Tangled: A New Adult Romance Boxed Set (12 Book Bundle of Billionaires, Bad Boys, and Royalty)

by Lakes, Krista

  I knew he wanted me to strive for more, to find my future, but without people returning my calls, there wasn’t much I could do.

  He was on the phone with his sister a lot, and at one point I overheard him mention I was wasting my life away serving booze. I was crushed; he said it with venom in his voice, not with hope of a better future. Did he think I wasn’t good enough based on my job?

  When I confronted him, he admitted that while it was okay at one point, he expected better things from me, but thought I was settling. The real problem was he had too much time on his hands. His physical therapy had him cagey and unsettled. He needed something to focus his time and energy on, since football wasn’t happening right now – and it was like I became his pet project.

  I couldn’t keep doing this, him trying to mold me, micro-manage my life, trying to change me. I mean, if he wanted to motivate me great, but it wasn’t that – it was more like he thought he knew what was best for me. It became smothering.

  Our fights were about my career, my lack of trying, and what was I going to do with my life. The pattern grew weary, and after one too many arguments, I caved.

  “Steel, this isn’t working,” I finally sighed. “I can’t be who you want me to be.”

  “I just want you to want more for yourself.”

  “What if I was perfectly happy being a bartender? Would that be enough?”

  He looked away, not wanting to voice his truth, that no, it wouldn’t be enough for him. He wanted a woman in his life who strived for greatness. He finally said it, and they were words he couldn’t undo. “I guess I just expected more out of you.”

  I felt like a wounded kitten. “So, I’m a disappointment. Why do you keep me around?”

  “I love you, Avery; I just don’t think I’m in love with you anymore. I’m losing respect for you, now that you’ve settled for mediocrity. I don’t know if I can live with that.”

  The sting was intense. The words were out and there was no going back.

  I wished him well and gathered my things. I had no idea where I’d stay, but for now I’d find a cheap hotel room until I could find something better. We were through here, there was nothing left. His words struck me hard, and if he wasn’t in love with me there was no point in staying.

  I found rooms that rented by the week at the “29 Slumber Motel” on the outside of town. It wasn’t pretty, but at least I had my own bathroom, unlike when I lived at Phil’s. The hotel was full of people that made the rent-by-week place their ongoing residence. I felt like a vagrant, but for now it would be home.

  I’d look for a house to share or room for rent in a nicer part of town when I found my motivation. Right now the only thing I wanted to do was curl up in bed and cry.

  When Steel came to Hops and Scotch, I wasn’t expecting him. Sitting at the bar, he waited for me to see him. I was in the back, grabbing a plate of food for a customer.

  Walking back, I stopped in my tracks. He knew I’d be here. Holding my breath, I glanced over and then approached him. “I’ve got to drop this plate off, I’ll be back.”

  He nodded.

  Taking a deep breath, I turned and went back. “What are you doing here?”

  “Come home, Avery. I miss you.”

  “You don’t love me,” my eyes were starting to mist over. Shit, I didn’t want to cry at work.

  “I do love you. I was a jerk. I can’t sleep without you by my side. Please baby, come home.”

  I swallowed hard, and as much as I wanted to tell him there was no way in hell I was going back, just to prove a point, I knew it would be stupid. I missed him and wanted to be with him, I just didn’t like where our relationship was going. I hoped it was something we could fix.

  I finally spoke, “I’ll get my stuff after work.”

  “Where is it? I’ll get it for you.”

  I handed him the key, “29 Slumber Motel, room six.”

  He nodded. “I’m sorry, Avery. I was wrong. I need you as much as you need me.”

  “I love you,” I got out before breaking into tears. I quickly corralled them, not wanting to lose control behind the bar. My customers didn’t need to see this.

  “We’ll make this right,” was all he said, and then got up to leave.

  I was stunned. Part of me wanted to be angry, but the other part was so relieved he’d be back in my life. We belonged together. We needed each other.

