Breaking Down (The Breaking Series)

by Smith, Calista

  “Am I missing something here? Did I say something wrong?” Aiden was looking around at all of our faces, still confused.

  “Fine,” She said tightly. I thought she was conceding and about to agree to go in. But she continued angrily, “You two want to pretend that everything is all hunky-dory, that’s on you. Something’s up. I am not going to sit here and pretend with you. I know you Raquel. I know you are hiding something. I don’t know what it is, or why the hell you would hide it from me. What I do know is, you better tell me and tell me soon.” She slammed her hands onto the table top.

  “Whoa, Babe, calm down. What’s up? What happened?” Aiden was now trying to calm her down.

  “They are hiding something, Aiden. Something’s up. They’ve been acting weird all day,” She turned to me with tears in her eyes. “You swore to me, Raquel. You swore.”

  “I didn’t.” I quietly argued. She stopped, I was sure she was replaying the earlier conversation. “Dante interrupted before I had to. I never swore to you, Nat. I wouldn’t do that to you. You know that. You should know that.”

  “Tell me.” She was wiping her tears. “Tell me now, please?” She looked at Dante. He looked at me and I could see the fear in his eyes. My eyes were pleading with him. I wanted to tell Nat. I needed her to know. She would know what to do, she always did.

  “She’s pregnant.” Dante whispered. I heard Nat and Aiden gasp simultaneously. The tears were falling like hot coals onto my cheeks. No one moved.

  “How long?” Aiden was visibly concerned.

  “I don’t know. I just found out, today.” He said.

  Nat was watching me, her eyes intense. “What are you going to do?” She asked through her tears.

  “I don’t know, yet.” I said, my voice low.

  “Are you sure? I mean that you are?” She asked.

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  She stood up and rounded the table hugging me tight. “You should have said something, you stupid. You should have called me right away. We’ll figure it out okay? It’s going to be okay.” She rocked me as I sobbed in her chest.

  “Nat, we’ll figure it out. I’m going to help her figure it out.” We both looked at Dante and Nat’s eyes were shooting daggers his way.

  “What exactly, are you planning on doing, to help her figure out?” She said through gritted teeth. I pulled on her arm, trying to get her to leave it alone.

  “Whatever we need to figure out is between us.” He said.

  “Oh really, between you? Hmm, well if I remember correctly you are leaving. You’re not going to be here. I’m the one who has been here for her, Dante. She and I have always been there for each other. And when you are gone, I will be here. Besides, you’re the reason she’s in this predicament.” She poked his chest.

  “Nat, that’s not fair. He didn’t do it by himself. Come on.” I tried to calm her down, pulling her away from him.

  “Natalia, let’s let them figure it out ok?” Aiden stood up between Nat and Dante, placing his hand on her lower back.

  “Can we talk you guys?” I looked at Dante and Aiden. Nat put her hands on her hips in defiance as she stared at the boys, expecting them to hurry and leave us. They both went into the house. Good, Dante needed to talk to Aiden.

  “Natty, thank you.” I said, once they were gone.

  “For what?”

  “For always being here for me. I love you for that. I wish I could be there for you, like you are for me. I seem to always be the one in need.” I sniffled.

  “Shut up! I don’t see it that way at all. Raquel, we are there for each other. Why didn’t you tell me right away?” I could see the hurt in her eyes.

  “I wanted to, but I was scared. I had no idea what to think. Plus we had graduation, so I figured I would tell you after. But then there was the party and then Aiden’s proposal. I didn’t want to ruin the night for you.”

  “Yea, I guess I can see how you didn’t really have a chance.” She said. “So what are you going to do, Rock? Are you going to keep it?”

  “I had no plan in place after I found out. All I could do was freak. You know, I never really thought about having kids. And then thinking about Dante’s future,” I made a face “And my future too, you know? I didn’t picture kids in that mix.”

  “Yea, but now? You said that’s how you felt after you found out, but now that you’ve thought about it, what do you think?” She asked.

  “I can’t. I can’t not have Dante’s and my baby.” My eyes began tearing up again. “I love him.”

