A Sure Thing

by Marie Harte

  He smiled. “I fell in love with Greta at first sight. It took her a while to recognize I was The One for her. But like you, I didn’t trust my feelings because I had to analyze them to death. Luckily for me, Greta came around before I could talk myself out of loving her.” He looked at Ava and paused.

  “What?”

  “It’s scary to open yourself up to someone else. I know. We’re so closed up, not supposed to share ourselves while we give so much to others. But Ava, if you don’t help yourself, you’re no good to your patients. Let’s say you open yourself up and let yourself love him. What then? Maybe you last, maybe you don’t. You can’t keep living with lists and five-year plans. They’re great for organizing, but hell on a life worth living.”

  “Not you too? I love my lists.”

  Dennis chuckled. “Just don’t define yourself by them.” He paused. “Dig deep, Ava. Feel, experience love, experience sadness. Yes, we don’t share it in here. But we have to feel it to know it and trust it, don’t we? From hate comes love, from fear, trust. Experience emotions. Don’t smother them.” He patted her knee. “And that’s all I have for you. That and trust in your gut, Dr. Rosenthal. It won’t steer you wrong.” Then he left.

  She sat, contemplating all he’d said and all she’d felt. Had Dennis—and Landon—been right? Was she letting fear rule her when she’d been the one accusing Landon of not sharing his feelings?

  A reminder for her one o’clock appointment buzzed on her phone. She gathered her files, lost in thought, and realized her next client could be the poster child for salvaging what could have been a doomed relationship. Perhaps she’d pay particular attention to what he had to say.

  She gathered her notes in order, then went in search of him in the waiting room. “Brody? Great to see you again. Come on back with me.”

  Chapter 19

  “So how are you and Abby getting along?”

  “Great.” Brody Singer beamed. He’d come a long way from the tense, wounded man who’d started seeing her a year ago. He came in once a month or more if he felt the need. A victim of child abuse, he’d been carrying around scars that had never healed. But the love of his fiancée and his family had done much to mend the hurt young boy still inside the man.

  Brody chuckled. “We’re still getting married next month.”

  She smiled. Brody was a handsome blond—must be my month for blonds—and he shone with love when he talked about his fiancée. “Abby’s a lucky woman.”

  “Yeah, I keep telling her that.”

  She chuckled. “So you and she are living together, and you’re feeling okay about that now?”

  “Had some nerves at the beginning, but we settled a while ago. Feels like we’ve never been apart.” His knee started bobbing.

  It never failed to amaze her how someone who could appear so confident and together could be so shattered within. Anyone looking at Brody would think him a handsome, confident man who let nothing stand in his way. He had a successful plumbing business he ran with his best friend, a woman he loved and who loved him, and a family that would die for him. Another one of the McCauley clan, though not by blood.

  Yet Brody had issues he needed therapy to help him resolve.

  “But…?” Ava led him.

  He blew out a breath. “But we’re gonna be married next month! Doc, I have to say, I’m freaked out. I mean, I’m happy and fine one minute, a spaz the next.”

  “By the wedding.”

  “By the baby! Abby’s pregnant. She doesn’t know that I know, but I saw the test under the bathroom cabinet. And fuck if I can get my head around this.” He fidgeted in his seat. Brody had a difficult time sitting still, so she watched him work through it. “I love her. I mean, Abby’s my life. I can’t imagine being without her.” He ran a hand through his golden blond hair. “She’s perfect. My life is perfect. Hell, even the damn dog has been behaving. And Hyde’s typically a real nightmare.”

  She bit back a grin. She’d seen pictures. The dog could have passed for a miniature horse. “So what’s the problem then?”

  “I’m afraid…” He paused and rubbed his chin. “I’m afraid I’ll fail my kid. My parents were awful people. They screwed me up. What if I turn out to be like them?” His voice grew hoarse. “Much as I wish it, I’m not a McCauley. Not really. I’ve still got bad blood in me.”

