by Dior, London
Wise
“Daddy, I’m bored.” Melanie sighed, plopping down next to me. I looked at her and smiled. My daughter was gorgeous, just like her mother. She had my eyes and nose, but everything else was all Milan. “Are you gone leave me here with Sasha, again?” She rolled her eyes.
Damn, she was feisty just like Milan’s ass too. This shit was hard. I told Milan to leave me alone, but I didn’t want that shit. I wanted her so fucking bad, but she played too many games.
“Why you say it like that?” I chuckled. The older Melanie got, the more her and Sasha bumped heads. “You better stop doing Sasha like that. She loves you.”
“No she don’t.” Melanie shook her head. “She be trying to whoop me for everything! I can’t do nothing!”
I instantly caught an attitude. Sasha knew that I didn’t play about my fucking daughter. She didn’t have no business putting her hands on her.
“I’m gone talk to her baby. Daddy don’t like that.” I told Melanie, taking my hand and ruffling her hair. Sasha just didn’t know, I’d drop her ass with the quickness and not think twice.
“Can you just drop me off over my granny’s house. I don’t want you to talk to Sasha. She gon’ be meaner”
I promised Melanie that I wouldn’t say anything, then I told her to get dressed so I could drop her off to my mother. As I watched her scurry off, my face instantly tightened. Sasha and had agreed that she wouldn’t discipline Melanie physically. She was supposed to come to me if there was an issue and I would handle it from there. I knew that Melanie could be a bit much at times, but I knew how to deal with her as well.
Fuck keeping quiet, I was planning on going the fuck off on Sasha. The only reason she was around was to help with Melanie. What the fuck did I need her for if she wasn’t treating my baby right? Times like this made me hate Milan’s selfish ass. I saw the way that she treated her other kids and my daughter deserved that same motherly love too.
That’s why I had been pressuring her to get her shit together and realize I was that nigga for her lately. When punk ass Jabari was locked up, we was together damn near every day. That shit was amazing. She had my heart in a choke hold, and I’d do anything to wake up to her every morning again. I knew that I fucked up, but how long was she going to punish me… I mean punish us? Our daughter was suffering too. Melanie thought that Milan was her auntie and she loved her. I was just getting used to having my family complete again. Then Jabari brought his snitch bitch ass home, fucking it all up.
I let out a sigh, as my phone began to vibrate. It was Keem calling and I already knew what it was about. He probably wanted to talk about the whole Jabari situation, but it wasn’t shit to talk about. That nigga had to go!
I didn’t answer my phone, instead I made it to the room where Sasha was laid up watching a re-run of Love and Hip Hop. “Hey baby.” She smiled.
“So you be hitting my fucking daughter?” I asked, getting straight to the point. When I met her a few years ago, her and Melanie instantly clicked, and that’s what drew me to her. Now, things seemed so forced. Ever since Milan and I started hanging around each other again, I haven’t been able to look at Sasha the same. She wanted us to be committed like a married couple, yet I couldn’t see myself being with her for the next six months. Things had gotten that bad.
She got to stuttering. “Na…Naw. Why would you say that?”
She sounded guilty as hell. “So, Melanie making shit up, huh? You should already know not to ever put yo’ hands on that little girl.” I yelled, pointing towards Melanie’s room.
“Wise, she is over exaggerating. I may have popped her when she was being hardheaded. But don’t try to make it seem like I beat your daughter. I do more for her than that bitch that’s supposed to be her mother ever does. Don’t think that I don’t see the way that y’all look at each other.” She snarled, referring to Milan. I hated that I even slipped up and told Sasha that Milan was Melanie’s biological mother. She always found a way to bring her name up.
“This ain’t about what you do. If you can’t keep yo’ hands off of my daughter then get the fuck on!”
Sasha looked hurt. She jumped out of the bed. “You know what? Fuck you Wise. You’re not about to keep using me just to take care of your spoiled brat. I ‘m done with this disaster.” She fussed, grabbing her luggage and throwing clothes into the bag. I watched as she packed, not trying to stop her. Fuck Sasha!
