Open Wounds

by Camille Taylor

  Mascara coated eyelashes fluttered at the charge.

  “I couldn’t do it anymore. I wanted to forget and you wouldn’t let me. It was in every word and gesture. I was ashamed and embarrassed and every time I looked into your eyes I saw sympathy.”

  She swallowed against the lump in her throat. “What did you expect? It didn’t just affect you. It almost killed me too, watching you suffer, knowing I couldn’t do a damn thing to help you. That I wasn’t there to protect you when you needed me.”

  She slammed her fist against the bag hard, which moved only slightly with Kellie holding it still. She took a step back to compensate for the force of the blow.

  They had been friends since they were children. Back then, Kellie had been the ambitious one and she had simply followed. Or rather had been dragged since Kellie refused to leave her behind. Then their world had changed overnight and Kellie had pushed her away. Not knowing what else to do, she’d allowed it. It was her biggest regret. She didn’t make friends easily, and due to her job and the hours she kept, along with her personality, she could count the number of friends she had on one hand.

  She smacked the bag harder. “You just left. No explanation. Nothing. I was left wondering what the hell I did wrong, thinking you blamed me for being hurt.”

  “Mia, I’m so sorry. I had no idea you felt that way.”

  “It doesn’t matter now.”

  “Of course it does,” Kellie said as she tapped her fingers against the thick plastic coating underneath her hand. “We’re going to be working together. We need to resolve our issues.”

  “Just like that, huh?” Her mouth twitched into a smile.

  “It’s only you, Mia, who makes it difficult, you know.”

  She shrugged and didn’t deny it. Denying it would be futile since it was the truth, but it wasn’t something she could easily get over. Hell, it had been twelve years but that night still haunted her. Kellie wasn’t the only one who had lost something. She had also lost a good friend.

  “I accept my actions have caused irreparable damage but I want to make it right. Or at least near enough to. Come on, Mia, let’s go hash this out Donovan Style. Don’t look so surprised. I read your file. Plus I know you. If there was anything that you couldn’t fix, you’d fester until an opportunity came along to cut loose and let it all out.”

  She moved to the boxing ring in the centre of the room before turning around. She raised an eyebrow and motioned with her hand towards the ring. Amelia frowned before following her.

  “Cut the crap, Kel, you know I’ll wipe the floor with you in a matter of minutes.”

  Kellie climbed through the ropes into the ring and turned back to face her.

  “That confident, are we? My, you have an ego. I bet you’ve been dreaming of kicking my arse for years,” she teased. “Well here am I. Come on, take your anger out on me. Let me take away your demons.”

  “Don’t push me. I might take you up on that offer,” Amelia warned, noticing they’d caught the attention of some of the officers working out. Some were even inching closer in hopes of overhearing. There was nothing more interesting than Amelia Donovan being challenged by a perky blonde. She didn’t plan on being anyone’s entertainment.

  Kellie shook her head, donning on a pair of gloves.

  “Are you afraid you’ll hurt me? You can’t, no one can…not anymore. You need this. Hell, I need this. Relax, it’ll be a fair fight. I’ve been practicing. What have you got to lose except maybe their respect?” She motioned to the flock of men moving towards them, eagerly exchanging bets. “Let’s work off some of that aggression of yours. It’s not healthy to keep it bottled up. Believe me, you’ll feel better once we’re done.”

  “She wouldn’t be Donovan if she wasn’t aggressive, that’s what we love about her,” someone said from the crowd. It was followed by male laughter.

  “You’re just pissed she wouldn’t sleep with you, Kurt,” another said.

  Amelia rolled her eyes and climbed into the ring. “You always knew how to make a spectacle of yourself,” she said. “Well, there’s no backing down now. Not if you want to save face.”

  Kellie appeared unconcerned. “I was never planning on backing down.”

  “I’ve got twenty on Donovan,” Officer Kovak shouted to no one in particular.

  “I wouldn’t be so quick to make that assessment, Kovak,” a familiar voice called out. Nick Doyle appeared ringside. “The blonde packs a punch.”

