For The Love Of The Doctor (BWWM Romance)

by Tasha Jones

  Security made a move to grab the woman but Jeremy shook his head, the last thing he wanted to do was humiliate the poor woman by having her escorted out. Heedless of the guards hovering nearby, the woman marched up to him and jabbed him furiously in the chest, “You're a killer!” she screamed. “You’re no doctor, you’re a killer and you’ll pay for this, mark my words but you’ll pay for this. I’m going to sue you for this!”

  Ignoring Jeremy’s wishes, the guards made a move towards her, at once she whirled around and snapped at them, “Don’t you dare touch me with your filthy hands, I’m leaving.”

  Spitting at Jeremy’s feet, she marched out with security in hot pursuit to ensure she didn’t inflict any more damage on her way out. Anna rushed over to Jeremy to see if he was alright but he walked past her unseeing and went into his office consumed with guilt. How could he have made such a mistake? How could he have been so careless as to prescribe a medicine which he should have known was life threatening to his patient? And the worst part was he couldn’t even remember prescribing that particular medicine and dosage for the patient. He combed his fingers through his hair, trying to remember what he had done and why.

  Was he losing it? Jeremy had always prided himself on being a meticulous doctor, he had yet to lose a patient and although he knew it was inevitable and the day would come when he would lose one, he couldn’t believe it was over such a careless mistake! Mrs. Karim was right, he was no better than a killer.

  The persistent buzz of his vibrating cell phone broke through his clouded mind and for the first time since they had met, Jeremy felt no joy at seeing Violet’s name flashing on the caller ID. He picked up because he couldn’t willfully ignore her phone calls, but the call was brief, hearing her voice failed to cheer him up and when he hung up, he did it with a heavy heart. All his life he had sacrificed things to achieve his goals and be good at his job and now he would have to sacrifice love but he didn’t know how he would be able to.

  CHAPTER TWELVE:

  Two entire days went by with no word from Jeremy when Violet started to feel worried.

  It was so unlike him to not even message. She called his cell phone but it went straight to voicemail. An hour later, she called his office directly and Lynn picked up the phone. But when she asked for Jeremy, she was told he was with patients and couldn’t talk right now but could she take a message?

  Before long it was late in the evening and Jeremy still hadn’t called her back. By now Violet was starting to feel annoyed and just a little angry. She went over their last few conversations and their date from a few nights ago trying to figure out if she had done something wrong or upsetting.

  By the time the third day rolled around, Violet could no longer ignore the gnawing certainty that Jeremy was deliberately avoiding her for some reason. He had gone from checking in with her throughout the day and sending messages and emails to absolute silence. No matter how busy he was, she knew he would have at least sent her a brief message or shot off a quick email. If it hadn’t been for her conversation with his receptionist, Violet would have been extremely worried about him. What she couldn’t figure out was why he had dropped out of her life like this.

  His attraction for her must have been all about the chase and since the goal had been accomplished, the challenge was gone. It was the only thing that made any sense, she thought bitterly. Typical man. Or he must have finally realized the differences in their classes.

  The anger and bitterness were self-directed, she berated herself for being so foolish and for getting carried away with her emotions. She had allowed herself to fall in love with a man who she could never really be with.

  It was a different kind of love than the one she had experienced with Alex. With Jeremy it was different. She was a woman who knew her mind, a strong woman who relied on no one else but herself. The same could be said for him as well. Two adults thrown together, drawn to each other, emotionally and sexually filling a void they didn’t think could ever be filled. He made her happy, he made her laugh. He had made her believe in dreams again. Could it truly all have been just a lie? Designed to get into her pants? But that made no sense to her, she thought of his handsome face and his hard, sculpted body, he wasn’t a man who needed to use tricks to get women to sleep with him.

  As images of his muscular body filled her head, her mind wandered to the last time they had been together. The sexual chemistry and uncontrollable passion were undeniable. She felt sexually awakened in his presence, feeling things she had only read about in books and magazines. Never dreaming it could really be that way with someone in real life.

  And now he was gone from her life, as swiftly as he had come into it. Leaving her lonely and bereft. Never again, she vowed to herself. Never again will I allow my heart to be so unguarded. On the fourth day, he showed up at her house looking apologetic and tired. Relief filled her, he wasn’t going to break up with her after all. But she confronted him about his silence right away, “You were avoiding me, why?”

  “I needed time to think.”

  “About?”

  “I can’t do this, Violet.”

  A cold dreadful feeling washed through her body and wrapped itself around her heart. “What do you mean?”

  “There’s a reason why I’ve been single for so long. At first I was so focused on school I didn’t have time for a relationship and then after Julia…” his voice trailed off.

  Violet felt a violent stab of anger towards the faceless Julia who had cheated on her beloved Jeremy and broken his heart. “After Julia, I threw myself into my work and I loved it. I loved every single moment of it and I knew I was good at it.”

  “You’re an amazing doctor, Jeremy, you cured Tanya,” she said softly.

  He smiled briefly, “I can’t be in this relationship anymore.”