  That fear stuck with Brody and would continue to haunt him until he came to peace with his past. They’d talked about it before, but she knew how much he worried about being anything like his family. “Speaking of blood, are you still in contact with Jeremy?” Brody’s biological brother.

  Brody gave a smile. “Yeah. He’s good. Real good. He’s dating a girl right now that’s helping him a lot, and his work at the substance abuse place has been therapeutic, I think.” He blew out a breath. “I’m an idiot for panicking about the baby, aren’t I?”

  “Not at all.”

  “I mean, Jeremy turned his life around, and he didn’t have what I have—my brothers, Bitsy, and Pop. They supported me through it all.” His grin lit up the room. “And Abby. Man. I can’t wait to be a dad.” He picked up a stress ball from the table and started squeezing it. “Then I think about it, and I get all freaked out. I’m happy, and I’m nervous. And I’m not supposed to know about it. Flynn thinks I—”

  “You told your brother?” Technically his best friend, but Brody and Flynn had grown up together.

  Brody shrugged. “I tell him everything. Anyway, he said I should chill the hell out and just focus on the wedding. To not worry about it until Abby tells me.”

  “Do you think she’s holding the information back for a reason?”

  “Yeah, because I’m a dumbass who hyperventilates whenever we do something new.”

  She remembered his panic about moving in with Abby. Then the news they’d become engaged, which had unglued him. Brody shouldered through, though, and Abby had been right by his side throughout it all. She’d even come to a few counseling sessions.

  “Tell me, Brody. When you think of a life with Abby, what comes to mind?”

  He lost his scared look and smiled. And in that joy, she saw a truth that blinded her. “It’s perfect. Everything I want or need, she’s there for me. She makes me smile, makes me laugh, turns me on,” he said with a chuckle. “She accepts me for who I am. I never take that for granted. Of all the guys she could love in this world, she chose me.”

  “So if she trusts you to love her and care for her, don’t you think you should love yourself as much? That your baby will be fortunate to have a father who won’t make the same mistakes his father made? Perhaps you could think of your experiences as a child like that, as a terrible example you’ll never, ever follow.”

  Brody nodded. “I like that. Yeah.”

  She appreciated the affirmative tilt to his head. “Brody, can you tell me something else?” She wanted to give him this positive reinforcement, and maybe steal some information for herself as well.

  “What’s that?”

  “You and your brothers have all found love. But how did you know Abby was the one for you? How did you know it wasn’t just a passing fling?”

  He grinned. “Great question. At first, she was just lucky to have me.” He laughed at himself. “Well, she was. But who am I kidding? I was lucky to have her. Just being around her put a smile on my face. For me, it was loving our times out of bed more than the ones in bed. I’m not gonna lie. I love sex. But I loved being with Abby more. She gets me, you know? And she’s the only person who tolerates Hyde.”

  “Yes, there is the dog, isn’t there?”

  “He’s great. He finally stopped eating my socks.”

  “Progress.” She smiled. “So tell me about the wedding. And don’t leave anything out. This is your chance to vent everything about saying ‘I do’ in front of all those people.”

  He groaned. “Man, I
was handling that just fine until you mentioned it.” At her look, he muttered, “Well, not really.” Then he told her how scared he was that Abby would change her mind.

  After Ava talked him through his feelings, she finished her next appointment without much fanfare and called it a day. But she hadn’t been inside her condo for two minutes before someone pounded on her door. Both excited and nervous to see Landon again, and wondering if she’d thought through what she planned to say to him, she found herself face to face with Elliot instead.

  “Oh my God. I could just scream.” He stomped past her and flounced onto the couch.

  She shut the door behind him and sighed. “Come on in and sit down.”

  “Do you have any idea what my life is like right now?”

  Perfect. Elliot was having one of his moments.

  She groaned and flopped next to him. “Tell me, Cousin. What’s wrong with your life?”

  “I had sex with the man I’ve been trying to keep at arm’s length. But I’m only human, and I couldn’t take it anymore. But he wants so much from me. I’m not sure I can handle it, and if I don’t get it together, he’ll leave. Me! Leave me! It’s unfathomable.” Elliot looked a little wild around the eyes. “Unlike you, my hunky banana isn’t idolizing my every move, doing whatever he can to make me happy.”