  “Well, there you go.” She laid her hand on mine. “It’s going to be okay. I mean it. I will be here, no matter what happens with Dante, okay?”

  “I know, Nat. Thank you.” I hugged her.

  “Has he said what he wants to do?” She asked.

  “No, we haven’t really talked about going either way. We haven’t had a chance to really talk things through.”

  “Well, talk to him. I’ll go get him.” She smiled scooting out of her chair and going into the house.

  Moments later Dante came out and sat with me. “Whew, so she was pretty mad.”

  “She was worried.” I corrected him.

  “She apologized.” He said.

  “Natalia?” I was shocked.

  “Yea, she said she got scared for you and kind of took it out on me. I understand. I didn’t want her to think I was leaving you high and dry to deal with this. I’m here too, Raquel.” He looked up from where he was playing with the tips of my fingers.

  “I know. Thank you.”

  “So, what now?” He kissed my hand and then went back to playing with my finger tips.

  “What do you think? I mean, I want to know, like … where your head is at in all of this.” I watched his face for any sign of what he was thinking.

  “I guess I’ve been kind of waiting on you. Trying to figure out what you wanted to do.”

  “If it were up to you, what would you do?” I put it back on him. I needed to know what he felt. I already knew my decision.

  “I don’t know. I mean on one hand I think, this kind of puts a wrench in both of our plans for our future. On the other hand I think, well … maybe it's fate. You know, keeping us tied together, somehow.” He looked at me and then looked back down again.

  “How so?”

  “Well, you know you were planning on traveling and I would be traveling and who knows where that would take us. What obstacles would come between us being together? If we are both on opposite sides of the world, committed to something else for years, I mean how could we, you know, carry on a relationship?” He said everything I feared before the baby was even a factor.

  “And how does this change that? I guess I’m not following you there.” I was still unsure of what he was getting at.

  “Well, if you chose to keep the baby you wouldn’t be leaving.” He finally said.

  What? Who said that? I could feel my blood start to boil and I pulled my hands away, straightening up in my chair. “Oh, okay so what your saying is, this way you could keep your future intact and I would give mine up for you and the baby?” The anger in my voice was clear.

  “Well Rock, come on. You weren’t planning to have the baby and then travel to some third world country with it. I was simply stating the obvious.”

  “But you would still be leaving.” I snapped.

  “For a good reason.”

  “As oppose to my stupid reasons?” Oh, he was really pissing me off now.

  “Why are you doing this? Why are you making this into a fight? I am trying to talk this through with you logically and it seems like you want it to be a fight.” He reached for my hands again.

  I folded my arms across my chest. He thought he was being logical, but he was pissing me off. Why were his dreams okay to keep and mine expendable? Baby or no baby, I hated that he was making so many assumptions. So if I pursued my dreams, he didn’t think we would make it. But if he pursued his, I could wait around for him and then everything would
work out fine?

  “Will you please talk to me? I see your wheels turning. Just talk, no fighting okay?” He pulled my hands to him and tried to calm me, by playing with my finger tips again.

  “Fine!” I said, “I don’t think that us staying together should be based on this.” I pointed to my belly. “You basically told me that we wouldn’t be together if it weren’t for me keeping this baby. If I go to the Peace Corps you are giving up on us. If I stay here and wait around for you, then we have a chance. You expect me to sit here and wait for a chance to be with you. You want me to have this baby so that we have that chance.” I wasn’t asking. I was telling him exactly what I heard.

  “No, that’s not what I meant. If that’s how it came out, that wasn’t how I meant it.” He shook his head.

  “Then by all means, Dante, enlighten me. Because at this point I’m ready to walk out of here and tell you to stick it where the sun don’t shine.”

  The look on his face was one of shock and amusement. “You’re kind of funny when you get mad. You say the weirdest things, babe. Look, I was thinking, if you decide to keep it …” He rubbed his bald head and then grabbed my hands. “We should … get married.” He started talking fast, as my heart beat seemed to race his words. “The military would provide benefits for you and the baby. Where ever I got stationed, you two would go too. I wasn’t asking you to give up your dreams and wait around for a— a what-if. I was planning on taking care of you, both of you.” His eyes darted to my belly and back up to my eyes again.

