Nowhere To Run (To Protect And Serve)

by Mary Eason

  Slowly she propelled herself up on her elbows. “Yes, I think so.” It took another moment before she remembered her brother’s death. “Jeremy. Oh God.” Her face crumbled and the tears she’d been fighting since they’d met came in a rush of sobs.

  The whooshing sound of his sigh as his breath left his body was lost over the heartbreaking measure of her grief. Time be damned. Procedure be damned. He needed to touch her. Riley sat next to her and gathered her close in his arms. Her resistance was brief and then she accepted him, clung to him. He wanted to hold her like this forever. Protect her from the truth. But there could be no protecting her from this truth.

  “I’m so sorry,” he whispered against her hair, his lips brushed against its soft strands.. The moment he touched her for the first time, he felt it stronger than ever before. He’d formed a personal connection with her. As much as he wanted to hope otherwise, he knew it that had nothing to do with grief really. All his years with the Bureau had insulated him from this part of death, dealing with facts only, the details of murder instead of the personal side. Coming to homicide proved to be a revelation.

  Survivors of violent crimes, those who lost loved ones tragically were now his specialty. One thing he’d learned from his time at homicide was those left behind bonded with the person closest to their loved ones at the time of their death. Until now, until her, he’d managed to distance himself emotionally. She was different. Life-changing. She’d left her mark on him, on his life.

  “We’ll get whoever is responsible for doing this to your brother, Jordan.”

  The woman in his arms looked into his eyes and a vortex of out of place emotions warred with his common sense. “Will you? You promise?”

  The pleading her voice was his undoing. He bent his head and captured her trembling lips. For a moment, neither of them moved. Shock, and need, and a thousand different unspoken emotions kept them still. His lips slipped softly across her, gently coaxing her and himself into far more deadly ground. His fingers tangled in her hair, slanting her mouth more securely against his. The clasp holding her hair in place broke free, bouncing from the bed, clattering to the floor. Neither of them noticed.

  It was as if a damn broke inside of her. One hand cupped his face, the other hovered between them, touching his chest tentatively with her fingertips before flattening her palm.

  A breathy moan parted her lips, opening her to him. He dipped inside, tasting her, drowning in a softness that seemed to go on forever. Knowing this was as far as she’d let things go, he took his time. Sampling, learning, enjoying.

  For a moment, she stopped returning his kisses. Greed and desire had him pulling her closer still, pressing her against him. Whatever doubts she had, evaporated in the heated passion that was unfolding between them. She pressed closer, taking the control from him, her lips meeting his kiss for kiss.

  This was wrong in so many ways and yet he lacked the strength to end it completely. He didn’t want to let her go. It would mean whatever this crazy thing was happening between them was over and he might never see her or hold her like this again. Still, time was critical. He needed answers.

  He pulled his mouth away but couldn’t bring himself to lose contact just yet. He brushed his thumbs along her jaw and pressed his forehead to hers.

  She gently pushed against his chest and Riley let her go.

  “Jordan.” His voice sounded raspy, unlike himself.

  She needed space. He understood. Remnants of shared passion still hung heavy in their breathing. But what had just happened? She needed comfort. He gave it. Was that all there was?

  He’d witnessed some of her most intimate emotions. She didn’t like that. She inched away, embarrassed by the tears.

  As much as he hated to push her for details, time still mattered and it was quickly running out on what he needed her to say to her.

  He touched her cheek and she raised her eyes to his. “Don’t speak. Don’t ask questions. There isn’t much time and I need you to listen to me very carefully. Your life may depend on it.”

  Her eyes widened in surprise. Maybe it was his words. His tone. The grimness in his eyes. He wasn’t sure. But he’d gotten her attention. He thought he saw the tiniest of nods. “I’m sorry about your brother. But you need to know the truth. This wasn’t a random act of violence. Jeremy wasn’t in the wrong place at the wrong time. This was deliberate.”

