by Jamie Pope
He couldn’t help himself when he was with her, and if he kissed her, he wouldn’t be able to stop. He wouldn’t be able to stop touching her. They wouldn’t make it out of the house tonight. They had to leave tonight.
He took her by the shoulders and gently set her away from him. The disappointment in her eyes was evident and caused something inside of him to squeeze painfully.
“I need to take a quick shower. I’ll meet you in the living room in ten minutes.”
* * *
Julian barely spoke to her since they left his closet. In complete silence, he had driven them to the hotel where the cocktail party was being held. Something major had happened between them, something that she had wanted. But now that it happened she was wondering if it were all a huge mistake.
She had wanted more from him than he had wanted from her. He wouldn’t kiss her. Oh, he had kissed her shoulders, his lips had brushed across her neck in a way that made her tremble with need, but she wanted to feel his mouth on hers. She wanted one of those long, deep kisses that took her breath away.
But he set her away from him and looked at her with a little pity in his eyes. She wasn’t as experienced as him. She must have been too eager, revealed too much of her desire for him in that closet. She felt incredibly ridiculous and vulnerable at the moment. But she wouldn’t take what happened between them back. She had never thought hands could feel so good on her body or that lips on her skin could make her forget her name. She had felt completely safe with him. That was a rare feeling for her and maybe she was wrong for feeling it, but if she felt it with him she could experience that feeling with another man someday.
A valet took Julian’s keys when they arrived and Julian took her hand and led her inside the building. She wondered why he did it. Especially when they were entering a work function. Surely, he wouldn’t want anyone to think they were together.
He paused right before they entered the room where the party was being held.
“I feel like I should apologize for what happened earlier,” he said into her ear. “But I’m not sorry that it happened. I wouldn’t take it back. I wasn’t expecting that tonight. I wasn’t expecting you to be you.”
“I don’t know what to say to that.”
“There’s nothing to say. We have to work together. We have to solve this case for Soren. I need to keep sharp for it and when you’re around everything gets . . . softer.”
“Not everything gets softer when I’m around you,” she said to him.
He let out a deep chuckle and Sunny’s heart flipped in her chest. She could become addicted to that sound. He was right to put space between them. She needed to find out if she and Soren shared a mother. She didn’t need to get involved in anything else that could end up hurting her.
“Behave yourself,” he said, still grinning. “We’ve got people we need to pretend to like.”
They entered the room where the cocktail party was being held. It was elegant to say the least with waiters in crisp white shirts and black vests passing around hors d’oeuvres and glasses of champagne.
There was a four-piece string quartet in the corner. People were speaking in hushed voices with polite smiles on their faces. Everyone in the room probably made in a week what she made in a month. She had only been around this much wealth one time before. It was the night she had met Julian. But Arden’s brother-in-law’s party had a much different feel. It was held in a trendy part of Brooklyn in an old factory that had been converted into spacious condos. She didn’t feel so out of place there.
She looked up at Julian and saw his smile was gone. He was a little stiffer, more business-like.
“Whose butts are we kissing tonight?” she whispered to him.
“No one. Just have a nice time.”
“Tell me who is important. I don’t want to say anything to offend anyone.”
“Don’t bring up sex, religion, or politics and we should be fine.”
“I only talk about those things with people I like to argue with.”
He surveyed the room. “You see that man by the bar in the gray suit?”
“The one with the very large ring on his finger?”
“Yes, that’s a fraternity ring. He was the president and is on the board of directors. He is also one of my firm’s founding partners. He has more connections than all the lawyers at the firm combined. Most of them political.”
Sunny wasn’t one to make snap judgments, but there was something about the man that made her want to avoid him. “He looks slimy.”
“Well, maybe he’s not as ethical as the other founding partner, but he’s a legend and he’s not someone you’d want to have as an enemy.”
Sunny frowned. “Only villains have enemies. You sound like we’re in some superhero movie.”
“He’s a flashy old school lawyer who got famous for representing everyone from mobsters to huge corporations. In those circles it is easy to make enemies.”
“And then there’s your other boss, Cleese, who made you take my case because he thinks your firm needs to give back more.”
“They need each other to survive and thrive. Bruno would have been locked up years ago if Cleese didn’t constantly remind him of his morality and Cleese would probably be practicing in some tiny firm somewhere with just enough clients to make ends meet without Bruno’s take-no-prisoners drive.”
“And then there’s you. Where do you fall on the spectrum? Are you more like Bruno or Cleese?”
He was thoughtful for a moment. “When I first decided to become an attorney, I wanted to be just like Cleese, but then I got to law school and was faced with a bunch of people who thought I was there just because I played ball. I had to prove myself there and when I got hired I had to keep proving that I belonged here and that means bringing in more clients and winning more cases. It means defending people who I know are guilty just because it brings my firm money. I’m probably more like Bruno than I would like to admit.”
“You defend pop stars and drunken football players with bad tempers. It’s not the same as defending mass murderers and corrupt politicians.”
