Always Mine

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Always Mine Page 7

by Sam Elswit


  When all the work was finished, he stood over the mound of dirt under which his father lied. I waited and watched him say his final goodbye. The sun hung low in the sky by the time he was ready to leave. Not a word was spoken, nor did it need to be. Two gravestones stood prominently beside the tree, casting their long shadows into the field.

  Joshua held my hand as we sauntered to the car in silence. He held my hand the entire ride home. And, we were finally alone.

  Chapter 16

  Joshua

  I sat on the porch with a beer in one hand and a pair of work gloves in the other. The farm was so quiet now. I buried my father yesterday, but today started just like any other day as though nothing happened. What in the hell was wrong with the universe? Didn’t it know that a good man was dead?

  I sipped at my beer, staring at the half-finished picket fence. There was no point in working on it now. It was just a mass of wood and nails, it served no purpose but as a grim reminder of dreams unfulfilled. I was about to tear the entire thing down with my bare hands it offended me so much.

  The screen door slammed shut behind me. Isaiah clomped his way out with a beer of his own.

  “Want some company?” he asked.

  I didn’t say anything. I really didn’t know what to say. What would I say about leading him on by holding his hand after the funeral the other day? What could I say?

  “Can we talk?” he asked.

  “If we’re goin’ to talk, you better get me another beer,” I said.

  “Way ahead of you,” he replied, tossing me a fresh can. I snapped it open and sipped at the froth that formed on the top. He joined me on the ground, sitting beside me. His hand came close to mine as he rested it upon the porch.

  “Listen, I know you’re going through a lot, but I wanted you to know that I did the right thing. I ended everything with Phillip. It wasn’t fair to him to keep him around when I knew it wouldn’t go anywhere. He’ll be mad at me for a while but I’m sure he’ll get over it eventually.”

  I found myself watching him closely as he tilted his head back to drink. My pulse pounded with desire and I found my mouth dry. I chugged down the first half of my beer without much effort.

  “Listen-”

  “No, I have more to say,” he added, interrupting me, “I don’t know how you feel about me and I’m not going to press anything. You have a lot to deal with without me adding more on top.”

  “Isaiah, I-” There were no words that needed to be said. Here was the most wonderful man I’d ever known and I couldn’t push him away for a second longer. My words stopped when I pressed my mouth to his. Our lips locked with all the force of a raging storm. I poured all my emotions, all my thoughts, and everything that remained into the kiss.

  His beer dropped from his hand as he fished for mine on the deck. I took his and held it close to my chest. He lifted me from my seat, almost wrenching me from the ground. I gripped him tightly as he pulled me through the front door and into another kiss.

  My mind was alight with excitement and my body burned with a fire I hadn’t known. Holding Isaiah’s hand as he led me up the stairs to his bedroom was as staring at a cake you were waiting to devour but being forced to wait just a moment longer.

  I stopped at regular intervals to pull him back to drink in another kiss. I didn’t know what to expect. I’d never been with a man before, but my whole body was shaking, giddy, and ready. I kicked off my shoes as we entered the house. My gloves didn’t make it past the stairs but fell lazily to the floor as I tossed them aside. My shirt was already being pulled over my chest by the time I reached the landing of the second floor.

  Isaiah spun around once we reached the top. I shrunk beneath his size, as I had in the past. His stern and powerful gaze brought me in line. I was his at that moment and he was mine. Again, his mouth tasted my lips. His tongue flicked at the tip of my own.

  His hand ran rested on my chest, my muscles reached up to meet his palm. My body was covered in a thin sheen of sweat from the thick and muggy air. The cold from his hand sent chills up my spine. His other arm grasped at the back of my neck and held me in place as his hand danced its way down my abs, skipping past my hips, and into my suit pants.

  I moaned with excitement as his hand landed on my already throbbing dick just waiting for his touch. He grasped it tightly, stroking along its length. Sudden bursts of electricity probed up my spine as I fought to maintain my composure.