  Chapter 15

  I was responsible for this. It wasn’t Avery’s fault. I felt like less of a man, my career on the line, not knowing what my future held. I’ve been an ass, unkind with my words. Sometimes I don’t filter myself like I should.

  Truth be told, Avery coming into my life made me feel complete. There was something sweet that came out. She was still guarded at times, but the way I feel when she’s in my arms makes me happy.

  I want what’s best for her, and she’s such a smart girl, that I worry she’ll settle for less than she deserves. I know her confidence took a hit a couple years ago, but she’s worth so much more than she realizes. She doesn’t project that, and then settles for good enough. She’s capable of so much more.

  I want to lift her onto my shoulders and help her reach her dreams, but the girl just doesn’t dream – at least not what I can see. Only in my effort to push her, I pushed too hard and came off like a jerk.

  She seems lost, uncertain what her future holds. I don’t know how to change that. I can’t make things better, I can’t fix it, and that’s a hard place for me to be. I feel so much saner when I’m in control – but she’s got to live her own life, and I need to let her.

  I don’t mean to come off as overbearing, it’s just that sometimes the way I love that girl overwhelms me. It’s in her lack of self-respect that I get frustrated. She muddles through, settles, and doesn’t reach for the stars. I’d buy her a god damned ladder if it would help, but I don’t know how to help anymore – and that puts me at a loss.

  The only thing I’m certain of anymore is that I both want and need Avery by my side. She’s everything to me.

  Shame ran through me as I pulled up to the “29 Slumber Motel”. It was a hole in the wall kind of place, she shouldn’t be living here. The white cinderblock walls were painted years ago and were peeling. The letters on the sign showed wear, and one of the letter e’s was missing, so the sign read “29 Slumb-r Motel”. It had fallen off ages ago. She deserves so much better than this shit hole, and it was me that sent her there. The cars in the parking lot were all jagged and tired, sitting with bald tires and too many miles on them.

  I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. She had nowhere to go and ended up here. It’s not like she could go home to the assholes that called themselves her family. Gathering her belongings, I returned her key to the office and headed home. This was my fault. I did this to her...and now I need to fix it. She expects more from me, and I let her down.

  Chapter 16

  I had to ring the doorbell. I didn’t have a key anymore. It felt weird, almost symbolic, waiting for him to let me back in. I felt like an outsider, like I didn’t belong, and yet I wanted to be here. Without Steel I felt empty. Ever since he found me that day, bartending at Phil’s, I knew he was special. He was the man that sat me out, let me be who I was, and it confused me that he wanted something different today. Why wasn’t I good enough doing the same thing I’d always done.

  He said he wanted more for me, wanted me to reach higher, but I didn’t know if it was for me or if it was for him. I found a new place to work, a cleaner, more respectable bar – but maybe it wasn’t enough. It had to be. If he wanted me, this was who I was. Yes, I went through college and got a degree, but I wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t even know if I wanted another job. Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t, I think my mood changed daily – but he’d have to accept me regardless of what I did, because my identity wasn’t some job.

  When he opened the door, he apologized. “I should have given you your key, I didn’t think.”

  “It’s ok
ay,” I said, a little nervous to enter. I wanted to jump into his arms, but it wasn’t that easy. We had things to work out. The tension was thick. We loved each other, but would it be enough to carry us through?

  “I’m glad you’re home.”

  “Me too,” I walked past him and sat on the edge of the sofa. “Steel, we need to talk about this.”

  “I know,” he said, sitting in a chair caddy corner to the sofa.

  “I want this to work, but something’s broken.”

  He nodded, “We’ll figure it out,” he paused, “together. Don’t leave, Avery, I need you here.”

  Steel needing anything came as a surprise really. He was always so in control, like he could tackle the world with stacks of concrete on his shoulders, a bull pushing through and taking charge. I couldn’t picture him needing someone as simple and as messed up as me.

  “You don’t need me,” I whispered. “You can move mountains without me.”

  “But I can’t undo my broken heart,” he said, his eyes meeting mine. “I love you. I want you beside me. I was a fool to send you away.”