  At the thought of her hunky banana and her being over, Ava’s eyes filled. “Yeah? Well my hunky banana split.” She burst into tears, stunning Elliot into silence. “And I didn’t even mean that terrible pun. It slipped out of me.”

  “Split? Slipped? God. You’re two for two in the cheesy category. But about your hunky banana, now this I have to hear.”

  * * *

  Landon worked out like crazy. He spent the weekend wondering if anything he’d said had gotten through to his dense, loveable, crazy doc. It didn’t help seeing Mac all over his sexy bride, watching couples in love walk hand-in-hand down the street. Having fucking coffee together.

  Hell, he and Ava could have been doing that. He knew what she liked to drink. Her favorite foods. That she liked red more than blue and missed her parents, who lived in Cheltenham, Pennsylvania.

  He and Ava had done a lot more than fuck all the time. They’d actually had conversations, liked the same stuff, mostly—though he had to admit he didn’t like reading as much as she seemed to, but she didn’t like sports with his enthusiasm, so it all evened out.

  The stubborn woman. He kicked a rock and walked around Queen Anne in the rain Sunday evening, having nothing better to do. His arms ached. He’d really pushed himself, and his guns were bitching. Even Gavin had called him an idiot, and his brother was barely speaking to him since the toilet prank. Apparently being tricked into peeing on oneself left a lasting impression.

  Landon felt small joy in knowing he had one sibling left to prank before he’d declare himself king of the prank wars.

  Ava would have laughed with him. She’d gotten a kick out of Hope’s pink hair.

  He sighed. Ava. For a brilliant psychologist, she was acting like an utter moron. He’d pulled out all the stops. Gone big. Declared his love and hers. Because, come on, he knew she loved him.

  The woman watched him when she didn’t think he was looking. She stroked his chest, his hair, his cheek, when they lay in bed, recovering from amazing sex. They’d fucking made love. As in, soul to soul, staring into each other’s eyes while they came. That kind of love.

  It had only been two days, but it felt like two years. He couldn’t eat. Couldn’t sleep. Barked at his family and friends. Even at Sadie. She’d made some smart remark at the gym about Ava and he’d nearly bitten her head off. Then he’d apologized all over himself and left a few hours ago.

  There was no way a simple tiff with Ava should end their relationship. Uh-uh. No way he’d let it. That thought in mind, he tried to shake himself out of his funk. He walked with purpose, though he had no destination in mind. He lingered by the corner of Boston and saw something dart into the street.

  “Shit.” He raced after it and nearly got hit by a car unconcerned with stop signs. “Hey asshole, watch it,” he yelled, cradling a shivering puppy to his chest as he hurried to the sidewalk.

  “Up yours,” the jerk behind the wheel of a BMW yelled back through the crack in his lowered window.

  “Yeah? Come on out and say that to my face, motherfucker.” Landon was so ready to go there, needing a release for his anger, his hurt and tension.

  But the guy took a good look at him and drove away. Fast.

  “Jackass.”

  “What do you think you’re doing?” a deep voice growled from the sidewalk across the street.

  The guy sounded familiar.

  “Trying to help this puppy. What’s it to you?”

  The large man wearing a hoodie ran over to him, and Landon readied to drop the dog and deal with some homeless dude with an attitude. Except the hoodie slipped and he recognized the guy.

  “Is this my day for dickheads or what?” Landon swore again, still cradling the shivering puppy. “It’s okay, little guy. I won’t let this jerk be mean to you.”

  “Mean to him?” Sam Hamilton, one of the thugs who worked for his cousin Mike’s fiancée, glared at Landon. “He’s mine.” The guy was taller than Landon, and surprisingly more muscular. It was like he’d eaten a steroid factory and was always on a rage.

  “Yeah, Hamilton? Way to take care of him. You’re doing a bang-up job.”

  Sam narrowed his eyes. “Oh hell. You’re one of those prissy Marines. McCauley’s cousin, right? Lancelot, Lenny, something like that.”

