Hate to Crave You

by Bella Love-Wins

  He didn’t just look good.

  He looked delicious.

  He looked dangerous.

  He looked like a thousand sexy, secret dreams she’d never dared to let herself dwell on in the light of day, let alone admit to anyone.

  Now as the limo glided to a stop, she was hard-pressed to tear her eyes from him.

  “You’re staring,” Roman said softly, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

  “I’m sure I’m not the first woman to stare at you.” She wasn’t embarrassed. He looked like sex on a stick—he had to know that.

  “You’re not. But I can’t think of too many women who’ve been able to give me a hard-on just by stroking me with their eyes, the way you do.” He shifted in his seat, making it clear he wasn’t just saying that, either.

  Her eyes dropped to his lap.

  “Damn, Julianna. Do you want to make it impossible for me to get out of this limo in the next few hours or what?” He grimaced, but his words were delivered in good nature.

  She laughed, unable to control the curl of delight that twined through her. She loved knowing he reacted to her.

  “Our car is next, Mr. Montrose,” a voice said over the loudspeaker.

  Roman’s eyes shot to hers. “You need to behave or we’re going to give the crowd a lot more to talk about than needed.”

  “They’ll already be talking about us.”

  “But do they need to mention that I climbed out of the limo sporting wood while you were laughing?” he quipped.

  “I’m hardly laughing about your…state,” she finished delicately.

  He leaned across the limo and cupped her cheek. “What is it that has you laughing, beautiful Julianna?”

  She shook her head, unable to put it all into words. The limo pulled forward and she closed her hand over his wrist, squeezing lightly. “It’s show time. How many stares do you think we’ll get?”

  “All of them.” He let her tug her hand away and let his gaze sweep over her. “But a great many people will be looking at you because you’re so beautiful. You look like you’re made of gold in that dress.”

  Julianna shivered at his tone. “Thank you.”

  The limo door opened and Roman shifted away from her. His shoulders rose and fell on a sigh and she peered past him to catch sight of a bank of cameras. The New York elite had come out for this event and as always, the media had followed. Preparing to be blinded, she slid from the limo after Roman, accepting his offered hand.

  There was a fraction of a pause. If one wasn’t used to such events, they might not have noticed it, but both Roman and Julianna had been attending such events ever since they were old enough to do so and in that brief hesitation, they caught the faint surprise coming from reporters who were well versed in the rivalry between the two dynasty families.

  Julianna caught movement from the corner of her eye and put her on smile firmly into place just as the first camera flashed.

  Questions were shouted but neither of them answered. Each of them offered a wave and Roman stepped away for a brief moment as people shouted at Julianna to get a shot of her dress. She turned around to display the deep vee that ran between the twisted swathes of material that formed the shoulder straps. The dress was Grecian in style and flowed around her in layers. She wore a hammered collar of gold, one of the family’s designer pieces, around her neck, with a matching armband on her left forearm and a bracelet on the right.

  After a few more pictures, she reached for Roman and he was there as if they’d done this a thousand times.

  They were well-matched, something she’d noticed more than once.

  Briefly, she wondered what it would be like if they were free to pursue a relationship—a real one.

  “You’ve stolen the show,” Roman murmured into her ear as they made their way inside.

  “Hardly.” She was well aware that the show, as it were, hadn’t even started.

  She’d been right.

  Heads turned the moment they entered together and even though they’d been there nearly a half hour, they were still getting the eye.

  “I don’t think I’ve gotten this much attention since I fell on my butt during a ballet recital in sixth grade,” she said ruefully as they found a table off in a corner. A few couples still glanced their way, but since they were standing still, not many stared. It was a little obvious when they were no longer mingling.

  “I can’t imagine you falling on your butt. You’re so graceful,” Roman said.

  “You’d be surprised. My gawky stage was legendary.” She sighed theatrically as she tipped her head back to stare at him.