  I looked down, breaking our eye contact. “But you’re not in love with me,” I repeated softly, the words killing me.

  “That’s not true. I was trying to hurt you, and that makes me an ass for sinking that low. Avery, just give us another chance. We need this.”

  I nodded, and sank back into the cushions of the sofa, relieved that whatever had happened between us seemed to have passed. I couldn’t imagine life without Steel, and now I wouldn’t have to.

  Standing up, he sat next to me, letting his hand rest on my knee. “Can you forgive me? I’m sorry I wasn’t more careful with your feelings.”

  “Yeah,” I whispered. “Can you forgive me? I was a bitch.”

  “Yeah,” he said.

  We sat exhausted and worn from the emotions between us. It didn’t lead to incredible make-up sex like so many other people talk about, but there was a tiny spark that had us clasping our hands together tightly, and in that moment sitting on the sofa holding hands felt amazing.

  With his physical therapy starting, now that the cast was coming off, Steel was ready to move again. He knew he wouldn’t be playing as soon as he wanted, but at least it was something. Once the cast came off, it made a huge difference in his demeanor.

  Seeing him climb out of the depression was like recognizing the old Steel of past. I didn’t realize just how heavy the burden of his injury had been. His identity was tied to his career, and if he wasn’t useful he didn’t know if the Red Hawks would keep him. He had no intention of just being a bench warmer.

  It was great to see him coming back to himself, and that lifted me up as well. The mood lightened at home, and we seemed to be back on track. My biggest hurdle now was deciding what I wanted to do with my life. I couldn’t bartend forever. I mean, sure it’s a job and brings in money, but there was more to life – and I needed to decide how I’d be spending mine.

  When human resources from a local company called me on a resume I submitted months before, I got nervous at the thought of interviewing all over again. The last jobs I applied for in corporate environments hadn’t gone over well. I froze up in situations with strangers, a social anxiety that didn’t bring me across in the best light. Sure I could do the actual work, but getting past the interviewer was my biggest challenge apparently.

  Steel was excited for me; we went over possible interview questions, rehearsing what I might say. Maybe I could land this one. Picking out my outfit carefully, I thought maybe this time I’d get it.

  Sitting through the interview, I thought maybe, just maybe it might work out. And then he said the words that took my breath away. “So, Steel Brickman of the Red Hawks, huh?”

  “This interview is over,” I said, standing up. He couldn’t...he wouldn’t...right?

  The entire drive home I fumed over the intrusion into my professional life.

  “Did you set this up,” I confronted him angrily.

  “What does it matter? It’s a job, and one that you wanted. I asked for a favor, it’s part of business.”

  “Steel, you get to live beside me, but you don’t get to live my life. You don’t get to direct it like some stage play director. I’m not taking the job,” I finished.

  “It’s a perfect opportunity, Avery. Don’t spit in the wind.”

  “I want to get a job on my own merits, not based on who my boyfriend is.”

  “I don’t get it, all I did was contact somebody. The interview was up to you.”

  “Steel, if I took that job, I’d always be known as the girl who got hired based on who I knew and not based on my ability. It belittles me in front of other co-workers, and then they’ll start to wonder what other favors I’m getting.”

  “Who’s to say you get a job on your own, that people won’t just assume I had something to do with it?”

  “I’ll know I got there justly.”

  “Stop being such a martyr. It wasn’t even a special job, it was entry level, a chance to get your foot in the door,” he answered.

  “Steel, you get to be part of my home life, part of my love life, but you don’t get to be part of my career. You’ve got to accept this at some point.”

  “I was just trying to fix things for you, make it right. You deserve that job, you’re more than qualified.”

  I sighed, he’d damn well try to rescue every stage of my life – the question was would I let him.

  “No more favors, I get a job on my own merits, promise me.”

  “Fine,” he said, disgruntled but accepting my request. “At least let me take you out to dinner to make it up to you?”

  I nodded, “Only if you promise – no more interfering.”