  “Get married?” I worried my lip.

  “Yes. Get married.” He smiled, “If you wanted to.”

  “Are you asking me?” I could feel the tears burning in my eyes.

  “I— well, I guess I am.” I was trembling and my stomach was threatening to come out of my mouth. He grabbed my hand, swiftly swiping the infinity ring that I wore on my right hand as he got onto his knee in front of me.

  “Rocky, Raquel, Baby— you mean the world to me. I’ve never felt like I belonged anywhere before, but when I am with you— anywhere— everywhere, I feel like, like I’m home. I know I belong. You make me feel … whole. And I want you to know, my heart is forever yours. Would you please, pretty please…,” He gave me his adorable pout and then flashed his crooked smile, tilting his head to the side. “Make me the happiest man in the world and marry me?”

  The flood gates opened and I was crying like crazy, hiccupping in between loud sobs. “Yes. Yes, yes, Dante. I will. I do. I will, you have my heart always. Forever. I love you so much.” He placed the ring onto my left hand and lifted me up from the chair I was sitting in, holding me tight and rocking with me gently.

  The door to the house flew open and Nat and Aiden were hurrying out to us. “What happened? What’s wrong?” Nat was freaked out, having heard my crying.

  “Nothing.” Dante was laughing, which for some reason caused me to laugh. I was now a hysterical mess, half laughing half crying. I tried to tell Nat what he had done, but nothing I said was making any sense. She was frustrated and looked to Dante.

  “What the hell?” She smacked him.

  “She agreed to marry me.” He beamed.

  “Huh? You guys are? What?” She stammered as she looked at me. I nodded my head and hugged her.

  “Well, shit. Congrats man.” Aiden hugged Dante.

  “Thank you.” He said.

  We went in and I sat with Nat, explaining everything to her. She was happy for us, for me. How crazy, both of us were getting married. I was having a baby. I marveled at how life was changing, so much.

  CHAPTER 28

  The aftermath of graduation night was not as enjoyable. My morning sickness seemed to be hitting morning, noon and night. My mom thought I had the flu. I was too chicken to tell her the truth yet. Dante was not in agreement with me there. In fact he was pretty upset that I hadn’t gone to the doctor yet. I assured him I would. I didn’t want to use my parent’s insurance to do it. Instead, I opted for going to a clinic. It was easier for me. Yes, I know, a chicken.

  Insisting on driving me, Nat grilled me the entire time about when I would break down and explain my situation to my mom and dad. I knew I needed to, but I wasn’t exactly looking forward to the whole conversation. Hey parents, guess what? I’m having sex with Dante, I’m pregnant and oh, by the way, I’m getting married and not going to the Peace Corps after all. The thought alone had me wanting to make her pull over so I could puke.

  Luckily the clinic was a painless visit. Afterwards, Nat drove me straight to Dante’s house and dropped me off. He wasn’t too upset that I didn’t allow him to take me. He understood me wanting Natalia there.

  ***

  “So can you at least consider telling them, tomorrow? I mean now that it’s confirmed. You can’t hide it for long. They aren’t going to be happy if they find out later that my parents knew long before them. It’s only going to make it worse.” He said.

  “Let’s deal with telling your parents tonight and we’ll think about how to tell mine another time.” I didn’t want to tackle both in one day. I was stressed enough.

  “Raquel. You’re stalling. It’s not going to get easier. It’s better to rip the band aid off.” He urged me.

  “Dante, it’s my band aid. You want to rip yours, fine, I support that. But let me handle my band aid the way I need to.”

  “You are so frustrating.” He kissed me hard on my lips. My eyes began tearing up. “What? Babe, why are you crying?”

  “That was so mean.” I covered my face.