  “I’m not believing it.” He shook his head, a playful smile still in place.

  “Maybe when we dance, I’ll step on your foot to give you an idea.”

  “I won’t mind at all.” He brushed a strand of her hair back, his hand lingering longer than necessary.

  Long enough to make her heart race.

  “Would you like a drink?” he asked as he finally lowered his hand.

  “I’d love one. I’ll take a Cosmo.”

  As he left, she watched him until he was swallowed up by the crowd.

  “Hello, sister of mine.”

  At that familiar voice, she turned her head and smiled up into her brother’s face. “Hey!”

  She hugged him, then settled back on her feet to study him. To his credit, Joseph Castle looked sober. At least so far. Unable to stop herself, she glanced at the glass he held.

  The liquid in it was clear, but that didn’t tell her much. For all she knew, he was tossing back straight vodka.

  There were only a few things that Joseph took seriously in life and social functions such as this wasn’t one of them. Parties were. But this wasn’t his idea of a party. Women were another thing he took seriously—all sorts of women. And he did like his drugs and booze.

  Still, he was sober, or close enough at the moment, so she leaned in and kissed his cheek.

  She was gratified that she didn’t smell any booze on his breath and when she pulled back, she gave him an easier smile. “How are you? I haven’t seen you for a few weeks,” she said, taking his hand and squeezing it. She adored her older brother and hated what he was doing to himself.

  “I’ve been around.” His gaze strayed past her, a sardonic grin curling his lips. “I’ve got to say, you could have knocked me over with a feather when you came in here with a Montrose, Julianna. Are you trying to give our parents a heart attack?”

  Making a face at him, she said, “Just stop. Neither of us had a date so we decided to come together. It’s no big deal.”

  “Tell that to the press reps who were swooning over you outside. They didn’t even notice me coming in behind you.” His grin widened. “I won’t have to worry about reading any of that shit tomorrow about how I’m throwing my life down the toilet or all their bullshit prattle about why this Castle is such a waste of space. For once.”

  “Joseph…”

  He held up a hand. “Hey, it’s okay.” There was no bitterness in his tone and he gave her a gentle smile as he chucked her under the chin, like she was still a little girl. “I am throwing my life down the toilet. And I am a waste of space. I like it that way.”

  “You’re not a waste of space,” she said hotly. She was furiously protective of her family, even if Joseph was determined to kill himself via booze or drugs one of these days. Maybe that was why she was so protective of him.

  He laughed softly and dipped his head to kiss her cheek. “Always my cheerleader, Jules.” He backed up a step, nodding past her. “Your date is on his way back.”

  He turned to go, then looked back at her, a frown replacing the smile on his face. “Listen, sweetie. Be careful, whatever it is you’re doing here. There’s a lot of bad blood between our families. Stubborn as you are, that doesn’t go away overnight.”

  “If you’re here to talk about the deal, I know nothing.”

  Julianna laughed as Moira Templeton held
up her hands in mock self-defense. Swatting her friend on the arm, she said, “You know me better than that.”

  “True.” Moira’s eyes gleamed and she gave a subtle look around before focusing blazing green eyes on Julianna. “What is the deal with you and Roman? Are you trying to shock the entire community showing up here together?”

  “I’m almost positive the entire community isn’t that invested in my social life.” She rolled her eyes at Moira and hooked her arm with her friend’s, guiding her a little farther away from the chaos that lingered near the dance floor. “Come on, I want a table to lean on for a few minutes.”

  She and Roman had danced a few times, but they had indeed drawn some stares and she wanted to get away from the attention for a while. He was out mingling and circulating, which was what she should do, and she would, soon.

  But she hadn’t seen Moira in ages and wanted a few minutes to catch up. They’d gone to college together and with their similar backgrounds, had ended up with a number of classes together. They’d gotten close but life after school had pulled them apart.

  “You just want to get away from the people whispering and speculating about your date,” Moira said mischievously.

