Two Shades of the Lilac Sunset

by Rosen Trevithick

  The last time anything like this had happened, she’d been nine and her dad had left a bicycle for her in the front garden. Her mum had burst into tears and Willow hadn’t understood why. He’d been around a lot that summer, until one day he turned up swaying and smelling worse than her granddad used to on Christmas Day. Her mum had told him never to come back.

  Willow wondered if this could be the work of her dad. After all, he did come back into her life approximately once every three or four years. It was always the same drill – she’d feel special at first but eventually end up scraping him out of a gutter somewhere, and asking him to leave.

  Still, where would her dad have got the money to buy her an expensive camera? He could barely hold down a job.

  The more options she eliminated, the more likely it seemed that Nat had sent it, but that didn’t make a great deal of sense either; especially after their last encounter. Added to which, she felt sure he’d said he would be going back to London today.

  The one thing of which she was certain was that she couldn’t keep it. There was nobody in her life that she’d feel comfortable accepting an expensive present from, least of all a man she’d only met three times. It might be small change to somebody who could afford a penthouse apartment, but it was a big deal for her.

  Maybe she should phone Nat, but to say – what? ‘Did you send me a camera?’ would sound insane if he hadn’t. But not saying anything would be unforgivable if he had. How she wished Demi was at home so that she could get a second opinion.

  Then she remembered Ross. He was somebody whose opinion would be worth asking. At half ten, she was surprised that Ross wasn’t already awake, but she supposed the life of a freelance, local journalist might lack structure.

  Willow climbed the stairs and listened for signs of life. She couldn’t hear anybody banging around in Demi’s room but she couldn’t hear snoring either. She knocked gently on the door.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, Ross, it’s Willow.”

  “I’m decent. Come in!” he replied in a rich, chirpy voice.

  Willow opened the door and was surprised to find her sister’s mauve room full of daylight. Ross was fully dressed and the bed made. He stood at the window looking out across the town.

  “I love all the houses you can see from here – little boxes on the hillside.”

  “Not made of ticky-tacky I hope?”

  “No. I love them! So many different colours.”

  Willow joined him at the window. She’d always taken the view for granted. Sometimes she fantasised about looking out on countryside or the ocean. It had never occurred to her that buildings could be beautiful too.

  “I’ve tended to live at the bottom of a valley or somewhere tucked away. I love wondering what’s going on in each house, what every family is up to …”

  “Have you seen Nat’s new flat?”

  “Not yet. Have you?”

  Willow felt shy for a moment. “Yes.”

  “I bet it’s incredible – flash wanker!”

  Willow remembered the camera still in its packaging in the kitchen. “Does he like to splash the cash? I mean, have you ever known him to buy something expensive for somebody he’s just met?”

  “What did he get you?”

  Willow led Ross down to the living room. He took one look at the camera and began to drool. “Nikon D4S!” He dropped to the floor and began stroking the camera. “I had a Nikon SLR, backalong – not as fancy as this. Even after the screen cracked, I kept on using it.” He turned the camera upside down, inspecting it. “And Nat gave you this? Man, I wish I was dating Nat.”

  “We’re not dating.”

  “You’re not?”

  “And I don’t know if it was from him.”

  “Is it your birthday?”

  “No, and even if it were, I don’t know anybody who would give me a camera.”

  “Then yeah, it was definitely from him.”

  “But why?”

  “I guess it’s his way of telling you that he likes you. Personally, I can’t see anything wrong with just saying ‘I like you.’”

  “He sent me away! He told me he was bad news.” Willow slumped onto the sofa. “Is he bad news?”

  “He’s Nat Gordon. Everybody loves Nat Gordon.”

  Willow frowned. “But is he bad news?”

  “I don’t really know him that well anymore. We got on okay at school so when he looked me up I was happy to meet. Apart from that …”

  “You hadn’t seen him in the meantime?”

  “Only at the odd wedding. My ex got on well with him, so we had a bit of contact through her.”

  “What do you think I should do about the camera?”

  “What do you want to do?”

  “Give it back.”

  “If you don’t want it, I’ll have it,” joked Ross.

  “I can’t accept something like this. I’m going to go around there and give it back.”

  As Willow packed away the camera, Ross watched in the manner of a man looking at a puppy being taken to the vets for the final time.

  “I thought he was going back to London today,” remarked Ross.

  “He can’t have done, can he? Not if he delivered this.”

  “He hand-delivered it?”

  “Somebody did.”

  Morning of Monday 20 th April – at the Falmouth Hotel

  Willow wasn’t sure where to look first, the Falmouth Hotel or Nat’s apartment. She decided he was unlikely to be at his flat given that it didn’t have any furniture, so went straight to the hotel.

  “I’m looking for Nathaniel Gordon.”

  “He’s just checked out,” the receptionist told her, without needing to look at her records.

  “Thanks.” Willow hurried out the door. She couldn’t let him go back to London without her having the chance to give the camera back.