  He moved to hug me and I smacked his arm away. “Come on, babe. I wasn’t— I didn’t mean it, Rocky.” He pulled my arms around his waist and kissed my forehead. “I really didn’t think you could get any more sensitive than you already were. You have proven me wrong. I am so sorry, I didn’t mean it. I will be extra careful about what I say to you. Okay, forgive me?”

  I peaked up at his face. “Yes.”

  He kissed me softly this time, “Thank you.” Then sitting me back onto his bed he scooted to my belly. I barely had a very tiny bump there. It wasn’t enough for anyone to really tell, anyone but Dante and I. And Natalia, once I showed it to her. My clothes still pretty much fit. I opted for wearing sun dresses lately so my mom wouldn’t happen to notice, by some odd chance.

  “Just wait till you get here. God I hope you are a boy. Otherwise, I’m in big trouble if you are a girl and anything like your mama.” He rested his hands on my belly.

  “Hey!” I smacked his head. “Don’t tell the baby that. That’s not nice.” I placed my hands on the spot where he had spoken, “We don’t care if you’re a boy or a girl. We love you so much already, either way.”

  He looked up smiling wide, then scooted himself up the length of my body raising my dress as he made his way to my lips. “I love you.”

  “I love you too,” I kissed his soft lips.

  He gently made love to me. Savoring my body, showing me how much he loved me and this baby of ours.

  ***

  “I have something.” He smirked afterwards. “I know it’s kind of early to do this, but I couldn’t resist.” He jumped up getting into his top drawer. “Close your eyes.”

  “Dante.” I whined.

  “Come on babe, trust me.”

  I immediately closed my eyes. “Here.” I felt him lay something on my stomach.

  Keeping my eyes closed I sat up and then opened them. “Awe, baby.” I had the cheesiest smile as I looked at the cuddly soft light yellow blanket.

  “Yea I saw it at the store and it was so soft. I figured it’s a neutral color so it didn’t matter if it was a boy or girl.”

  “I love it.” I hugged it to me. “So, why were you in the baby section?” I laughed.

  “I was checking out the prices of diapers and stuff,” He shyly admitted. “I figured I better get an idea of what everything costs.”

  “You are going to be the best daddy ever!” I kissed him.

  ***

  A while
later, his parent’s finally came home from their dinner date.

  “Did you guys have a nice time?”

  “Yes, we did. Thank you for asking.” Mr. King smiled at me.

  “So what did you two want to talk to us about?” Mrs. King was eyeing Dante.

  He grabbed my hand and sat on the couch. His parents both sat opposite of us. “Well, first off let me say this. I’m head over heels in love with Raquel,” I smiled and squeezed his hand. “We are in love. I’ve asked her to marry me and she has agreed.”

  His mom turned her eyes to me with worry. “Why?”

  “Excuse me?” Dante snapped.

  Mr. King didn’t like that. “Dante, respect! You two are young, you have things mapped out for your futures and your mom is asking a legitimate question. Why now? Is this because of Aiden and Natalia?”

  “No this isn’t because of Aiden and Natalia.” He was angry but held back.

  “Why then?” Mrs. King looked to me once again. “Raquel, are you pregnant?”

  “That isn’t why!” Dante shot at her.

  “Dante!” Mr. King barked again.

  “Are you?” His mom asked me again, her face serious.

  I nodded as Dante’s jaw tightened. “That isn’t why.” He answered softer this time. “I love her. She loves me. She just happens to be pregnant and it makes sense for us. I’m not giving up my plans for my future. I’m including Raquel and our child in those plans now.”

  His parent’s eyes were both wide at this point and I feared a worse reaction when it came time to tell my own parents. I felt horrible for Dante.

  “What do your parent’s have to say about this, Raquel?” His mom continued to ask me the questions and not him.

  “I haven’t told them.” My voice came out raspy.

  “Why would that be?”

  “I haven’t had the courage.” I was ashamed but figured honesty was the best way to go.

  “How far along are you?”

  “Just shy of a couple of months.” I answered her, my voice uneven.

  Mr. King rose from his seat, where he had been quiet the entire time. “Well, I need time to process this. I’m going to excuse myself.” I watched as he left the room. I had no idea what to expect from either of them.