  “I don’t understand what you’re trying to say.”

  “I’m saying we can’t be together anymore, I have to break up with you.”

  “But why?”

  “It’s complicated.”

  “But Jeremy, you’re not making any sense! Do you not love me anymore? Did you just never love me to begin with?”

  “No! I do love you, but I just can’t be with you.”

  Not telling her the real reason for their breakup was one of the hardest things he ever had to do. Seeing the trust fade away from her pain-stricken eyes hurt more than he could have imagined. But he couldn’t and wouldn’t be so selfish as to place such a heavy burden on her shoulders. He knew that his generous, big hearted Violet would feel Mr. Karim’s death keenly and she would take the blame for it and he wanted to protect her from it. He didn’t want her to feel doubt for even a second. Not when she had already suffered so much, he wanted Violet to laugh and dance through life, he didn’t want her to be unhappy. How could he tell her a patient’s wife was blaming him for her husband’s death and that she was going to sue him? He couldn’t bring Violet or Tanya into the mess that would soon become his life.

  The more she insisted on knowing the truth, the more he hardened his heart, refusing to budge on his decision. Their argument kept going around in circles, both of them dreading the moment when they would say goodbye, maybe forever.

  “But there has to be more to this, Jeremy,” Violet repeated again, her voice was dry and filled with sadness, “Is there someone else?”

  “No!” he exclaimed, unable to imagine a world in which he would leave her for someone else, “No, Vy, there’s nobody else. If I could, I would be with you but I just can’t. It’s not you, it’s me.” He finished lamely, not knowing how else to explain it because it was after all his problem, his issue, it had nothing to do with her.

  A long stretch of silence followed his sentence and he felt her physically drawing away from him, he sensed her gathering her strength and pulling herself together. A few more minutes passed and then she finally looked up at him, her large eyes filled with despair and resignation. Her voice trembled and shook with both tears and rage, “I think it
would be better if you left, Jeremy, you’ve made yourself perfectly clear. I have to go get Tanya from school now.”

  Mutely he nodded, biting back the offer to get her himself. He longed to gather Violet in his arms and comfort her, she looked so lost and sad. Sitting in the large, threadbare armchair, she looked small and vulnerable. He almost took a step back towards her but then he remembered Mrs. Karim’s angry face and he knew he couldn’t. Without saying another word he left.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN:

  While sweeping under the living room couch, Violet came across a set of keys. It was Jeremy’s. The sight of them nearly brought tears to her eyes because in a flash she was remembering the night he had dropped them. He had taken her out for dinner and they had come home in a frenzied rush unable to keep their hands off of each other. They barely made it through the door before tumbling on to the couch, limbs tangling, clothes flying off. She had heard the clink of his keys hitting the floor; they must have slid under the couch somehow.

  With a heavy sigh, she placed the keys on the dining table and decided she would stop by his office later that evening when Anna would be gone for the day. The last thing she wanted was to have a conversation with her or get sympathy looks.

  Tanya was busy watching Frozen for what seemed like the hundredth time while Debra was in the kitchen making them mac and cheese, when Violet went out to run her quick errand. Debra took one look at her and raised her eyebrows, “Quick errand huh. Girl, that better not mean what I think it means.”

  “I’m just going to drop off his keys! He left them here last time he was here.”

  “No hanky panky, no matter how much your vagina might be screaming for it.”

  “Deb! Tanya’s in the next room!”

  Debra waved the spoon she was using to mix the cheese in the air and shooed Violet out of the kitchen, “Yeah, yeah, now go and give him back his keys. Take as long as you need to, hun, I don’t have anywhere else to be.”

  “Thank you again for coming over on such short notice, you’re a lifesaver.”

  “Yeah yeah,” Debra muttered going back to the task at hand.

  It took Violet just over thirty minutes to get to the clinic downtown where Jeremy had his offices. Instead of going into the main clinic area, she went up directly to the third floor. The desk in the reception area was deserted, Anna had gone home for the day, Jeremy’s office was just down the hall and she could see the light was on in his office, clearly he was still in the office. Fighting back an overwhelming urge to go and see him, she resolutely started to head towards Anna’s desk with the intention of leaving a short note with the set of keys.

  But the soft murmur of voices drew her back towards his office. She tiptoed down the hall quietly, making sure she was well out of view. The glass wall had blinds on it, which made it difficult to see clearly but she saw two shadowy forms. The tall form she recognized as Jeremy, and the other silhouette looked like a woman. A patient probably but the sound of the girlish voice was too low and intimate for it to be a patient. Violet’s heart began to flutter uncomfortably as a cold feeling settled into the pit of her stomach; she wished she could get closer and hear what they were saying but to do so would mean revealing her presence. A breathy, sensual laugh escaped the office and Violet recognized it immediately, she now knew who was in the office with Jeremy this late in the evening. The stunning girl with the gorgeous face and killer body, Venetia.

