Careless

by Cheryl Douglas

  Trey shifted his cowboy hat back on his head so he could look her directly in the eye. “You think it’s easy to love people like us?”

  Tori smiled. “You? No. Me? Yes.”

  Trey rolled his eyes as he tried to hide his smile. “I’m serious. Half the world wants a piece of us, not because we’re good people, but because we’re rich and famous. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to love a woman like you, Tori. No matter how secure Mike is in who he is, there’s always gonna be this little voice in the back of his head tellin’ him you could have any man you wanted, so why should you be happy with a regular guy like him?”

  “You know that I’ve dated lots of guys who are rich and famous, Trey. None of them have ever made me feel the way he does.”

  “I know, honey, but does he?”

  “I hope so.”

  “That’s somethin’ you don’t wanna leave to chance, sweetheart. You just need to bite the bullet and tell him how you feel.”

  She reached up to brush a kiss across his cheek. “I will tonight. Thanks for helpin’ me figure things out.”

  He kissed her hand. “Hey, what’re friends for?”

  Chapter Twelve

  For the first time in a long time, Mike was nervous as he pulled into Luc’s driveway. He’d been to plenty of his fancy launch parties over the years, but he’d never had a woman like Tori on his arm before. They all knew and loved her already, but when their family and friends saw them together, as a couple, there were bound to be questions. He had no idea how she intended to handle it. Would she tell them they were just having fun, that it was nothing, or would she tell them she hoped it was the start of something special? He tipped his head back and said a silent prayer for the latter.

  The valet took the keys to Mike’s truck as he nodded and slipped him a bill. He took the stairs two at a time, anxious to see the woman who had been drifting in and out of his mind all day. He’d interviewed her other two lovers earlier, and it damn near killed him, having to sit there and listen to another man tell him how special Tori was.

  He rang the doorbell and waited for one of the uniformed wait staff to check his name on the guest list before ushering him inside. It didn’t take long for the sound of her husky laughter to permeate the white noise, drawing his attention.

  Tori was wearing a black, strapless cocktail dress and high spiked heels. Her long blond hair was twisted into a fancy top knot. She looked radiant as she sipped from a champagne flute. More than anything, he wanted to believe he had something to do with the spark of happiness he saw in her beautiful eyes. How had he been able to fool himself into believing she meant nothing to him for so long, when it was so obvious she could easily be his everything?

  Jay and his wife, Victoria, came up behind him and Jay passed him a cold bottle of beer. “I knew you wouldn’t want none of the champagne they’re passin’ around.”

  Mike had never felt more like celebrating as his eyes locked with Tori’s and she raised her glass to him, a smile on her glossy lips.

  “Wow,” Victoria said, fanning herself. “Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?”

  “Sorry, hon,” Mike said, tearing his eyes away from Tori long enough to focus on his sister-in-law. He leaned in to kiss her cheek. “You look gorgeous, as always.”

  Victoria snorted as she rolled her eyes at him. “I could be prancin’ around here half-naked and you wouldn’t even notice.”

  Her husband raised his eyebrows. “Now that I’d liked to see.”

  She slapped his chest. “Behave yourself.”

  Mike’s heart clenched when he watched his brother pull his wife close and whisper something in her ear. For the first time, he envied what Jay had. The beautiful woman to come home to, the baby girl who thought the world began and ended with her daddy. He wanted that… with Tori.

  “Excuse me, guys. I need a minute with Tori before the party gets under way.”

  She was talking to a group of men he didn’t recognize, but he couldn’t wait another second to get her alone. He’d been holding his tongue, afraid to put himself out there in case he got hurt again, but it didn’t matter anymore. The only thing on his mind was telling her how he felt, now, before it was too late.

  “Sweetheart,” he said, coming up behind her, slipping an arm around her waist, in case any of the guys in her tight circle had any ideas about making a move. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I was hopin’ to steal you away for a minute.”

  “Um…” She looked up at him and smiled. “Let me introduce you to some of my crew.” She gestured to a balding man with glasses. “This is Danny, one of the lighting guys.”

