Edge of Love

by E. L. Todd

  Her eyes widened. “What did you say to me?”

  I looked at her. “I said I could slap you right now! I’ve done everything for you, Scarlet, and you won’t even compromise with me. Not even a little bit. This is important to me but you couldn’t care less. I’m done talking about this.” I turned around and walked toward the door. I opened it and was about to step through.

  “You walk out that door and we’re done.”

  I stopped immediately. I didn’t turn around, and I continued to stare into the hallway. I heard the sincerity in her voice and I knew she wasn’t bluffing. Despite the overwhelming anger coursing through my limbs, I stepped back into the apartment and slammed the door closed. I stared at her for a moment and gave her a look of loathing before I stormed down the hallway. I grabbed a blanket and pillow then marched back into the living room.

  I pushed my face next to hers. “You should be sleeping on the couch, not me.”

  She met my angry look with her look of ferocity.

  “Now get out of my space and go to bed.” I turned away and stripped off my clothes, getting under the sheets. I stared up at the ceiling and avoided her look. “I said get out.” My voice was quiet but the venom in it even frightened me. After a moment, Scarlet walked away into our bedroom and slammed the door behind her.

  I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight. I was too angry to stop my accelerated breathing. Scarlet was so smart and had such a knack for social understanding, but her psychotic behavior was unbelievable. I understood her point of view, but she was still being selfish. I didn’t know if I would be able to talk any sense into her. I refused to get married without my parents being there. If I told her Ryan wasn’t invited, she would leave me in a heartbeat. If I couldn’t talk some sense into her, perhaps her brother would have a better chance. I never understood their relationship. He was so cold and direct with her, but she always took it like a soldier. When I raised my voice and spoke my mind, she broke down into tears. It didn’t make any sense.

  I’ve known Scarlet for ten years, and I don’t just know her as an acquaintance. This is a woman that I’ve spent almost every day with. I understood her better than anyone. She would argue that Ryan understood her better, but that was complete bullshit. I got her like no one else. And I knew there was more to this story. Even though we were under stressful circumstances, I still couldn’t believe Scarlet was acting this way. I hope tomorrow will be different. A good night’s sleep might cool her veins and return her to normal. It better.

  11

  Scarlet

  I packed my bag before I left the bedroom the next morning. I was so angry with Sean that I didn’t want to be around him anymore. How could he possibly expect me to get married at his family estate? Rumors would be circulating about our plane adventure and everyone would whisper behind my back. They would know I had no parents, I didn’t come from money, and I was the reason Sean moved away. And I would have to smile and pretend that I was fine with everything even though I was far from it. This was my day and I wanted it to happen my way. I didn’t even have a father to give me away, or a mother to fix my veil. I would just be embarrassed. Sean didn’t care at all.

  When I walked into the living room with the bag over my shoulder, Sean was already awake. He was sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee on the table. I was surprised he was awake this early. I knew he had work, but not for another hour.

  His eyes widened when he looked at me. “Are you being serious right now?” He rose to a stand and glared at me. “So when I want to leave you threaten to break up with me, but you can just leave whenever you want? That’s bullshit.”

  I glared at him. “Fuck you.”

  He stepped toward me. “Fuck you, Scar. Where are you going? To Ryan’s, right?”

  I stared at him.

  “Why don’t you marry him then? He seems to solve all your problems.”

  “Shut up.”

  “No.”

  I saw his chest rise and fall with his heavy breathing. I knew how angry he was. “Are you leaving me?”

  I stared at him. “Yes.”

  His breathing increased as he listened to my words. The pain in his eyes was tantamount.

  “For now,” I added.

  He looked at me. “Are you ending this relationship?”

  “No.”

  He breathed a sigh of relief but he still looked angry. “Take all the time you need. I’ll be here when you’re ready to apologize.”

  “Excuse me?” Now I was pissed again. “You’re the selfish asshole that doesn’t care about my feelings at all.”