  I unbuttoned his shirt between short breaths that I kept trying to catch; then tore his shirt down to reveal his perfect body staring back at me. My hands felt for whatever skin they could manage as I tossed my head back against the wall.

  He withdrew his hand from my pants, and deftly undid the button, followed by the zipper. My manhood fell into his outstretched palm. I felt liberated. My breathing became more labored in the moment.

  I traced my finger down his abs, stopping short of his tight jeans begging to be removed. He had liberated me, it was only right I do the same. I slipped the button loose and tore down his jeans where his throbbing member waited for me. I had never held another man’s dick in my hands, but now that I had, I wanted more.

  I pushed him back against the opposite wall of the hallway. He moaned with as he fell against it with a thud. He released my dick as I began to stroke his. I thought about the other day when I’d seen Phillip wrapping his mouth around Isaiah’s heaving member. I wanted to try it for myself.

  I kissed at his neck, then at his chest, stopping at his hips to admire the beast that waited for me. I licked the pre-cum that formed at the tip. I let the sweet, salty taste linger on my tongue for a second before devouring his offering.

  His dick felt massive in my mouth. He wailed with delight, clawing at the hair on top of my head. I looked up into his eyes for approval, but needed none. In his mind he was already gone, the pleasure had taken hold. He throbbed inside of my mouth as I forced it further down my throat. With my other hand I wrapped around what remained of his dick, stroking it in sync with my head.

  His hips joined in the rhythm pushing his dick further down my throat until I thought I might burst. With my other free hand, I began stroking my own member in unison. My body was hot as my mind was high on a drug that I had only just tasted.

  I couldn’t hold myself back any longer, and neither could he. I released myself to the floor below me as thick, sticky cum filled the back of my throat. Isaiah groaned and tightened around my head as he throbbed in my mouth. I took all he could give me, and when he’d finished I swallowed, accepting his offering.

  His knees were weak, and as he withdrew, he slid to the floor to join me.

  “We aren’t done yet,” he said. My cock was already starting to grow, but when he whispered that in my ear it shot back to attention. This was going to be a long night.

  I stood to my feet and took him by the hands, lifting him back to stand up and join me. I let what was left of my pants fall to the floor, as did he. We journeyed to his bedroom, our arms wrapped around each other.

  Everything felt so right. Isaiah filled the holes in my heart that had so recently been torn open. The house that felt so cold and dead when I first arrived was coming to life and so was the passion in my body that I didn’t know was there.

  He pushed me to the bed, playfully. I fell atop his messy bed covers; his pillows occupied the spaces between my shoulders, covering me with warmth. His room was piled high with old storage boxes and disheveled clothes. The bed I recognized as my own before I grew up, I was surprised he was able to sleep comfortably on it without falling off.

  Isaiah stroked his shaft while reaching for a small bottle of lube. I could sense where this was going next and felt intimidated at what he was nearly ready to do; however my curiosity was piqued. I rolled to my side as he coated his member.

  His hand found my thigh. As he held me, I felt a surge of heat crawl up my leg. He pushed me slightly, nudging me to my stomach. I did as I was commanded, giving him ample access to the normally
forbidden fruit that awaited him.

  I felt the cool sensation of the lube pouring near my ass. His finger spread it around my hole then slowly pressed its way inside. I resisted as a reflex but there was nothing I could do to stop the offending digit. It hurt at first, but only for a moment. The lube dripped inside as pangs of surprise followed with each drip.

  I pressed into his hand, waiting and begging for more. He worked another finger into my butt, stretching me open. I expected more pain, but none came. His fingers slid in and out, before long I was urging for another. Instead of another finger, he extracted what he’d pressed inside and replaced them with the mushroom tip of his throbbing cock.

  It felt enormous, pressing against my tight asshole. I felt a rush of endorphins take hold in the back of my mind. I knew it would hurt at first, but my body was ready and willing. I pressed my butt against his hungry dick.