  “What are you talking about? I don’t understand.” Something shifted in her expression. She knew something. Her eyes raked his and she shook her head. “Who would want Jeremy dead? He was just a kid. Why did you mention my fiancé earlier?”

  Outside, Riley heard his partner making conversation in a louder than normal voice. Santiago. He retrieved one of his business cards and slipped it into her lab coat.

  “You can reach me at any of the numbers listed on my business card. My cell phone’s on all the time. I need to talk to you in private, about Jeremy. About what just happened. But for now, I need you to listen. We only have a few minutes and your life might just be in danger as well. I need you to promise me you won’t trust anyone. Especially those closest to you. Especially not Caesar Santiago.”

  “Danger?” She tried to pull away, but this time he didn’t let her.

  Riley’s gaze held hers. Something inside her stilled. “Jeremy’s death was a deliberate attempt to send a message.”

  “Message? What message? I-I don’t understand—“

  Before Riley could answer, the door flew open on its hinges and Frank stepped inside followed by another man. Riley recognized Santiago mostly from the hours of video surveillance he’d watched of the man. To anyone looking on, the tall well-dressed man would have appeared to be anything but dangerous.

  “Ah, see -- there she is, Mr. Santiago.” Frank shot Riley a questioning look. Burbeck wanted to know if he’d gotten anything useful from Jordan. Riley confirmed the truth with a slow shake of his head. “Safe and sound.”

  Caesar Santiago quickly assimilated the scene before him, not missing Riley’s close proximity to his fiancé. His personal touch. A gamut of emotions flashed within his dark eyes. Anger. Jealousy. Speculation. He’d want to know what had taken place between Riley and his fiancé before he’d entered the room.

  For all the horrible details of the things Riley’d read about Santiago he despised the man. That he knew Jordan intimately had increased that distain tenfold.

  From what’d just happened between himself and Jordan, he couldn’t conceive she had any real emotions for the monster that was her fiancé. No way was he wrong about that. So what would she chose to do after tonight?

  Riley could only hope some of what he’d been trying to convey to her about Santiago’s true personality might have gotten through to her. And he had to admit, pissing off a slimeball like Santiago was kinda nice. An added bonus.

  He deliberately took his time releasing her.

  “Jordan, are you okay?” The caring persona Santiago used for public appearances slipped back into place. If Riley didn’t know the monster that lurked beneath the polished exterior, he might actually believe Santiago was as grief stricken as his fiancé.

  “I’m so sorry, my love. So sorry. This is such a tragedy.” Caesar Santiago ignored Riley altogether. Moving to his fiancé side, he tried to take her in his arms but she pushed him away. Riley had a feeling her chilly reaction had nothing to do with what had taken place between them here in this room.

  Obviously, there were problems between Santiago and Jordan.

  Santiago recovered his poise quickly enough. “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. So sorry. I can’t believe this is happening. I came as soon as I heard the news.”

  Santiago’s remark brought up a whole new line of questions to mind. How exactly had the man gotten the news so quickly? From what he’d just witnessed, he doubted Jordan would have called the man.

  Riley moved away, but not before he caught the first strands of Spanish. No doubt what the Columbian had to say he intended for his fianc
é’s ears only. Riley wondered what lies he’d tell her this time to try to convince her of his innocence.

  His partner tapped Riley’s shoulder and silently indicated they should leave. As he followed Frank to the door, he turned in time to see fear and something else in Jordan Scott’s beautiful eyes.

  Dear God he hoped it was doubt.

  Chapter Three

  Jordan somehow managed to hold it together until they’d left the hospital before she jerked away from Caesar’s overly protective grasp. He’d use the situation to try and force her to do his will. She couldn’t allow that to happen.

  Not now. Not with Riley’s kiss still fresh on her lips. And his terrifying warning still ringing in her ears.