  She looked around, wishing she knew what Nat’s car looked like. Acting almost on instinct she marched over to a flash yellow Ferrari. The engine was already on. She tapped on the window. Nat looked surprised when he saw her, but he didn’t turn the engine off. He returned his gaze to the dashboard.

  “Hey!” Willow banged on the window again. Why was he determined to ignore her? Only this morning he’d given her a camera. Nat put the car in reverse so Willow rushed around to the back of the car, blocking his way with her body until he had to put the handbrake on.

  Nat jumped out. “What the fuck are you doing? I could have run you over!”

  “I could ask you the same question!”

  “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”

  Willow lifted her canvas shopping bag with the boxed camera in it and thrust it into his arms. “Here, have this back. I don’t want it.”

  “That’s rather rude”

  “And you were just going to drive off, ignoring me! I don’t know what game it is that you’re playing, but I don’t like it.”

  Nat plonked the camera on the top of his six-figure car, as if neither were that valuable to him. “Me playing games?”

  A couple who were walking towards the hotel entrance began staring.

  “Get in the car,” hissed Nat.

  “No!”

  “Let’s not go through that drama again. Get in the car.”

  Willow wasn’t nearly as bothered about arguing in public as he clearly was, but understood that she was unlikely to get a resolution standing in a hotel carpark shouting. She walked around to the passenger side and slumped into the seat. The interior was flash and over the top, just like the rest of the car.

  Without saying a word, Nat turned the engine back on and reversed out of his parking space.

  “Where are we going?” demanded Willow.

  Nat said nothing.

  Willow was relieved when he turned onto the road circling the headland. She knew Pendennis Point like the back of her hand, so if he did plan to axe-murder her, she could keep one step ahead.

  Eventually, Nat pulled up on Pendenni
s Point, choosing the more empty of the two carparks.

  He turned to Willow and spoke in a hushed but angry tone. “What is the meaning of this? You turn up at a hotel where I am respected and start shouting the odds.”

  “I wouldn’t have been shouting if you had responded civilly instead of trying to ignore me.”

  “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t ignore you?”

  “Give me one good reason why you should?”

  “You’re unbelievable.”

  “What am I supposed to have done?”

  “You know what you’ve done.”

  “I really don’t.”

  “Spinning me that crap about being a virgin, making me think I was going to have to wait for sex, when all the time you were screwing my friend.”

  Willow was baffled. “What are you talking about?” She couldn’t imagine what had given him that impression.

  “For God’s sake! You’ve been sprung. Game over.”

  “I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about. I am a virgin. I haven’t slept with anybody.”

  “I saw you!”

  “You saw me have sex?”

  “I saw you at your window, with him!”

  Willow burst into laughter.

  “So you think it’s funny?”

  “Are you talking about Ross?”

  Nat glared but said nothing.

  “Ross is sleeping with my sister.”

  Nat seemed to relax a little, but his hostile expression didn’t change.

  “Demi had to get off to work and left him having a lie in.” Willow sensed that Nat wasn’t going to see the funny side. “Hang on … how did you know he was at our house? Have you been spying on me?”

  “No! After I dropped off that camera I decided to stay and check that you came to the door, in case somebody else pinched it. I was walking away when I looked back and saw Ross at the window.” And suddenly, Nat smiled. “So you’re not sleeping with Ross?”

  “Of course not!”

  “I have never been so pleased to hear that a woman is a virgin.” Nat began to laugh.

  Willow did not.

  “Hey, your face when you saw my parcel was a picture.”

  “Nat, why did you buy me a camera?”

  “Why, because you deserved it, Miss Cassidy. Or rather, because your creations deserve it.”

  “My creations?”

  “Your hats and your quirky dresses. You’re not going to get the following you deserve if you keep photographing them on your phone.”

  “So it’s for my course?”

  “And your career. Call it an investment.”

  “I came here to give it back.”

  “I won’t hear of it. I bought it for you, and you must keep it.”

  “But it’s too much. You barely know me.”

  “It’s proportional to how I feel about you.”

  Willow felt as though she’d been slapped around the face by a winning lottery ticket. “But you keep pushing me away.”

  “That’s what I do. I do it because I care about you. That scares me, Miss Cassidy. You scare me.”

  “I scare you?”

  “I worry that you won’t like me back.” He clutched his steering wheel for comfort, in the manner that a little boy might clutch a teddy.

  “But that’s stupid. I liked you just fine before you started saying I shouldn’t be with you, and then accusing me of sleeping with your friend behind your back.”

  Nat dropped his head against the steering wheel. Eventually, he came up for air, his face red. “Can we start again, Miss Cassidy? Just give me one day to prove to you that I’m worth it. Please say you’ll allow that?”

  “How can we? You’re on your way back to London, aren’t you?”

  “I’m sure I could stretch to one more day. If I go back to London now, I will always wonder what might have been.”

  Evening of Monday 20 th April – on the coast path around Falmouth

  The sunset was lilac again – with light, scattered clouds against a spectrum of blue through to pink. Nat and Willow walked hand in hand along the coastal path, surrounded by campions, buttercups and sea pinks. The overgrown hedges squeezed them into a single track path and Nat look the lead.