  Violet knew she should leave, she should put the keys on Anna’s desk with the note and leave but her legs refused to function and she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the scene unfolding in front of her. In wrapped fascination, she watched as the female shadow stepped closer to Jeremy’s shadow, slim hands went up and entwining themselves around his neck pulling his head down into a kiss. Large breasts thrust up and pressed themselves against his body, the two shadows blended into one.

  Feeling sick to her stomach, Violet stepped away from the torturing sight, choking back a cry of despair. All of a sudden, Jeremy’s actions over the past week made perfect sense. His silence, the way he had just dropped out of her life with a bullshit excuse of needing to focus on his career and not make any more mistakes. What a load of bullcrap, she thought, when the real reason was Venetia. She knew why he had chosen her, Venetia was the kind of girl he should be with, they came from similar backgrounds and understood each other’s worlds, whereas she would never fit into it at all. But what hurt was the lie, why couldn’t he have told her the truth? That he was better matched with Venetia than with her? And why couldn’t he have figured it out sooner instead of breaking her heart once she was already in love with him? How could he have done this to Tanya?

  Unable to contain her disappointment and anger any more she whirled around and rushed towards the elevator, the pain of his betrayal was so great she felt like the walls were closing in on her and she couldn’t breathe. In her haste to escape, the keys slipped out of her hands. The clanking sound of metal hitting the marble floors echoed loudly through the area.

  “Arghh…” she choked off the rest of the word desperately hoping that somehow Jeremy and Venetia were so wrapped up in each other they hadn’t heard the key or her. Grabbing the key off the floor, she dashed towards Anna’s desk as quietly as she could. From down the hall, she heard the murmur of voices again, she heard Jeremy’s voice call out, “Anna?”

  Deciding she didn’t have time to leave a note, Violet jabbed the down arrow on the elevator hoping it wouldn’t take too long to appear. The elevator whirred to life and began its slow descent upwards, the seconds seemed to trickle by in excruciating slowness. She heard Jeremy’s footsteps in the hall and pressed the button again, knowing it wouldn’t really make a difference. And then to her great relief, the elevator grinded to a stop and the doors opened smoothly, she popped inside just as she heard Jeremy’s shocked voice, “Vy?!”

  As she turned to press the button on the panel, her scornful eyes connected with Jeremy’s before looking behind him to where Venetia stood with a smug smile on her face. She managed to hold on to the tears, which threatened to flow until she was safely back in her car once more. She started the engine and calmly drove herself home, concentrating all her attention on the road ahead, deliberately refusing to think of anything else.

  The phone calls from Jeremy started to arrive soon after. Violet looked down at the caller ID, feeling utter disgust. Resolutely she pressed the decline button each time it rang until she was finally forced to turn her phone off. Jeremy was the last person she wanted to hear from. No doubt he had a packet of lies ready to force down her throat.

  ***

  The light in the living room was on; Debra must have heard her because the door opened just as she was inserting the key into the lock.

  “Violet!” Debra greeted her with a slight concern, “Is everything okay? Did you drop it off?”

  “Yes, I did. Everything’s fine.” Violet replied vaguely, too tired to go into the story now. She entered her home relishing the comfortable, homey feeling of the small bungalow.

  “Okay well, Tanya’s in bed asleep already.”

  Motherly concern overshadowed her immediate pain and she hurried to Tanya’s room, “Already? She usually puts up a struggle going to bed so early on a Saturday night.”

  “Oh no no, she’s fine.” Debra hastened to assure her as Violet opened the door to Tanya’s room, “We spent a few hours at the park and I think that tired her out.”

  True to Debra’s words, Tanya was fast asleep, curled up in a tight little ball, the blankets tucked around her warmly. Violet kissed her petal-like cheek, unconsciously listening for something to be wrong but Tanya’s even breathing assured her everything was all right. Feeling immensely relieved, she gave Debra a warm smile. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be the crazy mother. I hope she didn’t fuss too much with her supper?”

  “No, she ate well, she’s fine Violet, don’t worry.” Debra smiled at her kindly and squeezed her hand in reassurance. “Sometimes kids get tir
ed doing kid-like things, you know. She’s a tough little girl and she’s recovering well.”

  “Thank you, Deb, want me to drop you off at home?”

  “You look pretty tuckered out yourself, Violet, so don’t worry about it. I’m going to walk home.”Sensing that Violet was about to protest, Debra held up a hand, “I insist, it’s a really nice night out and it will take me less than ten minutes, so why don’t you call it an early night. I’ll show myself out.”

  Feeling too emotionally spent to argue with the indomitable Debra, Violet agreed and hugged her friend goodbye, thinking for the hundredth time how grateful and lucky she was to have someone like Debra in her life. As she headed to her bedroom to change into a pair of shorts and a tank top, she heard the front door close and the lock click into place. Without bothering to wash her face or braid her hair, she crawled into bed after checking in on Tanya once more and resisted the urge to gather the warm bundle into her arms. Burying her head into her pillow, she allowed herself to release the flood of tears. Bitter, angry, lonely tears drenched her pillow before she fell into a dreamless sleep.