I Need You Always

by Cynthia P. O'Neill

  We walked back into the kitchen where he directed me to one of the place settings at the bar. “Let me get our food and we can talk and straighten this out. If I need to, I can go on the trip alone, while you work out of the office.”

  I let out a loud breath that I didn’t realize I’d been holding. I watched in fascination as he went to the refrigerator and took out two salads and some dressing. He pulled some warm bread from the lower oven and placed on the counter with olive oil and dipping spices, before opening the main oven and taking out a small pan of chicken parmesan.

  The smell was intoxicating, taking me back to my grandmother’s kitchen, in Sicily, and comforting memories. She used to cook my favorite Italian foods all the time. My mother never wanted to learn to cook and I only learned a couple of recipes before my grandma passed.

  Dane seemed at ease in the kitchen plating up some pasta from the stove with sauce, a piece of chicken, and then grating some fresh parmesan cheese on top. He started passing the plate to me.

  I put my hands up to stop him. “I hope you don’t expect me to eat that. I wouldn’t even be able to eat half.”

  He lifted one eyebrow to me in a disapproving look, but said nothing as he placed the plate at his setting. He made another plate with a smaller portion of everything. “You don’t eat enough or the right kind of food. Please tell me you haven’t been living off the ramen noodles and peanut butter you sent over.”

  “What I eat is none of your concern. Can we just get through this meal and discuss the trip so I can deal with this new life?” I was a bit snarky, but I didn’t care.

  “I have wine, water, tea, or some soda to drink.” I watched as he poured himself a small glass of wine.

  “Some wine would be nice maybe it’ll help me sleep tonight.” I tried smiling to ease some of the tension between us.

  He sat the wine glasses in front of us and turned to ask, “What commitments do you have that I need to add to my calendar?” I watched as he pulled up the calendar app on his phone.

  “I need to be back here a week from this Saturday for my graduation at three in the afternoon. Then a few weeks later, I have my roommate’s wedding, where I’m one of her bridesmaids. The wedding starts at four in the afternoon and the reception will follow until late that night.” I pointed to both dates, as he laid the phone down on the counter between us.

  He relaxed a bit and laughed. “We should be able to push up one of the meetings overseas and get you back in time for your graduation, no problem. As for the wedding, we don’t have anything scheduled around that time.”

  I watched as he started eating and enjoying his meal. “Eat up or the food will get cold.” Something about his voice held a bit of dominance and warning. It both terrified and excited me.

  I took a small bit of chicken and thought my mouth was going to explode with flavor. This was, by far, the best chicken parmesan I’ve ever tasted, so much that I moaned in appreciation. I realized my mistake and looked over at him with his fork paused midway to his mouth. “I can’t eat if you’re looking at me like that.”

  Dane laughed softly. “Sorry. I just want to make sure you eat. You look like you’ve lost a lot of weight lately.”

  Whoa! He watched me that closely? I felt self conscious now and tried turning away from him to try and eat.

  I felt my chair being pulled back around. “Don’t hide from me Marissa. If I have to, I’ll tie you to the chair and feed you until you eat everything on the plate.” His voice was very adamant. Why did my heart just skip a beat? Normally this kind of control freaked me out. But, then again, Tom just plain ordered it done, while Dane was all smiles with his directives.

  I sucked in a deep breath, ready to berate him for his statement when I noticed he had a couple dish towels in his hands and him standing right by me. “Do I need to follow through on my promise?”

  I begrudgingly turned around and started eating. He pulled his bar stool closer, where our arms touched. “I worry about you.” He picked up my arm and squeezed it a bit. “See look, you shouldn’t bruise this easily. It means you’re not getting enough nutrition. If we had the time I’d insist on you getting a physical from our family’s physician to make sure you’re healthy. When we get back, I think I’ll insist on it to make sure you’re all right.”

  Why would anyone go to this extreme? “Why do you care?” I snapped back.

