Nicole fisted the sheets with one hand and grabbed his shirt with the other. Her head tossed back and forth and she groaned, her body seeming to roll from the top down. Her breath hitched and her nails scored his flesh.
He brought the power down, surprised she’d orgasmed so fast. But then maybe she was more sensitive now. All the better he fuck her.
She flopped on the bed, watching him through her lashes as he eased the vibrator from her. Didn’t she know how fucking hot she was? She starred in all his fantasies because there wasn’t anything better than her. She was it.
Jake stood and stripped out of his clothes in a rush. He wanted to feel her skin on his.
He climbed back on the bed, straddling her legs and stroking her skin from thigh to stomach, stomach to ribs and to her face. She was totally precious to him, didn’t she know that? Didn’t she know that without her keeping him together, he would have burned out long before?
He slid her panties down her legs, taking his time to kiss and nibble as he went. She was already sensitized from the orgasm, so she wiggled and gasped whenever he hit a tender spot. He tossed the panties in the direction of the rest of the set, his focus totally on her.
Nicole reached for him then, wrapping her arms around his neck. She strained toward his mouth, so he hauled her up until she straddled his thighs, rising above him. The perfect position to worship her breasts. But first he needed her mouth.
She kissed him, digging her hands into his hair and sucking on his lower lip. Her teeth scored him. He loved how she got a little wild in bed, how she liked him to throw her around.
He plumped her breasts and gently kissed the hard nipples, once apiece.
“Jake, fuck me,” she whispered.
Gladly.
Nicole held on to his shoulders as he grasped his cock and notched it against her pussy. She sank onto his length, her nails digging tracks in his shoulders. He groaned as he slid deep. She moaned and rose, the slow drag of flesh on flesh driving him crazy. He grabbed her hips and thrust up into her.
“Oh yes.” She tightened her grip and leaned against his chest until her nipples rubbed his as she rose and sank. Her hips moved even as she pistoned up and down, adding a counteraction to her fucking.
This wildness, the way she lost herself, it was fucking hot.
He slid his hands down to slap her ass, startling a laugh out of her. She grinned at him and swooped down for a kiss, thrusting her tongue into his mouth.
Jake grabbed the vibrator that had rolled toward them and clicked it on. He slid it between them lengthwise so whenever she had his cock inside her, the vibrator hit her clit.
Nicole gasped, her muscles freezing at the first contact. Her jaw dropped and her eyes went unfocused.
Oh yeah.
Jake began to thrust, rubbing his length along the vibrator. It was different and not bad at all.
“Oh yes. Fuck. Do that again.”
He kept thrusting into her welcoming body. At this rate he was going to look like a cat scratching post but he didn’t care. They were her scratches, every damn one of them. And he’d wear them with pride.
“Jake. Oh fuck.” She panted, her eyes dilated and the tendons on the side of her neck stood out. She was damn close.
He thrust harder, the sound of their joining bodies, pants and moans mixing together, weaving a lust-born spell.
Nicole’s grip tightened and she let out a long moan a second before orgasm rolled through him. He rocked against her, the vibrator trapped between them, drawing the climax out until pleasure turned to pain. He buried his face in her shoulder and tossed the vibrator on the floor. She slumped in his hold, panting into his hair.
Jake lay down, cradling her close. His muscles were so worn out he almost dropped her, but managed to get horizontal without incident. He smoothed her hair away from her face and kissed her brow.
He loved this woman so much.
For several minutes they lay entwined, the buzz of the vibrator keeping him from slipping into sleep. Finally he got up on shaky legs and turned it off, carrying it into the bathroom.
He rinsed the vibrator off and cleaned himself up. Nicole followed him a few minutes later, her cheeks pink and a slightly dazed smile on her face. They glanced at each other as they shuffled around, sharing the same intimate space as they had in previous years.
It was easy, friendly even. As if the walls between them were gone, not just cloaked in shadows, waiting for the morning.
He took her hand and led her back to the bed, helping her in and curling in beside her. He cradled her head on his shoulder and squeezed her fingers, content to hold her.
“I miss you,” he said into the darkness.
She grew still for several moments and didn’t reply. Maybe his admission had startled her?
“I miss us,” he added. “The way things were.”
“Me too.” She paused. “I just don’t know if we can get back there.”
“We can try.”
“Then why haven’t we?” She peered up at him and though the darkness masked her features, he knew a world of hurt stared back at him. He’d failed her. There was no other way around the facts and he had to own his mistakes.
“I thought we were. I thought you needed time and space,” he replied.
“I needed you.”
“I know that now. But I didn’t then.”
“I told you I needed you.”
“Yes, but I didn’t know what that meant. Baby, I was just as lost as you were.”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about this right now. I just want to go to sleep.” The watery quality of her voice, the way it broke as she spoke, pierced his heart.
“Okay.” He pulled her against his chest and kissed the crown of her head.
Diego sat in his borrowed car at the end of the street and stared at the SUV sitting in the drive. It was the same standard-issue vehicle most of SWAT drove. He grinned, barely able to contain his glee. Things were going all right for him. Two of his so-called friends were out of commission and now this. His plans were falling into place so well. He couldn’t have anticipated things working out this way. Not in his wildest of dreams.
