Everlost (Mer Tales, Book 3)

by Brenda Pandos

  Tatiana laughed coarsely. The King’s words about a foolish son came to mind and she couldn’t agree more.

  “Did you know Nicole and other servants lost their parents to a mining accident when they were only children?” she hissed. “I’m sure these explosions are giving them and all the servants a huge vote of confidence. They’re already afraid to get supplies as it is—”

  Azor puffed his chest forward; his pectoral spikes flared. “All of that is none of your concern, Tatiana.” He smirked. “But if you insist on sticking around, please do so out of view of the rebels. Your presence is confusing.”

  “Confusing?” She perched a brow. “As future queen, I care about all mer: beta, rebel, maimed and the orphaned. And dynamite is dynamite. If the servants are terrorized, who’s going to get your mom her coveted croissants and fresh berry jam?”

  His smile remained. “Maybe she’ll have to eat fish like the rest of her kingdom.”

  “That’s if we have any left in a few days.” Tatiana huffed.

  His eyes hardened into a scowl. “I refuse to argue with you. Your father forfeited everything once he defied the King and I will reopen the gate.”

  “My father did nothing wrong and your actions aren’t fixing the problem. It’s only making it worse! If you’d only listen to your father and stop this before it’s too late!”

  He cocked his head back and snarled. “It’s not up to you. Ever!”

  “Ughhh!” She turned her fin in disgust and kicked her tail toward the compound. She’d expected him to chase after her, or at least call out her name, but he yelled for Jacob instead. Heartbroken, she sped off blindly, leaving them in her sand-filled wake.

  : : :

  Her heart stuttered and mind whirred. She couldn’t return to the compound, not after the sharp-tongued servants sliced her up like sushi. This would only add to the gossip mill, though they’d know soon enough when the explosions didn’t stop. Her words to him were nothing. With another pump of her tail, she turned east and headed for her old house. Maybe in the ruins she could salvage what was left of her stolen life. Maybe there an answer to her problems would arise.

  Upon rounding the last row of mer houses on Percophidae Lane, Tatiana gasped. Unscathed and pristine stood her home, just like she and her mother had left it right before the promising ceremony.

  “That little piranha,” Tatiana mumbled under her breath as she swam in for a closer look.

  The furnishings and familiar smells greeted her with open arms, and she threw off the stinky jacket and spread herself across the floor. She inhaled, bent her knees and wriggled her toes, thankful spiders couldn’t take over like they would in her Tahoe home. At her song of joy leaping off her tongue, a crab skittered across the floor and Tatiana laughed, thinking of Fin—his hated underwater version of spiders.

  Immediately, Tatiana dashed to her room and put on her favorite pink tulle sequin skirt, then hustled to the kitchen and whipped up a batch of vegan pancakes (due to a lack of eggs and milk) and brewed a pot of hot coffee. The delicious smells danced with one another and tickled her nose. She ate with a peaceful smile, the first one in a long time, until a twinge of guilt hit her.

  Though she’d meant every word she’d said to Azor, dread over her delivery took hold. How would they unite a kingdom when they couldn’t even get along? Or sleep in the same bed, for that matter?

  She groaned into her hands. Lies… all he told were lies. He’d promise one thing and do the total opposite, then expect his apology would smooth things over. If she returned to the compound now, he’d win and she’d virtually be in agreement of his poor treatment of her. Why, in spite of his cruelty, did the promise have such an unfair hold on her heart and her actions and not on his? Only briefly would she have moments of clarity, like in the heat of an argument, where she could see what an ass he really was. But then his touch turned her to a spineless jellyfish, addicted to him like a drug. She’d hated him once. She wanted to remember her feelings, use them to help her think clearer. Azor clearly showed there was a way to control oneself, master the art of the promise. What was the secret?