  Mike dutifully shook the man’s hand. “Mike Cooper, nice to meet you.”

  “Hey, you related to Josh?” the man asked, bringing a glass of beer to his lips.

  “Yeah, he’s my father.”

  “Me and Josh go way back. Ever since I started workin’ for Trey back in the day. Man, I could tell you some stories about the trouble me and your old man got into at Jimmy’s—”

  “I’m sorry,” Mike said, holding his hand up. “I’d love to hear about that. Later, maybe?”

  Danny shrugged. “Sure, no problem.”

  “Excuse us, guys,” Mike said to the rest of the group as he took Tori’s hand and led her outside. There were several groups gathered and all of them turned their attention to Tori as though they felt her presence.

  She smiled as she raised her hand in greeting. “Hey, y’all.”

  The last thing Mike wanted was to share her with her adoring public tonight. “Let’s head back to the pool house.”

  “What? Why?” she whispered, smiling politely at the people she knew as they tried to engage her in conversation.

  “Mike, I’m here to mingle. How the hell am I supposed to do that if I’m locked away in Luc’s pool house with you?”

  “Please, just give me a minute.” His heart was pounding harder than it did when he went full-out on the treadmill at the gym. Thankfully, the door was unlocked and they were able to slip inside unnoticed.

  “This is crazy,” she said, laughing as she watched him turn the lock. “What’re you doin’?”

  “I can’t stop thinkin’ about you, Tori.” He crossed the tile floor as he ran his hands through his hair. He didn’t trust himself to get close to her until he’d said everything he needed to say. “I don’t wanna stop thinkin’ about you.”

  She sat on the arm of the upholstered loveseat and waited for him to continue.

  “I wanna be with you, all the time. I need to be able to call you in the middle of the day… just to tell you I love you. I don’t want to come home to an empty apartment anymore. I want to come home to you.”

  “Mike, I…”

  “Please, just let me finish.” Even if she shot him down again, at least he’d know he hadn’t held back. “I interviewed those other two guys today, the names you gave me, and they talked to me about how much they’d loved you.” Just saying the words aloud twisted his gut. “They said they wanted more, but you couldn’t give it to them.

  “I need to know, is that the way it’s gonna be with us, too?” He walked over to her and dropped to one knee in front of her. “They said they fell in love with you, but you could never say it back. It reminded me of the other night, and I realized… maybe I’m just kiddin’ myself here.”

  She shook her head, trying to deny his claim, but he was too far gone to try to read her signals. “I don’t wanna end up like them, just another guy whose heart you broke ’cause you didn’t have the courage to tell him the truth.”

  Her eyes darkened and he knew he’d hit a nerve when she shifted back and glared at him. “You wanna know why I never let myself fall in love with any of those guys?”

  He gripped the sofa on either side of her, hoping she wasn’t intent on telling him something he wasn’t ready to hear. “No, why?”

  “When I was havin’ sex with them, I was pretendin’ it was you.”

  He drop
ped his head as the visual tore through his mind. Tori finding pleasure in another man’s arms… “I can’t listen to this,” he said, getting up.

  She fisted his jacket in her hand. “Oh, you’re damn well gonna listen. You think you get to call me out, and I’m supposed to just sit here and take it? Like hell. You were the one who brought up those other guys, and now you’re gonna hear about it whether you like it or not.”

  Once again, his big mouth bought him more trouble than he could handle. He knew her words had the power to leave him battered and bloody by the time she was finished with him. “Are you tryin’ to punish me? You wanna pay me back for kickin’ you out that night? Believe me, I’ve been payin’ for it every night for two long years. Every time I saw you at one of those parties… I’d have to watch you kiss him… touch him… let him touch you…” He clenched his fists. “I’d go home alone, and lie awake wonderin’ if he was makin’ love to you. If he was makin’ you feel the way I did.” He lowered his head.

