For Love & Torture_A Submissives’ Secrets Novel

by Michelle Love

  “Will she sleep in her own bedroom?”

  “No, we’ll share a bed.” Any normal married couple shared a bed, so would we.

  “How about the forms of play you will be delving into, Mr. Simmons?”

  “There will be bondage, sensory deprivation, and spanking with hands and paddles. Nothing more needs to be in the contract. This time around I need full cooperation more so than physical domination.”

  “So there will be more mental domination then?” Her question bothered me for some reason.

  I didn’t want to think about mentally harming the young woman. But in the end, what would you call what I wanted to do? I wanted her to do as I said at all times. I supposed it was mental domination. “Yes, it will be more mental than anything else.”

  That didn’t set well with me. In my opinion, the body was almost a separate entity from the mind. Things happen to our bodies all the time to scar and mar what was once perfect flesh. The skin that’s broken is tougher when it heals, making it difficult to reinjure the area. And minds are like that too. Only when there’s a scar on it, it changes how a person acts and feels.

  I didn’t want to mentally damage Asia. But I did plan on making her do what I said to. And that was the first time I realized that what I was doing would leave its mark on her. If not on her flesh, then on her mind. Her soul, itself.

  Our marriage might be fake, but she’d remember me forever. Our time together would be a thing that would shape and mold the future Asia Jones. Suddenly a tremendous amount of responsibility was felt, weighing me down like nothing had before.

  It made me wonder if that’s what a real marriage felt like. Did one bear the burden of the other through it all? Was that what held marriages together, the combination of responsibility to your partners physical and mental health and happiness?

  Did I care of Asia was happy?

  I had never cared if any of the others were. I cared if they were happy with the sex or the type of play we were doing. But did their happiness ever even occur to me?

  I couldn’t recall a time when it had. But there I was, thinking about the happiness of a girl I’d never met. All I knew about her was she was as pretty as a picture, and her voice was as sweet as honey. And she was going to me mine.

  “It almost sounds as if you’re doing a marriage fantasy. Is that what taking this sub is about, Mr. Simmons?”

  “Um. Well…” She saw right through it. Would Asia? And if she did, would she still sign the contract? “It’s a little like one. I tell you what, throw in kneeling when I enter the room, but only when we’re completely alone.” That made it sound more like a normal contract.

  I didn’t want to risk Asia backing out on me at the last minute. Not only did I desperately need her as I’d dug myself into a hole with my lies about being married, but I wanted her. I wanted Asia more than I’d ever wanted anyone.

  And that was a thing that was beginning to bother me. Was I going to let a woman and my need for her control me?

  Asia

  From the moment I stepped onto the plane, it was like everything wasn’t real. The people on the plane who chattered away. The stewardess who gave us all the speech about what to do if the plane crashed. The man who was sitting next to me who smelled like cabbage and sausages. Nothing seemed real.

  Then I seemingly floated off the plane and made my way through the terminal until I found a man who had my name on a sign he was holding. I had one carry-on bag and my purse. I was told I didn’t need to bring anything more than my personal products, my birth control, and my identification. My Dom would provide everything else for me.

  It was like a fairytale. One where I was the princess who was on her way to meet her prince. We’d marry and have a happily ever after life.

  Only that wasn’t the case at all. I was to be submissive to a man I didn’t know. I was to allow him to do things to my body I’d never let other men do. And all of this was because I needed money.

  The root of all evil, indeed!

  As I rode in the back of the car that took me to The Dungeon of Decorum, I thought about the man I was going to meet. He and I didn’t talk much after our first phone call. It was Isabel who called me and told me about the plans. Jett had given me one call just before I got on the plane.

  He said he was excited to be meeting me and he hoped we’d get along well. I assured him we would. I wasn’t about to do a single thing to make our time together hard or unhappy for him. I was there to please him and please him I would.

  I’d studied up on sexual acts. I’d practiced oral sex on a cucumber. I was sure in my ability to please my Dom. He’d be getting a virgin, but one who’d studied up for him.

