Love Disorder

by Yuriko Hime

  Eventually, I went home to Carter and his family. Uno wanted to take me there, but I refused her offer politely. She had better things to do than play as my babysitter. Didn't mean that I was reluctant as we bade farewell though. Our time together was fleeting, yet it left an impression on me. Uno was a good person. I could that tell that much about her.

  That night as I sat in one of Carter's large sofa's, my best friend drilled me like a good sergeant. "I can't believe you met her when I left," he said. Carter was not Uno's biggest fan, but he loved the idea of meeting a celebrity. "Was she beautiful in person? Was her hair that long? Did you have a good time?"

  "Slow down lover boy." I sketched a scarf on my pad, the one that mom gave me before. I was halfway in filling it with drawings and designs, some of them I've already managed to sell online. "Yes she was beautiful. The pictures doesn't do her justice." I decided a color for the scarf and wrote blue beside it. "Her hair came to her waist, and yes I had a good time, considering the circumstances of our meeting."

  Carter paused the game on his phone to tidy his curly hair. It was always untamable, like a wind blew on it even though he spent most of his time indoors. While girls would call him the boy next door type, guys our age would often tease him with words like twink or gay.

  If Carter was ever bothered by it, I didn't notice even once. He would usually shrug it off with a smile, though he tend to stick with lady friends instead of guy friends. Maybe he was really gay. Maybe he wasn't. I never asked. That was the kind of relationship we had since he moved a few blocks from my house years ago. But if one thing was true, he was kind of feminine. That was what you get when you grew up in a household with six older sisters.

  "Any gossip?" he asked, continuing the game on his phone. It was a race. I could see the sports car he was driving from the corner of my eye. I smirked when he crashed on the wall.

  "Nope, no gossip. She was normal for someone so famous." My hand moved automatically to shade a pattern on the scarf. His question did remind me of one thing. Right now I want you. Those exact words that Uno said earlier. The thought made me blush.

  "Did something happen?" I glanced at Carter. He caught me blushing, apparently.

  "No, get back to your game."

  Who would have thought that I'd see Uno three days after that? I got a call from Mr. Meyer, mom's attorney, telling me that I should meet him in his office at the other side of the city. He said that he'd be reading me the Will that she left to his care, and it was important that I was present in the event.

  Carter dropped me off to the building where the office was located. I was on zombie mode from the lobby to the elevator. This was it, the thing I've been dreading about. The attorney would tell me what the more permanent set-up would be. Where I would go. Who I'd be with. Stuff like that. I wasn't legal yet, so I knew that things would be complicated.

  Mr. Meyer answered the door to his office with a small smile. He was barely in his 50's from what I could tell, yet his thinning hair and protruding belly said otherwise. He reached a hand to me. "Hello Riri, come inside." I could tell you that Mr. Meyer liked hockey and recognition. He had hockey sticks on his wall, and a trophy to back it up on his desk. I didn't know what that had to do with his firm. Maybe he thought it would be a good subject for conversation.

  Like mom, he was also old school with his pictures. He had three picture frames on his desk, next to his computer. All of these occupied my eyes as I sat silently in front of his desk. "Who are we waiting for?" I said curiously. "A friend of mom's?"

  Mr. Meyer straightened his yellow tie. "Mrs. Chance instructed me in our last transaction that her talent, Uno, must be present when the will is read." He glanced at the wall clock behind him. "She'd be here any minute." Speaking of the devil. Uno was standing behind the door when it swung open. She was still wearing black. Her dress shirt from the day of the funeral was replaced with a cotton t-shirt, and her slacks with jeans.

  Mr. Meyer stood to greet her. "Welcome," he said, his voice wavering. Sometimes I forgot that not everyone was used to the idea of meeting celebrities. He indicated to the chair in front of mine. "Please take a seat and make yourself comfortable." I nodded to Uno absentmindedly. Right now I wasn't thinking of small talks, but more of the future I'd face in the next months.