  “Me?” he asked. “You’re the one who’s being a bitch, Scarlet. There’s absolutely no justification to your actions. You knew that’s where I would get married someday. You knew that years ago. It can’t change. This is what I want.”

  I shook my head. “What about what I want?”

  “Fine,” he said. “My parents and family won’t be there. That’s what you want?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then Ryan can’t be there.”

  “What?”

  “You heard me. That’s fair.”

  “It’s not the same thing at all.”

  “I think it is.”

  “Fuck you, Sean.”

  “Whatever, Scar.” He turned around walked back to the sofa. “Have a safe trip. I might be here when you get back.”

  “Are you threatening me?”

  He didn’t say anything.

  I opened the door and was about to walk through when his voice startled me.

  “Scarlet.”

  I stopped and turned around.

  He stared at the blank television screen. He didn’t look at me once. “I love you.”

  I took a deep breath. The last thing I wanted to do was be sentimental. I was too angry to feel any other emotion but rage. I pressed my lips together then opened them. “I love you too.”

  He nodded. “Bye.”

  I didn’t speak. I slammed the door behind me and walked away.

  I left the building and took a cab to Ryan’s house. Ryan wasn’t home because he was at work, but I knew Janice would be there. I knocked before I inserted my spare key in the door and walked inside.

  Janice was sitting at the kitchen table with her computer sitting in front of her. Her smile dropped when she saw the bags over my shoulder. “This can’t be good.”

  “I’m going to stay with you guys for a while.”

  “I assumed.”

  I placed my bags in the spare bedroom then returned to the kitchen. I placed my laptop on the table then poured myself a cup of coffee.

  “So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  She rose from her seat. “I’ll let Ryan know you’re here.”

  “Isn’t he at work?”

  She raised an eyebrow. “It’s barely seven in the morning.”

  I nodded. “Oh yeah.”

  “I’ll be back. He usually walks around naked so I don’t want a scarring accident to happen.”

  “Yes, please tell him I’m here,” I said quickly. I was thankful that Janice thought about that.

  When she returned, Ryan was following behind her. He was wearing his basketball shorts and a ripped shirt. His hair was unleveled and bent at odd angles. It was obvious he just woke up. “What happened now?”

  I drank my coffee. “Nothing.”

  He sighed. “How long are you staying?”

  “As long as I want.”

  “I know you’re mad at Sean but don’t be a brat to me, the man who is putting a roof over your head.”

  “I make more money than you do.”

  “Not right now.”

  I sighed. “I don’t know. A few weeks.”

  Janice’s eyes widened. “Weeks? You really shouldn’t be away from your fiancé that long. You may as well break up.”

  “Well, maybe we should.”

  Ryan stared at me. “Don’t talk like that.
”

  I glared at him.

  “You don’t mean it and you know it. Now tell me what happened.”

  “I don’t feel like talking about it.”

  “Now or ever?” he asked.

  “Never,” I said. “But especially right now.”

  Ryan nodded. “I expect a full report when I get home from work.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”

  He left the kitchen then returned to his bedroom, getting ready for work. Janice typed on her computer and avoided my gaze. I knew she was trying to give me my space. If I didn’t want to talk, I wouldn’t budge.

  “How’s your manuscript?” she asked.

  I sighed. “I haven’t worked on it in days. I’m falling behind.”

  “I can help.”

  “Nah. I’ll do it today.”

  “Okay.” She smiled at me then returned to her work.

  Ryan emerged from the hallway then approached Janice. He grabbed her face and kissed her hard, making her melt. Normally, I would be uncomfortable with this, but since I’ve heard them have sex dozens of times, this was nothing.

  ‘I love you, baby,” Ryan said.

  She smiled at him. “I love you.”

  He kissed her again. “I’ll see you when I get home.”

  “Hurry.”

  He smiled. “I’ll try.” He kissed her on the forehead then looked at me. His sweet voice evaporated. “Are you going to be okay?”

  I nodded. “I got my best friend. I’ll be fine.”

