xXATHINLINE EBOOKXx-docx

by Gianna Boiani

  With a scream, John put his hands around Silas' throat and squeezed as hard as he could. A faint angelic smile played over Silas' lips and his eyes were at peace. They no longer contained anger or hatred. Silas had accepted his fate and he welcomed it. As John continued to squeeze he saw Silas' lips mouth, "Thank you", as his eyes closed and he drifted away, free from this Earth, free to finally meet his Maker. John let go of his throat, got up, took one last glance at what he did, then walked out.

  CHAPTER NINETY-SEVEN

  As John drove away from the lab, he realized what he needed to do. He drove straight to The Alibi, entered and took his usual seat. "Hey John," Red said as he placed a Brooklyn in front of him.

  "Thank you, Red."

  "Hell, John, What's up? You look like you have seen a ghost." "Red, I might not be around for awhile. I wanted to let you

  know, say goodbye and ask a favor of you," John said.

  "Oh." Red looked at John and knew. They had developed a chemistry, a way to communicate without saying any words and Red had a damn good idea what John had done. "I understand, John. I hope everything works itself out."

  "One way or another, I promise you Red, when I can, I will be back. Whether it is here or somewhere else, I will find you. You are a true friend and there are very few of those through life."

  "You are correct, John. In life, we rarely find true friends. I look forward to being reunited at some point, if it shakes down that way."

  John then confessed to Red the specifics of everything that he had done. They continued to talk and even had a few laughs until it was time for John to go. Red came out from behind the bar, gave John a hug and said, "You take care, John. Not that you think it will help but I will pray for you anyway."

  "Thank you," John said.

  "What was the favor you wanted to ask me?" Red said.

  "Keep an eye on my wife and children. I would feel much more comfortable knowing that I have you looking over them for me."

  "Of course. You have my word," Red answered. With that, John was off, not knowing if he would ever see his friend again.

  CHAPTER NINETY-EIGHT

  The following morning, John sat his children down for a talk while Julie was still in bed, sleeping. "Gianna, Ryann, I need to tell you two something and I need you both to be strong and grown up, okay?"

  Ryann looked at his father and said, "Okay."

  Gianna wouldn't be so easy. Being older, she had a better sense of knowing when something bad was going to be said to her. "Why, Daddy? Why do we need to be strong?" she said.

  "Daddy might not be around for awhile. There is something that I have to do, something that I need to take care of that may take awhile."

  "But why, Daddy? Where are you going?" Ryann said as tears filled his eyes. Gianna didn't say a word. She looked at her father as tears streamed down her face.

  "Someday, when you two are older, I will explain everything to you in detail. But, for now, I need you to be strong. I need you both to know that I love you deeply and don't you ever doubt that." Gianna, steadily crying, got up, rushed upstairs into her room and slammed the door behind her.

  The racket woke Julie up and she walked in and said, "John, what's going on?"

  "We need to talk," John said as he led her back into the bedroom. John informed Julie of his secrets and soon after she came out, gathered the children and left without saying anything more. John just sat there, alone, his face in his hands, not knowing if he would ever see his family again.

  CHAPTER NINETY-NINE

  John walked into the station and straight into Captain Johnson's office. "John, go home. I want you to take the rest of the time..."

  John interrupted the captain in mid-sentence. "We need to talk. Meet me in interrogation room #1 in five minutes." John walked out leaving the captain with a perplexed look on his face. Five minutes later the captain walked into the room with John waiting in the suspect's chair. "Close and lock the door, please," John said. The captain did as he was told, then sat down across from his protege. "John, what the hell is this about?"

  "I need you to listen until I am done and then I need you to do what is right, what is just."

  "Okay, Go on," the captain said.

  "Last night I strangled Silas Alvah to death. He killed Todd, Jacqueline, and their unborn child. He was there the night they died. I have proof of this on Todd's cell phone. He confessed to me that he killed them right before I ended his life."

  The captain's complexion turned a very pale white and sweat started to bead up on his face. "John, what the fuck are you telling me? Wait. If you had Todd's phone containing evidence, why didn't you turn it in?”

  "Because I knew you wouldn't let me handle the case. I knew you would not let me be part of it, to protect me," John said.

  "What's the difference? With the evidence, we would have had a slam-dunk conviction."

  "Yes, but then the piece of shit would have lived," John said.

  "Let me think for a bit." The captain said as he got up and walked around the room for what seemed like an eternity. He then sat back down and said, "Okay, It's a crime of passion. Second degree."

  "Captain, hold on..." John said but the captain kept talking, right over John's voice.

  "First offense. You might get ten years but with your sparkling background, I'm sure it can be bargained down to two or three years..."

  "Captain..."

  "With the understanding of what he did to your friends, a fellow cop, and your partner, we can get it dramatically reduced to the absolute minimum."

