The Game-Kirsten Backhard

by Shawnte Borris

  “This is the first song that we ever danced to.” I sighed.

  Drew smiled and placed one of my arms behind his back, and he held the other one close to his chest. He leaned his forehead on mine and took a deep breath as we started to sway.

  “When I tell you I love you, it means so much more than just three little words. It means that your happiness is more important to me than my own. It means that I always want to be there for you, no matter what happens. It means that I would rather be with you than anyone else in the world. It means that you’re not only my partner in my life but also my very best friend.”

  Oh my god! Is he proposing. I can’t breathe.

  “Kirsten, the more we’re together, the more the words I love you mean. Sweetheart, with all my love, I’m hoping you will become my wife.” Drew stopped us from dancing and lifted my chin to look me in the eyes.

  I had instant tears, so I closed my eyes and shook my head.

  Drew wiped my tears away. “Kirsten, will you marry me?”

  I kept my eyes closed and dropped my head. “No,” I whimpered.

  Time stood still. I closed my eyes tightly, and the next thing I knew, I was in my brother’s arms. I cried while we finished dancing to the next song.

  After the wedding, I went home to find Drew was gone.

  For two days, I stayed at the house before I went back to Chicago. I’d left Drew a letter on the bed in case he decided to come home.

  Drew,

  My decision to not marry you had nothing to do with how I feel about you or the amount of love I have for you. I love you with all my heart and soul. I have for a very long time.

  When we first stood in front of our home together, the first thing I imagined was me on the front steps with our baby in my arms, welcoming you home after a long day at work. I started crying at that moment…because I was one step closer to that dream with the man I love.

  I want more than anything to make that dream a reality—with you and only you. But, Drew, I don’t see myself getting married. I have a tragic fear that you will one day walk away and leave. That fear still lives inside of me and haunts my dreams at night. It would not only devastate me, but it would kill me if you ever asked for your last name back. So, please understand my reasons for saying no.

  I understand if you think my reasons are childish, and in a way, I agree with you, but I need to protect my heart. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to give anyone my whole heart in their hands to hold. It’s fragile and has been for a long time.

  After the wedding, I came home, and you were gone. I stayed for a few days, but I have to head back to Chicago now. I was hoping to see you before I left, so I could look you in the eyes and tell you all this stuff myself.

  I understand if you want me to move out. I hope that it doesn’t come to that I love this house. I love the warmth of it. I love the memories that we could share in it for the next twenty-five years, but most importantly, I love this house because it feels like home.

  I love you, Drew Parker.

  All my love,

  Kirsten

  xoxo

  Four weeks had passed since the wedding, and I’d only heard from Drew once. He’d said that he would not put my stuff into storage, but he would need time to think about what he wanted to do next. I had enough respect to listen to Drew and not come home until he asked. I had enough love for him that if he chose to walk away, I would let him go with no hard feelings.

  Oh god, I feel awful. My head was pounding, my nose was all stuffed up, my eyes were watering, and my throat was raw. “Great! Nothing like being sick on a well-deserved vacation,” I said to my carry-on bag while I traveled up the escalator to the departing gate.

  Liz saw me first. She came running over and stopped immediately when she saw me. “Kirsten! You look like shit.”

  I gave her a weak smile. “I feel like shit. All I want to do is sleep.”

  “You can rest on my shoulder on the plane.”

  Both Liz and I looked at each other, wide-eyed, before I slowly turned around to face Drew.

  “I didn’t think you’d come,” I whispered.

  “I didn’t think so either…until my dad, your dad, and Mic got a hold of me.” He snickered softly.

  “Drew—”

  He put his hands in his pockets. “Stop, please. I finally realized what I’d done was wrong. I pushed something on you that I shouldn’t have. Everyone had warned me that I was moving way too fast, but all I could think about was having you as my wife. Honestly, Kirsten, if I hadn’t fucked-up last spring, you would already be my wife.”