  The attorney hurried behind his desk. "Well then," he said. Opening a drawer beside him, he retrieved a brown envelop. It was labeled Estella Chance, after mom's name. A twinge of sorrow settled on me. Would I ever get over this hurt of losing her? Maybe someday, but definitely not now. All I could hope for was to be as stable as I could, both in emotions and circumstances.

  Mr. Meyer opened the folder. He quickly wore his eyeglasses before he read its contents. "Now that everyone needed is present. Let us begin." I stole a glance at Uno. She was too focused on the attorney to notice that I was looking. "As per the client's message, and I quote," Mr. Meyer said loudly and clearly, grabbing my attention. "I, Estella Chance, is writing this will voluntarily and with sound mind." He leaned forward. "In the event of my death, my property in Maine Street, along with my two cars and all my possessions." A pause. "Will go to charity."

  "Wait, what?" I squeaked. "What about me? I'm her daughter."

  The attorney understood what I was trying to communicate with my panicked eyes. He squinted at the paper. "Ahh. . . There's more." I calmed myself long enough to hear what he had to say. "To you Uno, my talent and beloved friend, I have left my—" Blah blah blah. I tuned out. He said more things after that but my ears only registered the next words. "If my death happens sooner than expected, I will entrust the care of my only child, Riri, to you as her guardian. Should you accept this responsibility, the attorney will handle the rest of the paper works."

  If I wasn't drowning before, it was definitely happening now. He glanced at Uno. "Do you accept? From what I understand, you're twenty-one and legal enough to be Riri's guardian."

  "And what if I refuse?" she asked. Yes Mr. Meyer, please answer that question. I was dying to know. Literally. My lungs were burning.

  He removed his eyeglasses and placed it on the table. "Well, I've discussed this with Estella before. She doesn't have any relatives in the States. Her other family members are scattered in the world. Because Riri is a minor, she'd have to go to a foster home if you don't agree to be her guardian."

  "My eighteenth birthday is just a few months from now," I reasoned. "Can't you let this slide? I can care for myself or stay with my friend's family until I'm legal."

  "I'm required by the law to continue this process the right way Riri. If you stay with your friend's family, they have to support you financially. Meaning they have to be capable to do that." I thought about Carter. He wasn't poor, but his family members were more than enough to pile up the bills. Plus I didn't want to be a burden to him. Sensing that I wouldn't argue, Mr. Meyer said, "Uno is your only chance."

  My heart sank. I hated the thought of leaving my fate to another person, albeit knowing her. But I hated the thought of going to the foster home more. There was no shame in it, yet somehow my mind rejected the possibility. Uno turned to Mr. Meyer thoughtfully. "Can you leave the room for a while?" she said. "I'd like to talk to the girl alone."

  "Sure, but I'll be right back," he promised. "I hope you have your answer by then."

  When he was gone, Uno didn't speak to me immediately. She was fixated on the trophy on the attorney's desk. I stared at my shoes. I wasn't the type to worry, but this was my future we were talking about. Things would change yes, but this drastic? I didn't think mom could give away all our possessions. Was that even legal?

  "I don't like the idea of having you in my house," she said, breaking the silence. "I don't know you, and I don't like total strangers touching my things."

  I glanced at her in surprise. "I wouldn't call us strangers when you were kind enough to invite me for dinner."

  She stared blankly at me. "I have no idea what you're talking about. This is the first time I saw you." Hu
h?

  "No it wasn't," I insisted. "We went to a restaurant about three days ago and talked to each other." I frowned. "Is this your idea of a joke? It was fine at that time, but this is no laughing matter. My future is at stake."

  Uno took her time mulling over her decision. I remained silent to give her space. Inside, I was praying that she would agree to the set-up. It was just for a couple of months, and then I'd get a job so I could move out and support myself. Though I've known her for a little while, I knew that she was kind. I was banking on the kindness today.

