Rebirth

by Valerie Willis

  Frustrated, he slammed the shower knob, turning the water off in an instant. Toweling off he approached the Medicine cabinet to pull out his cologne and deodorant. A dark flash in the mirror caught his attention and he paused. Furrowing his brow, he slowly opened the cabinet once more, reluctant at first. He reached a point where he could see a black symbol in the mirror’s reflection as it displayed the opposite mirror’s image. Something black stretched itself across his back.

  “What the…” Gaping at the tattooed image, he stammered to himself. “How the hell did that come about?”

  Reaching behind him, he rubbed at the skin that had the discoloration, but could not differentiate between the two areas. He studied it for some time, but the conclusion was simply that it was a mysterious tattoo. If he had gotten it that night, he would have known. Tattoos sting for quite some time after you get them, and this was a back piece that took up a lot of real estate. There was no mistaking the tribal imagery; Angelic wings etched into his back, abstract and organic in design.

  What the hell is going on with me? Did I go through a rebellious stage and forget?

  Baffled, he paced the living room floor for several minutes. There was no logic behind it. When did this appear? Was it there all week and I didn’t notice? Or maybe it showed up this morning? It seems to be a tattoo, but no scabbing? No pain? What in the hell is going on? Am I losing my mind or maybe I’m in a coma and this is all some wicked ass dream…

  He stood there lost at what to think or feel anymore. Glancing over at the clock, he had run out of time. Shoving on his jeans and a band shirt, he rushed out the door. Annoyed by his thoughts, he slapped on his earbuds as he straddled his motorcycle. As he took off down the quiet, late night streets, his ears were greeted with The Blackout’s song Save Ourselves. Music always had a way of reflecting his emotions and thoughts.

  Please don’t let this take away everything I have. I barely have anything left as it stands. I am so tired of being so alone…

  Parking in front of the church, the half-moon draped everything in a light glow. Pulling his helmet off, the frigid night nipped at his face as his breath steamed in gentle puffs. He stood there engulfed in the church’s shadow as he grimaced at it. Inside would decide if he would be getting his answers or possibly finding himself laid out on the floor again.

  A breeze cut across him as leaves slid and scraped across the sidewalk. He took in a deep breath and held it there as he opened the heavy wooden doors. Inside someone had taken the time to light the candles that sat on tall silver stands at both ends of the long pews. His eyes glided across every crevice he could see in the wavering light, but no one was present.

  The nerves in his spine and shoulders tightened and tickled as he took slow steps toward the front. He was aiming to sit in his usual spot, hoping some normalcy would calm the nerves that knotted with every passing second.

  Am I alone or is someone watching me? Please don’t let this be some sort of trap…

  Making it to his seat, he was paranoid. Staring up into the statue on the cross, he saw a different expression than the sorrowful one he had last seen. Tonight that granite body seemed alive as it hung in its tortured place. The wings were open wider than he had remembered before and in the moonlight, it still shadowed the pews. One could wonder whether it was shielding them or hiding them under those elegant wings. Hotan had never seen anyone associate wings to the crucifix. It almost seemed like a paradox in thought, but seeing it in practice was very much the opposite. The look was complete, or moreover, correct in sensation as he continued admiring the artisanship. It had a clear message of salvation and hope.

  A movement caught his attention and he squinted to focus in on the statue’s face. There was something wet crawling down the cheeks of the statue. The color of red faded into existence and it was clear that the crucifix was crying blood.

  What is going on? Am I witnessing a miracle? He opened his mouth but no words would come to him. Why does the color come to me for something like this? What is the importance of me being here to witness this?

  It seemed as if the statue had a slight smile and Hotan could feel his heart racing. Whether his reaction was fear, excitement, or panic was beyond his own understanding.

  “It is not often we get to see proof of his existence.” The voice was stern and smooth as it flowed from behind Hotan. “Sorry for running late, Hotan.”

  Looking towards the doors, Hotan saw the tall silver-haired man from his memory. He wore a white business suit, dark tie, and eyeglasses that complimented his eyes and face. He approached silent and slow, causing no alarm in his casual approach.