  “No more interfering,” he said. He meant well, in his eyes he was doing something loving. I was torn between being mad at him for sticking his nose in where it didn’t belong, and appreciating that he loved me enough to want good things to happen.

  I was more determined than ever to prove to him I could land a job. I’d put in extra effort and send another round of resumes out, whatever it took.

  “Take pity on a man with a bum knee,” he smiled, following me into the bedroom to change.

  How could I not laugh? “Fine, you’ve been properly scolded.”

  “I think punishment is in order, like maybe being forced to endure endless, smothering kisses, and maybe even sit on me, and pin me down in order to teach me a lesson. I have the perfect place for you to sit,” he grinned.

  “You’re naughty,” I laughed.

  “I thought you liked that about me?”

  “I do,” I said, stripping off my blazer, and slowly unbuttoning my blouse. “A girl needs a little extracurricular activity,” I pondered, “maybe I could get some exercise in.”

  “Leave the skirt on, ditch the panties,” he grinned. “You can pretend to be my secretary, taking dictation, get it.”

  “You’re proud of yourself for that little play on words, aren’t you?”

  Steel grinned.

  “You’re such a boy,” I said rolling my eyes.

  I was tired of the hot and cold pattern we’d been in, and was so ready for it to be hot with no forecast of cold.

  When he kissed me, his soft lips on mine, I melted. This was the Steel I fell in love with, the warm man that wanted me, made me feel special, made me feel safe, and was oh so sexy.

  I flashed back to our first kiss. I was shaking inside, wanting him to touch me, and yet afraid of being touched. And yet here we were all this time later, having weathered so much together.

  Steel pulled away only long enough to peel his clothes off. He moved gingerly with his knee, and laid back. Climbing over my lover, we reconnected after what felt like forever.

  His hands played my body like a well-tuned instrument, knowing all of my sensitive spots. I sighed at his touch, and as he caressed my body, I melted into him. His fingers danced across my skin, barely grazing it, and then stopped to teas
e me as I pressed against him. His hands were magic, and I was his muse.

  Our mouths reconnected, with my breasts pressed against his chest, and with his fingers groping my bottom, I moaned lightly into his mouth.

  With each thrust from below, my fingers dug into him, now holding onto his shoulders, and with a final push my peak crested out of me. Arching my back, my thighs gripping tightly, I held fast to my lover, enjoying the sensation as it rippled through my body.

  Chapter 17

  By the time I finally landed my first job out of college, it felt like forever had passed. It wasn’t fabulous, it wasn’t high-paying, but I got it all on my own. That alone made it feel special. I was in an entry level position for a national landscaping company. You’d have thought I won the lottery with the way I celebrated that day.

  The funny thing is, as much as I wanted that job, I ended up missing bartending. They’re different worlds with different expectations, and different types of co-workers. Either way, it was a step in the right direction, and I think Steel found something gratifying about me settling into a new kind of working environment, even if he didn’t put it that way.

  He was finally making some progress with his knee, and hoped to be given clearance to play sooner than later. He would be out for the season, as much as he’d hoped he’d make it back – and wouldn’t get to play again until the following year. Sure he’d train, sure he’d be there for the games, but until he was fully functioning, he was still sidelined. They paid a lot of money for his contract, and hoped the investment would pay for itself the following year. He hated being a bench warmer.

  When Kira called, Steel wasn’t sure what he thought of the news. She’d met somebody and wanted him to meet the guy. You’d think she said she was moving to Mars by his reaction. I knew nobody would be good enough for her in his eyes, and the thought that there was another man that was a priority in her life was difficult for him to hear. It was a weird dynamic, the relationship they had.

  I think they relied on each other so much through the years, and with the loss of their mother, they never really did well when one moved forward. It’s not that they didn’t want each other to be happy; it was that there was this weird co-dependent relationship between them. No longer being the biggest priority in the other’s life was a change they each had to adjust to. First it was Kira’s turn, learning to accept me into Steel’s life, and now it would be Steel’s turn to accept Kira had somebody special.