  Maybe distance was the key. What if she hid at her parent’s for a while? Would he finally care? Miss her? Worry to the point, he’d realize his mistreatment of her? There was no reason for him to pursue her parents anymore. Sure, the King suffered because of a chain of events he admitted he started. But hadn’t Azor talked to his dad yet? Asked for advice on how to lead Phaleon’s kingdom, at least? Surely King Phaleon would mention he’d seen Tatiana, that he’d asked her forgiveness, that he no longer wanted to press the issue. Besides, the sharks were Azor’s doing. If they’d been held on the other side, in the Pacific Ocean where they belonged, and not in Natatoria, the King would be ruling today. Azor and Tatiana would be on their promisetide.

  At the thought of a vacation, she closed her eyes and moaned. Fruity drinks and playing tag with the dolphins floated in her mind, along with intimate things only the promised do. If only.

  Ash and Fin drifted in her mind. They’d be at the Florida safe house by now, starting over. Had any of the runaway mers given them an update on what’s happening in Natatoria? Did they care? Ash and Fin would be head over fins in love, and her parents… well, apart for practically a month, they’d be just as bad. And in their minds, they’d probably thought the same of her and Azor—but nothing could be further from the truth. Did they even miss her?

  After how she’d treated them when they’d only wanted to save her, they’d know it wasn’t a good idea to return. And with news Azor might be hot on their tails, they’d never risk coming back anyway. To know they’d accepted her choice and moved on without her hurt. Was this her punishment for wanting to become human? For wanting such a selfish dream?

  She pushed away her half-eaten plate, her appetite ruined. If only she and Fin had successfully escaped when she’d broken him out of Azor’s dungeon. They’d all be together in Florida, preparing to attend Florida Atlantic University with Ash, and peace would have inhabited Natatoria. Everyone would have been so much better off.

  She stared at the time zone clock in the kitchen and bit her lip. Would this be her life? Constant waiting, pining, begging, and fighting? What would happen after she bore a child? Would Azor steal away her son? Warp their sweet merling’s mind to be mean and cruel like he was? She couldn’t bare the thought. And then with the servants watching and gossiping, bets on how she’d handle the responsibility, handle the stress, handle the throne.

  No.

  Then the solution crossed her mind, an escape from all the madness. She could simply leave. She already knew where her family was. Once in Florida, her parents could convert her and she’d forget everything, all the blame, madness, treachery—that is if they forgave her. The thought thrilled and sickened her.

  At the plan, her eyes drifted to her mother’s waterproof bag tucked neatly in the rock cabinet over the lava stove. She didn’t need anything for the trip—only the heirlooms that were special to her family. Her gut tightened and twisted, the thought of leaving Azor exhausting. Though life under the sea had proven to be nothing but heartbreaking, could she honestly go through with it and leave him?

  Before she could chicken out, she grabbed her cup of coffee and moved to her room to pack her things, one of which was Little Women. At the thought of Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy, she missed Ash, her best friend and sister-in-mer; her heart pounded faster. She packed her journals, her paints, and cookbooks. The growing, intense fear screamed from her soul, squeezing her chest and inflicting her with dread. She continued on, blaming Azor. His pigheadedness was the reason she was leaving. Maybe now he’d finally understand how serious her threats were. A lifetime of loneliness seemed a fitting punishment.

  Like a small hurricane, she whizzed through her room, scooping up bikini tops and skirts from her closet, when her beloved pink sparkly bag flopped to the floor. Inside was a collection of memories she’d made with Ash. As she clutched the purse to her chest, she vowe
d she was making the right choice. This and the rest of her belongings could only be enjoyed on land—with the wind in her hair, the sun on her face, and the sand between her toes. Freedom. A life of her own.

  She stuffed the pink purse into the waterproof bag and lugged it to the porthole. With a soft thud, the bag hit the floor. Tatiana took a deep breath and stared at the shimmering water.

  What are you doing?

  She teetered, the task daunting. Could she leave? Would she leave? Maybe all Azor needed was a few hours. Yes, that would wise him up. She just needed to wait him out. He’d eventually come looking for her and be sorry. Wait it out. Win.

  She sat on the couch, her bag in her fingers, and pulled her feet up. She’d prove a point. This time, she’d be stronger than the promise. Had to be.

  17

  : : :

  Too Late

  Frantic, adrenaline pulsed down Jacob’s fin as he swung his tail, cursing at himself for insisting she wore the scent-covering cape. If Tatiana wasn’t at her parents’ house, he didn’t know what he’d do. Escape, too. Or die trying.