  “Who are you?” Narrowing his eyes, Hotan could not shake the sensation that he should know who this man was. “What’s going on he-”

  He had glanced back to the statue to see that there were no more signs of red wet tears down its face. The expressionless statue showed him no more sorrow as if the life had left it.

  “Sorry if I startled you.” He paused in his steps just a few rows from where Hotan sat. “I was hoping to take some time with you tonight and explain what is going on.”

  “Does this have to do with what happened to me a few nights ago?” Swallowing, Hotan continued with his questions. “You were here for that, right?”

  “Do you not remember?” The man furrowed his brow and tightened his lips, concerned by the questions. “Or do you only remember some of it?”

  “I only remember your face, nothing else.” Trying to keep calm, Hotan stood in hopes of getting his nerves to stop its ever tightening of his throat. “What the hell happened here? Who are you? What’s going on?”

  “My name is Talib.” Hotan’s heart skipped a beat as if he recognized the name from a past life. Talib pushed his glasses up as he spoke, “I am the element of Judgment, an immortal. What happened to you was a release of your powers when you were threatened. A defensive mechanism built in that protects you when your life is in danger. As for what is going on, I am still trying to figure it out myself.”

  “Immortal?” Hotan wanted to question him, but something deep inside urged him to take the information as fact. He turned his focus to the only logical piece of information. “My life was in danger? How?”

  “Geliah, the element of Fear, decided to take matters into his own hands. He has a vendetta against you and now he has found you. The man will not stop until he has killed you.” Talib watched as Hotan mulled the information over. “He believes that killing you will release the remnants of the spell, or curse as he refers to it. The conclusion he has come to is that he will become normal again, as if the spell had never happened. Unfortunately, he is sadly mistaken.”

  “A spell? Why would I have anything to do with a spell?” Now he was starting to feel skeptical as this crazy conversation continued. “I can only assume he’s one of these immortals like you. I don’t get how I could have possibly have anything to do with his past. I am 18 years old, it’s improbable for me to have anything to do with this.”

  “Do you remember anything about your former self?” Talib seemed to be paling as he cautiously spoke. “Anything at all?”

  “Former self?” Bewildered by the questions, Hotan had made it clear this was all sounding like a fantasy novel. “What do you mean by that? I don’t understand where this is going.”

  “You were the one that cast the spell. By the powers of the element of Rebirth, you had set in motion a spell of continuous reincarnation on all of us in hopes of allowing us to live a normal existence. Most of us had agreed to this, even knowing that we would never know who we were or remember one another.” Talib turned his back to Hotan as he continued. “As your brother, I was left as a watcher. For some reason you knew something might go wrong. Now I have been desperately searching for you, as well as those who have awakened, in hopes of figuring out what has gone wrong. Does any of this sound familiar?”

  “No.” Hotan’s mind echoed the word brother as if it had been a lost fact in his life. “To be hon
est, it sounds like a fairy tale.”

  “Perhaps it would since you do not recall anything at all.” Hotan could see that he had pulled a napkin from his coat pocket and was cleaning his glasses. “Just know that we have much to do if you are to master your powers. I am sorry that I underestimated the severity of the situation, little brother.”

  “All of this is just crazy. Why would you call me brothe-” It was as if the wind was sucked out of his lungs. An overwhelming sensation of truth hit him as he caught Talib’s glare. “You, you’re my brother?”

  “When was the last time you saw someone with natural silver hair, Hotan?” Talib closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. His voice was rich in trust and knowledge, unlike anyone else he had ever heard speak. “That much is apparent. I will need time to figure out a way around your inability to recall who you once were. Until then, you can take this time to continue to heal and digest the information I have given you. Perhaps when I see you next, a memory or two has surfaced?”

  “That’s it?” Panic now came over him as Talib started for the door. “You can’t dump all this nonsense on me and just leave! Don’t you know I have no one! No one’s left Talib! I am all alone! Don’t you even care?”