I thought about the argument I had with Milan earlier. She was going to have to step her shit up and be a mother to Melanie. I couldn’t keep making everything convenient for Milan, while I was over here miserable as fuck.
***
Milan
After hanging up with Wise, I felt like shit. Melanie was on my mind heavy lately, and it didn’t help that Wise threw it in my face that I was basically a bad mother to her. I thought back to the day that I found out that I was pregnant. Wise and I had just gotten into it about one of his random broads that didn’t know how to stay in her place. I was living with him and she showed up. I tried to tear her ass up. Later that night, my stomach got to cramping so bad that I could barely stand up. Wise ended up rushing me to the hospital, where they told me that I was pregnant. I was devastated. Wise and I needed a baby no more than we needed a hole in our head.
Then, there was the day that we had broken up. I caught him cheating with yet another broad, only I actually saw it with my own two eyes. That shattered my soul. My father was just murdered by some dumb nigga that decided he wanted to rob him, while my mother turned to alcohol to cope with the pain. He knew how much pain I was in and he decided to cause me more grief.
I looked up and tears were falling from my face. That was such a dark time in my life. I shook my head to shake away the thoughts. Then I called Chanel, deciding that I didn’t need to be around the kids all depressed.
Just as I was about to dial her number, Wise’s phone number flashed across my screen. I quickly answered it, hoping that he had calmed down.
“Where you at?” He spoke into the phone, not giving me a chance to say hello.
“On my way to my mother’s house. But, listen. I apologize about everything. You shou,”
“I don’t want to talk about all that, Milan.” He cut me off. “What do you plan to do about Melanie? I’m done worrying about your feelings. It ain’t no point in keeping her a secret no more. Yo’ ass is more than able to take care of yo’ daughter.”
“I know, Wise. Just give me time to sort through the bullshit.” I pleaded. My head was too messed up at the moment, especially with Jabari tripping. Telling everyone that Melanie was my daughter would be a disaster.
“Nah, your time is up.” Wise shot, hanging up. I just let out a sigh. I was so sick of the drama!
I decided to go to my mother’s house to lay down. I was emotionally drained. Wise was tripping, Jabari was tripping, I needed to just disappear.
I drove in complete silence for the whole ride to my mother’s house. There was no radio, no phone, or nothing to distract my attention; just me and my thoughts. I prayed that everything would fall back into order. I wished that Jabari would get his shit together, if not for me, then for the kids. We were done, but I still needed him to man up for the babies.
I was twenty minutes out, and when I pulled into the driveway, my heart got to racing. Wise and the kids were standing in the driveway with my mother, and the look of disappointment in her eyes made my heart drop. He had to have told her about Melanie and that was so wrong on his part.
I ran my hand across my face and let out a groan. Wise said that my time was up, but I didn’t think he meant this fucking fast. I don’t have time to deal with this shit, I mumbled, looking away from the daggers that my mother was shooting me. I knew that she was going to go the hell off on me about Melanie.
“Yeah, don’t be walking slow. Get over here lil’ girl.” My mother yelled at me like I was a child again. I looked to Wise, but his cocky ass just looked away.
“Oooohhh, aunt
ie Milan gone get in trouble!” Melanie chuckled with her little dimple on her left cheek poking out.
“She sure is.” Wise said, antagonizing me. “Now get Jabari Jr. and Kayla, and take them in the house, Melanie. Mrs. Smith got the Disney channel.”
“Man, why I got to take them. They just gone be messing with me. Come on little babies.” She sassed, reminding me of myself. I never realized how much all three of my babies looked alike.
Wise waited until the kids disappeared into the house, then he turned to me. “Don’t you got something to tell yo’ momma?”
I rolled my eyes and focused on my mother, trying to form the words to explain the whole situation to her. She had to understand, when I had Melanie, she wasn’t there for me. It was during the time that my father was murdered and she was two snaps from going crazy. She took my father’s death really hard. Drinking became her solitude, and she wasted a lot of time getting drunk, which drove a wedge between us. Shortly after the baby’s birth. I completely got rid of Wise, and Jabari found his way into my life. Hell, my mother didn’t get her life together until my step dad took her under his wing and they started to go to church.