  “This has nothing to do with—”

  “I know it doesn’t. After reading your letter 700 times, I think I finally get it.” Drew stepped one foot closer and closed the gap between us.

  “I’d rather have you love me the way you do than you not love me at all. So, what do you say, Kirsten? Will you be my steady live-in girlfriend?”

  “Why do you have to label everything?”

  “Kirsten…”

  I grumbled. “All right, fine. I’ll be your live-in girlfriend.”

  “Was that so hard?” He laughed as he ran his fingers through my hair. “You look like hell.”

  “Good. It was the look that I was going for,” I said sarcastically.

  He stepped a little closer to kiss me, but a surprise sneeze landed on his T-shirt instead. “Nice, hon.”

  I wiped my nose on my sleeve. “Sorry.”

  “Come on, you guys. The plane is boarding!” yelled Liz.

  I grabbed Drew’s hand, and we went to board the plane.

  “Here, sweetheart. Let me grab your bag from you and place it in the overhead bin.”

  “Actually, Drew, I’d rather have it with me. I’d hate to keep bothering you with getting up all the time to fetch my water, medication, and my napping pillow.”

  Drew struck my nose with the tip of his finger. “Sweetheart, if you want to keep your bag with you, that’s fine, but I really don’t mind getting you things that you need or want.”

  I slid into our row of seats and looked at everyone behind me. “Hey, guys!”

  Everyone shouted back. “Hi, Kirsten.”

  “Who’s all here?” I asked, looking around.

  Liz and Brad were sitting beside us, and Caroline and Meg were behind us.

  “Derek couldn’t make it?” I asked Drew.

  “Um…” he murmured.

  I looked up at his face. “Drew, why do you have a yellowish tinge under your left eye?”

  “Let’s say that Derek and I finally came to an understanding.”

  I touched his face. “Do I want to know what it is?”

  He took my hand and kissed my palm. “It’s nothing for you to worry about. Everything is all good. Your brother and I are still friends. He had to play, he’s on a five-day road trip. He couldn’t make it even if he wanted to.”

  “Okay,” I said. I was too tired to care anymore.

  As the plane started to take off, I could feel the pressure building up in my ears, and it began to hurt. I tried plugging my ears with my fingers, but that didn’t work, so I went into my bag and grabbed some more cold medication.

  “Baby, you feeling okay?” asked Drew as he passed me a bottle of water.

  When I looked at him, I knew there were tears in my eyes. “My ears are killing me with the pressure in the cabin. My fever is starting to come back, and really, all I want to do is cry.”

  Drew pulled me toward him. He lifted my legs, so they were angled, lying across my seat. “Lie on my chest and close your eyes. Have a nap, my love. By the time we land, you’ll feel much better.”

  He pulled out my ponytail and ran his fingers through my hair until I fell asleep on his chest.

  I could feel kisses on the side of my face.

  “Sweetheart…”

  I twitched my nose as something touched it.

  “Time to wake up.”

  I slowly started to open my eyes. “Drew, is
that you?”

  “Yeah, baby, it is.” He kissed the top of my head one more time.

  “Did you come to take me home? I just wanna go home. I miss being home. Please come home, Drew. I miss you.” I closed my eyes wanting to go back to my dream.

  “Holy crap, she is out cold.” Brad chuckled.

  “How much medication did she take?” Liz asked, concerned.

  “I don’t know. She said her ears were really hurting.”

  “We need to get her off the plane,” said Meg.

  “I could always carry her out.”

  “Let me try waking her up,” Liz said, pushing Drew out of the way. “Kirsten, it’s Liz. It’s time to wake up. We’re in Mexico—the land of freely pouring tequila and pool boys wearing tight man thongs,” baited Liz.

  I started to sit up in my seat as I rubbed my eyes. “Are we here already?”

  Everyone started laughing.

  “What’s so funny?” I asked.

  “Honey, lover boy here has been trying to wake you up since we landed.” Caroline snickered.