  Amelia huffed out a deep breath. Could this get any worse? She was never going to hear the end of this.

  “Don’t cry to me, Kel, if you break a nail.”

  “So long as you don’t cry to me if you break something else.”

  They faced off, the sounds of the men surrounding them dying off as she centred herself. As far as she was concerned, they were alone.

  Kellie parted her stance, making it wider as she moved at an angle to improve her chances of staying on her feet. Amelia mimicked her action, having spent time in the ring and out of one herself. She knew how to fight—fairly and unfairly—and knew all the dirty tricks to use against her opponent should it come down to that. Which it usually did when she was up against a street criminal.

  Amelia waited, her vision narrowed, her mind moving into survival mode. She was no longer fighting a game with an old friend; she was fighting a threat. She patiently waited for Kellie to make the first move, hoping to manoeuvre her into doing what she wanted. She didn’t have to wait long.

  Kellie’s first hit was direct and hard, even blocking her attack and pushing her back a few steps. Amelia took a deep breath before going on the attack, sparring with her across the ring, back and forth. Each jab and punch was a direct hit, designed to hurt and demobilise. This was not a friendly match; the competitors fought for a championship, and they both treated it as such.

  Hit, block, hit, block. Left, right, left, right. Each hit jarred her to the bone. They were both breathing heavily, their clothes damp with perspiration, clinging to their bodies. Amelia didn’t hear the encouraging shouts and cheers coming from outside the ring; she was completely absorbed with anticipating the next hit.

  Kellie went low, then high, trying to knock her off balance, but she remained steady on her feet. Years of dealing with persistent crooks gave her an advantage. She could outlast and outwait her, knowing sooner or later she would make a mistake or get sloppy and that would be Amelia’s time to strike.

  She had to admit, Kellie was good; she hadn’t been lying when she said she’d been practicing. Her moves were professional, quick, simple and effective. The force behind each blow was staggering and Amelia could feel her body burning, this being one of the best workouts she’d had in a while. The anger simmering just below the surface came alight, fuelling her body when she should’ve been exhausted.

  She blocked another of Kellie’s blows, moving to the side simultaneously as she pushed her arm wide, landing an unguarded gloved fist into her stomach. Her body instantly bowed down as she tried to protect itself, and Amelia took the opportunity to go at her again as she immediately righted herself. She landed an indirect blow as Kellie moved at the last second, the punch hitting her in the arm rather than the chest, spinning her around.

  Amelia took the advantage and jumped on her back, hooking her arm around Kellie’s neck and adding pressure. She didn’t have time to adjust to the new position as Kellie recovered, flipping Amelia easily over her shoulder and onto the mat beneath their feet.

  “You hit like a girl, Donovan,” she taunted as she drew closer. She heard the gasps coming from the crowd. No one dared tell Amelia Donovan she was a girl at anything. “You’re being soft on me. Stop protecting me Mia. I can take whatever you’ve got.”

  “Are you kidding, Kel? You’re barely standing.”

  Kellie jabbed at her forcefully then ducked, barely missing her return fist. She went down into a squat then pushed up from her feet, her head ramming into Amelia’s unprotected stomach, knocking her off
her feet and onto her back. Kellie’s head jerked left and right as she dodged the fists flying at her head, struggling to pin Amelia’s arms. She straddled her using her knees to push her arms down into the mat.

  “Okay, who has Jello?” a male voice added to the chortle of excited viewers.

  Amelia turned her head slightly and saw that everyone in the gym had stopped to watch. It could’ve been the fight of the year, the way they were treating it.

  “Hey, keep that shit up and we’ll go a round after. Have some respect, O’Malley,” Nick told the over-enthusiastic officer. From the look O’Malley gave him, he understood completely that Nick wasn’t joking.

  “Is that all you’ve got? You’re going to let me win?” Kellie asked as she pushed at her, shoving her into the mat. “Where’s all that anger and fury now?”

  “You’re pushing me.”

  “I always had to. I know you may never forgive me. Hell I’m not even sure I forgive myself. But know I’ve never blamed you. Never wished it was you. Walking away was the hardest decision of my life.”