  He slapped one hand down on the counter, grabbing my attention. “I care because we’re coworkers. My job is very demanding and requires us to be in tip top form. I need you to be able to keep up with me in the workplace and here at home.”

  I started to argue the last statement when his fingers pressed against my lip. “Before you go spouting off, remember that we’ll work from here at times, with phone calls and figures needing to be calculated in the middle of the night, while talking to potential buyers and suppliers from overseas.”

  There seemed to be a bit of an underlying innuendo there, but I let it go. His reasoning was true and I’d forgotten about the crazy work hours I’d have.

  We continued our meal in silence. Dane wouldn’t stop watching me until I’d eaten the very last bite. “Are you happy now?” I grumbled.

  He smiled and started to take the plates. “I can help with them you know. If I’m going to live here, the least I can do is help clean up and help cook.”

  “Thank you.” He looked over at the clock while I rinsed the dishes and loaded the dishwasher. I noticed the time was only nine in the evening.

  “You should probably go on to bed, Marissa. We’re going to get little sleep as it is before we have to leave tomorrow.”

  I looked at him puzzled, not sure why he was telling me what to do again. “What time are we leaving?”

  Dane started turning off some of the lights, though leaving a small light above the bar area on in the kitchen. I followed as he went through the rooms and turned the rest of the lights off and set the alarm. “Remind me to show you the alarm system when we return home. For now, we both need sleep because we need to be dressed and at the airport by three in the morning.”

  I just about choked on my words. “Three?”

  He grabbed my hand and led me up the stairs toward my bedroom door. “Be sure to dress in some comfy traveling clothes in the morning. We’ll have our luggage on board with us and can freshen up and change into our business attire shortly before landing. If we need some extra sleep we have a sofa and a bed on board.”

  “Do I need to check the suitcase to make sure I have everything?”

  He shook his head. “Everything you’ll need has been packed. If we missed anything we can pick something up while we’re there. All you need to worry about is your toiletry items and any medications you may need.”

  He leaned forward giving me a kiss on the forehead. “Don’t worry about anything, just get some sleep and relax. Tomorrow will be a big day for you. You can read up on the first file while on the plane and mostly observe the first meeting. However, I’ll need you to bring the sales spreadsheet up to date and do some of your fancy statistical predictions to see which items will most likely be best in our various areas of distribution.”

  I just stood there transfixed by all he’d stated. “Okay,” was all I could manage, as I watched him walk across the hall to his room and wink at me before closing his door.

  I closed the door to my room and noticed that the suitcase I’d had on the bed earlier had been emptied and placed into the closet. All of my items had been hung up. Great, does he have silent ghosts working for him? How am I going to find where all my items are?

  It took me almost twenty minutes, but I finally found where the comfy t-shirt my brother had given me, along with my pajama bottoms, had been placed. I guess all my sleepwear and unmentionables are in the chest of drawers.

  I found the small travel bag for my personal items and headed into the bathroom to change and pack up everything I didn’t need to use in the morning. I couldn’t believe the number of perfumes, bo
dy gels, and other items he’d purchased, all with high end labels. Could this all be real? I wonder if there’s a catch to all this.

  I’d just settled into bed and set the alarm clock so I could wake in time for a shower, when my phone pinged with a text.

  Dawn—Wed 9:45 PM

  How’s it going girl? What’s the house like? Do you like your new coworker? Is he good looking? I so want to call you, but not sure if you’re busy or asleep. Let me know how things are. Ash and I already miss you!

  I smiled, feeling a little home sick missing talking with my girls. Ashley had been staying at the house lately trying to pack up all of the items she’d need to move. She and Brian had already found a lovely home to move into. Dawn would be staying through graduation, but would be moving to Atlanta, Georgia, for her new position as a marketer with an international public relations firm. Although she’d fly back for Ashley’s wedding. I had to keep reminding myself that friendship is forever!

  Wed 9:50 PM

  Hey, sweets! OMFG, Mr. Prescott’s son, Dane, is the elevator guy! The holy hotness of kissing! He’s okay, just a bit on the controlling and dominant side. He scares me a bit, but not to the level of Tom. I already have my first assignment, heading overseas in the AM to a few different countries.