  “We’ve landed?” I looked around, confused.

  Drew unbuckled my seat belt and helped me get up. “The plane has been empty for five minutes now.”

  I looked up at Drew, “You’re here.”

  Walking through the airport, I let go of Drew’s hand.

  “What’s wrong, baby?” Drew asked.

  “Nothing. I need to pee and splash some cold water on my face.”

  “Want me to go with you?” he offered.

  Caroline and Meg were behind us. “We got it, handsome.”

  “Holy crap, Kirsten,” said Meg while washing her hands, “Why didn’t you tell us that you were this sick? We would have canceled your ticket.”

  “No, I’m okay. I just took too much cold medicine when I was on the plane. The cabin pressure really hurt my ears. Once I get some tequila in me, I’ll be fine.” I opened the stall door that was free and tried to shake off my illness.

  “You sure as hell don’t look fine,” Liz said over the stall door. “Damn it, Kirsten. You looked stressed at my wedding, but today—”

  I flushed the toilet. “Listen, girls, I know I look like hell. Believe me, I feel it, too. It’s just a nasty cold, nothing more.” I went over to the sink and turned on the water. Looking over at Liz, I said, “This will be your last vacation before the baby comes, and I’m not missing it for the world.” I could see the concern in their eyes. “All right, look, my boss, Marc, has been riding my ass. I have four huge projects that all need my undivided attention.”

  All three women gasped.

  “It’s not that bad. I have it under control.”

  “No, you don’t!” yelled Liz.

  “I do,” I said with a smile. “I didn’t bring any work with me at all. I didn’t even bring my iPad, so I won’t be tempted to look at my emails. All I plan to do for seven days is lie on the beach, drink margaritas, and get things settled with Drew.”

  “Looks like it was getting tense between you two at the airport before we boarded. Anything you want to talk about?” questioned Meg.

  “Nothing really happened. Drew apologized.” I shrugged,” Did you guys know that Derek and him got into a fistfight?”

  “Brad and I saw it. The morning after the wedding, Drew came over with his tail between his legs, but Derek wouldn’t let him through the front door. When Drew wouldn’t leave, Derek punched him in the face.”

  I gasped and covered my mouth. “He came back?”

  Liz gave me a tight lip smile. “He did.”

  “Where did he go? I waited two days for him to come home.”

  “He won’t say.” Liz replied.

  We walked out of the restroom and headed over to the luggage terminal.

  “Drew said that he’d rather live with the love that I can give him than nothing at all,” I told Liz.

  “And?” asked Liz.

  “And what, Liz?”

  “Shut it,” she growled.

  “Fine.” I let out an exaggerated breath. “He might have asked me to be his live-in girlfriend.”

  Liz screamed and started jumping all around me, knowing that it was a big thing for me to label something.

  “Why are you so excited?” Brad asked before picking Liz up and swinging her around.

  “Kirsten! Her and Drew are officially live-in boyfriend and girlfriend.”

  “We sure are,” Drew said from behind me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck.

  Rolling my eyes, I muttered, “This is stupid.”

  “Here is your room, Mr. and Mrs. Parker. Please go inside, and I’ll bring up your bags.”

  “Thank you, Gael, but this isn’t my wife. She is my beautiful girlfriend.”

  “I’m so sorry, sir. I just assumed with the love between the two of you that you were the honeymoon couple.”

  “No, my man, it’s not us. It’s the couple across the hall from us actually.”

  “Please accept my apologies.”

  Drew laughed. “No need, my friend. It’s her loss.”

  “Hey, I heard that.” I laughed from behind Drew.

  “You were supposed to, my love,” Drew said grabbing my hand walking us into our room.