  “Sometimes sacrifices have to be made…” Talib disappeared through the doors.

  Hotan chased after him but by the time he made it outside, there were no signs of anyone. The wind had picked up speed and in the distance thunder rumbled.

  Why does everyone leave me? When will this loneliness stop?

  Chapter Five

  Hotan woke to the buzzing of his cellphone as it danced about on the coffee table. He rolled himself off the couch, standing to stretch his stiff muscles. Last night had been more of an annoyance and answered nothing. He had more questions and worse off, no means to contact Talib. His phone started another round of ringing and buzzing, demanding his attention. He sat down and saw that Shellie was calling.

  “Good Morning!” Shellie’s voice was loud and bright like always. “Are we still going out for lunch today?”

  “Crap, I completely forgot.” He smashed his hand into his face, rubbing the sleep from it. “What time is it?”

  “Noon-ish.” He could hear her sighing on the other end. “If you are not feeling up to it, we can reschedule or do something else.”

  “No, just give me a few to wake up and I’ll come get you.” Yawning, he finished rubbing his left eye with the palm of his hand. “Long as you are ok with that?”

  “Yea!” Her voice perked back up. “I’ll be here, ready to go! Bye, Hotan!”

  “Bye, Shel.” He hung up with her and stared down at his phone for several minutes.

  It was frustrating that Talib hadn’t left a number, or even an email. Anything would have been better than nothing at all. How could he just leave me like this? You can’t tell someone that you’re their only surviving family member and then walk out the door! But that’s exactly what you did. You told me some grand story and left.

  Jerking up off the couch, he stomped into the bathroom to splash cold water on his face. Staring himself in the eyes, he felt old and worn out.

  Former self? Is there some truth to it? Am I staring at a stranger in the mirror? Closing his eyes, he pictured the tribal wings that painted his entire back. Is that part of it? Do these wings hold the answer to me mastering these so-called powers of the element of Rebirth? What am I saying? Do I really believe this person’s radical story?

  Grabbing his helmet off the table, he headed out the door. Distracted and absorbed into his thoughts, he barely had enough time to stop before smacking into Annie. Once more, her hands were full as she fumbled for her keys. She had overloaded her arms with grocery bags this time. Hotan unloaded them from her so she could sort her keys out to unlock her apartment.

  “Thanks again.” She opened the door wide and took the bags. “Wait here a second. I needed to give you something.”

  “You need some work done?” He leaned in watching her as she placed her bags on the kitchen counter and grabbed up an envelope. “What’s that?”

  “A note for you, it came to me with a check.” She raised an eyebrow at him as she handed it over. “You didn’t tell me you managed to get a sponsor.”

  “Sponsor?” Baffled he opened the letter. “I have no idea what you’re talking about…”

  His voice trailed off as he read the letter:

  Hotan,

  Consider this a token of good faith. Your rent has been taken care of for the next year.

  Your sponsor,

  Jacob

  “I, I don’t know who this is?” He looked at her with nothing else to say.

  “You don’t?” She smirked bashfully to herself. “Well, whoever he was, he was hot.”

  “Are you kidding?” Folding the letter up, he tucked it into his back pocket. “What did he look like?”

  “Taller than you, very handsome,” Blushing, she could no longer look Hotan in the eye. “Short blonde hair, deep blue eyes that look purple, and this awesome tribal deer head with horns tattooed across his entire back.”

  “Was he shirtless or something? Are you sure the guy who delivered this was the same one that wrote it?” Confused, he continued to ask more questions. “When did he come by? What time?”

  “It had to be close to midnight last night. His name was Jacob, isn’t that who signed that?” Red cheeked, she sighed. “He left about 6 am this morning for work, but I didn’t catch where that was. All I know is he grumbled on about downtown traffic.”

  Hotan stood there in silence as he processed what Annie was implying. “Sometimes I wonder about your habits, Annie. Have you ever tried dating first?”