  Amelia jerked away from Kellie, her emotions raw. She knew Kellie was painting herself as a target and taking on her anger, urging her to put the past behind her.

  Could she? Her closest friend turned her back on her, during a time she’d needed her the most. She’d been sixteen and her best friend had been hurt. She’d had no idea how to help her through it.

  “You did nothing wrong. It was too much. I was in a dark place. The darkest,” Kellie explained, her eyes imploring her to listen, to understand. “I wanted to reach out but I was afraid you’d tip me over the edge. I almost ended it, downed my mother’s pills and booze. I didn’t want to drag you into that. I called Ed and he got me the help I needed. I asked him not to tell you because I didn’t want you to think less of me.”

  Ed had been the detective on her case. A man she respected. Her mentor. It hurt to know he'd kept Kellie’s secret from her. Guilt consumed her. She had been there the entire time, through each of the police interviews, had watched as Kellie became more withdrawn. By the end, she’d become a shadow of her former self. Her friend had been so desolate to the point of taking her own life and she’d not known. Not one inkling. Of all the reasons she’d thought over the years for Kellie’s sudden departure, she’d never once considered it had been her actions that drove her away.

  Kellie certainly knew where to slide the blade for maximum damage. Amelia wanted to dissociate from the memories and emotions her words brought, not wanting to feel but she couldn’t, powerless to stop them from having an effect on her, sharp and painful. The fight went out of her.

  Amelia raised her hips, bringing her body off the floor and twisted like a pretzel, unhorsing Kellie from her perch. She tumbled to the side, losing her grip on Amelia’s arms. They each sat up, breathing heavily.

  A collective groan came from outside the ring as money exchanged hands once more. Slowly the crowd dissipated as it became apparent the show was over. They made no attempt to move, and Amelia wasn’t entirely sure if she could. Her muscles felt like wet spaghetti.

  “So, you ladies work out your differences?” Nick asked good-naturedly as he joined them in the ring.

  Amelia glared at him. “Don’t you dare say a word,” she warned.

  Nick sent a smile her way, unfazed at the warning. He reached down and lifted Kellie to her feet before giving her some instructions on how to improve her technique.

  Amelia stood, slightly incensed. “Hey, you work with me, remember? You may want to rethink where your loyalty is.”

  “What?” Nick asked innocently. “I was just trying to help…unless of course you’d like me to instruct you?”

  “Quit while you’re ahead, Nick,” Kellie told him.

  “While you still have a head,” Amelia muttered.

  “I’ll leave you to it, then. Quite a show, ladies. I fear for any man who dares cross you.”

  He left them, moving over to the weights he’d probably been using before Amelia and Kellie had starred centre stage. Kellie waited until he was out of earshot before she spoke. “So, are we good?”

  Amelia took off her gloves and placed them on the bench nearby.

  “Yeah, we’re good.”

  “There’s something to be said about Donovan Style. No bullshit, just anger and fists…works every time.”

  ***

  Fifteen minutes later, Amelia startled when Kellie placed two glasses and a bottle of Scotch down hard on her desk. She had been so engrossed in the lives of the two dead men, she’d not heard her approach.

  Kellie wheeled over a chair from Dean’s empty desk. The Pig Pen had been deserted as was most of the floor, their fellow officers either out on call or catching up on missed sleep. She sat down and poured two fingers of Scotch into each glass.

  Outside, darkness had fallen over the city, casting shadows throughout the streets, offering places for the thieves to hide, ready to pounce on the first unsuspecting person.

  There had once been a time when Harbour Bay had been a thoughtful and caring community striving to better itself. Now, only the tourists believed that. The city had become overrun like all large cities had been by the disrespectful and cruel, preying on the weak, and it took the police everything they had and more to crack down on crime.

  She and Kellie had both showered and changed back into their work clothes. The desire to fight had dissipated, leaving only exhaustion and a need to mend their friendship. They had been through too much together to let it all go.