  “No one has ever made me feel the way you did,” she whispered fiercely. “And that’s why I couldn’t even stand to look at you. It just brought it all back, the way your hands felt on my skin, the way it felt when you thrust inside me the first time…” She pushed his jacket off his shoulders. “Remind me what it feels like now.”

  There was so much he still needed to say, but he needed her more. “This isn’t over.” He took his jacket off and laid it over a chair.

  “No,” she said, watching him intently. “This is just the beginning.”

  “Don’t say that unless you mean it.” His hands flew over the buttons running the length of his shirt as he watched her kick her heels off.

  “I do mean—”

  “Tori, you in there?”

  The pounding on the door rattled the windows as Mike muttered a curse. “Him again?”

  “Be nice,” Tori whispered. “He’s just doin’ his job.”

  Mike crossed the room and threw the door open. “What the hell do you want?”

  Joe’s eyes drifted to Mike’s open shirt and he looked over his shoulder until he found what he was looking for: Tori. “Are you okay, honey?”

  Mike clenched his fist on the doorknob when he heard the casual endearment slip past his lips. How many other guys were just waiting in the wings for their chance with her? “She’s fine, now get lost.”

  Tori came up behind Mike and pressed her palm to his back. She smiled at Joe and Mike watched the guy’s whole demeanor change.

  “I’m fine. You go on back to the party and have a good time. We’ll be up in a bit.”

  He crossed his arms and glared at Mike. “No can do. Luc and Avery need you up there for pictures. Avery said she brought some songwriter…” He snapped his fingers. “What the hell’s his name… Tom… Todd… ah hell, I don’t know.” He glanced at Mike. “Apparently he’s your date tonight.”

  Mike spun around to face Tori. “He’s your what?” he shouted.

  Tori covered her hand with her mouth. “Oh God, I’m so sorry. I must’ve forgotten to tell Avery to cancel—”

  “You’re not seriously thinkin’ I’m gonna let you be here as some other guy’s date, are you?”

  “It’ll just be a few drinks, photo ops; he’s supposed to be the next big thing. He wrote songs for Keith, Carrie, Kelly…”

  She reached for him when he pushed past Joe and made his way across the lawn. “Mike, wait. Please. This is just business.”

  He wasn’t even going to dignify that with a response. She pretended to be into him, yet she was still dating other guys, letting the world think she was still looking for her Mr. Right. She’s made one thing painfully obvious: he wasn’t it.

  Tori was trying so hard to plaster a smile on her face, mingle with the crowd, entertain her date, but her heart was breaking. She’d done it again, driven him away. He’d said everything she’d been waiting to hear, but instead of saying it back, she froze.

  She knew he’d been waiting for her to publicly acknowledge her feelings for him tonight in front of their family and friends, but instead of giving him what he deserved, she’d put her career first.

  Victoria stood silently beside Tori for a moment before reaching for a glass of champagne on a passing waiter’s tray. She handed it to her with a smile. “You look like you could use this.”

  Tori reached for the glass, grateful she didn’t have to worry about driving tonight. “What I could use is a double shot of Jack Daniels, but since the press is crawlin’ all over the place, Avery said I need to be on my best behavior.” She took a healthy swig of the champagne as she glared at her publicist over the top of her glass.

  She hated to being told what to wear, drink, eat… No, she could live with that. What she couldn’t live with was being told who to date. “I made a stupid mistake tonight, Victoria.”

  “Is that why my brother-in-law stormed out of here looking like he was ready to take out anyone who was stupid enough to get in his way?”

  “Mike told me he was in love with me, and I basically told him I was in love with my career.”

  Victoria winced. “Ouch.”

  “Yeah, tell me about it.”

  “So, what’re you gonna do about it?”

  She threw back the contents of her glass. “Get drunk for starters.”

  “We both know that’s not gonna solve your problems.”

  “If you’ve got any bright ideas, I’m listenin’.”

  Victoria reached for her hand and led her into a small, private sitting room that was blessedly free of guests. “Sit down, and tell me exactly what happened.”