  “Hush! If anyone else had said that I would have killed them. Besides, I’m 27; I think I am old enough to make my own decisions.” Rolling her eyes at him, she waved at him. “Bye, Hotan. I need to get this stuff put away. My ice cream is melting.”

  “Just be careful, that’s all I am asking.” She shut the door, and he continued his path out the door.

  As he made his way to Shellie’s house, he weighed the information in his mind. A sign of good faith? This has to do with Talib, I know it. Who the hell is this Jacob? Is he one of us? A tribal tattoo across his back as well, maybe there is a connection after all. Then again, every suave guy has a tattoo, if not across his back then on his biceps. Why pose as a sponsor? Why even attempt to support me on a financial level? I can’t help but feel it’s out of guilt. I am not into taking charity from anyone, but they knew to take it to Annie, and not me. Oh, Annie… you make horrible decisions at times. Sleeping with the messenger was a bit much. I don’t think this can get any more complicated…

  He picked up Shellie and they headed to their destination. This was his chance to be able to take a moment away from the chaos. At least taking her out to lunch gave him a moment to forget what he had no control over. They were pulling into Benny’s Place, a diner just a block away from the club where they played. It was a popular eatery and most of the high school kids worked at the 24-hour restaurant. It definitely beat working at the fast food joints and the tips were decent. The hostess smiled as she seated them at their normal booth. It was against the front windows that looked out onto the main street. The weather was decent, but it was still windy after last night’s storms.

  They had missed the lunch crowd and only a few patrons were occupying the place. A woman shook her newspaper at the bar top as she sipped her coffee, flicking her long braid off her shoulders. At another booth were two men, one with a laptop, as they discussed business over their late lunches. Looking back at Shellie, who had sat across the booth from him, she smiled.

  Should I tell her about this nonsense? Would she even believe me? No, I shouldn’t worry her, she’s already paranoid about what happened to me. Maybe I can tip toe around the crazier details?

  Hotan found himself staring at the poor little bookstore across the street. It had always been out of place among the newer buildings, much
like the church that he admired. Lagging behind the times, he could relate to it. Like him, it didn’t fit in with everything else around it. Feeling out of place is how he felt, in school, in life. His situation weighed heavier on his shoulders as he stared at the store.

  He wasn’t the same as everyone around him, that fact has been clear since the day he was born. Looking back at Shellie, she stared at him with her cute smile, cheerful. She had no idea how much he wished to be normal like her.

  How do I tell her that I am not like her? Maybe it’s true, I’m one of these immortal people, no longer a human being. It would at least explain the displacement I have felt all this time.

  “So what’s wrong with you? You usually speak a few more words than this.” Shellie’s smile had faded. “Are you still sick?”

  “I recently ran into my brother.” He gave her a funny look, trying to decide what he was attempting to do. “Sorry, I am feeling better though. Just dealing with… stuff.”

  “Brother? I thought you had no family left? You never told me you had a brother.” Shellie leaned back in her seat feeling she had missed something. “How many more secrets do you have?”

  “Not many. As for having a brother, I had no idea I had one either.” Shrugging he continued, feeling some relief in discussing his recent problems. “His name’s Talib. Nice guy, but a little strange. He came out of nowhere, literally. I’m still in shock and confused about it. It’s a lot to take in. I just, don’t know what to do with the information.”

  “A little strange? You two must be related. I assume he’s older? I couldn’t imagine your mom sneaking off to have another kid after you.” She grinned, trying to change the atmosphere to a more positive one. “So, when do I get to meet this brother of yours? Is he still around or is he a true Samuels and has mysteriously left?”

  “Don’t know. Not sure if he’s from my mom’s side, dad’s side, or possibly both. Definitely older than me. I guess whenever he decides to come back to town again I’ll see about introducing you to him. He had to leave to take care of some things apparently.” Averting Shellie’s eyes, he saw Kyle walk into the restaurant. A bouquet of flowers in his hands, he wrangled up their tall, dark haired waitress. “Did I miss something? When did Kyle become a romantic?”