  He’d watched her vanish over the dunes toward the compound, but she’d never arrived. She’d been missing a day. An entire day and no one, not even the rebels, had seen her. Did she get mad enough to run? Did she somehow get past the Dradux and the cassava drenched nets and escape out of a gate? The thought of Tatiana in the hands of the Dradux, especially Darrellon, made him want to punch something. Poseidon help anyone that dared touch her.

  Secretly, he hoped she’d escaped to Florida. He knew about the safe house and figured Tatiana did too, but with the iridescent hooded cape covering her scent, he couldn’t track her. And before he left Natatoria, he’d need to be certain she’d left. There was no coming back.

  He hadn’t thought until now to check her parents’ house. Rumor was the crystal ball had damaged the home and others beyond repair. At this point, he’d check anywhere. And like a singing beacon, Jack and Maggie’s house stood at the end of the lane—untouched. He darted up the porthole, took in the sight of Tatiana on the couch, and practically passed out on the floor in front of her.

  “Princess? Thank Poseidon you’re safe.” Lying on his back, his chest rose and lowered from his breaths. “I’ve looked everywhere. You don’t know how terrified…”

  Jacob’s eyes glazed over before he closed them slowly, thanking the heavens above, then he cursed them. She’d stayed in Natatoria—wild and frantic like a dying fish—for Azor. He scolded himself for his over-protectiveness in insisting she wear the cape. His eyes scanned the floor and saw her bag near the porthole.

  Bag? Had she intended to leave?

  Jacob quirked his head, imploring. “Why didn’t you return to the compound?”

  “I—uh.” Her mouth moved, but she said nothing further.

  Rocking on her seat with unfocused eyes, she tightly wrapped her arms around her legs. Everything inside him wanted to pull her into his chest, nuzzle his nose in her hair, and whisper everything would be okay. She’d packed, but didn’t leave? Why? Was this only a stunt to get Azor’s attention? Jacob closed his eyes in remorse. The fool had barely cared she’d left. He didn’t even form a search party.

  Jacob knelt before her. “Princess, please. Don’t ever disappear like that again. I must know where you are at all times. There are those who’d want nothing more than to harm you, do you understand?”

  At the mention of hostile mers, Tatiana snapped out of her stupor and laughed. “Like the King?”

  Jacob inhaled and blinked slowly, remembering the horrible incident.

  “Yes…” Though the peaceful nature of the mer had been tested, Jacob didn’t think anyone was desperate enough to ransom Tatiana for freedom of their jailed mate. But the guards—especially the Dradux—would cop a feel or attempt a lick just for bragging rights.

  “I know everyone hates me. They think I’m a spoiled brat and undeserving of the Prince’s affection… but to harm me? Who’d be so cruel and hateful?” She glared at his arm, the place where she’d bitten him. A chill ran across his spine, remembering that day. She sucked in a tortured breath. “Your rebels? As revenge for my father abandoning them?”

  “No… they care for you, Princess, just like they care for your father.”

  “Of course you’d say that.” Tatiana recoiled further onto the couch. Her eyes sparked, accusing. “Where is my mate anyway? Is he even looking for me?”

  Jacob’s chest flexed. After Azor found out she was missing, he called off Jacob’s search party. He’d told everyone he didn’t want to give attention to her tantrum, calling her a spoiled merling in front of the guards and servants, that she’d come home and beg for forgiveness eventually.

  “No. Azor isn’t looking for you. He thinks you’re throwing a tantrum.”

  Tatiana blinked, disbelieving. “What?” Tears suddenly trailed her cheeks.

  Jacob cringed, wishing he’d been less direct. Her eyes, puffy and swollen, told him she’d been crying and most likely lay awake all night. He inched closer, offering his palm. She glared into him with frustrated helplessness.

  He looked deeply into her eyes. “You don’t have to put up with this, with him.”

  “And then what? Leave?” Her lip quivered.

  Jacob gestured to the bag. “Looks like you’d already planned to do so.”