  “It’s Landon,” Landon said through gritted teeth. “Landon Donnigan.”

  “Whatever. Gimme my dog.” Sam gestured with his head and Landon could see the tattoos running up the guy’s thick neck. Probably prison tats in addition to the cars and tribal designs painted over his arms. Sam worked as a mechanic and had the look of a guy fresh out of jail.

  “Why? So you can beat him, starve him, then throw him in a ring with a giant Doberman? No fucking way.”

  Ready for Sam to try to slug him, Landon prepared himself.

  Sam’s nod of acceptance surprised him. “You know, for a Boy Scout, you’re all right, Donnigan.”

  “Boy Scout, please.” Landon soothed the small puppy. He glanced back at Sam and read the guy’s concern. “He’s really your dog?”

  “I’m fostering him at a friend’s house, but he got loose. Come on, Macho. You know you can’t break out like that.” Sam took the small puppy in his arms, and the little guy licked him, transforming Sam’s face from a block of granite into a real human with feelings. Hell, even his eyes looked like they had color, a light blue-gray, and not the demon black Landon had previously associated with him.

  He’d met Sam and his mechanic buddies at Mike’s engagement party. They’d been assholes, so he and Gavin had tossed them a fair share of attitude until their boss, the guy dating Aunt Sophie, had begged for mercy. Then Landon and Gavin had flirted with their hot dates instead.

  But if the guy could care for a foster dog, Sam couldn’t be all bad.

  “You want to grab a beer?” Sam asked, surprising him.

  Landon blinked. “Uh, sure.”

  They found a bar with a compassionate waitress who fetched a towel and a water dish for the dog. “You out here slumming?” Landon asked him and ordered a beer.

  Sam did the same. “Yeah, because us poor folk love nothing better than to lurch around the rich dick types in Queen Anne.”

  “You don’t have much of a sense of humor, do you?”

  Sam shrugged and scratched behind the puppy’s ears. The little guy was in heaven, rolling his head back. There was one other customer in the bar, the hour near to closing and the rain keeping most folks indoors.

  “Why are you out here, Donnigan? Hanging out with all your friends?” Sam smirk
ed.

  “Funny guy.” Landon thanked the waitress for the beers and took a swig from his bottle. “Nah. Trying to think is all.”

  Sam watched him, took a long drink himself, then nodded. “Woman problems.”

  “Yep.”

  Sam shook his head. “You guys are so easy to spot. Foley, Johnny, McCauley. You all get whipped and don’t know what to do with yourselves.”

  Landon didn’t appreciate the observation. “Foley?” He remembered the huge dude and that he and Sam were best friends. “I thought he was your girlfriend?”

  Sam gave him one cold-ass stare, one that said Sam would rip out Landon’s spine and not think twice.

  In the mood to accommodate a fight, Landon stared right back. Bring it, asshole.

  Then Sam sighed. “You know, you’re not as big a pussy as I thought you were. I like you, Donnigan.”

  “Thanks so much.” Landon downed his beer and asked for another.

  “So I’m gonna give you some advice.”

  “You’re kidding, right?”

  “If you’re in love, don’t waste your time here with me and Macho. You should be out with your woman getting some.”

  “You think that’s good advice? That’s common sense. Except the damn woman doesn’t realize she’s in love with me,” he muttered and took the bottle the waitress handed him.

  Sam rubbed the puppy with the towel, watching Landon with what looked like sympathy.

  Great. I’m getting lectured and pitied by a guy who could make a shiv out of his spoon. “Shouldn’t you check in with your parole officer before he reports you for being missing?”

  Sam grunted. “Good one. No. I’m done with that.”

  Figured.

  “Buddy, you’re fuckin’ lame. When Foley had problems with Cyn, he didn’t let that stop him. Of course, she came back to him, because he’s not a moron like you, but still. He would never let anything stop him from making love to his woman.”

  “How about a restraining order? Would that stop him?”

  Sam smirked. “Nah. Not my boy.”