  "Sir...stop. I wasn't finished. Listen to me. I've lost my way. I'm not sure where that line is anymore. That thin line of right or wrong. Seeing all the useless deaths, the suffering of innocents, has worn me down over the years. I've lost my moral compass. I thought it was the right way, the sound way, to handle this chaotic world, but I'm not sure anymore. I will leave it to the court and the people to decide. Sir, Silas Alvah was not my first kill. I ended the lives of Robert Jacobs, James Corell, Seth Boyd and Harvey Mendes. Sir, I am the vigilante killer. I wanted them to feel what their victims felt. I didn't want them to ever get the chance to repeat what they had done again. I wanted to keep innocent people safely out of their reach and this was the only way to do that without a risk of them getting free again. I wanted to bring them to justice, to give their victims the revenge they all deserved. Sir, I don't know if it was the right thing to do, but sitting here now, I wouldn't change it. I would do it all again. If I need to pay for what I've done, so be it. I am willing to do that. But I'd do it all again, exactly the same way."

  The captain sat there and looked at John for what seemed to be an eternity. He then got up, paced the room, then sat back down across from John, still speechless. Finally, he got up and walked out, without uttering a word. John assumed that a few of his brethren, his brothers, would be in to arrest him and take him away. John waited. No arrest came. No captain. Nothing.

  Finally, the door opened and the captain walked back in and sat down. "Although I feel your actions were wrong and you have lost your way as a detective and a cop, I am keeping this between you and me. I know what you are made of. You are a hero. From the first time I saw you put your life on the line to save an innocent woman, I knew it. I can't arrest you. I won't let them arrest you and convict you. In the structure of the law, what you did was a crime, but somewhere deep inside my soul, what you did gives me a bright, healthy feeling. Hell, maybe I have been doing this too long as well. I will cover up the Silas Alvah killing. This is my decision, not yours. It is over."

  "Sir, I don't know if that is the correct way to handle this..."

  "John, do you ever want to see your children again? They need you. It's over. My decision is made. This world is a better place with you in it. This world is a better place with you in it as a free man. It's over..."

  "I will resign immediately," John said. The captain got up and walked out. Soon after, John did the
same. As he walked past his desk and out the front door for the last time, he thought about his job, his life, the only life that he had known for the last twenty years. He turned and looked back one last time at the station, then got into his truck and drove away.

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED

  John stayed home much of the following week. All he did was sleep, eat and replay the course of events from the last month over and over again in his mind. He missed his children and his wife but he knew that the worst thing he could do right now was to call her. She needed space and time. Time to organize her thoughts and feelings. She may very well be gone forever. He would have to accept that. He had told her everything, all of the killings, including the hows and whys. He saw it. The look in her eyes before she left. Fear. Fear and confusion. Fear and confusion that the man she thought he was might not have been real. Fear of what was left to take his place. John replayed over and over in his mind everything he did, the decisions that he made. Every time he came to the same conclusion: He would do it all over again. He didn't know if that meant he was a hero, a monster or something in between. He didn't know if it simply meant he was losing his mind. John needed to get out. Get out and talk to someone. He knew just who he needed to talk to.

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED-ONE

  The first thing Red saw as he walked out of the back room behind the bar was his friend. "John!" He howled as he walked over and shook his hand. "Welcome back."

  "Thank you, Red. I told the captain everything. Everything I have done. He wants to bury it all," John said.

  "I see. How do you feel about that?"

  "I am not sure how I feel. I am not sure if the things I have done were good or evil, right or wrong. Every time I think about it I come to the same conclusion: I would do it all again, without changing a thing. But, I don't know if my mind is right. I have been dealing with evil, pure evil, for over twenty years. It takes its toll."

  "Understood. That can be very traumatic. Over the years, I can understand how it would affect your thoughts and emotions. John, I personally think that you are a hero. I know there are people that would disagree with me, but let me ask you this...what if you had let any of them live and they did it again? Murdered a family? Raped a woman? Abducted a child? How would that have made you feel?"

  "I would have felt that I was responsible."

  "Exactly. So stop second-guessing yourself. Stop second-guessing what you did. These people were not going to change. Their type of evil is embedded in their blood and DNA. No amount of rehabilitation or punishment would have ever changed that. Some may say it wasn't your decision to make, but I will tell you this, my friend... I trust your judgment much more than our legal system."

  "Thank you for saying that. I resigned Red," John said. "I can't continue to do my job this way. But, I also couldn't do it by the book. Their book. I have seen it fail society too many times. I don't want to be a part of that anymore. I don't want the guilt of an innocent being hurt by a monster that should have never been free to begin with."

  "I understand," Red replied.

  "Julie left me. She took the kids."

  "I'm sorry. Give her time, John."

  "Well that, my friend, I now have plenty of," John replied before getting up and walking out the door.