  Willow found herself glowing. When Nat relaxed, he was wonderful company. They’d spent the day wandering from beach to beach, grabbing a coffee or ice cream wherever they could. They’d even walked out to Maenporth, the farthest and wildest of the beaches.

  “I knew Falmouth was nice, but with you as my guide, it is magical.”

  Willow simpered.

  “I wish I was moving down tomorrow.”

  “Why don’t you?”

  “I’ve still got to sell my apartment in London and tie up a few loose ends. You know how life is.”

  Willow nodded her understanding.

  “When I get here, I want us to go on a boat trip, somewhere quirky and quaint.”

  “We could go on a sea safari.”

  “A sea safari?”

  “I’ve never been on one, but Demi saw dolphins. Apparently, there can be seals, whales and sharks, too.”

  “Sharks?”

  “Only basking sharks.”

  “I want you to teach me how to surf.”

  “I can’t surf. I’ve always wanted to learn, though.”

  “Then let’s learn together. I’ve heard of somewhere called Perranporth. Can we get there from here?”

  “We’d have to drive, but yes.”

  “Ah, I can drive. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve got a motor.”

  Willow smiled to herself as she thought of his car. It was the only Ferrari she’d ever seen in Cornwall and she felt it would look ridiculous driving past sand dunes and modest souvenir shops.

  “I always dreamt of moving to Cornwall – the slower pace of life, simpler people.”

  “Oi!” Willow prodded him and he began to laugh. Laughter turned to gentle kissing, which turned to deeper kisses …

  They began walking again. Willow felt so heady that she barely registered a middle-aged dog walker until the lady stopped to talk to Nat.

  “Hello Nathaniel, how lovely to see you again.”

  “Mrs Willis!” He greeted her with a high five and she chuckled. He crouched down and started making a fuss of her dog. The young spaniel leapt up with excitement

  “But I thought you went back today.”

  “I decided to stay, to spend the day with this lovely lady.”

  Mrs Willis turned to Willow. “Pleased to meet you.”

  Willow smiled. “Willow.”

  “I’m Jane. I’m the cleaner for the block where he lives. He helped me carry my hoover up all those flights of stairs when the lift broke.”

  “And we’ve been firm friends ever since,” joked Nat.

  The lady giggled like a teenager. Willow got the impression she would have loved for them to swap places.

  “I’ll let you get on,” she said. Then she gave him another high five and carried on along the footpath. The spaniel needed a little encouragement to follow. “You’ve got a friend for life there!”

  Willow hadn’t thought of Nat as a dog person, but then there were many things she didn’t know about him. The one thing she knew for sure was that he was happy, and in turn, she was happy. As they walked back towards Gylly hand in hand, she felt on top of the world.

  She wondered whether she would sleep with him that night. She wasn’t opposed to sex; she’d just never met anybody she wanted to do it with before. Was it really sensible to deny herself sex that she did want, just because there was no precedent?

  The thing that had put her off sex in the past was that it had never felt special. Neither the back of a Fiesta nor a grubby sleeping bag had seemed like ideal locations, and a man who bragged that he’d once slept with twins hardly made her feel important. In contrast, she had never felt as special as she did today.

  Nat cared about her enough to push her away when he feared tha
t he wasn’t good enough for her; he was thoughtful enough to get her a gift that would help with her degree; he’d felt devastated when he believed she was with somebody else. No wonder she was feeling special. She could see that she had really turned his head.

  As they neared the road, Willow began to wonder where they were going. His flat had no furniture, but he’d already checked out of the hotel. Willow suggested, “Would you like to come to mine for a coffee?”

  “I think we’ve had enough coffee for one day.”

  “Oh.”

  “Why don’t we go to my place? We could pick up a bottle of wine from the beach café and watch what’s left of the sunset from there?”

  “That sounds perfect.”

  They stopped to kiss for the umpteenth time, only this time, it was more passionate than ever, laced with the promise of what might be to come. That was the moment when Willow realised she was about to lose her virginity.

  “Let’s skip the wine,” she said, pulling him by the hand and leading him up onto the road.

  Nat stopped her. For an awful moment, she thought it was not what he wanted. Then he seized her, and threw her over his shoulder. “I make the moves.”

  Willow couldn’t get upstairs fast enough. Nat put her back on her feet to unlock the door. They fell over each other getting into the building and again getting into the lift.

  They kissed so passionately in the lift that neither of them even noticed when it stopped on the second floor. An old gentleman in a tweed cap coughed. Nat and Willow left their embrace and tried to remain composed until the man alighted on the third floor.

  Finally, the lift got to the penthouse. Nat unlocked the door. Willow rushed inside after him and attempted to recommence the kiss from the elevator.

  “That’s not how this is going to work,” he said, surprising her with a firm tone. “That is not how I like to do sex.”

  Willow looked confused.

  He brushed her hair from her face. “Miss Cassidy, you are beautiful.” He whispered, “I need to be inside you tonight.”

  She felt her heart thump.