“But the question I have been asking myself is, given the opportunity, would I?”
“Would you?”
“I don’t know the answer to that question.” He grabbed two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter. “Drink this.”
“You think the alcohol will make me more witty?”
“No. People rarely eat at these things but they do drink. You’ll fit in more.”
“I hope you realize that there will be ridiculous amounts of food at the next party. You have to eat.”
“Don’t worry. I will. We don’t have to stay here long. Just let me make sure my bosses know I’m here.”
“I think he’s spotted you.” Sunny saw Bruno look their way. Her eyes had connected with him and she looked away. He hadn’t just glanced at her; Julian’s boss had stared at her from across the room.
“King!” Bruno’s voice boomed across the room as he moved toward them. He smiled broadly, showing off all his teeth. He looked like a shark, handsome and slick, his walk a cocky strut.
“I’m going to introduce you to him,” Julian said to her, but his voice was resigned. He didn’t seem eager to do so and Sunny knew instantly that Julian didn’t admire his boss as much as some might.
“There’s our pretty boy lineman. How are you, King? I’ve been working out of the other office lately. Haven’t gotten a chance to talk shop with you.”
“My cases are going well, sir. I just added that fashion designer who ran into that storefront with her car to the firm.”
“That was all over the news.” His eyes widened slightly. “Should get the firm some nice coverage, but I don’t give a shit about your caseload. If I wanted to talk about the law I would talk to the hundred other underlings I have. I hired you so I could have someone to talk football with. What did you think of the draft picks this year? Who do you think will make an impact?”
“New England got the best unagented picks, but if you’re in the office this week we can have a detailed discussion about that. I would like you to meet my friend, Sunny. Sunny, this is one of the founding partners, Eric Bruno.”
“Sunny, huh?” He looked at her again, his eyes sweeping over her body. “Is that your real name, sweetheart, or some kind of stage name?”
“My real name is Sunshine and it’s nice to meet you.” She extended her hand and Bruno shook hers. His grip was a little too hard, making her feel almost trapped.
“Sunshine . . . I guess people really do name their kids that. What business are you in? I’m guessing you’re a dancer. Too classy-looking to be the club kind though. Which videos have you been in? I’m friends with a few directors in the business. I could probably get you in a few more.”
“Excuse me?” Sunny frowned, confused.
“Sunny is a social worker, sir,” Julian said with a little edge to his voice. “She works for the city and our firm is handling a pro bono case for her.”
“Are we now? Who cleared that? Wait a minute. Let me guess. It was my partner. If we don’t spend at least three hundred billable hours a year helping the needy, he becomes self-righteously pissy and unbearable to work with.”
“He was very kind to agree to help us,” Sunny said, trying to keep her voice neutral.
“His father was a civil servant or some bullshit like that. He’s got a soft spot. So, I guess you’re no dummy then, sweetheart. I was going to compliment King here on turning a video girl into someone respectable enough to come to this party and then I was going to ask him to help me turn some of my dancer companions into faux respectable ladies.”
“Sunny went to Columbia. She has a master’s degree. She didn’t need any help from me.”
“So you like this one?” There was a knowing smile on Mr. Bruno’s lips. Sunny wanted to smack it right off his face. They were speaking about her like she wasn’t there.
“I don’t just like her. I respect her.”
“Ah, so different from our last conquest. Regina must be screaming on the inside. She’ll hate that you traded classic elegance for a newer, faster model.”
“I’m not an object, Mr. Bruno,” Sunny said with all the grace she could muster. “Julian didn’t trade Regina for me. We are just friends. He is working on my case. I respect him as much as he respects me.”
“Eric,” Mr. Cleese had walked over. “You aren’t harassing our staff and our clients, are you?”
“Shut up, Cleese. I’m just having a chat with my man, King. He’ll always be my favorite at the firm because he helped me win fifty grand his rookie year. I’ve had money on him since college. He’s been well worth the investment.”
“Surely, you don’t think we hired one of the top attorneys in our firm just because you earned some ill gotten money off a game he hasn’t played in ten years.”
“Yeah.” He winked. “It’s the reason I hired him. Plus if some shit goes down he’ll double as security.”
Cleese shook his head in disgust and Sunny immediately liked him ten times more than she did the first time she met him. “How are you, Ms. Gibson? It’s very nice to see you again.”
“I’m doing well, Mr. Cleese. Thank you for asking. And thank you again for your firm’s help. The family is beyond grateful.”
“It’s our pleasure. Come on, Bruno. There are some clients over there that have been asking about you.”
“Why are you dragging me away? I was just getting to know Sunny.” His eyes dragged over her body and Sunny felt exposed even though she was fully dressed. She forced herself to stand taller. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of making her shrink away.
“Because your name is on this firm. This get together was your idea and you owe it to your clients to mingle. Now go mingle.”
“Fine. King, we’ll talk more later. Sunny, I hope to be seeing you again soon.”
Sunny said nothing. Julian just nodded and watched as his boss walked away.