  Tori was exhausted. She was tired of looking over her shoulder, tired of guarding her heart, and tired of pretending to be the public persona everyone expected her to be twenty-four seven. She just wanted to share some of her burden with someone, and since she’d alienated Mike again, his sister-in-law would have to share her suffering in his place. “Remember the night we met at the birthday party?”

  “Yeah, what about it?”

  “Mike and I slept together that night.”

  Victoria laughed. “I can’t say I’m surprised.”

  “Yeah, well, I sure as hell was when he kicked me out as soon as the deed was done. I’ve barely spoke to him again, until—”

  “He was assigned to this case?”

  “Right.”

  “Since you guys were kind of thrown together, you had no choice but to talk about what happened, huh?”

  “Yeah.” Tori sank back in the chair and closed her eyes. “I didn’t want to let myself feel anything for him. I was convinced he’d hurt me again, but I couldn’t help myself. I fell for him, hard, fast…” She sighed. “And I’m afraid this time there’s no turnin’ back.”

  “He obviously feels the same way, so what’s the problem?”

  “I was gonna tell him how I felt about him tonight, but I couldn’t. He started talkin’ and all these things kept runnin’ through my head, like—does he know what he’s getting’ himself into, fallin’ in love with a woman who spends half her life livin’ out of a suitcase?”

  “Why don’t you ask him?”

  “He’s not talkin’ to me. Not that I blame him.” She rubbed her temples when the ache in the back of her head migrated. “Joe came in and announced my date was here.”

  Victoria’s mouth fell open. “No!”

  “Yup, and instead of telling this guy, Todd, Tom, whatever the hell his name is, I already have a date, I tried to tell Mike it was just business.” She groaned as she remembered the look on his face when she tried to sell him that bill of goods. “What I should’ve done is told Avery to mind her own damn business and given those tabloid rags somethin’ to write about tomorrow.”

  “It’s not too late. You can go and have a little chat with your publicist right now.”

  “You’re right, I should.” Tori stood up and straightened her dress. “Thanks, Vic.”

  “Oh, and just so you know, we’re headin’ home soon. You k
now, in case there’s anywhere you’d like us to drop you.” She winked. “In that dress, you look too good to resist.”

  “You really think he’d wanna see me right now?”

  “I think the more important question is, do you wanna see him?”

  “Yes! Hell, yes!”

  Victoria laughed. “Then it’s settled. You’ve got five minutes to set your publicist straight. We’ll meet you outside.”

  Tori quickly maneuvered her way through the throngs of guests trying to get her attention. Nothing was more important than seeing Mike. As soon as she spotted Avery talking to Lexi and Sierra, she grabbed her elbow. “Excuse me, you and me need to get a few things straight.” She didn’t care that her friends were looking on. It was time for her to let the world know how she felt.

  “Tori,” Avery hissed, “have you been drinking?”

  “Not nearly enough.” She pointed a finger at Avery. “I put up with a lot because I assumed y’all knew what was best for my career. But we’re not talkin’ about my career anymore, we’re talkin’ about my life, and nobody runs that but me.”

  Avery took a step back. “Are you crazy? I’m not trying to run your life.”

  “You tell me where to go…” She started ticking the items off on her fingers one by one. “What to wear, eat, drink, who to date…” She glared at her. “And that’s the one I have a problem with. I’m in love with Mike, and I may have lost him thanks to you.”

  “Me? What did I do?”

  “You told me I had to meet some up-and-coming songwriter. Why, for the love of God? I write my own goddamn music!”

  “Lower your voice,” Avery whispered. “People are starting to stare.”

  “I don’t care. Let ’em stare.”

  “Look, I know you’re upset,” Avery said, stroking her shoulder. “You just go home, get a good night’s sleep, and we’ll talk about this in the morning.”

  “Avery, you know I love you and Ty, and I respect you, but I can’t go on livin’ this way. I know I signed on for this, but I didn’t know it was gonna cost me everything that meant anything to me. I love Mike. I want to be with him. He’s the only thing that matters to me right now, not this tour or the goddamn stalker or makin’ more money than I’ll ever be able to spend.”