  Dawn—Wed 9:55 PM

  WTH! Does he still have the swoon worthy long locks and highlights? Tell him to back off a bit, use your girl power! Okay, overseas . . . I’m so jealous!

  Wed—10 PM

  The locks and highlights are gone But, hotness level kicked up another notch! Girl power rules, doll! NTG, leaving at 3 AM, sleep awaits.

  Dawn—10:05 PM

  Hugs to you, hon! Still so jeal! Safe travels. Let us know how ur doing! Wait . . . will you be at grad?

  Wed—10:07 PM

  Will be at grad! Hugs back to u and Ash! <3 u Night.

  Dawn—10:09 PM

  We <3 u too! Night.

  I checked the clock again, yawning like crazy, before finally letting my head hit the pillow. I was out like a light.

  I HAD THE HARDEST time sleeping knowing that Marissa was across the hall from me. I think I managed a few hours before the clock went off waking me at 1:30 in the morning. I didn’t want to get up so early, but needed to make sure we reached the airport. I didn’t have just myself to deal with this time.

  I went ahead and jumped in the shower to wake myself up. The shower was invigorating, especially with it being an ice cold one. I couldn’t let her see me sporting a boner having dreamt about her underneath me all night long. Stop thinking about her or you’ll be sporting another one!

  I got out about twenty minutes later and looked out into the hall realizing her room was still dark. I slung a full towel around my hips and tried knocking on her door. When no one answered, I reasoned that it’d be okay to go in to wake her up. After all, we couldn’t miss our flight.

  I noticed she’d left a small light on in the bathroom, enough to light her room so she could see where she was going. She looked so peaceful hugging her pillow, her dark mane of locks was in disarray framing her heart shaped face. I looked over to her clock and realized it had already gone off she must’ve hit the snooze bar.

  I shook her shoulder gently. “Marissa, it’s time to wake up.”

  She moaned and rolled over, kicking some of her cover off and exposing her long legs. Her shirt was pushed up showing her mid-riff, making me hunger to touch her skin. Don’t go there Dane, think business, think airport, and remember your cold shower!

  I quickly put away my desires and shook her shoulders again, with a little more force this time. She started to stir. “Marissa?”

  She jumped back, grabbing hold of the covers, as her eyes went as wide as tea saucers. “What the heck, Dane?”

  “You have less than an hour to get yourself ready before we need to be at the airport. I thought I should come wake you up, unless you plan on boarding the plane in your current state,” I mused.

  She looked over at the clock and panicked. “I can be ready in less than thirty, will that do?”

  I started to get up, when she yelled out, “Oh my God!” and turned her head the opposite direction.

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “What, you’ve never seen a man in a towel before?”

  She shook her head and blushed. “Actually I haven’t, other than my brother, so could you please turn around, leave or something so I can get out of bed?”

  I just continued on to the door, not bothering to respond. I figured we’d have a long enough flight and plenty of time to get to know each other’s quirks on our trip. Hmm, a boyfriend, but never seen him in a towel. I wonder how close they were?

  I went back to my room, hearing a whirl of commotion in hers. My luggage was packed, I just needed to shave, get dressed, grab my laptop and paperwork, and we’d be ready to go.

  We appeared to be running on schedule, both opening our bedroom doors within a few seconds of one another. I’d dressed in a pair of jeans, polo shirt, and sneakers. She was in one of her new pair of jeans that really flattered her figure, a sparkly t-shirt, short jacket and sandals.

  I offered to carry her luggage, but she insisted on doing it herself. I admired her spunk, but managed to get it out of her hands before she reached the stairs.

  “You know I’m not helpless!”

  I just shook my head and backed her up against the rail, looking deep into her eyes. “You have a lot of spunk, Marissa. I like that, it’s a turn on.” I let my lips brush lightly against hers, but not enough to kiss before continuing my trek down the stairs. I wanted her to feel the connection between us. I wanted her to crave it as much as I did.