“Fifteen more minutes,” he told her. “I just have to say hello to a few people and then we’re out of here.”
Chapter 8
Julian had gotten separated from Sunny during the party. He had stepped away from her, only meaning to be gone for a few moments to have a private conversation with one of his clients. He had left her with a group of acquaintances, hoping that she wasn’t too uncomfortable with them. He was worried about how she would hold up. With Regina he didn’t have this worry. They could come to a party together and separate for the entire evening without a single thought to how the other was faring. He had wanted that in a woman. He was telling himself that he still wanted that.
But he wasn’t sure how true it was. He wasn’t worried that Sunny would embarrass him. He worried that someone would say something that would make her feel out of place, like she didn’t belong. He had already gone through enough of that in this setting for the both of them.
The conversation had taken longer than he expected and when he returned he saw that she was gone and he was afraid that she had left, but a bigger part of him was afraid that Bruno had gotten her alone. He didn’t like the way the senior partner had stared at her. Every dirty thought in his mind was evident in his eyes. Bruno was a man who was used to getting whatever he wanted. Most of the time he wanted women. Young, beautiful ones that he could parade around the city. Ones who were impressed by his wealth and status.
Julian scanned the room for Sunny. He was feeling uncharacteristically uneasy. He was feeling angry, but he couldn’t put his finger on why. He wasn’t with Sunny. He couldn’t claim Sunny. He wanted her, but it was just some attraction he had not learned to control. But when he saw Bruno looking at her like that, he wanted to wrap his fingers around the older man’s throat and squeeze the breath out of him. The only clear thought in his head when he saw the other man’s eyes travel up her body was she’s mine.
But she wasn’t his and he didn’t want her to be his. He wanted to stay away from her. But the attraction was too strong and every time he tried to make the break, something pulled him back in.
He finally spotted her across the room. She was indeed with his boss, but not the boss he had been worried about. She was speaking to Cleese. The man was smiling at her, the conversation they were having apparently entertaining to them both.
He could never make a connection with the man. He was fairly sure if it had been solely up to Cleese, Julian never would have been hired at their firm. Bruno had loved the idea of hiring a former pro athlete and he never let him forget it. It didn’t seem to matter how many years had passed, or how many cases he had won. He was stuck in the same role.
Julian started to make his way toward them, but he felt a hand on his wrist. He looked down to see Regina there. She was looking regal and beautiful. But there was no fire there, no warmth. His body didn’t react to her touch. There was none of that adrenaline rush he got when he was with Sunny. There was no pull between them.
There never had been a pull there, yet he had wanted to marry her.
“Hello.”
“I thought you said you weren’t dating her.”
He didn’t need to ask who. It was clear that she had seen Sunny, but how could he explain away her presence? He couldn’t. He didn’t have to bring her here tonight. But he did. He had wanted her with him. It was as simple as that.
“We’re friends. I like her. I see her.”
“You knew I would be here tonight. You don’t have to throw her in my face.”
“Excuse me? I didn’t know you would be here tonight. I had to ask to have dinner with you two weeks in advance. How the hell do you expect me to know your schedule?”
“We talked about this night months ago. You invited me to come. I cleared my schedule for it.”
“But then we broke up. And all the things we did as a couple ended.”
“I didn’t honestly think the last time I was with you was the last time I was going to be with you.”
�
�I told you what I needed. You couldn’t give it to me, so I moved on.”
“I couldn’t give you what you needed? What about what I needed? It goes both ways.”
“How was I supposed to know what you needed? You never told me. You never talked to me about anything.”
“You never asked.”
He wasn’t sure why she was here. She never called him after the day he asked her to marry him. There had been nothing, just the clear message that he wasn’t good enough to be her husband. But now she was in front of him acting like he had done her wrong. “What are you looking to accomplish tonight? I can’t have this conversation if there isn’t a point.”
“There is a point. I want to know how you could throw me away after being with me for nearly five years.”
“I didn’t throw you away. And how much time in those five years did we spend together? We were off and on most of the time. We don’t sleep at each other’s houses. We talk about politics and art and the news, but when did we ever talk about us? About anything that really matters?”
“What if all that changed?”
He frowned at her. “I don’t understand.”
“What if I agreed to marry you?”
“Why would you want to marry me? You don’t love me.”
“How could you possibly know that?”
“Don’t answer me with questions.”
“You know I’m not like other women. I can give you things she can’t.”
“This is just about Sunny. You see me with someone else and now you suddenly want to marry me?”
“I always wanted to, but I wanted you to treat it like it was something special and not like a business deal.”
“Our entire relationship was a series of negotiations. There was nothing deeper. You want to be chased. You want to be worshipped. I can’t give you that. And now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve someone waiting for me across the room.”
He left her, feeling angrier that he had been before. This wasn’t a good night for him. This hadn’t been a good few weeks for him. Sunny must have felt him barreling toward her. She looked at him and then turned back to Mr. Cleese, giving him a quick hug before she rushed toward Julian.