Jake Vant had returned.
The honey had drawn the bear.
Now to set the trap.
Chapter Seven
Nicole rose slowly to consciousness, but she didn’t want to. It was so warm and pleasant in the darkness. A shiver stole up her spine and she groaned, but something held her in place. The skin on her neck crawled and she tried to twist away from it, but she couldn’t.
She blinked. Most of the room still obscured by darkness, but a little light filtered in through the window, signaling dawn was close at hand. A dark shape loomed over her but she knew the scent. Soap, aftershave and mints.
Jake.
His lips traveled up the side of her throat. His hands caged her, holding her in place, not that she was going anywhere now. Not with his cock against her thigh and his mouth on her cheek.
The memories of sensual sex came back to her and her stomach tied in knots. To have that again—she could have it now.
Nicole hooked her arm around his neck and pulled him down. His weight settled perfectly on top of her, familiar. She wrapped her leg around his thigh and cupped his face. Jake lowered his mouth to hers, allowing her to guide him.
Their lips touched and her inner muscles quivered. She lifted her hips, grinding their sexes together.
Yes!
That was what she wanted.
He left her mouth and kissed her face, her chin and back down her neck. He gently bit the side, his teeth scoring her flesh. She arched up into him, holding him close. She’d have to wear a scarf today. So what?
Fuck her coworkers. With a chainsaw.
That wasn’t what she wanted to think about. Not with Jake with her.
Neither of them wore a stitch of clothing. They’d gone to bed naked, skin on skin, and for that she was now immensely grateful. She reached b
etween their bodies and grasped his hardening cock, stroking the velvety flesh. He hardened further in her hand, ready for the morning’s exercise.
His breath fanned her cheek as she pumped him from root to tip. His hips moved helplessly with her motions, urging her on.
She let go and pushed his shoulders. There was no way she could move him unless he allowed it, and while she did like a good manhandle treatment she wanted something else right now. He’d gotten his way against her wishes and when she was weak. Now she wanted to give him a bit of his own medicine.
He rolled, taking her with him so that she sprawled across his chest. She pushed up, hands planted on his ribs, and straddled his thighs. His cock pressed against her stomach, fully erect.
In the growing light she could make out his features, the glint in his eye and a slight curl of his mouth.
She lifted up and grabbed his cock, positioned it at her entrance and sank down. They groaned as he slid into her slick channel. It wasn’t uncomfortable, not anymore. She fit him like a glove again, and she hadn’t forgotten how to make him come.
Nicole leaned forward, sliding her breasts up his chest, and sank back down on his length. The wiry hairs on his chest tickled her sensitive nipples, adding a whole new level of sensation. She gripped one of his hands, lacing their fingers together, and planted the other on the bed and repeated the move, this time squeezing him with her internal muscles.
“Fuck,” he muttered.
Still got it.
Again and again she stroked his cock, need spiraling through her. He dug his free hand into her hair and moved her faster, urging her on as he began to thrust up to meet her movements. She moaned as warmth unfurled in her belly and held on tighter.
Not yet.
She bent, kissing him, and slid her hands down his chest. He caught her hand before it reached the point where their bodies connected and pushed it to the mattress.
His gaze speared her even in the dimness. He replaced her hand with his, thumbing her clit as she fucked him. She sat up, hands planted on his abs, and tossed her head back.
“Fuck,” he growled. He never lasted as long as he wanted to in the mornings.
He tweaked her clit ever so gently and she gasped as he shoved up into her.
They came as one, groaning and shouting the orgasm as muscles tensed and held, hands squeezed and her small seed of hope blossomed.
She collapsed forward onto his chest, breathing deep while he smoothed her hair back away from her face. After several minutes she rolled to the side. He pressed a quick kiss to her temple before rising and going into the bathroom.
While he moved around in the next room, Nicole lay back, hands laced together over her chest. She evaluated their relationship, trying to put the sudden, intense emotions aside.
The sex was still good. They wanted each other. But would he really be there for her? Could he?
She wanted to say yes but she couldn’t. Not in good faith. Not yet.
Nicole rose and joined Jake, edging past him in the bathroom she’d always complained was too small. In the new house, it was two or three times the size, with a separate closet for the toilet, a shower stall and tub big enough for two Jakes. Here it was a small space but it felt more intimate.
As they finished up in the bathroom, Jake paused in the doorway, tipping her chin up with his knuckle. He studied her but nothing of what he felt telegraphed through. She held her breath and waited for his judgment, the findings of whatever he saw when he looked at her.
“I still love you. Do you know that?” he asked.
Her heart quaked and her knees grew rubbery. “I think so, but it’s different to know you’re loved than to feel it.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.”
Jake wasn’t the kind of man to shy away from apologizing, but his sudden about-face left her reeling. In the last few days he’d said more to her, expressed his feelings and thoughts more than he had all year. It was more than a little disorienting.
