send you right back if you ever disrespect me in public again. Now take your needy, funky ass home!” Duke spat, kicking me in the ass.

  “Aggghhhhhh!” I screamed as I tried to pull myself off the ground. I didn’t even have the strength to move. I actually felt as if I wanted to die rather than live with the utter embarrassment and shame I was feeling.

  Diamond came over to me. “C’mon on, Lynise. I’m sorry about all of this. I can’t believe this nigga,” Diamond consoled as she helped me get to my feet. I grabbed onto her and just sobbed uncontrollably. Not only was I humiliated at how Duke had treated me in front of my co-workers, I was left with the reality that I was pregnant by him, a man who had no regard for women.

  Diamond came back to the condo with me and helped me clean myself up. That’s when I told her I was pregnant.

  “Oh no, Lynise. After what happened tonight you need to be heading to the chop shop and getting that baby out of you,” Diamond said flatly. I knew if it were under any other circumstances, she would have been very happy for me.

  “How can you say that Diamond? He cheated yes, but he doesn’t know about the baby yet. When I tell him, it might change things between us,” I said, dabbing tears from my eyes.

  “Do what you want, Lynise, but bringing another life into a fucked up situation is a big decision,” Diamond began her lecture. “This nigga just cheated on you in a public place. Then he kicked dirt on you, literally and kicked you in the ass. Obviously, he is not the man you thought he was . . . a real man ain’t gon’ do no shit like that.”

  I couldn’t even look at her because her words were driving a knife in my heart.

  “Just remember our fucked up childhoods with no good ass fathers,” Diamond reminded me.

  She had a point.

  But I was still holding onto hope that once Duke knew about the baby he would come around. I was really thinking that as soon as he knew he would make me his wifey.

  Diamond made sure I was all right and then she got ready to leave. I gave her a long hard hug and thanked her for everything. When she left, my feelings went from sorrow to straight unadulterated anger. I kept playing the club scene over and over in my mind. I was stupid repeating the worst day of life in my mind. That thought coupled with me replaying the voice of the old bitch ass saleswoman at Saks mocking me made me feel even worse.

  I stormed into the den, unlocked Duke’s desk and took even more money out of his lock box. Usually, I would only take a few of the bills from the middle so he wouldn’t really notice, but this time, I said fuck him and took two whole stacks of money. I was sure it had to be at least a couple of thousand dollars. I also picked up some of his business papers, household bills and some business contacts. I to
ok all the stuff and stashed it away in a secure place amongst my things.

  Just as I finished hiding everything, I was startled by the condo door slamming. I jumped and rushed over to the bed before Duke could come into the room. “Shit,” I huffed under my breath thinking that was a very close call. I wasn’t expecting Duke to come to the condo after everything that had happened. I was sure he would leave me in the condo alone for the night.

  Duke came into the room and headed straight for the bathroom. At first, I tried to will myself to stay calm, but my emotions got the best of me. I couldn’t keep it together any longer. I didn’t know if it was my hormones from being pregnant or what, but I busted out crying in the bed. I got up and tried to go into the bathroom to talk to Duke but he had locked the door. I began banging on the door and screaming for Duke to open it.

  “Duke, how could you do this to me!” I roared through my tears. “I gave up everything for you! You humiliated me! I can’t believe you!” My throat was burning from screaming so much.

  Finally, he opened the door. I looked at him out of my red, swollen eyes. His facial expression was like stone. “Lynise, if you ever embarrass me like that again in public, you will be out of my life. I will not tolerate that bullshit drama. I’m not up for it,” he said all nice and calm.

  I was stunned at what he said to me. It took a minute for his words to register in my mind. And his stone-faced expression was intimidating. But I stood my ground.

  “How could you act like I did something to you!” I screamed through more tears. “You were fucking cheating on me in the place I used to work! In front of all my friends and former co-workers!”

  “I thought you were ready to move on,” he replied. “What’s done is done. I don’t want to hear all of this bullshit screaming and crying. I thought fucking with you was gonna be drama free. I thought you were a real woman and could handle a real man. I guess not. I gotta go.”

  His words really cut like a dagger through my fragile heart. I bent over and cried some more. It felt like he had actually stabbed me in the heart. “How could you!” I wailed. I had fallen to my knees again. My legs were too weak to stand.