Finding the Sky

by A. M. Burns

  25

  THE STARS sparkled on the water. Dillon rode next to Scott as they left the deserted parking lot and headed down the well-trod trail toward where they had done their first swim. He’d seen the moon reflected on water before, but the moon wasn’t out and the stars were bright enough; once they got away from the glow of the lights on the bridge, they shone like pieces of glitter cast on the water.

  “Wow, that’s pretty,” Dillon said softly. Suddenly he felt like if he talked too loudly it would break the quiet taboo of nature that had settled around them, broken only by the clop of hooves.

  Scott turned in his saddle and looked back at Dillon. “What? Oh… the stars on the water?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ve seen it before, but it is really awesome. I bet you don’t get to see things like that in the city.” They reached their spot, and Scott swung down from Rusty.

  “We can barely see stars there.” Dillon got off Dusty. “People miss so much in the city. You don’t hear coyotes. The sound of sirens is what you fall to sleep to more often than not.” He tied the reins on the tree next to where Scott tied Rusty’s.

  “Yeah, around here if there’re sirens there’s a major problem.” Scott pulled off the backpack and started pulling off his clothes.

  As his heart raced, Dillon did the same. “Suits or no?”

  “It’s the middle of the night, unless we’ve got some asshole out here spotlighting fish, we’re all alone. What do you think?”

  The idea of swimming naked in the cool lake under the sparkling stars with Scott excited Dillon. He frantically finished getting his clothes off, hopping awkwardly to yank his socks free. They hit the water at the same time.

  Dillon caught hold of Scott and kissed him. “Thanks for thinking of this.”

  “I remembered how much fun we had at the Tubalds’ pond, but they came home last week, so that’s out until they leave town again.” Scott combed his hand slowly through Dillon’s wet hair.

  “The lake is better than the pond. It feels more… freeing? I don’t know exactly what it is. But I like it.” Dillon ran his hands down the hard planes of Scott’s back. He’d only recently realized that he could feel individual muscles when he did that, and it was awesome. Between them, his body quickened and hardened.

  Scott kissed him again. “I like it too.” Holding on to Dillon, Scott threw them both sideways, down and under the water.

  Dillon let go of Scott and spluttered as he came out of the water. “What was that for?”

  “We came down for a bit of swimming, didn’t we? We were hardly getting wet.”

  “You want to get wet?” With a hearty laugh, Dillon scooped a handful of water and lobbed it at Scott.

  For several minutes they played in the water, diving, splashing, and enjoying every minute of their time. Dillon felt free. Free of fear of the Shanks. Free of the city that caged him for his whole life. Free of care.

  He braced himself for something when Scott dove under the water, disappearing in the darkness. Then Scott grabbed his legs and slowly felt his way up Dillon’s body until he surfaced and kissed his way up the part of Dillon’s chest that was above water. His hands stayed on Dillon’s groin, feeling and stroking. Dillon hungrily kissed Scott as a hot urgent feeling rushed through him.

  “Can we take this to the shore?” Dillon asked when their lips finally parted. “I want to touch you all over.”

  Scott nodded. “Yes, please.” He grabbed Dillon’s hand, and they waded back to dry land.

  As they emerged from the water, it was obvious that Scott was as excited as Dillon was. Dillon wanted to grab hold and feel what Scott’s cock felt like.

  Scott grabbed the backpack and spread out a big fluffy towel like he’d done before; then he knelt at Dillon’s feet and reached up for his hands. “Come on down here.”

  Dillon took Scott’s hands and knelt beside him on the towel, surrendering to Scott’s body as the stars sparkled down on them. In the distance an owl hooted and a coyote howled.

  DILLON’S FEELING of freedom grew stronger as he rolled away from Scott when they decided it was time for a quick rinse in the lake before heading home. His body screamed for more, even though he was tired and spent. His legs shook slightly as he stood, and he reached out a hand to Scott’s shoulder to balance himself.