  "Alright, I'll agree to be your guardian," she finally said. A surge of gratitude ran through me. She wouldn't regret this. I would be the best occupant there was. She wouldn't hear a peep from me. "To get it out of the way, I'm informing you that your stay wouldn't be free," she said.

  "I know that. I'll get a job as soon as I can. Maybe I'll sell more designs to people." I thought about the scarves I sketched. I'd move on to bigger projects like dresses and t-shirts. It would be a good source of income, and experience for the course I wanted to take. "You don't have to worry about me," I promised. "I'll take care of myself."

  She crossed her legs. Uno didn't appear to have heard a word I said. "Who said anything about designs?" she asked. "I'll own you from now on, so everything you do will be subject to my decisions."

  "Excuse me?" The joke department was getting out of line.

  "You heard me," she said arrogantly. "Being your guardian means your life is basically mine. Your work will depend on my instructions too. And when I tell you to shut up, you will close your mouth like a good little girl and do as I say." She leaned back on her chair. "I do owe Mrs. Chance a lot, but those are my rules. Either you live with it or not. Your choice."

  The person in front of me seemed like a changed woman. She was nothing like the Uno I've spoken to before. Was she perhaps toying with me again? Regardless of her behavior, I had to think of my future. If I were to say no to her offer, I'd end up in the foster home. I had to make my choice fast. "Okay," I said resignedly. "Let's go with that."

  "I knew you were smart under that long hair, Strawberries."

  "Strawberries?"

  She pointed to my head. "You remind me of one with that hair color. I've hated it then. I still despise it now. We're calling you that."

  My mind was all over the place. Did she wake up on the wrong side of the bed? "What happened to you?" I asked.

  She intertwined her fingers. "You don't want to know."

  Chapter 3. New Home

  Uno and Mr. Meyer agreed to meet at a later date to settle the paper works. I could barely listen to their conversation. My thoughts were elsewhere, particularly to my mom. I always knew I was adopted. Though I've forgotten my life in the adoption home, I've accepted that my biological parents didn't want me. That was why I was grateful to mom for giving me a good life.

  I thought I knew her. I thought she was a person I could trust. Why then did she have to give away everything we owned to charity, leaving me with nothing but the clothes on my back? It wasn't fair. She gave me everything, only to take it away with her death. I took a deep, shaky breath as Uno and I went out of the attorney's office.

  "By the way, Strawberries." There was that name again. She halted. "Here."

  I hurried to my feet to catch the sunglasses she tossed. "What's this for?"

  She faced forward. "To trim your nails with." I ignored her sarcasm. Uno has changed since we last met at the cemetery, and it didn't stop with her attitude. It was noticeable in the way she moved too. If she used to stroll before, she walked briskly now without waiting for me. I had to hasten my steps to keep up with her.

  "We just passed the elevators," I said, nudging my chin to the right though I knew she wasn't looking. "Are we taking the stairs?"

  She didn't speak until we were in front of the fire exit. She yanked the door open and motioned to the circular metal stairs. "Go ahead." I gulped when I looked down at the narrow steps. We were in the fifteenth floor of the building. A long way from the ground. "Don't make me repeat myself," she said in a warning tone. "Remember our agreement."

  Making sure not to look at the ground, I took one uncertain step after another downwards. My knuckles were white as a sheet as I held tightly to the railings. The engineers or whoever put it here shouldn't have made the fire exit stairs too narrow. And why pray tell were we going this way? I stopped abruptly. "The staircase is missing a few steps. We can't continue."

  "I'll take care of that," Uno said. She pushed me hard. I swallowed my heart as I fell. My screams were cut short as I landed on the open dumpster below. My heart was still racing uncontrollably when Uno jumped after me. She landed with grace, like she was on the set of an action film. "Well that was disappointing," she muttered under her breath.

  I removed a banana peel from my head and threw it to her. "I could have died! What's wrong with you?!"

  Uno hoisted herself from the dumpster, unaffected by my heavy breathing and glaring. "Sue me," she said. She didn't even help me up. What happened to the Uno who took care of me days ago? Was that all an act? After wiping away the sticky thing on my arm, I followed her grudgingly out of the stinky dumpster.

