Bats in the Belfry

by S C Jones

  He pointed the gun at him narrowing his eyes. “Don’t forget who’s in charge here, Cas.”

  Cas sneered at him. “How can I when you pull shit like this to try to keep me in line.”

  “The girl is a liability, and she cannot walk free knowing what she knows and you fucking know it, Cas. You’re in as deep as I am. You keep her from me and I’ll find you both and kill you both. I am not going down for your stupid mistake. Is that what you want?” he yelled. Cas’s fury went beyond anything in that moment, and he couldn’t keep standing there debating back and forth with a man he desperately wanted to see dead. He knew his father wouldn’t listen, but he couldn’t stop him, not yet at least. Pinning him with a blank steer he walked past them both straight out the door. It took everything in him not to turn back and kill them both like he was supposed to, but instead he kept walking knowing the time would soon come where there would be no hesitation on either’s part.

  Landing on the sidewalk he didn’t see her, was glad he didn’t, but still he needed to find her. Walking to his car parked inches away, he got in and started the engine, speeding off in the direction of the hotel. He needed to find her, to protect her like he should have done years ago. He hated the fact that it was his fault she was in this mess, which was why he needed to fix it, and why he had to learn the truth about who she really was.

  Twenty-Six

  Two months later…

  “It’s been another week, Olivia. When are you finally going to talk to me again?”

  “I don’t see why you want to talk to me so much. I’m not the crazy one,” said Olivia crossing her arms over her chest with a defiant expression.

  Doctor Collins nodded, writing short notes in her notebook. Olivia wondered if the woman ever actually wrote anything important. Her hand moved so quickly over the page, all Olivia saw was scribbles, scribbles, scribbles. “You say you’re not crazy, but yet you are a part of her as she is a part of you.”

  “Not true." She pointed. "She did this all on her own. I would never have let any of you people get me in here.”

  “But now that you are, we have to get you well again so you can leave, or do you want to end up like your father,” she said giving her a pointed look.

  Olivia looked at her blinking for a moment before sighing and getting comfortable on the couch. “Fine, let’s talk.” She knew the doctor was right. They needed to be fixed to get out of this place, even if it did mean one of them wouldn’t exist in the end.

  Doctor Carleen Collins was one of the therapist assigned to the hospital. She had first met Lane a month ago, on the day she came in and had to be sedated. She talked to her two days later and got a pretty good assessment of her personality. Then two days later when they met again, she soon realized that the girl she had met before wasn’t the same girl sitting in front of her. When Olivia explained that she wasn’t in fact Lane, Doctor Collins fully grasped the severity of the situation at hand.

  Martha had explained the incident from start to finish, had explained that her father was schizophrenic and that there was a possibility that she was too. The signs and symptoms all pointed in that direction and since schizophrenia ran within families the possibility could be true. The thing the doctor couldn’t quite figure out, was how she could be schizophrenic, and have multiple personality disorder at the same time. You either had one or the other never both. And the icing on the cake, only one of the personalities knew the other existed. It was a baffling case, one she found full joy in trying to figure out. “Good. Let’s start at the beginning then, but first I need to talk to Lane. She needs to understand what’s going on.”

  “Fine by me, you know how to reach me." She closed her eyes and a second later.

  “Doctor Collins?” Lane said surprised, looking around the office. “How did I get here?” The last two months since Dr. Collins had been working with the girls, she figured out a way to make the switch happen a lot easier. Olivia didn't notice at first, but all the power was in her hands. All she had to do was concentrate, and take control.

  “You, don’t remember?”

  “No…I remember waking up and sitting in the social room with that girl from the room next to mine, but not coming here.”

  “You just came in,” she assured crossing her legs. “We talked a little, nothing serious. How are you feeling today?”

  “Like I’ve felt every day for the last two months, crazy and disoriented. I don’t belong here, but none of you can see that.”

  “And why do you think we’re keeping you here?”

  “Because I finally broke down, but if you knew the kind of week I had you would understand,” she justified letting her head fall back on the couch.

  “What happened?”

  “That’s not quite something I want to relive, if you don’t mind,” she mumbled keeping her head still.

  “Okay, we’ll come back to that. As for now, I want to talk about your mother. Do you remember her?”

  “Why do you want to talk about my mother?” she asked lifting her head confused.

  “Well, in order to get to the root of the problem, I need to start at the beginning, weed my way through all the fallen leaves and dirt, in order to pinpoint where the problem started.” She did this often. Dug into the past to know more about the individual’s life. Although she already knew the particulars to what she wanted to know, she needed a different standpoint, from eyes she wasn’t sure were there at all. “So, your mother.”

  Lane fiddled with her hand in her lap. Since being here she had developed a tendency where whenever she didn't want to talk about something, she would rub her arms until they burned. “I— don’t remember much, only bits and pieces. I know what she looked like from the pictures; I know what her name is from it being called by my father. Other than that, I was too young to remember anything substantial about her.”

  Dr Collins nodded. “Okay, you can’t tell me much from when she was alive, but you should be able to remember how she died.”

  She frowned. “Why would I remember that?”