“No, she doesn’t have to tell me anything. It’s obvious. How could you keep a baby from me? How could you deprive me of my grandbaby?” She looked hurt. I could see the sadness in her eyes.
“Mom, things were complicated.”
“Not that damn complicated! That little girl just called you auntie, which means that she doesn’t even know that she’s your daughter!” She was now yelling.
“Ma! You don’t even know. You was so busy getting drunk and ignoring me that you didn’t realize I was even pregnant. I needed you, you know how close I was to daddy! But I had to depend on Wise!” I shouted back getting choked up.
“Stop making excuses, Milan. I would have helped with my grandchild.” She began to sniffle. “Was I that bad that you couldn’t depend on me?”
I nodded. “Ma. Sometimes I wanted to die. I was so alone.”
“Nah, don’t tell that lie. You always had me.” Wise spoke up, and I waved him off with the quickness.
“Wise please! Me and every other broad in the streets had you! I can’t believe that you brought this to my mother.”
My mother kissed her teeth. “If not now, then when were you going to bring it to me, Milan? Are you even in her life?”
I looked at Wise. I wanted to know what he had to say.
“Yeah, she around. But I can’t raise no girl. She need y’all.” He stepped closer to me. “And I need you, Milan. This my last time reaching out to you and I’m doing it in front of your momma. I want us. I want the family thing and all.”
Before I could speak, Melanie came back outside. “Daddy can we go to Granny house now? The babies keep bothering me.”
My mother studied Melanie and my mouth went dry. Hell yeah I wanted the happily ever after with Wise. But nothing was ever easy for me.
Wise never took his eyes off of me as he answered her. “We are at your granny’s house Princess.”
Chapter Ten
Wise
Melanie got to shaking her head. “Nooooo, I’m talking about my real Granny!”
Mrs. Smith stepped forward and took Melanie’s hands, staring at her with tears. Melanie gave her this crazy ass look. I had to shake my head. I think she gets that blunt shit from me.
“Melanie, Mrs. Smith is your Grandmother too, and…”
“Unt uhh! Then why I never saw her before?” Melanie cut me off, and I looked to Milan to speak. She had the floor, it was time for her to explain to her daughter what was going on.
Milan signaled for Melanie to come to her. “Come here baby.” Mrs. Smith let Melanie go and watched as she walked over to Milan.
“Melanie, baby…” Milan looked at me as tears slid down her face. “Gosh, this is hard.”
“Man, let’s just tell her so that we can get this over with. No more secrets Milan. We gone make this shit right and move on.” I coached her, ready to get the elephant out the room and move forward.
Milan sighed. “Melanie, I love you so much. And you probably don’t understand right now, but she is your Grandmother, and I…I… I’m your mother.”
Melanie put her hands on her hip. “How, you my momma and I don’t live with you and Jabari Jr. and Kayla do? Auntie Milan, why you tricking me?”
“I’m not tricking you, baby. I wanted you to stay with me, but I had so much going on with me. I love you and I promise to be the best mommy ever from here on out.”
Melanie squinted her eyes at Milan and brought her weight to one leg. “Oh… my… God. So that mean that baby Kayla and Jabari is my brother and sister? And they gone be bugging me all the time?” She looked to me. “Daddy, I’m not sharing my toys with those babies. They gone break ‘em.”
I chuckled. Her ten year-old ass was a mess. “Don’t be like that Melanie.”
“For real, for real. I’m not. But wait, does that mean that you not my daddy and Jabari and Kayla daddy is my daddy?”
“Hell naw!!” I didn’t mean for it to come out so harsh. But I felt that her lil’ ass just cussed at me.
“Ok daddy. So this means that Auntie Milan, I mean my mommy gone come stay with us and we can kick Sasha out?”
“We’ll see baby. Can you go in the house and bug your granny right quick. Let me talk to Auntie…”
“Nooo daddy. Didn’t you just say she my momma?”
“Girl get yo’ little butt in the house.” I laughed, watching as they disappeared.