  Riley’d brought her back to life again for a few brief moments. Now, she felt numb inside. Dead. Just like her brother. And yet the growing bitterness inside of her made it almost impossible to keep from confronting Caesar with the accusations she’d heard. It took all of her willpower to remain silent. Now was not the time. She needed to be careful. She couldn’t afford to tip Caesar off about the things she now suspected. She’d need some hard evidence to bring him down. Without ending up like her brother. And she would. If it was the last thing she ever did alive.

  Outside, a crisp, fall morning greeted them. But unlike all those times before, today she stepped out into a world that would never be the same again.

  As always, Caesar seemed to read her thoughts. “It will be okay, my love. I promise it will.”

  The sound of his endearment grated along her sensitive nerves. She wanted to scream. Rage at him.

  He tried once more to bring her close but she pushed his hand away. She couldn’t stand being near to him recently, after his unfaithfulness, but now, after hearing what Riley had alluded to, his touch repulsed her.

  “No.” The resentment smoldering in his eyes was frightening. “I’m okay. I just need to clear my head.” He accepted her lie for the moment.

  She kept remembering little things that she’d dismissed as insignificant in the past. The late night meetings. The trips abroad. The calls that had started a little more than a month after Caesar returned from Europe the last time. The covert conversations were all conducted in a language she didn’t recognize. One of the few occasions she’d answered Caesar’s home phone, the person other end had promptly hung up the second they heard her voice. When she’d questioned Caesar about them, he’d written off her fears by telling her he’d acquired a new client that refused to speak with anyone but him.

  At the time, she’d dismissed it as odd but nothing to be concerned about.

  But now?

  Unexpectedly, she remembered something Jeremy had said to her recently. They’d been arguing about Jeremy’s disturbing change in attitude. For months before his death, Jeremy had become withdrawn. Moody. Angry. So unlike the carefree kid she’d help raise.

  Jordan finally confronted her brother, but Jeremy had refused to talk. When she’d demanded to know what was going on in his life, he’d actually laughed in her face. Right before he’d asked her how well she really thought she knew him or Caesar.

  At the time, she’d thought Jeremy’s comments strange considering he all but worshiped Caesar.

  To cover up the doubts running through her mind she asked, “How could this have happened to Jeremy? The police said they found him in South Bronx? What the hell was he doing there? I don’t understand any of this. My brother’s not supposed to be dead at nineteen.”

  Caesar stopped walking and turned to her. “I don’t know.” He hesitated for a moment. “Jeremy…well he had his demons.”

  Suddenly, she was afraid of what he might say. She forgot all about the courage she’d felt in Riley Donovan’s presence. “What do you mean?”

  “You honestly didn’t notice the change in him over the past few weeks?”

  Of course, she had. Jeremy had become a total stranger. He rarely opened up to her anymore, which made his sudden urgent need to talk that much more mysterious.

  “You were working such long hours at the hospital after our…argument.” Caesar was saying.

  She didn’t want to discuss their problems tonight. Not now. “No, I did notice. You’re right. He had changed.” Caesar reached for her hand and brought her back into the circle of his arms. For the time being, she couldn’t afford to tip him off. “He wanted to talk to me. He said he had something important to discuss.” Just for a moment, Caesar’s steps faltered. He caught himself, but she’d seen something change in his expression. He looked worried.

  “What did he want to talk about?” They’d reached Caesar’s car. He studied her expression carefully before opening the passenger door. He waited as she got into the low-slung Mercedes.

  “I don’t know. We were supposed to get together tonight after my shift ended. I never called him or heard from him. Things became so crazy. I lost track of time. I got the page from ER and then--” And then her world had shattered.

  Caesar started the car then turned to her. “We may never know everything that was going on in Jeremy’s life. You cannot torture yourself. Jeremy made his own decisions.”

  “You think this is drug related, don’t you?”

  “Isn’t it obvious? You were too close to him to see all the signs. Your brother’s behavior changed dramatically. And I didn’t want to mention this before, but I’d noticed things missing from the apartment. Valuable, irreplaceable items. Jeremy had begun stealing. All classic signs of someone supporting a drug habit, I believe.”