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED-TWO

  John heard a baby crying as he entered the long, dark hallway. At the end was a lone door leading to a secluded room. He heard the wind blow against the trees outside as the storm rolled in. As he walked through the hallway the floorboards squeaked under every step. The baby's cries became louder as he approached the door. John reached for the doorknob as thunder roared and lightning lit up the dark hallway. Rain started to pound the roof as he turned the knob and pushed the door open. In the corner of the room, a man stood with his back to John, in front of a crib containing the crying baby. In the darkness, John could see the man slowly turn his head around as the baby screamed louder now. John could faintly make out the whiteness of his face as his head turned fully around to look at John. John took a step forward, then another. Now he stood about ten feet from the man. Suddenly a flash of lightning lit up the room followed by the loudest crack of thunder he had ever heard. What the lightning had lit up in that room chilled John to the bone. The man was as white as a ghost except for the red blood dripping from his lips down off his chin and pooling on the floor at his feet. He had black, beady eyes that pierced through John's soul. An evil, crooked smile came across the man's lips as John stepped forward to peer into the crib. What he saw made him cry out in horror. The baby's hand had been chewed completely off by the man who was now laughing with his head thrown straight back. He laughed louder as the baby's screams echoed through the old, dark, empty house...

  John woke and quickly sat up, startled and disoriented. Sweat rolled off his face as he got up and headed for the bathroom. These types of nightmares had become more frequent over the years as keeping the innocents safe had become more challenging and weighed heavier on his soul. He splashed cold water on his face and then glanced in the mirror at his reflection. The lines of stress had become clearer over the years. John shut the light off and crawled back into bed. Thoughts of his family and how much he missed them took control of his brain as he drifted off, back to sleep.

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED-THREE

  Thursday, November 27...

  "Red, where do you think we go when we die? Heaven? Or, maybe we get another chance to live again? Are we just put in the ground forever, in a cold, dark prison, for our bodies to decay in? Gone forever?”

  It was Thanksgiving Day. John had invited Red over to eat and watch football. They had picked up turkey dinners from a local restaurant and brought them back to John's house to eat.

  Red looked up, startled by the morbidity of the question. Red was the type of man who was rarely ever startled. A small hint of a smile appeared at the corners of his mouth as he said, "You do realize, being a bartender, I get this type of talk often. Usually right before the person falls off the barstool and I have to call them a cab." Red then turned a bit more serious, gave a small sigh, and said, "Where do we go? I have no idea. The answer to that question is different to everyone. I will tell you this: what is important isn't where we go when we die but to truly live while we are still alive. Live with the mindset that every day could be your last. Hug your children every chance that you get. Kiss your wife more than you currently do. Live life to the fullest because we all have eternity to be dead. I have met many that, though alive, have already died, in their heart. In their soul. Do not let your spirit die. That is what keeps us going, keeps us young, makes us special. The fire that burns in our hearts is what makes us alive and unique. Protect that from everything in this world that works to extinguish it."

  They finished eating, sat and watched the game in silence until John finally said, "Red, I've been thinking. How would you like to open a restaurant together?"

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED-FOUR

  John was floating in that wonderful, peaceful zone between sleep and consciousness when he heard a sound he welcomed and had been waiting for: a key in the front door followed by the door opening and the patter of multiple footsteps. He sat up as quickly as he could as the footsteps increased in tempo up the stairs, down the hallway, and into his bedroom as his children ran in and yelled, "Daddy, daddy!" They jumped up onto the bed and into his arms. That snapshot in time, that span of moments when he saw them enter the bedroom and jump into his arms, was the happiest moment of his life. Losing your children can shatter the foundation of your soul. Getting them back feels just as powerful. John squeezed them against him and held them there, soaking up their innocent love. They finally pulled away, eager to get back to their own bedrooms. Julie then walked in and sat down on the edge of the bed. "John, let me say a few things without your response. I need to get this out, uninterrupted."

  "Okay," John said.

  "The things that you told me scared me. I wasn't sure what to feel or how t
o react. I had multiple emotions running through my heart at the same time. Now that I have had time to organize them, understand them, I need to tell you something. What is inside of you that made you do those things is part of the reason that I fell in love with you. The desire, the need to protect innocence at whatever cost. The courage to do what you think is right, for the sake of the innocent, regardless of what the bureaucrats think. I have come to the conclusion that what scared me wasn't your decision to do these things, but the fear that I know I do not possess the courage to do them myself. You do. That makes you a special man. You very well may have saved innocent lives by doing what you did. You are a hero. You are my hero and I love you." John didn't say a word. He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her onto the bed and kissed her, passionately. He was overjoyed that his family was home where they belonged and that his wife accepted him for who he is, inside, in his soul, and she wouldn't want to change that in any way.

  CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED-FIVE

  Sunday, December 19...

  "Let's get that one!" Ryann yelled excitedly as he scampered over to a huge, lone tree that stood apart from the rest. The family was at a tree farm, early in the morning, choosing a Christmas tree to bring home. "Isn't that one too big John?" Julie asked.

  "Nope. A bit of a trim here and there and it will fit perfectly. "Gianna, what do you think?"

  "I love it!" she said. On the way home, it started to snow, lightly at first, then much heavier as it began to accumulate. John promised the children that after they decorated the tree, he would take them sledding. Few things in life excite children as much as a snow day, especially when their father is home with them. When they arrived home after sledding, John presented the children with their first Christmas gift, a three-month-old Alaskan Malamute puppy. The children decided to name him Simba because his wolf-like mane reminded them of a lion. Later that night, John watched them fall asleep with the puppy curled up between them.