by Layla Silver
He was cut for the gods, with a delicious trail of dark hair from his stomach and into places beyond. I had no idea what he did to have abs like that, but whatever it was, it was working exceptionally well for him. I placed my hands on him to see if he felt as hard as he looked, and he did.
"You want to take off my jeans," he said, then placed his hand on top of my exploring one.
"Very good," I nodded, letting him guide my hand to his button.
I undid his button and zipper, then helped him out of his shoes first. As I was taking off his jeans, I decided to take off the boxers too and almost gasped when I came face to face with his erection. He was big everywhere it seemed, and I looked up at him and winked. He burst out laughing and drew me up to take my mouth again in a hungry kiss. I touched everywhere that I could, trying to bring him closer.
"What am I thinking now?" I whispered against his mouth, our earlier playfulness replaced by the heat of the moment.
His eyes were closed, and he didn't open them when he answered. "You’re thinking that you’re wearing too many clothes, and you should take them off so I can see you."
"That sounds an awful lot like your thoughts," I teased, kissing along his jaw.
"Do you read minds too?"
I shook my head and smiled, "No."
"Then shut up and do what you’re thinking," he said, then helped me out of my dress as I laughed.
Once I was completely naked, Lincoln looked at me and licked his lips.
"I'm thinking that I should stop talking now and show you what I’m thinking," he said, then proceeded to do exactly that.
Lincoln knelt before me and used one hand to make me part my legs for him. My body was all for whatever he wanted to do, and I willingly followed his lead. He kissed up my thigh softly, like we had all the time in the world, making his way to where I needed him the most. I gasped when he finally got here, licking my swollen nub gently and showing me what I'd been missing all along. Lincoln's tongue made slow circles around my core as if searching for some hidden treasure within me. Each swipe was sure and precise, making my entire body throb with desire. I was sure I would be seeing stars when he was done with me, but he wasn’t going to let me get there anytime soon.
"Lincoln," I half moaned and half pleaded, hoping he would speed up.
I was chasing a feeling I hadn't felt in so long, and it had never been quite like this. While my experience was limited to a quick experiment and one boyfriend, I knew my body well enough to know that there had always been something missing. Well, I had found it now. Lincoln was making love to me with his mouth, and I was enjoying the slow pace. It both frustrated and excited me, and even though my body and mind were at war, they agreed on one thing. Lincoln knew what he was doing.
I gasped when he parted my legs even further before circling my entrance with the tip of his tongue. He looked up at me with hungry eyes, and I could swear they were darker than before, his irises glowing. That's how far gone I was. I was now seeing things. One thing I definitely wasn't imagining was the look of desire on his face; he was enjoying this as much as I was. That turned me on even more, and I grabbed his short hair and held him to me. I bit my lip and rode his face, never taking my eyes off him, daring him to take me to the edge. He winked at me and grabbed my legs to hold me tighter, increasing the speed of his wicked tongue.
"I can't hold on," I whispered, feeling out of breath.
Lincoln moved his attention back to my swollen core, rolling his tongue over it like he had perfected the art. I tugged on his hair when he wrapped his lips around my sensitive nub and sucked, drawing an intense climax out of me. He didn't let up until I started trembling, then moved to my entrance once more to lick away the evidence of his hard work. I saw stars behind my closed eyes, and my whole body refused to cooperate and do anything to hold me up. Luckily, I had a strong man to carry me to the bed.
"You feeling okay?" he asked softly, brushing my hair away from my face with his finger.
I nodded and smiled lazily, which made him grin. Lincoln's whole face lit up, and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. His lashes were so thick they made me jealous, and they framed his hazel eyes perfectly. I could look into those eyes forever, I thought, and I would never get bored. I closed mine when he leaned in to kiss me, letting me taste myself on his tongue.
"I need you," he whispered against my mouth, and I somehow managed to nod.
He kissed down my neck and licked the path between my breasts until he got to my navel. I arched my back when he dipped his tongue and made gentle circles. He made his way back to my breasts and squeezed gently before drawing away to prepare himself. Lincoln was big all over, and I shivered in anticipation. If his foreplay was any measurement of his lovemaking skills, then I was in for a treat. He moved gently and slowly as if he was very aware of his size and didn't want to intimidate me. So I grabbed him for a rough kiss, letting him know that I was ready for him and the time for politeness was over. He smiled against my mouth, and I squeezed his firm butt.
"I'm reading your mind again," he said.
"Then why are you not inside me yet?" I asked with a cheeky smile.
His eyes went dark, and he parted my legs with his, allowing me to feel his hard length. When he finally aligned himself, he pushed in slowly and gently, as if I would break. I moaned as every inch slid inside, massaging my inner walls. Lincoln filled me so perfectly, and I hooked my legs around him to hold him in place. He moaned as he started moving, withdrawing from my warm body then sinking in again. Our bodies moved as if we had been doing this our entire lives.
When Lincoln increased his pace, I dug my nails into his skin, desperately trying to hold on. He owned my body at this moment, and his skin was damp from our lovemaking. He rolled his hips as he moved, igniting parts of me I never even knew existed. I gasped in pleasure and held on even tighter. I was so close again, but I didn't want to leave him behind.