  Scott chuckled at him. “Legs a bit wobbly?”

  “Yeah. I never realized I could get wobbly from that.”

  “When it’s really good, you get wobbly.” Scott held Dillon’s hand and got to his feet. “And that was really awesome. You’re sure you’ve never done anything like that before?”

  “Nope. I can safely say I was a virgin in every way.”

  Scott hugged him. “And now you’re not, in several ways.” Scott’s kiss was soft and passionate. He leaned back while continuing to hold Dillon, as if trying to get a better look at him. “I’ve never told anyone this before, but then no one’s ever gotten ahold of me the way you have. When you’re around, I feel what a rabbit must feel when Mel has ahold of it. Your talons have sunk into me so far that I know you’ll never let go until I’m dead. But unlike that rabbit, I don’t care. I want you to hold me until I die, and I want to hold you until you die.”

  Dillon cocked his head and stared at Scott. “You realize that sounds fairly strange and morbid.”

  “Love is supposed to be strange. Dillon, I love you.”

  As the words passed Scott’s lips, Dillon thought his heart was going to explode. He hugged Scott as hard as he could and kissed him. “I love you too.”

  They stood on the bank kissing for several minutes until Dillon shivered, more from emotion than cold.

  “Come on.” Scott pulled Dillon toward the lake. “Let’s rinse off, get dressed, and head home.”

  Not really caring what they did as long as he could spend more time with Scott, Dillon followed him into the lake. This time their splashing was directed at cleaning themselves off instead of just playing; then laughing, they dashed back to the towels.

  Dillon was giddy with happiness as he mounted Dusty and they rode toward the house. If there was any lingering doubt in my mind about being gay, it’s gone. I’ve never felt so incredible. Nothing felt wrong or even majorly awkward. Yeah, it hurt a little bit. Even with Scott taking it slow for my first time, but after I relaxed, it felt amazing. Scott is so awesome. I don’t think things can get any better.

  Ahead of him Scott stopped Rusty and motioned for Dillon to look at something. A dark shape dove out of the tree and hit the edge of the water with a light splash. Seconds later, the shadow lifted off again with something long dangling from its talons. It disappeared into the trees.

  “What was that?” Dillon asked, riding up alongside Scott.

  “Barred owl. We’ve got a fair number of them along the lake. They like feeding on reptiles and the like, even fish sometimes.”

  “That was cool. What do you think it had?”

  “Snake most likely.” Scott put his heels to Rusty’s sides and the horse started walking again.

  The display of nature’s wonder just capped Dillon’s day, and he rode home happily next to Scott.

  26

  “DO I need to bring anything?” Dillon asked as Scott stood impatiently in his bedroom doorway.

  “Do you have a camera that’s better than the one on your phone?”

  “No.”

  “Then come on. Alex likes to do these things around sundown.”

  “Okay. You told Uncle Bryan?”

  “Yeah.” Scott turned down the hallway. “He said he’d meet us at the house.”

  “Where are we going to do it?” Dillon hurried to follow Scott.

  “Alex didn’t tell me.”

  Dillon made sure to lock the house as they left. When they walked down the driveway, he had the urge to run, but Scott maintained a steady, easy walk.

  “If you’re this excited now, what are you going to be like the first time you go hunting with us?” Scott ask
ed as they turned down the street.

  Dillon shrugged. “No idea. But I’ve been waiting all summer for this.”

  “After the first couple of times, unless it’s personal, these things get fairly routine.”

  “But this one is personal.” Dillon kicked at a large rock in the middle of the road. “This is the hawk Uncle Bryan and I brought in when I moved out here. It’s special on several levels.”

  “Yeah, she is. I guess you’re right.” Scott beamed at him. “She brought you down to my house for the first time and kept you coming back, at least at first.”