“Come on.” He took her hand and flipped off the light, leading her back to bed.
She glanced at the clock and resisted the urge to groan. Her alarm was going to go off in a few minutes, and then this little dreamland would be gone.
Jake pulled her onto the mattress after him and flicked the blankets over her legs. He fished something off the floor and turned on the lamp.
“Is that necessary?” She glared at the light.
“If you want breakfast it is.”
He opened a white baker’s box with a collection of her favorite donuts inside and offered her first pick.
“You fight dirty.” She selected a chocolate donut with a liberal amount of sprinkles and bit into the soft, sugary goodness. “Mmm.”
“I thought you’d like them.” He pulled out a cinnamon twist and tore off bite-sized chunks.
“When did you go get these?”
“Right before I woke you up. I couldn’t sleep. Got off duty and went home and crashed for too long. Sleep schedule’s all screwed up.”
She nodded. It wasn’t unusual. They used to keep one of the guest bedrooms made up for him to use when he wanted to sleep at odd hours and not wake her up. The practice had died at the new house, though at times he’d slept on the couch. He just hadn’t wanted to stay in one of the guest rooms next to the nursery, and she couldn’t blame him.
“How bad was it yesterday?” she asked.
“Not bad. It was a clean sting.”
Nicole left it at that. There were some things she was okay not knowing. The extent of his job was one of them. As long as he came home to her, that was all that mattered. These moments they shared were precious, because as much as she wanted to daydream about a family together, it wasn’t a sure bet. Accidents happened all the time. He could get hurt or killed in the line of duty.
God, I’m thinking like we’re back together already.
“Would it be so bad if you came home and we worked this out together?” he asked, head tilted to the side, slanting his gaze toward her.
The donut seemed to go stale in her mouth. Was this what the sex was about? Fuck her brains out and then reel her in?
She swallowed and placed the half-eaten pastry back in the box.
“We haven’t fixed anything,” she said, studying the comforter.
“I know, but we can.”
“If I come home, then what? We go back to the routine of not talking and ignoring each other?” She shook her head. This wasn’t about changing or fixing things, it was about conquering her and bringing her back to his cave. “No, I’m not going home with you. I’ll stay here.”
“How are we supposed to fix things if you aren’t around?” His tone rose and he dropped the twist back in the box.
So much for the power of donuts.
“We’ve been under the same roof with the same problems and didn’t solve anything. Maybe we can’t glue the pieces back together, Jake. Maybe we’re different shapes now.” She got the words out without crying, without the watery quality in her voice. It hurt. It hurt so bad, like someone was carving her heart out all over again.
“We can, you just have to want us to work.”
“I’ve wanted us to work out, Jake, but you weren’t around. You checked out and left me. All I’m doing is trying to move on. Our marriage has been empty since Willow died, and you won’t even acknowledge it.”
The buzzer on Jake’s phone began to blare. She rolled her eyes. Of course. Saved by the job.
“This isn’t finished.” Jake pushed out of bed, glaring at her.
“Great.” She rolled her eyes and got to her feet, slapping her alarm to prevent it from going off.
She stepped into the walk-in closet to get some space, or more accurately to hide. She sucked in a deep breath and squeezed back the tears. Loving him might not be enough. The sex, however great, was a high price to pay for a few more moments in the arms of the man she loved.
The door opened and Jake stepped in, brows two dark slashes acro
ss his forehead.
She backed up until she hit the wall but he just kept coming. He gently took her chin between his finger and thumb and tilted her face up to him. The creases and the frown didn’t go away but he brushed her cheeks, wiping away tears she hadn’t realized she’d cried.
“I’m not done loving you. Give me a chance to make this right.” He wiped her other cheek and she sniffed, barely holding back the sobs that wanted to rack her body. “I’ll be back. Tonight or in the morning, I’ll be here. Don’t give up on me.”
Jake kissed her forehead, lingering there for a moment before backing out the door.
She watched him go, and when she couldn’t see him anymore, she listened to his footsteps, the close of the door, until she couldn’t discern which sounds were him.
Nicole sank to the ground, pulling her knees up to her chest, and sobbed. She’d thought not feeling was horrible—she’d been wrong. The emotions, the sensation of having her heart ripped out of her chest and all of her nerves tied into knots, this was horrible. She buried her face in her hands and cried, for herself, for the pain, for what might be and what would never be.
* * * * *
Jake hauled his gear into the unisex bathroom in the garage and quickly changed into his uniform. He could still feel Nicole’s fingernails on his skin and even smell her sweat on him.
Today was not the day he wanted to be on duty. Not when his focus was at home, where he’d had to leave his wife crying. Fucking tears. He hated them. Watching her cry tore him apart. He wanted to ram his fist into a wall.
Someone knocked on the door.
“Just a minute,” he called out.
“Dude, we’re waiting on you,” Becca said on the other side of the door.
“I’ll be out in a second,” he snapped, tucking in his shirt.
He rushed through suiting up and opened the door. Becca stood on the other side, hair coiled into a tight bun, one brow lifted.
“What crawled up your ass?” she asked.
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