"Lincoln," I warned, the sounds of his body slapping against mine filling the room.
"I'm with you," he groaned, moving even faster.
I called out his name as I fell apart, feeling like every cell in my body was on fire. My toes curled, and I jerked underneath Lincoln's body, wave after wave of pleasure attacking me. I heard him call out my name before he followed me over the edge, and my body gladly welcomed him. We lay like that for a long time, with him breathing heavily into my neck. The last thing I remembered was Lincoln whispering that I was perfect before I fell asleep with a goofy smile on my face.
It was light outside by the time I woke up. I couldn’t remember the last time I had slept so deeply. Looking beside me, I saw that Lincoln was still asleep. The first thing I did was giggle at how ridiculous he looked in my tiny bed. He made everything look so small with his tall frame, but somehow he looked like he was right where he was supposed to be. His hair was all over the place, and I almost smiled in satisfaction at having done that to him. His lips were slightly parted, which made him look adorable even though he was anything but. I realized I could look at him for the rest of the day and never get bored.
My eyes dropped downwards, where he remained uncovered, and I almost woke him up so that I could enjoy him again. But I let him sleep; that could come later. His chest was rising steadily with his breathing, and his strong arms were on either side of him. He had a small paw print tattoo on his right biceps of what appeared to be a Bear’s, but I couldn’t be too sure. Perhaps he had lost a beloved pet when he was younger. I took in the strange markings on the side of his stomach as well and tried to think of what they could mean because they didn’t look like scars, but rather, symbols.
Lincoln was a mixture of sweet and funny, and I really wanted to get to know him better. Everything about him had caught me by surprise, and I had no idea what to do about it. He seemed so nice, and that haunted look he got in his eyes made me want to learn all of his secrets. I wanted to know what his tattoo and the symbols meant. I wanted to know what he liked and what he ha
ted. What he enjoyed for breakfast, what wine he liked, and if he squeezed toothpaste from the bottom or from the top.
Because I already knew the person I wanted to be when I was with him.
I wanted to have great sex like what we had shared all the time. I wanted to be held in strong arms so that I didn’t have to feel like I had to do everything by myself all the time. I wanted to be playful and make silly jokes, not carry the heaviness in my heart wherever I went. I wanted to be the young adult that I was and enjoy the simple things in life. And I wanted to make him laugh all the time so that I could hear that voice over and over again. Most importantly, I wanted to feel free.
Lincoln stirred in his sleep, and I smiled when he straightened, his feet hanging over the edge of the bed. It reminded me of how my life was at the moment, and how I was trying to make a better life for myself. I couldn’t even afford a decent adult-sized bed that would fit a boyfriend if I ever had one. And the last thing I needed was to add another complication in my life right now, even if said complication was tall, handsome, and sweet. I had already signed the contract, and as soon as they found a match, I was going to be impregnated with a stranger’s child. How did one even start that conversation?
‘Hey, I would really like to see where this thing between us can lead, but would you mind if we squeezed potential morning sickness and prenatal appointments somewhere in between our dates? But don’t worry, the baby won’t be yours; it will just be in our lives for nine months, and then we’ll give him or her to the real parents.’
That didn’t sound like any kind of conversation I wanted to have, and I didn’t want to give Lincoln the chance to let me go gently. He was too nice to just be blunt about it, of that I was sure. No, I would make him some breakfast and then let him know that it wouldn’t work.
I got out of bed gently so as not to wake him up and took my phone before leaving. I checked the time as I closed the door and was surprised to see that it was already almost ten. I wondered if Lincoln had to work, but he hadn’t said anything the day before, so I assumed that he had the day off like I did. My phone vibrated and startled me out of my thoughts, and I almost dropped it. I checked the screen before answering.
“Hello?”
“Good day, Miss Daniels, this is Elton from First Class Surrogacy. How are you?” he said.
“I’m well, thank you,” I responded, wondering why they were calling me so soon. Had they found something wrong with my medical exam?
“I have some good news for you: you have been matched with an intended family, and we would like you to come to our offices tomorrow morning just to sign some paperwork.”
I was silent for a while as I took in this piece of news. This was all happening so fast; I had thought it would take a bit of time for the matching process to yield results. It seemed as if some family out there really had someone watching over them and expediting the process for them to have their child.
“Miss Daniels?”
“Sorry, I’m here. Umm, thank you. What time do I have to come in?” I said, a million thoughts running through my mind.
“Nine thirty, please,” he replied.
“Okay, I’ll be there. Thank you.”
He said goodbye before hanging up, and I just stood there for a second as I tried to take it all in. I was going to be responsible for a baby for the next nine months of my life, and I had seen first-hand how toxic relationships could be. I knew that men sucked and that relationships could drain the life out of you. My uncle and aunt’s marriage had shown me that, and I never wanted to be in that situation. Ever. I had to concentrate on this new development in my life and not take a chance on Lincoln.
I felt a pang in my chest but ignored it.