  Gael walked farther into the room and pointed out a few things. “Bottled water, beer, and pop are in the fridge. A safe is located in the closet with directions on how to use it. It is fine to brush your teeth using the tap water. This resort has a top-of-the-range filtering system for your health and safety. Maid service will be in every day from ten to eleven. They will change out bedding and towels as well as replace the fresh flowers.” He leaned in toward Drew. “If you tip them a little more, they will make you a swan towel, put rose petals on the bed, and leave chocolate.”

  After I grabbed a fresh shower, I noticed Drew lying on the bed with his eyes closed. I walked up to him and asked quietly, “Drew, honey, are you sleeping?”

  “No, baby. I’m just resting my eyes. I haven’t been sleeping very well.”

  “Why don’t you sleep and I’ll go down to the buffet area and grab some dinner. If you’d like, I can bring you up a plate.”

  He sat up and pulled me onto his lap. “Where you go, I go.” Then, he kissed me.

  “Okay, but let’s get going because I’m really hungry.”

  “Your wish is my command.” He grabbed my hand, and we went to dinner.

  The walk to the buffet was beautiful. The flowers were vibrant, the birds were singing, the ocean waves were cashing. “It’s beautiful here, Drew.”

  “It is.”

  We walked inside and saw Caroline and Meg sitting at a table.

  “It’s about time you lovesick puppies joined us!” yelled Caroline from across the restaurant.

  “I see she has already hit up the tequila bar.” Drew grinned.

  “Yeah! You’d think you two were the honeymooners. At least Liz and Brad came and ate dinner before they ditched us,” yelled Meg.

  I leaned over to my cute boyfriend. “I’m feeling tired, and I’m ready to call it a night.”

  Drew stood and put some tip money on the table. “Good night, ladies. We’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Sweet dreams, y’all,” Caroline replied.

  Then, the girls went to grab another round from the bar.

  I put on my boy shorts and light cami before I crawled into bed.

  “It sure gonna feel nice to be in bed with you again,” Drew said while opening the sheets for me.

  “You could say that again,” I uttered into his chest, smelling him.

  “Are you smelling me, Kirsten?”

  “Maybe…I missed your smell.”

  I could feel his chest vibrating with laughter under my cheek.

  “Is it okay if I kiss you, sweetheart?”

  I hovered my body on top of his and kissed him, but it quickly turned into a wild and passionate kiss. My cami was tossed across the room, and I couldn’t get Drew’s boxers off fas
t enough.

  “Slow down, baby. Let’s just take it slow.”

  I bit down on his bottom lip. There was no way in fucking hell that I was going to take it slow. “I have a month of orgasms raging inside me.” At this particular moment, I felt like the fucking Energizer Bunny, thanks to the NyQuil that I’d taken earlier. That shit made me hyper. Right now, I could run a full marathon and not even be out of breath.

  Drew flipped us over, so he was on top of me. He started sucking on my nipples, getting me wetter and wetter.

  “Bite them harder.”

  As he was doing that, he began fingering me. I rode his fingers hard. I couldn’t get enough of it. Tipping my head back, I moaned out, “Oh god…Drew…”

  I was scraping his back and then grabbing his ass cheeks.

  “God, I love it when you do that, Kirsten.”

  His words only gave me more encouragement that I really didn’t need.

  “Stop, stop, stop,” I begged.

  He sat up and gave me a funny look while I got my breathing under control.

  “Go in my suitcase and grab my vibrator, the one with the two prongs.” God, I love the little clit-stimulator prong. Using that thing was like going from zero to fucking-wild-crazy in like two minutes.

  “You brought more than one?” he asked, getting up.

  “What? I didn’t know if you were coming or not. Get it? Coming or not,” I teased.

  “I got it. Ha-ha. Is this purple one new?” he asked, lifting the one in question out of my suitcase.

  “Yes! Now, get the fuck over here already.”

  As soon as I put the delicious stimulator on my clit, things picked up right where they had left off. “Oh god.”

  He laughed. “Uh, would you like me to join you? Or shall I just watch?”

  “Join me!” I yelled while rubbing and riding.