  I bit into the pillow in front of me as he pushed his way inside. I could do little more than grab at whatever was around in an effort to fight my way through the pressure of his thick cock spreading open my body.

  I inhaled deeply, swallowing back the pain and giving in to the rush that spread to every extremity. I turned back to see the man that I loved pressing his dick further into me. Almost instantly the pain left and I was left with ecstasy. The more he offered to me, the more I wanted.

  Inch by inch he filled me. I wailed, trying to catch my breath as I mouthed, ‘Oh my god!’ silently into the blanket. My hand reach between my legs and I stroked at my own dick that was already ready to pop once again.

  His hands probed at my back as he began to withdraw, only to push himself back in with more force. I exhaled forcefully with each pump he brought and closed my eyes to give in to the rapacious urges that overwhelmed me.

  Isaiah’s grunts were only drowned out by my own moaning. My hand stroked my dick in tandem with his insertions. He grasped me by the hips, pulling himself in further until I felt his pelvis smashing against me.

  Everything in my vision blurred. I felt free from everything that life had burdened me with. There was nothing in the world I wanted more than Isaiah right now. I couldn’t contain a thought in my head; the pounding was driving me wild. I didn’t know how much longer I could last.

  Then like a stampede, my body exploded in waves of pleasure that flowed through every muscle fiber and every nerve. My brain melted into mush. My body could no longer hold itself up any longer. My cock convulsed, shooting wad after wad into his bed at the same time I felt his body give in to me. He pressed into me one last time, and with it I could feel his dick release deep within me. I was proud to be such a good partner.

  He withdrew himself as I fell into a mess on his blankets. Our bodies were spent, but our passions only grew higher. If I’d had another ounce of energy in myself I would have gladly asked for more. But, I gave in to the cloud that formed at the corner of my eyes and gave in to unconsciousness.

  His arm fell over my chest, and that was the last thing I felt before falling asleep.

  Chapter 17

  Isaiah

  The bed was laughably small for two grown men. I woke first with my body coiled around his. His head rested on my shoulder. His hair was messy and wild. My body ached from overuse, and I was weak from the energy I’d expended. But, I felt as though I was on top of the world, I was ready to run out of the room yelling with excitement.

  Joshua rustled beneath my arm. I stood still, hoping he’d continue to rest, but it was too late. He raised his head from the bed and with one eye still held closed, and the other squinting at the darkness you looked around.

  “What time is it?” he asked. I looked to the alarm I had set in the corner that was just barely in view behind the pile of boxes.

  “3:30am,” I answered. It was too early to get up for work. The earliest I liked to start anything was five in the morning. Another ninety minutes would do me some good, I figured. “Go back to sleep.”

  He rolled over, trying to get comfortable. I don’t think he realized where he was as he grabbed at one of the pillows and beat it into submission, only when he was satisfied did he stuff it under his head. He tossed side to side, almost falling off the tiny bed.

  “I can’t sleep,” he finally decided.

  I sighed. Half my body wasn’t even on the bed. My foot was holding up the side that wouldn’t fit. My arm was holding fast to the bed frame to keep me in place. I tried to give him more room, but there was none to give. I started to lift myself to move but he threw an arm around my mid-section to keep me still.

  “It’s not because I’m not comfortable,” he said, “I’m just thinking.”

  “About what?” I wondered. He twisted to his side, leaning himself to his elbow and letting his head fall into his braced hand.

  “I heard you tell a story to Phillip about your family. If it’s true, then it’s tragic,” he said.

  I was hoping that I wouldn’t have this chat with him anytime soon. Honestly I was hoping to never have the chat with him. I hated talking about my family. Joshua hated his father because he was strict and liked to argue, but at least his father didn’t hate him for what he was.

  I tried to find a comfortable position where I was mostly on the bed. My finger ran across the skin along his side, from his hips to his ribcage. He already knew the most of it, so there was little that needed to be told.