  When were into the back alley of the building, she pointed to fifty feet from us where a beat-up black van was sitting idly. "Whose van is that?" I asked suspiciously, staring at the chipping paint and aging tire.

  "Mine. Now hurry up Strawberries, we don't want them to catch us. They knew I'd be coming here. They always do." We jogged to the van's direction.

  "Where's the black Hummer? We used that the other day didn't we?"

  "Stop this nonsense," she snapped. "I've never seen you in my life before this, except for a picture that Manager owned." My head threatened to explode. She was keen on denying what I knew to be true. What should I think of this? We were a stone's throw away from the van when they showed up, folks with cameras and digital recorders, shouting Uno's name. So that was what she was talking about when she said the word them. They were on either side of the back alley, a group comprising of ten people or more. I wasn't in the position to count.

  We soon reached the van. Uno took a Mickey Mouse keychain from her pocket and started trying the keys one by one. Though she was cool and collected, there was a rising panic in my chest that I've never felt before. "Suppose these people reach us?" I said. "They'll just take your picture and go right?"

  "If that's what you think of the paparazzi, then you're living in a made up world." She fumbled for the keys. How many keys were there? She was taking too long. The urgency of the situation rubbed off on me. Though I didn't know what was too happen, I felt that it wouldn't be good. We had to get out of there. A click sounded, followed by a triumphant "aha" from her. "Get in and open the driver side for me," she instructed.

  She was barely able to start the engine when they reached us. They slammed their hands on the windows, as if it would grant them access to the van. Uno pressed her foot on the gas and sped out of there before it was too late. We survived. Mortality, zero. Traumatized, one- me. I never thought I'd have to escape from the paparazzi in my life.

  When we were cruising on the main road, I felt safe enough to speak. "Good thing that didn't happen back in the cemetery. That would be too much too soon." The car screeched to a halt. "Why did you stop?" I asked quizzically.

  "Engine problem if the police asks." She shifted to face me. Uno was gripping the wheel tightly but was trying to hide her irritation under a mask of straight face. "Listen, I've said it before and I'll say it for the last time. I have never met you before this. Never. You're starting to get on my nerves."

  I pursed my lips. She was getting on mine too. I was close to slapping some sense to her. At the last second, I remembered that the paper works for guardianship wasn't ironed out, and I could still end up in the foster home if she got pissed. I nodded numbly and stared out the window. God, why was this happening to me? She restarted the car.

  Minutes into the ride, m
y best friend popped in my head. He must be wondering what happened to me. I glanced reluctantly at Uno. Her back was straight, her shoulders stiff. She could still be irritated. Never mind. I'd ask her what the general setup would be when she wasn't on her period or something. I'd go with what she wanted for now.

  We traveled on the main road for a while. I didn't check the time though I had a nice wristwatch on. Mom gave it to me. She was particular about those things. Riri, never keep anyone waiting, she'd say. If you want to succeed on your goals, you have to be mindful of every little detail. I sighed. All those guidelines and in the end, I didn't understand her after all. What was she thinking?

  We entered an unfamiliar path. From the lively and bustling city, we've managed to reach a nice, quiet suburban area. That was the only way to describe it. Most of the houses were huge and gated. Private properties owned by the rich. I was tempted to ask Uno where we were going, but I kept mum while she drove. It wasn't worth the trouble, and besides, she'd tell me sooner or later.

  The van stopped in front of a huge, intimidating gate made of iron and wood. There were tall shrubs on either side to keep intruders out. Uno rolled her window down and poked her head out. A beep sounded from somewhere, followed by the groan of the gate as it opened. "Facial recognition system," she said to answer my unspoken question. "Nobody goes in or out without my permission." She moved the van forward, into the vast property.

  "What if someone sneaks in? A curious fan."

  "He'll die," she answered in a clipped tone. "And nobody knows the location of my house."