  “Because, you were there when it happened.”

  She stopped rubbing. “I was?”

  “You don’t remember that?” she mumbled shaking her head looking at the doctor unsure of how to feel.

  The doctor unfolded her leg and switched to the other, writing a few words in her notebook before looking back at Lane. “From what I was told your mother picked you and your brother up from school. You stopped by Newman's Pharmacy next to Beans coffee house on third before heading home." She paused, eyeing Lane hoping for some kind of recognition on her part, but there was nothing. Lane listened as if hearing this story for the first time.

  When Olivia had told Dr. Collins the story days before, she cried as she told it. Olivia said she felt like she was back there, four years old watching it all happen again. It was as if a part of her world had crumbled when she watched everything around her dissolve into nothing. Lane sat there listening tentatively, her face a blank canvas of no emotion, because she couldn’t remember that day, because it wasn’t her day to remember.

  She continued. “On the drive home, she hit something that blew out a tire, which caused her to swerve into the other lane, hitting another before her car flipped."

  Lane blinked wide eyed; mouth slightly opened before looking down at her hands. “Why can’t I remember that?"

  Dr Collins shrugged leaning back in silence for a moment. "Let's talk about the day of the funeral."

  "Why?"

  "Because I want to know what you remember about that day."

  Lane's face twisted allowing her annoyed gaze to meet hers. "It was a funeral, it was sad. What else is there to know?"

  "Talk to me about your brother. Where was he?"

  She shrugged. "I don't know, around somewhere. Tristan was never good with things like that. He would usually hide until it was over."

  "So, during the service you never saw him?"

  "I did, but only briefly. He was standing nea
r the casket during the viewing and then he ran off."

  Dr Collins locked her lips, pushing her glasses up her nose. "Lane, I need you to close your eyes for a moment. I need you to go back to that day."

  She shook her head frantically. "I—I don't want to. I don't see wh—"

  "I need you too see something and the only way to do that is to close your eyes and concentrate. You want to be better, right? To go home and live a healthy life?"

  Lane paused eyeing her before nodding. Placing her head back she closed her eyes and exhaled. "Okay."

  "Good, now take a few deep breaths in and out. Clear your head and focus solely on that day." Dr Collins reached over to the small table on her side and flicked the pin of the metronome, allowing the silent room to now be engulfed in the rhythmic ticking sound. "Lane are you there?"

  "Yes," she mumbled softly slowly drifting into her head. The sound was meant to give her focus. Something to hold onto while feeling lost in all those emotions she was about to crawl through.

  "Good. Listen to the tics, and start counting from one to ten."

  Lane remained silent.

  "Lane."

  "Yes."

  "Listen to the ticks, and start counting from one to ten."

  "One, Two, Three—"

  When Lane got to ten, Dr Collins studied Lane who sat still with her eyes closed. "Now we're going back to the day of your mother's funeral. Walk me through it. Tell me where you begun."

  "I was standing at the doors of the church," she said in monotone. "My father was holding my hand when he pushed the door opened and walked us inside. I remember looking at all the sad faces, people holding onto each other trying to help one another carry their grief."

  "What happened next?"

  "My father stepped away for a moment, moving to talk to some people in the back of the church. His eyes were red, and swollen, and this lady kept hugging him trying to give him comfort. I was standing in the middle of the aisle gazing up at the front of the church."

  She wrote. "What did you do next?"

  "I started walking, slowly up to the front. People were staring at me. I didn't like it. I wanted them all to go away, because I didn't know any of them and they were watching me. Making me uncomfortable."

  "But you continued walking, because you had to see your mother one last time."

  "Yeah, one last time. I was close, and then I saw Tristan. He didn't walk in with us, and I kept wondering where he was, and why dad left him behind, but he was there."

  "Tristan was where, Lane?"

  "By the casket, looking down at our mother," she said slowly.

  She leaned forward jutting a few notes before focusing on Lane again. "Lane, I need you to do something for me. I need you to look very closely at that picture for me."

  "It's the same thing."

  "No, it's not. Look very closely for me. Go back to before you saw your brother."

  Her head twitched and Dr. Collins could see Lane's eye balls moving back and forth beneath her eyelids. She was getting agitated, and she had to make her see the truth before she woke up.

  "I— I was walking toward the casket."

  "Yes. Don't focus on the casket, tell me what else do you see."

  "There is a picture of my mother surrounded by flowers."

  "What else, Lane. Tell me what else do you see."

  Her head shook harder, eyes squeezing from beneath her lids. Nothing— I—I don't— I see—"

  "Yes, you do. You see it. You know it's there waiting for you to find. So, find it. Tell me what you see," she pressed adamantly.

  "I can't."

  "Yes, you can." She inched forward. "It's right there, Lane. One more step that's all you need. Just one more." A sob broke from Lane's lips before she swallowed becoming silent. Dr. Collins knew what was there, knew the pieces she had been missing, but she needed Lane to see it. To understand that things aren't always how they seem.

  "Lane," she called.

  Softly she began speaking again, while tears dripped from her eyes. "There is something else— He was there, right there in the picture too."