  “Oh, bite me.” Julianna smiled, oozing with charm as she said it, not willing to refute the comment. There was no point. When you were as close as Moira and Julianna were—or as close as they’d once been—it was a little harder to pull off a convincing lie.

  “I’d rather bite him.” Moira sighed lavishly and winked at Julianna. “If things take a turn for the worse, I’ll take him off your hands. Because we’re friends.”

  “Again…bite me.” She nudged Moira in the ribs in jest.

  “Table!” Moira all but lunged to the left as a couple vacated it, leaving it open for a few brief seconds before the two women claimed it. They sat down gratefully.

  Under the concealing surface, Julianna slipped her feet out of her shoes. The Ferragamo’s she’d chosen to wear with her dress did excellent things for her legs but terrible things to her feet. But that was women’s fashion for you.

  “So how long has this been going on?” Moira asked.

  Julianna rolled her eyes. “There is no this,” she said. “We came together. End of story.”

  “And there’s…nothing else?”

  Julianna’s cheeks heated and the dim light wasn’t enough to conceal it at this close range.

  Moira hooted with laughter. “I knew it—it was the way he watched you. Please, please…tell me. Is he as beautiful in bed as I think he is?”

  Julianna fanned herself in lieu of answering, rolling her eyes.

  Moira pretended to wilt. “Lucky bitch.”

  They grinned at each other in the way only friends can.

  For a few more minutes, they chatted, then Roman appeared at her elbow, a black brow cocked to a dangerously sexy angle. “Trying to get an edge up on me, are you?”

  Before she could even figure out how to answer, Moira swatted him on the arm. “You know better, Roman. I don’t play those games. That’s my father’s arena, not mine.” Her eyes gleamed at him, cat-green and just as mischievous. “Julianna won’t tell me. How long has this been going on with you two?”

  “There is no this, Moira,” he said, chuckling. “We just decided to accompany each other. Sooner or later, some of us have to bury this animosity between the families after all. Isn’t that right, Julianna?”

  She smiled at him, but made no other response.

  Moira pouted prettily as she got to her feet. “Be that way. Here I was thinking I’d be the first one with the news for once.” With a huff, she bent over and kissed Julianna’s cheek. “Call me. We need to have lunch. It’s been ages.”

  “I will.” Julianna caught her hand and squeezed and Moira lost herself in the crowd while Roman took the seat she’d vacated.

  On the dais on the far side of the room, the band was wrapping things up and she said, “It sounds like the speeches are about to start.” She hesitated, then asked, “Do you want to hang around for that?”

  He covered her hand with his, playing his fingers over hers. “Not unless you really want to stay.”

  After slipping her shoes back on, they rose and made their way to the exit, fielding a few more greetings and making their goodbyes to the people they knew. By the time they actually reached the door, one of the hosts had taken the stand and was well into his welcome speech.

  The car was just pulling up as they stepped outside and Julianna slid him a look. “Excellent timing,” she noted.

  “I try.” He opened the door for her before his driver could get out and once she was inside, he slid in behind her, shutting the door. “I had a good time. Thank you for coming with me.”

  She stared into his eyes, just inches away. “I had fun myself. Thank you for asking me.”

  His lids drooped as he stared into her eyes and the distance between them shrank away to nothing as she swayed closer to him.

  When his mouth closed over hers, a low noise filled the air, but she didn’t know if it came from her or him. Hunger beat inside her, a living, breathing thing. Unable, or perhaps unwilling, to resist it, she slid in closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck.

  He responded by wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her into his lap. He broke the kiss briefly to hit a button which sent the partition between them and the driver up. As it glided upward, he said, “Take the long way,” to the driver.

  “You mind?” he asked, meeting her eyes.

  “Hell, no.” They could pull into a parking garage for all she cared.

  She wiggled around on his lap, the full, free cut of her skirt falling around her thighs, little barrier between them.