  “My family is a piece of shit,” I said. Joshua laughed; I didn’t realize I’d told a joke.

  “Sorry,” he said, “It’s just the way you said that.”

  “I’m only being honest,” I replied, “I still have some of the scars, see?” I took his hand and stretched out his finger, then showed it the place on my lower back where I’d received the worst of it. I thick scar streaked from my hip to the top of my butt.

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  “Why are you sorry? It’s not like you beat me.” I replied.

  “I know, but,” he paused to collect his thoughts. He pursed his lips when he thought. He looked so cute when he did that. “Here I kept going on about how much I hated my dad, and you had it so many times worse. I’m sorry I ever complained.”

  “We all got problems,” I said, assuaging his fears, “just because mine might be more severe doesn’t make yours any less important to you. Don’t worry about it.”

  He continued to feel around my body for any other scars.

  “How bad did it get?” he wondered.

  “I got hospitalized once,” I started, “I think that was the worst of it.” Looking back it felt okay to laugh at my misfortune, “Even then they only put me in the hospital when the neighbors called the police for me.”

  “That’s awful,” Joshua said.

  “Yeah,” I laughed, “Let’s hope they don’t find me again. I’m less worried about what they’d do to me and more worried about what they would do to someone I was with.”

  “Would they really get that violent with someone they don’t even know?” he asked.

  “I’m only playing,” I lied, “besides, I’m here to protect you in case they do come back. I’m bigger now; stronger. Let them do their worst.” I flexed a bicep. In truth, if he knew what my brother’s looked like, he wouldn’t have much faith in the puny muscle I had. I hoped that he wouldn’t have to find out.

  What was wrong with me? Was I so set on being with Joshua that I wanted to ignore the possibility of him getting injured? I felt as though I was giving in to my own carnal desires with little disregard for the one I was with.

  I stretched myself out on the length of the bed. It felt good after having been curled up for so long. I fell from the side of the bed, catching myself with my foot and pressing to my full height.

  “Come to think of it, I can’t sleep either,” I said, “I think I’ll make some breakfast.” I kissed Joshua and left the room. I was unsure of my actions, but confident that everything would end up alright; I hoped.

  18. Stay or go?

  I slipped into a routi
ne. I had been careful my entire life not to do so, but being with Isaiah was a dream come true. Somehow the monotony was gone from the simple tasks of preparing breakfast, or washing a car. Instead, every event was a life affirming event.

  A few days turned into a week, and a couple weeks turned into a month. My time was getting dangerously close to an end. I had to decide if it was worth it to return to the city for my final year of college.

  On one hand, I would have a degree. I could search for a better job and a better life for both me and Isaiah. But, if I found that better life, would he really want to come? I perished the thought. Of course he would come along. There was no way I would leave him behind anyway.

  However, what if he found another man that treated him better than me while I was away? I would hate to live a life without him, even if he was happier elsewhere. Of course I was greedy. He was the best catch anyone could hope to find and I wasn’t about to let him go.

  My bags sat packed by the front door. Every day that I didn’t leave was another link in a chain that kept me here. Dammit, I worked too hard to end up working a farm for the rest of my life. Would it be so bad if I stayed? I’d have everything that was worth living for. Good food, good people, a purpose, and someone to spend cold nights with.

  The picket fence had stalled. The leaves from the sycamore were beginning to shed as the early fall started to set, and covered the half-finished project. I sighed at the sight of unfinished business. Was I going to leave the rest of my life in the same state as that fence?

  I needed to leave, that was all there was to it.

  A cold can of beer appeared at my shoulder which I took. Isaiah had pulled a pair of old rocking chairs out to the porch and it was relaxing to lounge while staring out at the stars when night fell. The twilight was fast dimming into the night sky. Stars began to poke out of their hiding places for the two of us to enjoy.

 

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