When they were out of sight, I pulled Milan into my arms. “So what you gone do? I’m not asking you no more. Are we gone do this? You know damn well that Jabari ain’t where yo’ heart at. I got you baby, just let me in man. You know I love you and those babies. You got a nigga begging and that’s not even me.”
Milan nodded her head yes. “I want us. But Jabari is not going to let us. He’s talking about doing some crazy stuff to you, and I’m scared because I don’t want to see neither of y’all get hurt.”
Some crazy shit? My eyebrows furrowed. I wondered what the fuck Milan was talking about. This was only further confirmation that I had to kill that nigga!
***
Milan
Melanie and the kids ended up staying at my mother’s house because she wanted to bond with her granddaughter. I didn’t mind because it gave Wise and I time to sort things out. I rode back to his house with him and we were now chilling in his living room.
Jabari had been blowing up my phone and I knew that I had to answer his call. I let out a breath of air as I pressed talk. “What Jabari?” I answered.
“Where the fuck are you at with my kids?” Jabari’s voice blasted through my speaker. I pulled the phone away from my ear because he was so loud. I knew that he was going to be pissed, and that he wasn’t going to take me leaving him too lightly. However, I couldn’t keep subjecting myself to the drama that being with him brought. He was destroying me, and he had turned me into someone that I didn’t recognize.
“I’m leaving you, Jabari. I can’t do this anymore.” I blurted out, getting it over with. Wise was sitting across from me on the couch, pretending to watch the game. He wasn’t fooling nobody, though. He was listening to our conversation.
“You can’t do what? I know you ain’t tripping off that girl and that baby. I don’t want her ass, Milan. I fucked up. I thought we said this shit was forever.”
I let out a sigh. He always seemed to think that his “I’m sorry” excused all of the fucked up things that he did to me. “No, Jabari. You’re ‘I’m sorry’ is a little too late. I can’t do it.”
There was a long pause before he finally spoke again. “Alright, well are you gone at least help me do that? We both will be set for a minute.”
I couldn’t believe that he was still asking me to set Wise up. “No! I’m not doing that shit! Will you please leave that alone? We have kids to think about, Jabari. And what did Wise ever do to you?”
Wise stood up when I mentioned his name, and I pleaded with my eyes for him not to say anything.
“FUCK THAT NIGGA!” Jabari boomed. “Why the fuck you always trying to take up for him? Are you fucking him?”
“No I’m not Ja…”
“Fuck it, just bring my kids to see me. Can I at least see my kids.” He cut me off.
With the new side that Jabari was showing me, I was scared to bring my kids around him. He needed to calm door and get his mind right. His crazy ass would probably try to hurt all three of us.
“I’ll try to get them to you but,”
“Man, why the fuck you pacifying that man.” Wise boomed, coming toward me. He snatched the phone from my hands and pressed it to his ear. “Hell nah you can’t see these kids. And if you want to start a fucking war, nigga I hope you ready.” With that, Wise hung up, throwing my phone on the couch.
He looked at me. “I hope you ready for what’s about to happen, Milan. That nigga working off desperation, so he ain’t thinking right. It’s either me or him, and it for damn sure ain’t gone be me!”
I looked at the chipped paint on my nails, and began to cry. I hated the both of them for making me have to choose.
“Man, come here.” Wise demanded, staring at me with those coal black eyes. I just sat there, not wanting to move. This whole situation was crazy. “I said bring yo’ ass over here, Milan.” His voice was more stern, causing me to reluctantly peel myself from where I sat and make my way over to where he stood.
He gripped me up in his arms when I got close enough, and pulled my chin up to face him. “I love you, Milan. I never stopped loving you, and believe me, I tried. I would never want to put you in a fucked up situation, but that nigga made it this way.”
I nodded, “I love you too, Wise. I just wish that, for the kid’s sake, this could be resolved without anyone getting hurt. My kids adore their father just as much as Melanie loves you.”
His eyes softened, and he looked away, as if he was contemplating something. His arms around me were so comforting. I felt at home again. “Damn, Milan. Put yourself in my shoes though.”