  “Okay.” He walked away then disappeared from the apartment. I turned back to my laptop and became absorbed in my work. Hours passed by and all I thought about was the novel I was reading. We had lunch while we worked, but neither one of us spoke. It was amazing how much time passed when I was working. When the front door opened again, Ryan and Cortland walked inside. I looked at the clock. It was already five.

  Ryan was dressed in jeans and a blue sweater, and Cortland was wearing black pants and a green shirt. I liked it when he wore green because it highlighted his eyes. Ryan came to the table and kissed Janice just like he did this morning.

  “What took you so long?” she asked.

  He smiled. “I came as quick as I could.”

  “It wasn’t quick enough.”

  He pulled away and looked at me. “Are you feeling better?”

  “I feel the same,” I answered.

  Cortland took the seat next to me. “Sean and you are still fighting? I felt the tension in the car last night.”

  “That’s an understatement. He threatened to slap me.”

  “What?” Ryan stared me down. His earlier buoyant attitude was replaced with rage almost immediately.

  “He wouldn’t actually do it, Ryan. He was just that angry.” I closed my computer and looked at him. “You can calm down now.”

  He sat down in the seat across from me and looked at me. “Are you ready to tell us what’s going on?”

  I sighed. “I didn’t realize I was going to have an audience.”

  Cortland shrugged. “Ryan would just tell me anyway.”

  I laughed. “Yes, that’s true. He can have a big mouth.”

  Ryan leaned back in his chair. “I didn’t tell Sean that you fucked Cortland a few times. The guy has the right to know but I’ve kept it to myself. I think I’m pretty trustworthy.”

  Cortland nodded. “He has a point.”

  I sighed. “Well, this is the abridged version. Sean wants to get married in Connecticut with a bunch of people I don’t even know. They are going to be gossiping about my plane incident, and I’m going to have to make small talk at my own wedding. And I don’t have a dad to walk me down the aisle or a mom to be there for me. It’s just embarrassing. I really don’t want to do it.”

  Ryan was quiet for a moment. “I’ll walk you down the aisle, Scarlet.”

  I smiled. “I know, but it’s just embarrassing that our mother is crazy. And our wedding announcement is going to be everywhere. Mom will probably hear about it and come to crash it since we took her money. I just don’t want to deal with all the bullshit. It pisses me off that Sean expects me to do this.”

  “What did he say?” Ryan asked.

  “That it’s important to him and his family.”

  Ryan nodded. “I can understand that. Then what do you want, Scar?”

  “I just want to get married here with the six of us.”

  Cortland leaned back. “What about Sean’s parents?”

  “I don’t want them there, but I would let them come if Sean wanted them to.”

  Ryan looked at me. “What about his friends and other family members?”

  “No,” I said. “I don’t want them there. I want it just to be us. It’s a celebration of me and Sean. I don’t want to deal with anything else.”

  Ryan sighed. “Scar, I’m sorry but you’re the wrong one.”

  “What?” I asked incredulously. “After the horrible weekend we had, I can’t believe he would expect this of me.”

  “Did you tell him why?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “And you told him how you feel about mom?”

  “Well, no. But I shouldn’t have to. I have a plethora of reasons.”

  Ryan shook his head. “If the situation was reversed, you would leave him, Scar. I’m surprised he’s putting up with you right now. His family is rich and famous. He can’t just get hitched.”

  Cortland nodded. “I agree, Scar. You’re wrong. I vote for Sean.”

  I glared at him. “This isn’t a vote.”

  Janice shifted her weight in her chair. “I agree with Ryan.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Well, it’s a good thing it wasn’t a vote.”

  Ryan looked at me. “Cool off tonight, but go back home tomorrow. This is a stupid argument anyway. You just need to compromise.”

  “No,” I said. “That’s not how I want to spend my wedding day.”