  "Who was there?"

  "Tristan… He was in the picture too," she whispered in a child like tone while shaking.

  "Why was he in the picture?"

  She shook harder, softly mumbling, “because he was dead too." Dr Collins leaned back in her chair and stopped the metronome, jotted a few notes while Lane slowly opened her eyes, grabbing a tissue before finally breaking down into loud sobs.

  When the car flipped that day, a passerby had pulled Lane from the car, but it was too late for her twin who had been pinned by his seatbelt, head crushed against the window. Tristan had died that day with their mother, and Lane never knew, because she never saw it. She always saw what she wanted, and to her, Tristan was always apart of her life even though he truly wasn't.

  Olivia had said that losing Tristan felt like losing apart of herself, because essentially, they were like one person. With that part gone, Olivia felt like it had to be replaced, the void had to be filled, and so it was by another personality.

  Dr. Collins closed her notebook, glancing at her with a soft expression. "That would be all for today."

  ***

  The next afternoon...

  "Olivia."

  "Doc." Olivia eyed her with an amused grin as she took a seat on the couch. It was easy to tell both girls apart since Olivia always watched her straight in the eyes, and Lane never did.

  "How are you today?" She crossed her legs while opening her notebook.

  "What can I say, my room is the same color white it was yesterday. The food was missing a little salt, and this girl during lunch kept asking if I saw her cat, and I don't think she meant the purring kind."

  Dr. Collins chuckled. “Yes, well you are in a mental institution and they tend to come in an assortment of colors. So, what would you like to talk about today?"

  She rolled her eyes laying back with her head on the arm rest. "Isn't that what you're supposed to tell me? Because if I had to choose, I would discuss the male orderly who dispenses the evening pills. Now that is a topic for discussion."

  Dr. Collins smiled crossing her arms. "Alright, I'll pick then. Let’s talk about why you hide."

  Her eyebrows flew up head turning slowly. "What are you talking about?”

  "Well from all our previous discussions, I have noticed a pattern. Every time something becomes too difficult to handle, every time emotions are too much to bare, you hide and push Lane to the surface. Why is that?"

  Olivia blinked. "I don't know what you're talking about?"

  She resorted to her notes and all the previous conversations. "Okay let's see. There have been numerous traumatic events in your lives and through all of them, you're always looking through rose-colored glasses. Your mother and brother die, you were raped by your neighbor, kidnapped and held for two days, and in all these instances, you weren't there for the bad parts. Why did you hide?"

  “I didn't,” she scowled between clenched teeth.

  "You pride yourself for being the tough one, for being strong—”

  "Because I am." She sat up red faced and glaring. "Don't you think I have had enough shit on my plate? I was there for the accident, I watched them die,” she shouted. “Scott was the only one who knew about both of us, but he wanted Lane, and yes I made a mistake that night by getting into that car, but why should I be the only one to suffer through it when I didn't have to."

  The doctor pressed her index finger to her cheek while propping her chin on the rest of her clenched fingers. "So, in other words, you were scared," she said matter- of-factly.

  Olivia crossed her arms over her chest and turned her head toward the window. "I wasn't."

  "You are not the alter, Olivia. You created Lane to bare the burdens of your fears." A few weeks ago, after numerous conversations with the girls; Dr. Collins was able to pin point who was real and who was the alter. With a little digging she was able to confirm her suspicions
, since there was no record of a Lane Bennett ever being born to parents Steven and Jane Bennett.

  Olivia's eyes flashed to hers. "What are you saying?"

  She licked her lips and leaned forward pressing on her notebook in her lap. "What I am saying, Olivia. Is that your parents didn't give birth to anyone named Lane Bennett." Dr. Collins reached into her briefcase and retrieved a document, handing it to Olivia. “They gave birth to twins Olivia and Tristan Bennett on June 9th, 1994."

  Olivia scanned the birth certificate in her hand, with glossy eyes. "But—but how. How is this possible?"

  "When you were four, you created Lane to help you cope with the death of your mother and brother. You were empty and scared and you didn't like how that felt, so you hide inside your head. Lane was the product of your fear that day, which was why she only knew or saw certain things. Which was also why she never knew about you."

  She stood pacing. “So, you're saying that all this time, she wasn't real? That I was real," she said frantically moving from one end to another.

  Dr. Collins started waving her hand to stop her. "I'm not saying that she's not real. She is very real as you can imagine, since she's been apart of your life for the last twenty years. What I'm saying is she's not supposed to be here. She's not supposed to exist, and because you chose to hide, instead of facing your fears, that is the reason she exists, and that is the reason she will continue to exist. You have to stop hiding, Olivia."

  "I can't believe this." She flopped down on the couch, placing the document down. "All this time, all these years I kept thinking that she didn't deserve the life she had, that it should have been mine, when all along it was mine. She stole my life."

  "You gave her life. You created her. She wouldn't be here if you had learned to deal with your grief in a healthy way. Once she was created, it was easy for her to become a life of her own, because you were in denial. You kept thinking that you weren't real, that you were the alter, giving her the opportunity to live because she didn't know. She knows what you want her to know."