It had been fun, but I knew better than that. I had run away from the only place I had ever called home; my uncle was still haunting me, and I had been dodging my landlord for days. I was a mess. What hope did I have in a relationship? I had just proven that I couldn’t handle myself by sleeping with the first seemingly nice guy I had met.
I walked to the kitchen and remembered midway that I still had no food.
“Damn it!” I groaned, then ran a hand through my hair.
I heard a chuckle behind me, and I turned to face Lincoln. He was wearing his boxers and nothing else, making me even more miserable.
“Is everything okay?”
"Yeah, don't worry about it," I replied, and something must have shown on my face because Lincoln frowned.
He walked towards me, and I took a step back, knowing that if I let him hold me again, then I would totally lose it.
"Dakota?" he said, looking hurt and confused.
It was now or never, I thought. Better to just do it, like ripping off a band-aid.
"Lincoln, I ..." My voice failed me as I thought of the right words to say.
His posture became defensive like he already knew what I was going to say.
"Last night was a mistake," I finally said, not missing the look of hurt that flashed across his face. "I'm not in a good place in my life right now and what happened between us, can't happen again."
His jaw clenched. "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that we can't see each other again, Lincoln. I'm sorry, but I ... just can't."
He was quiet for a long time before he nodded, went back to my room then came back out fully clothed. I walked to the door behind him, and then he silently unlocked it using the key I had left there. He held the doorknob for a heartbeat then turned to face me.
"Goodbye, Dakota." And with that, he turned again and left.
I closed the door and slid down to the floor, burying my face in my hands and just letting it all out. I sat there and cried until I couldn't anymore.
Chapter 9 – Lincoln
I winced when I accidentally hit myself with a hammer. My mind was all over the place lately, and I needed to get out of my head for a little while. Too bad that no matter what I did, I still thought of Dakota at least once every hour. I hadn't even known the woman for that long, but she seemed to have made quite an impression. The kind I didn't need and certainly didn't want right now. She didn't want me and had made it quite clear that it was a mistake. Where had I heard that before?
Oh right ...
'It was a mistake, Linc. I accidentally removed my clothes and fell on top of him, Linc. It's just sex; it doesn't mean I don't still love you.'
Well, that's how it had sounded to me when Rachel had been explaining how everything was all a mistake and she hadn't meant to do it. She never even took responsibility for her actions, but instead made it seem like I was blowing things out of proportion. Honestly, calling something so big a mistake had never made sense to me. But what the hell did I know, except being a common factor in all these mistakes the women around me seemed to make. It just reinforced what I had always thought: this whole love business just wasn’t worth the trouble.
Maybe it wasn’t fair to even think of Rachel and Dakota in the same sentence, because the latter had at least shown some remorse at her actions. But I was still hurt. Just my luck that the first woman I showed an interest in after so long would tell me that she wanted nothing to do with me. And the worst part was that we had shared an amazing night together. I could see in her eyes that she wanted me as much as I did her. Had I really been out of the game for so long that I couldn't tell when someone was interested in me or not? How could it all have been a mistake when we had gotten along so well? I hated questioning myself and going through what had happened over and over again.
I had been fine on my own for quite a while now, keeping my distance from all women, humans and shifters alike. I was making excellent progress on my house, I was doing great at work, and now I was expecting a child. Everything was going on well for me. I didn't need this unnecessary stress. It was making me moodier than usual, which Theo had pointed out earlier at work.
I sighed and took out my phone, sending a quick text to Kyle that I would make it to the party. The clan was throwi
ng a party to celebrate Josh’s birthday. Josh was one of the clan members. Everyone liked and supported each other in my new clan, and they never ran out of excuses to throw a good party. I never ran out of excuses to avoid them, just like I had turned down the invitation to this one. But I felt like showing up and having a few beers with the guys would take my mind off a certain human.
I smiled when Kyle's response came in a second later. 'Claire said to wear dark jeans, a white shirt, and a blazer.' He really had found his perfect mate in Claire because they were both impossible. But they were the closest thing that I had to a family, and I took their teasing in stride.
Now that I had plans for the night, I quickly finished my work and put away my tools and materials. I shaved before getting into my shower, shampooing my hair first then washing the rest of my body. I felt the tension in my body begin to fade as the water massaged my skin, and I knew that I would be just fine. All I needed was my child, and then I would spend my days teaching him or her our shifter customs and showing him how amazing the Bear life could be. Maybe then I could even stomach going to parties and taking him on play dates with other cubs in the clan. Everything was going to be perfect; no woman was going to ruin my happiness for me.
I dressed as Claire had instructed, wearing my best pair of jeans and finding a decent black blazer in the back of my closet. When Kyle laid his eyes on me about twenty minutes later, he burst into laughter.
"Well, well, don't you clean up nice?" he teased, extending his hand for a fist bump that I met. I had just been congratulating Josh with his birthday, but he had already turned away to talk to a woman. She was gorgeous, I could see that, but I wasn’t interested.
Kyle was holding a glass of wine in his other hand, and I raised a brow at him.
"Are you supposed to be drinking that?" I asked, then looked around for his wife. "And does Claire know?"
It was one thing for him to have a beer when he came to my house, but another for him to drink in front of his wife. The latter was just not done.