  “How could I leave, Jacob?” She laughed coarsely. “I can’t even last a night without freaking out.”

  “You can do it, Tatiana. I believe in you. You’re strong.”

  She pressed her eyelids shut and shook her head. “How do you know that? You don’t even know me.”

  Jacob smiled. “Did I tell you I was with your father on the mission? He told me about a girl who was incredibly smart, who wouldn’t let anything stand in the way of her dreams. Of her bravery and desire for truth. One who loved people and was a friend to all.” He leaned in “The only thing he forgot to mention was how beautiful you are.”

  Tatiana’s eyes popped open, her cheeks growing pink. “Don’t say that.”

  “Why not?”

  Tatiana stuttered. “Because it’s not true, and…” She gulped down a sob. “My father would be horribly disappointed in me. He probably hates me.”

  Jacob sighed. “No, Princess. He’s planning to come back for you.”

  “What?” Her chest heaved.

  “He doesn’t want you here, dealing with a tyrant who isn’t even capable of love.”

  “Wh—?”

  “Don’t deny it.” Jacob gritted his teeth. “I’ve watched how he treats you. Like a possession. He’s using you, Tatiana. You’re a pawn in his game. His mission is to find Jack and punish him by beheading him in the square. He’s increased his guard, arresting beta-mers, and using illegal poisons. And he’s planning his coronation, even though you haven’t given him a…” He looked away, disgusted.

  Her breath came out quick. “No.”

  “But you can get away. Leave him. Leave this. I can take you to Florida. I know where the safe house is. Then we can tell your dad about everything.”

  She gasped and their eyes met. A fire crackled between them—one of loyalty, of understanding, of unity, of purpose. He’d gotten through to her, finally. He rose, and held out his hand, ready to go. Ready to leave.

  As she reached for him, his mind raced with his plan. Dorian still had control of the Scotland gate, and since the distance took hours to traverse, even at merlightning speed, and Azor hadn’t paid much attention in securing it, they should be able to escape undetected. The cape would cover both their scents, leaving no trail, and once in Loch Ness, they could backtrack to Florida. They’d be free.

  His hand wrapped around her slender fingers, sending a bolt of desire through his body. At her trembling, he knew she’d been fighting her growing feelings for him, too. He’d seen how she’d looked at him, reacted to his touch in the past. The heat between them was undeniable and with Azor’s absence, Jacob could break the promise spell an
d heal her broken soul until she wanted to kiss him.

  She pushed to her feet, hope in her eyes. Jacob stared at her lips, wishing she’d ask him now. He’d kiss her. He’d treasure her forever.

  Her tongue darted out, licking her lips, when her mouth curled into a frown. She dropped his hand. “You’re lying to me, Jacob. This can’t be true.”

  “What?” Jacob’s face grew pained. “No, Princess. It’s all true. The last thing I want to do is manipulate you. Your safety is my only priority.”

  “Right,” she sneered. “Your only priority? You’ve made your position pretty clear. And if my father is coming to attack, he’ll take Azor out. He’ll murder him. How is that any better?”

  Jacob gritted his teeth. “Princess, listen to yourself. Must I remind you how Azor treats you? He doesn’t even care enough to come find you.”

  “He’s busy,” she said, throwing her shoulders back. “And all you’ve ever wanted was to take me from Azor anyway. My place is here, with him.”

  At her refusal, he wanted to tell her the truth, that it wasn’t just his loyalty to her father that fueled him. He’d become attached to her, grown to care for her deeply, and Azor’s mistreatment was driving him mad.

  She thrust out her jaw, speaking between her teeth. “He may not be the man I dreamt of being with my entire life, but I won’t let my father hurt him.”

  Jacob rubbed the back of his neck, working to keep his cool. How could she still, after everything, defend this asshole? “Please, Tatiana—”

  A loud exhale at the porthole interrupted Jacob.

  “Tatiana,” Azor said, breathless. “There you are.”

  And in one small turn of her head, Jacob watched her expression change. Tears trickled down her cheeks as her body wobbled forward, arms limply outstretched.

  “I knew you’d come for me,” she whispered.