  It was even less of a barrier as she threw one leg over his hips, the material riding up to bunch around her hips as she arched against him. The feel of his cock was hot and heavy, a brand against the sensitive folds of her pussy and she was glad she’d foregone pantyhose when she’d been getting dressed.

  He shoved a hand in her hair, dislodging the few pins she’d used to help hold some of it up and away from her face. “You look so pretty and put together. I’ve been wanting to muss you up all night,” he whispered against her mouth.

  Any answer she might have made was smothered against his lips as he slid his tongue across the seam of hers, seeking entrance.

  She opened for him, moving against him, trying desperately to deepen the contact between them.

  “I’m going to come here and now if you keep that up,” he groaned against her mouth.

  She laughed, the thought delighting her.

  He slid his hands up and unzipped the concealed zipper at her side, tugging the dress down until her breasts were bared before him. The dress’s bodice was lined, making a bra unnecessary and she heard a mutter of appreciation escape him as he cupped her naked breasts in his hands. “You’ve been walking around in there practically naked under this,” he said, voice raw. “If I’d known that, I would have dragged you out of there hours ago. Hell, you might have never made it out of the car to begin with.”

  He slid his hand up her thigh and she shivered as his fingers brushed her panties.

  But he didn’t pull them off.

  He just stroked his thumb up and down the green-gold material as he kissed her again. One drugging kiss turned into another and she felt lost in him by the time he lifted his head.

  Dress pooled around her waist, the skirt rucked up over her thighs, she struggled to catch her breath as he stared down at her.

  “We should probably stop,” he said gruffly.

  “I don’t want to.” Boldly, Julianna reached down and closed her hand around him through the material of his tuxedo pants. The fine cloth stretched tight over him, allowing hardly any give. “And you don’t want to either.”

  “There’s a lot of things I don’t want to do, but I do them anyway. It’s part of being an adult.” But his lids drooped low over his eyes as he stared at her. “It’s
late. You’ll have to get up early to finish up with the prototype. You should sleep.”

  “I’ve gone without sleep before, Roman.” She leaned in and pressed her mouth to the corner of his mouth. “I’d rather go home with you.”

  9

  Julianna

  They barely made it through the doors before he turned to her and yanked the straps of her dress back down, baring her breasts to him once more.

  Julianna head her breath catch, and her pulse began to pound fiercely as he boosted her up and closed his mouth around one aching tip.

  “Right here,” he said, his voice raw. “Right here.”

  She didn’t argue.

  He fumbled with her panties while she fought with his bowtie, yanking it off in the end and practically tearing at his buttons, desperate to feel skin.

  She was desperate for him, desperate for this.

  She felt the head of his cock passing over her, thick and smooth and then he filled her—

  “Fuck!” He pulled out and lowered her back to the ground. “I need a fucking rubber.”

  Blearily, she looked up at him as he backed away, then turned on his heel.

  He ran from the room, something that might have been comical, but want was an empty, aching hole in her middle. Spreading her fingers wider against the door at her back, she closed her eyes and drew in a deep, steadying breath.

  He was back before she’d let her second breath out and she kicked off her shoes as he shrugged out of his suit jacket and shirt, standing bare-chested in front of her. “You’re insanely beautiful,” she said, voice shaking.

  “I was thinking the same thing.” He dealt with the rubber then came back to her, boosting her up. The skirt fell to mid-thigh, bunching around them as he stepped between her legs. “Wrap your legs around me, Julianna.”

  She did and whimpered as it brought the head of his cock in contact with her aching cunt. “Please, Roman.”

  “Shhh…” He reached between them and grasped his length, holding steady as he thrust hard, spearing deep into her.

  She squirmed as he impaled her and it wasn’t until she’d taken all of him that she felt some measure of relief at the aching inside her. Then he withdrew. “Don’t…” she pleaded, barely able to stand the thought of being without him. Then he thrust deep again and she moaned, the sensation exquisite, beyond all definition.