  Even in death, Jordan wanted to protect her brother. She’d been protecting him most of his life. But the truth would come out no matter how hard she tried to deny it. Of all people, Jordan understood the process. There’d be an autopsy. Her brother’s body would be cut apart.

  The truth would come out.

  She didn’t know how to defend Jeremy from himself. Jordan turned away to stare out the window. The sympathy in Caesar’s eyes appeared genuine. He was so good at making her believe a lie. She no longer knew what was real and what was yet another lie. All she could do now was try to uncover the truth for her brother.

  The city lights blurred beyond her tears. Jordan tried to hold onto the strength that had gotten her through so many difficult times in the past. She’d learned long ago to shut out weakness. This world was tough. The weak didn’t survive.

  Jeremy had been weak. What was the point in denying it now? In many ways, he’d become the mirror image of their mother. Her unsteady fingers stroked down the material of the lab coat she still wore. She reached inside the pocket and found the business card Riley had left there and clutched it tight. It gave her a small amount of comfort knowing there was someone to turn to. Lean on.

  He wanted to talk to her in private about what had happened between them and yet she couldn’t even begin to explain tonight’s behavior. Had it just been his strength that drew her to him so recklessly. She’d never experienced such an instant attraction before, not even with Caesar. And yet, she couldn’t accept it any more than she could allow herself to consider the possibility of more with him. Not now. Not at the worst possible time in her life.

  He’d urged her not to trust anyone. Especially those closest to her. Especially Caesar.

  A shiver slipped along her spine. Someone stepping on her grave…

  Her glance slid to Caesar as he maneuvered the car easily through light traffic, his full concentration on the road ahead. God, she desperately wanted to believe his innocence.

  Trust no one. Especially Caesar Santiago…

  She thought she knew everything about Caesar’s family. He’d been honest with her from the beginning, holding nothing back about the business he’d walked away from all those years ago when he left Bogotá and the Santiago’s wealth behind for good. Or so she thought. Had it all been just a lie? Had she been wrong about Caesar from the beginning?

  “Jordan?” Some of the gentleness returned to Caesar’s voice. She realized they were no longer moving. The
Mercedes had rolled to a stop in front of Caesar’s Upper East Side brownstone. His dark eyes grew watchful. “I didn’t think you’d want to go back to your apartment just yet.”

  Slowly, she nodded. He was right. As much as she despised him, she couldn’t think about returning to the apartment she and Jeremy’s shared for so long.

  Jordan got out of the car refusing the hand he offered her for support. She followed him inside, aware of the anger that raged through him.

  Caesar closed the door with annoyance. “Will you at least trust me to take care of all the necessary arrangements?” The brittleness in his tone forewarned her of the argument that was sure to come if she continued to reject him.

  Jordan turned away. She couldn’t look at him. “Yes. Thank you, that’s very generous.”

  “You’re still my fiancé. Jeremy was family.” Bile rose in her throat. She couldn’t speak. “You must be exhausted,” he tried to excuse her coldness. “Why don’t you get some rest?”

  She didn’t look at him. “I am. Exhausted, I am exhausted. I’ll use the guest room.” She waited for him to argue. After a moment, she left him alone.

  She just wanted to wake up and find this was all just a bad dream.

  Trust no one. She couldn’t dismiss Riley’s warning no matter how hard she tried.

  But did she believe the unimaginable? Was Caesar a vicious murderer or simply a casualty of injustice? Monster or victim? Angel or devil? The uncertainty would drive her mad.

  Caesar might be a cheat, and a liar, but was he capable of taking her brother’s life?

  Chapter Four

  “Donovan. Burbeck. In my office. Now.” Riley’d barely gotten one arm free of his jacket when the lieutenant poked his head out of the closet he called an office. A single dirty glass window allowed the LT a bird’s eye view of the squad room. The down side being the Lieu didn’t have an privacy.

  “Shit’s hit the fan.” Frank murmured as he huffed his bulk from the rickety old chair he’d finally managed to maneuver into a somewhat comfortable position.