  I hoped he would like that.

  There were so many things I hoped for. I hoped he’d be nice. I hoped he let me in, even if it was just a bit. I hoped he liked me.

  That was the biggest fear I had. That he wouldn’t like me.

  The car pulled off the highway and went out to the very edge of town. We took a turn, and all I saw was a parking garage and a long driveway. As we made our way up it, I began to think things were moving too fast.

  In no time I’d be seeing Jett, and things would begin to feel real. Maybe too real!

  Panic began to stab me all over my body. Anxiety took me over, and I held my hand over my pounding heart as if that would steady it. My breathing became erratic, and I broke into a sweat.

  The car came to a stop, and I tried, desperately to calm myself down. There was a bottle of wine in a chiller, and I opened it and took a long drink. A thing that was so not like me. Just as I was placing it back in the chiller, the driver opened my door. “Miss Jones, we’ve arrived at our destination.”

  “Yes, yes, of course, we have!” I shimmed across the long leather seat and grabbed my purse and bag then got out of the car.

  There was no building. I half expected to see a castle. Instead, I saw what looked like a small shack with a red door on it. The walkway up to it was long. Each step I took made my heart beat a bit faster.

  This was it. I was really going through with it. I was handing my body over to a man for three months for money and things. I stopped midstride as my mind spun out of control.

  What was I doing? I couldn’t possibly do this!

  I wasn’t this person. I was a strong, smart female with goals and achievements. I wasn’t some empty-headed woman who was out to make a quick dime.

  If I wasn’t that woman, then what the hell was I doing there?

  I didn’t belong there. I knew I didn’t. I wasn’t one of them. I was an imposter. I wouldn’t be able to please a man the way the rest of the subs could. I’d never live up to any of the other subs Jett Simmons had ever had.

  He was a true Dom, in my opinion. Maybe not the kind who enjoy bringing a lot of pain into the situation, but he liked to rule. I could tell it by the tone of his voice and the look in his eye. Even if it was only a snapshot of the man. It was there, buried deep in his sea green eyes. He was the ruler. The supreme master. And I’d be his little love slave. A thing I didn’t even know how to be.

  My stomach rumbled as my guts twisted with more anxiety than I’d ever experienced. I felt like I might faint. I was breathing all weird as black began to tunnel my vision.

  I had to leave. I couldn’t go through with it. I just couldn’t!

  Somewhere in the distance, the sound of a car filtered in. I was standing as still as a stone as I heard it stop and a door opened. “Asia, is that you?”

  I turned so slowly. I thought it had to be a dream. I must’ve passed out and was lying on the cement sidewalk, dreaming about Jett Simmons. Or was it real?

  He was wearing an expensive black suit. His golden brown hair was bouncing around his broad shoulders as he made his way to me. Pulling his aviator-style shades away, his green eyes pierced me. A smile curved his chiseled lips. “Asia, it is you.”

  “Mr. Simmons?” I knew it was him, I just didn’t know what the hell else to say.

&
nbsp; I was all ready to leave. I was ready to throw in the towel. But as I looked into the shiny depths of his gorgeous eyes, I found peace in them. I found safety in them. I’d be safe with the man. I could tell that then.

  “Jett. Call me by my name, please.” His strong and muscular arm came around my narrow shoulders, enclosing me in the safest embrace I’d ever felt.

  My stomach stopped bubbling. My mind stopped moving so fast. It was as if time was standing still as we looked at one another in person for the first time. He was magnificent. Everything about the man screamed power. I didn’t need a contract to do what he told me to. I’d have done it anyway, he exuded that much force.

  And what was so odd was that it turned me on in a way I didn’t know was possible. My body was full of sharp stabbing pricks of electricity. His hand ran down my arm then he grasped my hand and pulled it to his lips. They were the color of caramel nougat. They looked delicious, and I wondered how long he’d wait to kiss me. I hoped not long. I wanted to taste the man so badly it was insane!