  “Just at first. Now I go down there for sexier reasons.” Dillon beamed back. Until he and Scott had their first encounter at the lake, he’d never believed that sex could be so important. From that first time, they’d gotten to the point where they had a lot of it. Uncle Bryan took to buying them large boxes of condoms. He said he didn’t mind, it let him know that they were being safe. But his relationship with Scott was a lot more than sex. He loved the things he was learning about the birds and country life in general.

  “There is that,” Scott agreed.

  Down the block, Alex’s van pulled out of their driveway and headed toward them. They stepped to the side of the road.

  Uncle Bryan was in the passenger seat. “Come on, you two. We were getting worried that you were going to be slow.”

  Scott opened the side door, and they climbed in.

  “I didn’t think we were being that slow.” Dillon fastened his seat belt.

  Alex chuckled. “You really weren’t. Even after all these years, I still get antsy when I’ve got birds to release. I want to make sure we have time to let everyone out before it gets dark.”

  “We’re not going to let them all go at once?” Dillon asked.

  “Not unless we want to be feeding the smaller birds to the red-tail,” Scott said. “We’ll let the songbirds go, then the screech owls after a few minutes. When we think we’ve given them time to get away, we’ll let the red-tail go.”

  “I didn’t realize she’d eat the other birds.” Dillon paused and thought about it for a moment. “I guess it makes sense that book on falconry you gave me to study says that they’re very versatile hunters, taking fur and feathers.”

  “Exactly.” Alex turned down the main road but headed away from Kerens. “I’m glad you’re studying that book. Do you think you want to try and get your license this fall, or wait until next year?”

  “I’ve been trying to talk him into waiting,” Uncle Bryan said before Dillon could. “But he seems fairly set on getting it done this year. Are you and Paul going to be able to help him build his mews to keep the bird in, or do I need to see about hiring someone? You know me, I suck at handyman work.”

  “Which is why all the handymen in the area love you so much,” Alex said. “Yeah, Paul and I will help him. It’ll take a couple of days for the hard work, and then the boys can finish it up. We make a point to help all our apprentices with their facilities, that way we know they’re up to standards, and our standards are a little higher than what the law requires.”

  “Cool,” Dillon said. He’d been studying for weeks. It gave him and Scott more excuses to spend time together. “I want to get going on things soon. I just can’t believe that you’ve lived so close to these guys and never wanted to get to know the birds better, Uncle Bryan.”

  “I’m not a hunter. I’ve gone out with Alex, Paul, and Scott a few times, and it’s kinda fun, but a bird’s a big responsibility and a bit of a time suck, so you’ve got to be prepared for that. Plus, other than the horses, I’m not a huge critter person. Why do you think I don’t have a dog?”

  Dillon frowned slightly as he thought about his mother, but it was easier to think about her than it had been a couple of months earlier. “That was always Mom’s excuse for us not having a dog: she wasn’t a critter person.”

  “And if you’re not an animal person, there’s not much you can do to change that.” Alex pulled down a short road that ended at the lake but was several miles south of where Dillon and Scott normally went. The small parking area was empty, and there was no boat dock.

  “If we were going to the lake, why didn’t we go to the spot closer to the house?” Dillon asked as he unbuckled his seat belt.

  “There’s normally fewer people around here,” Alex explained. “We don’t like a lot of spectators when we’re releasing birds ’cause you never know what’s going to happen. Sometimes the birds do unexpected things that don’t look that great to the public.”

  “Plus down here, we don’t have to worry about people watching us.” Scott squeezed Dillon’s hand and then opened the side door so they could get out.

  Alex opened the back of the van. There were six pet carriers stacked there and one large wooden box. Alex went to the top left carrier and opened it. A momentary stream of sparrows shot out and disappeared into the trees. Out of the next carrier flew blue birds that vanished as quickly as the sparrows had.

  Dillon watched openmouthed as all the birds flew off. He hadn’t been sure what to expect, but it was cool watching the birds that he’d helped Scott feed during the summer finally flying free. There was one scissor-tailed flycatcher that had much shorter tail feathers than the ones Dillon watched the first time he rode to the lake with Scott. Even without its tail feathers, it still looked graceful as it left Alex’s hand and soared out over the lake.

