The Mother
Page 21
“She looks just like you,” I say to her.
Sweetie smiles. She’s gorgeous, this girl. That smile must have been what bedazzled my son.
“Just like you,” Lloydie says. “Beautiful.”
“Thanks.”
“Do you have a name for her?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “I’ve got a couple of names in my head, but I don’t think they suit her. I’m still thinking about it.”
“I’ve got a dictionary of baby names at home,” I say. “I’ll bring it up in the morning.”
She smiles again, says, “Cool.”
My notebook is leaned against my raised knees in front of me. I need to write that statement tonight, need to find the words. I can hear the sound of Lloydie moving around in the loft above me, shifting boxes and big stuff, bringing things down. He is brushing dust off himself when he finally comes into the bedroom. He smiles at me. He looks like he has purpose.
“I’ve brought the pieces of Ryan’s cot down,” he says. “I hope all the screws are still there. I’m gonna start painting it in the morning. Should be dry in a couple of days.”
“I knew that was what you were doing.”
“Maybe we can go shopping for a mattress tomorrow?”
“Okay.”
“What you doing?”
“Nothing. I’ve done a rough draft of that second Victim Personal Statement. I just need to do a proper copy. I’ll give it to Nipa when she comes in the morning.”
“Does she know we’re not coming?”
“Yes. I told her. It’s fine.”
“I’m gonna have my shower. I’ll read it when I come out.”
I scrub out what I have written, begin again. “Okay.”
VICTIM PERSONAL STATEMENT (2ND)
You said your dream was to be alive when you’re older. My son is no longer alive, but he would have approved of your dream. He wanted the same thing, not just for himself, but for every living thing, and that would have included you. With Ryan in mind, I hope your dream comes true. I also hope with all my heart that one day you will come to understand what you have done, but I know you can never understand what you have done till you have learned to care. And for that reason, my greatest wish for you is love.
Acknowledgments
EVERYONE WHO HAS SUPPORTED ME during the writing of The Mother, who has provided the essential space, friendship, humor, shoulder, ears, and encouragement to enable me to get to The End, you have my heartfelt thanks and gratitude always.
I am indebted to my first readers—Danielle Acquah, Olcay Aniker, Corinne Dowd, Colin Edwards, Elizabeth Galloway, and Jaclyn Griffiths—for their insightful feedback and suggestions that helped to shape this novel. For invaluable discussions, pointers, and information, thank you very much to Shawn Bulbulia-McClean, Daryll Ellick, Paul Etheridge, Vicky Guedalla, Mark Ashford, Alistair Fruish, and Stephen Graham. For the germination of time itself, thank you to Jindra Adamova and Angelo Iuliano. And to Sukti Neogi, planter of seeds, thank you too.
For generosity of spirit, advice, and practical assistance, I would very much like to thank Robin Lockhart of Catalyst in Communities. I am indebted to Mandisa Knights for legal advice and her endeavors to keep me watertight. I apologize for liberties I have taken with that advice and embrace any resulting errors as mine alone. I would very much like to thank Hakim Kayizzi from East London for his inestimable assistance. I am also deeply grateful to Yvonne Lawson, of the Godwin Lawson Foundation, for being so receptive and open to the discussions that have had a huge impact on this novel.
Eve White, my agent, thank you for your inexhaustible optimism and your belief in my writing. Tracy Sherrod, Editorial Director at Amistad, thank you for your continued support, enthusiasm, and advice. And Sam Humphreys, Associate Publisher at Mantle, Pan Macmillan, thank you very much for your patience, guidance, and sound judgment. Much appreciated.
About the Author
YVVETTE EDWARDS, the author of the highly praised A Cupboard Full of Coats, has lived in London all her life. She resides in the East End and is married with three daughters and a stepson. The Mother is her second novel.
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Also by Yvvette Edwards
A Cupboard Full of Coats
Credits
Cover design by Robin Bilardello
Cover photograph © danchooalex/Getty Images
Copyright
THE MOTHER. Copyright © 2016 by Yvvette Edwards. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
FIRST EDITION
First published in the United Kingdom, in a different form, by Mantle, an imprint of Pan Macmillan, in 2016.
ISBN: 978-0-06-244077-8
EPub Edition MAY 2016 ISBN 9780062440808
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