  “Jett, yes sir, I’ll call you that.” He kissed the top of my hand then, and it made my knees weak.

  “Good girl. I have to say you’re natural demeanor impresses me, immensely. Are you ready to get inside and sign the contract?” He nodded toward the red door. “It’s just inside and down the stairs. I’d rather not take you all the way into the club. What happens inside that red door is not for innocent eyes, I’m afraid.”

  “I believe you. I was about to chicken out when you came up.”

  “Then it’s a good thing I arrived when I did, isn’t it? Are you okay with it now? You don’t want to back out, do you?” He ran the tips of his fingers up my arm, over my shoulder, then to my chin where he held it, gently. His eyes darted back and forth, searching mine. “Because now that I’ve seen you and touched you, Asia, the hunger I’ve had has turned ravenous. I’d mourn the loss of what could’ve been for the rest of my life if you changed your mind about me.”

  “I want to be yours, Jett,” the words slipped off my tongue without any will of my own. I did want to be his. I wanted it more than I’d ever wanted anything.

  In a split second, everything had changed, and the smile he gave me made my heart sing. Taking my hand, he led me to the red door. When he took me inside, everything in my life changed.

  Jett

  When my eyes landed on Asia, it was as if time was standing still. She was standing there as if she’d been waiting for me to arrive. She wore a cream-colored, sleeveless dress with two-inch black heels. Her hair moved like ribbons in the gentle breeze. Her natural beauty was enhanced with just enough makeup.

  I had to pull my sunglasses away so I could take her in completely. Her lips were stained ruby red, her cheeks a pale pink. Her doe-like eyes took me in from head to toe as she wore an impressed expression. She was quiet as she waited, not shouting and throwing her hands up the way a lot of females did.

  Elegance and demure beauty, along with fantastic posture, gave her an air of aristocracy. Like a princess, she waited for her prince to join her. I was far from a prince, a thing she looked like she deserved.

  Would she like me?

  And why was I caring so damn much about that?

  The moment my hand touched her, it felt as if thousands of needles were pricking my skin. I hoped I was playing it cool, not letting her know how much she was affecting me.

  Staying in control with her was hard. I wanted to pick her up, toss her over my shoulder and take her right back to the car and devour her. Her rosebud lips were quivering a bit, and I yearned to kiss the nerves away for her.

  I wondered how long I could wait before I kissed her.

  How long would I wait before I took her body to heights she couldn’t possibly comprehend? How long would I have to wait?

  A foot shorter than me, she fit neatly against my side when I hugged her. She admitted to me she’d had second thoughts. I was more than overjoyed that all that doubt seemed to vanish with my presence. She could be what I wanted. I could tell that already.

  We made our way into the club where I took her right to Isabel’s office to get the contract signed. I couldn’t make her mine fast enough!

  As we walked down the dark stairwell and into the lighted hallway, I saw one of the club’s founders coming out of Isabel’s office. “Is that you, Mr. S.?”

  “It is.” I let go of Asia to shake Grant Jamison’s hand. “Asia, this is one of the founders of this prestigious club. You may call him, Mr. J.”

  Grant took Asia’s hand and kissed the top of it. “Asia, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I heard you’ll be entering into a contract with this man here.”

  “Yes, sir.” Asia’s eyes darted to mine then back to his. “You’re a founder of The Dungeon of Decorum?”

  “I am the primary founding father.” Grant glowed with pride as he pushed his hand through his salt and pepper hair.

  Asia wore a curious expression. “What made you want to do a business like this?”

  Grant and I looked at her with surprise. I didn’t expect that out of her and apparently neither did he. But he answered her anyway, “I had a need that wasn’t being fulfilled. It’s not easy to find partners to do the things we do. One can’t simply head out to one of the local taverns and pick up a girl, take her home and string her up then flog her until she’s going into another state of mind.”

  “No, I suppose one can’t do that.” Asia nodded then looked at me. “You won’t string me up, will you?”