  I could hear her breathing alter and it took her a while before she followed me. Yes, she is definitely affected by me. At least I’m not the only one suffering.

  Rick had been busy driving my parents to their benefit late last night, so we had the other driver, and guard, Derrick taking us to the airport. I opened the door to see him already waiting for our luggage.

  “Morning, Derrick. Are we still on schedule for this morning?”

  “The plane is still on schedule, though we just had to alter your flight plans. Marjorie had to do some major rearranging of your meetings. There’s been a family emergency with the Nikolas group, so you’ll be going to France first instead of Greece. She already has a new itinerary waiting for you on the back seat.”

  I looked back to see where Marissa was. She’d stopped at the front door and was leaning against it and hyperventilating. Derrick reached for her luggage, as I reached for her.

  My hands caressed both sides of her face and I drew her up to my line of sight. “Look at me, Marissa.”

  She didn’t respond, still staring off into space, her breath faltering. I hated doing it, but knew if she was as submissive as I thought, she’d respond. “You will look into my eyes NOW!”

  Her eyes shot to mine immediately and her body trembled.

  “Okay, now that I have your attention, I want you to take a deep breath in, hold it, one, two, three, four, and now release, one, two, three, four.” She did as instructed. “Let’s repeat it, a deep breath in . . . now breathe out.”

  We continued this for a couple of minutes until her breathing returned to normal. I was surprised that her eyes never left mine. They followed the instruction and stayed on me the entire time. I moved some of her loose hair behind her ear and cradled her face with one of my hands. “Better?”

  She nodded.

  “Want to tell me what that’s all about?”

  “I guess I’m just nervous. I’ve only been overseas once.”

  I leaned in and set the alarm before pulling her close to me and guiding her to the limo. I’d expected her to be a bit rigid, but she seemed to melt into my side, giving me hope for a possible future.

  She climbed into the limo and moved to the far side of the car, buckling herself in and placing her briefcase between us. Normally I would be upset by anyone trying to keep me from them, but
our dance, as Kent had illustrated to me, had just started. It was apparent that she was comfortable with me in some instances and not in others. I wonder who hurt her and just how bad it was?

  I picked up the new itinerary and reviewed it, liking the timing much better, which would allow us some down time instead of one meeting after another, as was originally scheduled. Maybe I could show her around a bit, break the ice, and get to know each other a little more.

  I was lost in thought of all the things I wanted to show Marissa, when I heard her ask, “Where are we going first?”

  “We had a small adjustment in our trip and are headed to Bordeaux, France, first, then we’re off to Athens, Greece, and our final destination is Florence, Italy, with a possible stop over in Montesportoli.”

  She looked puzzled. “Will we be able to make all of those locations and still be back in time for my graduation?”

  I reached out to her hand, giving it a squeeze of reassurance. “We should be back either Thursday night or early Friday morning, with time to spare. Will your family be here to support you on your special day?”

  Marissa’s face was sullen and a couple of tears began to slide across her cheek, as she shook her head. Her voice was shaky. “My parents can’t make it because their business is in disarray and my brother doesn’t know if he’ll be able to because of his current work assignment.”

  I quickly moved the items from the seat and scooted next to her, my arms circling around her shoulders and drawing her near. “Shh. No need to be upset. If your brother can’t come, I’d like to be there for you.”

  Her head lay on my shoulders, as her tears quieted. “You’d do that for me?”

  “Of course.”

  “But, why?”

  “Let’s just say that I don’t believe anyone should have to go through their graduation alone. Just let me know whether Nate can make it back in time, if not, I’ll step in for him.”

  I pressed a kiss to her temple, as we continued onto the airport.

  It was fascinating seeing the plane through Marissa’s eyes. She was captivated, and I think a little scared, about flying in a private plane. I’d reassured her it might be smaller than the jumbo jets, but it would allow us to fly in comfort and not have to be cocooned in amongst the other passengers.