  The screech owls left in a tight group and vanished into the low bushes around the parking lot in a flurry of gray and red wings with lots of chittering and calling to each other. Once they made it into the cover, they all got quiet, except for one lone bird that had flown the wrong way and called for the others.

  “There’s always one,” Scott said, leaning against the side of the van.

  Dillon leaned next to him, wrapping his arm around Scott’s waist. “What do you mean?”

  “We always release the screech owls in a group like this. Most of these guys are from the various babies that came in late spring, early summer. They’ve grown up together so releasing them together is a good thing. It gives them a group to be with as they sort out being wild owls. But there’s always one who, for whatever reason, flies the wrong way and then spends time calling for the rest of them.”

  “Then we have to wait for it to calm down before we release bigger birds,” Alex added.

  Moments later the owl went silent.

  They stood there several more minutes as everything went still around them. Out on the lake, a speedboat zoomed past, kicking up a white plume. From what Dillon had seen of the area, it was as fast as things normally got, and he was finding he liked things slow and easy.

  “So, Dillon, do you want to do the honors?” Alex asked, offering him a falconry glove.

  Dillon let go of Scott. “Can I?”

  “Sure. You carried her to the center, I think it’s only fitting that you’re the one who helps her find the sky again.” Alex pulled the wooden box toward the back of the van and opened the door. He reached in quickly and pulled out the red-tailed hawk.

  She glared at them with the same intensity that she had the first day. But she didn’t struggle in Alex’s grasp as he turned to Dillon.

  “What do I do?” Dillon asked. A nervous knot formed in his gut.

  “See how I’m holding her?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Stand next to me and slip your hands in behind mine.” Alex held his arms out a little to give Dillon room.

  Seconds later Dillon had hold of the hawk again. She turned her head and nipped at his gloved fingers. “Now what?”

  “Now you toss her back, like this.” Scott demonstrated lofting the bird into the air. It looked a bit like taking a granny shot in basketball.

  “You ready to fly again?” Dillon asked the bird as he went to toss her into the sky.

  For a second, when he tossed her up, she seemed to hover in the sky, looking a bit like an odd brown football. Then she opened her wings and began flapping.
Dillon’s mouth fell open as he watched her gain altitude. It was the most incredible thing he’d ever seen. Right then he knew he had found his path in life. He had to experience the feelings that were going through him again. Like sex with Scott, it was something he wanted to do over and over again. A sense of peace and perfection flowed through him as the hawk he helped rescue found the sky and flew away. It didn’t matter that she didn’t turn around and thank him. All that mattered right then was that he had helped repair damage done by a careless human and given some beauty back to the world.

  He watched her fly until she was a tiny dot on the west side of the lake; then he turned and grabbed Scott. “That was so awesome!” He kissed Scott. “That was perfect. She was perfect. You are perfect. This is all perfect!”

  Scott laughed and kissed him again. “I think you’re excited about all this.”

  “Yeah, just a bit,” Uncle Bryan agreed.

  “It’s just so….”

  “Perfect?” Scott suggested.

  “Cool. I want to be doing this all the time.” He looked at Alex. “Can you teach me this, along with the falconry?”

  “I can. Or maybe we should send you to vet school with Scott. I think you two would make a great pair of rehabbers.”

  Dillon looked at Scott, still in his embrace. “You never told me you wanted to be a vet. That sounds awesome, as long as we can get to help the birds. I just want to help the birds.”

  Scott looked coy for a second. “I was going to surprise you with it right before we start back to school. Cool, huh?”

  “Yeah, it’s cool.” Dillon kissed him. “This is all cool.”

  “So now what?” Uncle Bryan asked. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m getting hungry.”

  Emotions were still exploding inside Dillon. “Give us a minute.” He took Scott’s hand and walked to the water’s edge. He stared off in the direction he’d seen the hawk vanish.