  I grinned and moved my hand down to her round ass, leaving it there. “I’m not into that kind of play, it’s too time-consuming for my tastes. You’ll find out what I like, and I’ve read your list of acceptable kinks, you’ll be fine, I promise you that.” Her ass fit perfectly in my hand, just like everything else about her was working for me. I was growing impatient and wanted the paperwork out of the way. I wanted Asia alone with me to explore each other more deeply.

  Hesitation filled her face, and Grant noticed it. “Miss Jones, this is a thing you want to do, isn’t it? I mean, the reason we have this club is to make sure all the members, male and female, are doing things they want to. Have you read up on BDSM at all?”

  She shook her head. “No, sir. I thought it best to let my Dom teach me what he wanted me to know.”

  Moving my hand off her ass to rest it on the small of her back, I whispered, “Great answer. And I’m glad you thought that way.”

  Grant seemed a bit worried about her as he placed his hand on her shoulder. “We don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to. If you feel like you’ve jumped into something that you feel is over your head, please let your Dom know that. He’s not out to hurt you in any way.” He moved his eyes to mine. “She’s not a typical sub. You go easy on her.” Then he looked back at Asia. “If you’re absolutely positive that’s what you want, Miss Jones.”

  She looked at me then smiled. “It is what I want. I feel safe with him, Mr. J. and Isabel told me I can make one phone call if I ever want out of the contract. I’m not worried at all. I want to do this with him. Thank you for your concern, sir.”

  Nothing she said could’ve pleased me more. “There you have it, Mr. J. she’s ready and willing. And I’ll treat her very well, you can rest assured of that.”

  He clapped me on the back, sending us in to see Isabel to finally make things secure between us. Isabel stood up to greet us, shaking our hands and gesturing for us to take the two leather chairs that were in front of her Cherrywood desk. “You two look like you’re already getting along well.”

  “I think we are.” I nudged Asia with my shoulder. “How about you?”

  Her eyes were soft as she looked at me with only a hint of a smile. “I think we are too.”

  “That’s very good to hear.” Isabel pushed the contract toward me first. “Please read this over, Mr. Simmons. I want to be sure I’ve put everything you wanted into it.”

  I looked the one-page contract over and saw that it had all I
wanted on it. Then I handed it to Asia. “Your turn to read our contract, Asia.”

  She murmured, “Our contract.” I watched her as she read it and nodded. “Yes, this is what he and I have discussed. I agree to it all.”

  Isabel handed her a pen, and she signed it as I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding in. Then I signed it too, and we were a done deal.

  For the next three months, anyway.

  “The money will be held in our bank in an escrow account for you, Miss Jones. If either of you decides you want out of the contract, it will be up to the Dom to decide if you get any of the funds he set aside for you. Do you understand that, Miss Jones?” Isabel moved the financial page to Asia, and she signed it too. Isabel smiled at me. “You’ve been very generous, Mr. Simmons. I do hope you two find what you’re looking for.”

  I didn’t have to hope. I knew I’d found the right woman to play my wife. And she already exhibited signs of being a perfect sub for me. I wasn’t sure how I got so lucky, but I felt like I’d won the lottery.

  Getting up to leave, I took Asia by the hand and went out to where the car was waiting to take us back to the airport. “Is all the flying bothering you?”

  She shook her head. “Not so far. We only have a few hours back to New York, right?”

  “I chartered a private jet. It’ll be a couple of hours, and in the meantime, we’ll enjoy dinner in the air. I’ve ordered lobster and steaks.” I opened the door for her and out we went into the still sunny early evening.

  “That’s thoughtful of you.”

  The driver hurried to open the back door of the car to let us in. She slid in, and I took the seat next to her. I gave her some room, although I wanted to be as close to her as I could get.

  I wasn’t sure when I was going to give her the news about the fake marriage and how I expected her to act about it. She seemed up for anything in a laid back kind of way.

  Surely, she wouldn’t hate the idea.

  Would she?

  Thank you for reading Filthy Commitments