  “Talk to him,” Ryan said. “And work something out. Maybe you can have it there but reduce the number of people. Or bring his closest friends here. Or better yet, have two weddings. Whatever it is. But talk to him, Scar. You can’t just run away every time you’re pissed at him. In fact, I’m surprised he didn’t kick you out. You’re being a total brat right now.”

  I rose from my chair, grabbed my laptop, and walked into my bedroom. I didn’t want to hear their opinion anymore. I knew I was right. Sean was being insensitive to my feelings. I didn’t do anything wrong.

  12

  Sean and I hadn’t spoken in three days. He never called me, texted me, or called Ryan—as far as I knew. I thought it was odd. I assumed he would have apologized by now, but he was being as stubborn as I was.

  By the third day, I started to miss him. I was furious with him but I missed talking to him. I wanted to vent my feelings to him, but I knew I couldn’t since he was the one I was pissed at. And I missed being with him. Since we made love every day, at least twice a day, I felt the withdrawals coming along. I thought about calling him a few times, but I always stopped myself from making the call.

  I distracted myself with editing, falling into the world of the story. Ryan didn’t bring up Sean again and I was thankful for it. The four of us played basketball when the weather would permit it, and Cortland came into my room a few times to see how I was doing. He never directly asked about Sean, but I knew he was concerned.

  By the time I went to sleep that night, I was totally miserable. I missed Sean like crazy. I wished he would just apologize and give me what I wanted. Why was he being so stubborn? I refused to give in until he gave me what I wanted. I wasn’t getting married in Connecticut. It wasn’t going to happen.

  I rolled over in bed and looked out the window. The rain drops were pelting the glass and thudding against the walls. I loved the sound of the rain. Listening to it always made me feel relaxed. I loved waking up in Sean’s warm arms while we listened to the sound of the rain on the rooftop. Those were days we never left the bedroom, cho
osing to make love and nap all day.

  I heard my phone vibrate on the nightstand. I wondered who would be texting me at this hour. There was only one person I could think of and my heart leapt at the thought. When I looked at the screen, I saw the text message from Sean.

  I’m at the front door.

  My heart raced in my chest. It was past midnight and I knew he had work in the morning. I wondered what he wanted. I left my bedroom and walked down the hallway. I heard the quiet rocking of the headboard in my brother’s room. The sound made me smile. At least he was trying to be quiet. I felt bad for intruding on my brother’s life. Now that he had Janice I knew he needed his privacy.

  When I reached the door, I opened it.

  Sean’s jacket was soaked, and water still dripped from the material. Since I hadn’t seen him in three days, I forgot how beautiful he was. He was the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. I missed kissing him. My lips burned, and the flesh between my legs felt like it was on fire. He stared at me for a long time.

  Finally, I spoke. “Why are you here?”

  He shifted his weight and put his hands in his pockets. “I’m still livid with you, Scarlet. You really pissed me off and you’re being unreasonable.”

  I sighed. “You didn’t have to come all the way here just to tell me that.”

  He stared at me. “I tell you this so we’re clear about my expectations. I’m still waiting for an apology.”

  “So am I.”

  He sighed. “Fine.”

  “Well, have a good night then.” I started to close the door.

  He stopped it with his hand. “It’s been three days, Scar.”

  I knew what he meant.

  “And I want it.”

  I stared at the contours of his body and knew I wanted it too. I missed having sex with him. It was like going through sexual withdrawals. He pressed his face close to mine and stared at my lips.

  “How about you?”

  I licked my lips.

  He moaned. “Is that a yes?”

  I nodded.

  He grabbed my face and kissed me hard, harder than he normally did. His tongue was in my mouth and his hands gripped my breasts. He pushed me into the apartment then closed the door behind him.

  I grabbed his face and pulled his lips to mine, kissing him like it was the last time. His breaths came out hot and uneven. He pushed me against the wall and I felt his erection through his jeans. I moved my hands up his shirt and felt his chest and stomach. His hand slipped into my pajamas then underneath my underwear. He fingered me hard and almost made me come right then and there.