  She hadn't thought her protective hovering had made matters worse. Guilt twisted in her gut. All these years she'd been angry with Kellie for walking away but she'd practically been pushing her.

  Why the hell had she not said anything?

  “I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of, but I can’t change any of that,” Amelia said. “I can only move forward and hope the crap doesn’t follow me. I never thanked you for getting me out of there. I know I owe you for everything, and one day I’ll find a way to make it up to you.”

  Amelia raised her glass, making her declaration a toast as well as a promise.

  Kellie shook her head, her blonde strands falling over her shoulder.

  “You owe me nothing. What you did, you did on your own. You never thought yourself good enough for anything…but I knew better. I knew the real you, and you’re worth more than anything in this world. Don’t forget that. You’re here because you wanted to be here, not because of what I did.”

  Amelia shifted uncomfortably. She’d never been good at accepting or examining her feelings, especially not feelings that continued to grow, whether it became a friendship or a sexual relationship. But she knew Kellie was right. She had been put down so much in her younger years, told how worthless she was so many times she’d begun to believe it. Kellie made her realise long ago that she had so much to offer, that she wasn’t as useless as she’d thought.

  If it hadn’t of been for Kellie’s attack, she’d never have found her true calling. She couldn’t imagine being anything other than a cop.

  Amelia bit down on her bottom lip. She never wanted to admit just how much she wanted and needed Kellie in her life. She’d changed, hardened over the years since Kellie's abrupt departure. She'd never wanted to allow anyone else power to hurt her like the person she'd trusted the most. She thought she could live without her, that she could just close the door on that part of her life, but the two women were connected, closer than she’d ever thought. She could forgive Kellie, knowing now all that her friend had battled, though she wished Kellie had confided in her.

  “I love you, Kel. I didn't want to after…but I do and you know I don’t say that to anyone easily. I’m not the touchy feeling type of person, but I missed you, missed what we were…and if you ever mention this night to anyone, I will kill you.”

  “Your secret is safe with me. I’ll never betray the fact that deep down under all that thick skin, you’re just a girl with a compassionate he
art.”

  Amelia frowned. “Don’t push it or I’ll wipe the floor with you again.”

  “Not tonight, I’m too tired. Maybe we can go back to the old times?”

  Amelia laughed. “God, I hope not. I don’t think the LAC could handle it.”

  They broke off as Darryl sauntered up to them carrying a pizza.

  “I see no furniture broken, so I assume you’ve decided to play nice?” he asked. She glared at him before noticing Kellie doing the same. He put his hands up in surrender. “Not going to say another word.”

  Wise decision.

  “Hey, Hill, where have you been?” A rookie named Cade Watson shuffled past. “You missed the sweetest fight. These two were all teeth and claws, best fight I’ve ever seen…” He hurried off when she and Kellie turned to him. The poor ginger haired newbie had not yet learned the fine art of dealing with women. Especially armed women.

  Wide-eyed, Darryl glanced back at them and Amelia tried for an innocent expression. She knew she failed when his eyebrow rose.

  “So a fight, huh? Is a hospital visit required?” he asked, his gaze drifting slowly over Kellie. So, that’s how it was. She shouldn’t be surprised; the woman was gorgeous inside and out.

  “You might need one if you don’t let it drop. We’ve worked it out,” she said bluntly.

  Darryl grunted as if disbelieving, then settled back into his chair. “Already forgotten.”

  “So, what are you doing? Maybe I can help,” Kellie said, putting them back on track. “I’m part of this case too, and I want to see it closed. I may not be a detective but I have two eyes and a brain.”

  Amelia studied her for a moment. “These are the records for our two dead guys,” she said, tapping a couple of manila folders.

  Kellie opened the first file. “Geez…large enough? Reminds me of your file,” she said to Amelia wryly. “Wow, was there anything these boys weren’t into? Quite the alphabet of offending charges.”

  “You ever heard of a man named Dick Coleani?” Darryl asked Kellie.

  Her head jerked up. “Sleazy Coleani?” She turned to Amelia. “Yeah, he used to run our neighbourhood as kids. What about him?”