Katia's Promise

by Catherine Lanigan

  Jack whistled. “That’s a lot of toys!”

  “I’m not sure he has that many at the moment.”

  “He didn’t tell you the exact number?” Jack asked incredulously. “That’s imperative information. Can you imagine?” Jack swiped his face with his palm. “This guy must be loaded.”

  “He inherited most of the cars from his great-grandfather on down to his father. They’ve been in the family a long time,” she said, feeling comfortable dispensing the truth once again.

  “When’s the next meeting?”

  Katia instantly felt like one of those clowns at a county fair who got dunked into a pool of water with baseballs. Of course Jack would think she’d set up a second meeting. That was why she’d been calling Austin so much. Of course, Jack would also expect professionalism from her. “Next Monday morning,” she lied, promising herself to do her best to make it true.

  “Are you insane?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “This guy just announced his plans for this museum to half of the Midwest. Every broker we know will be calling him. You need to meet with him tomorrow.”

  “But my movers come tomorrow.”

  He waved away her concerns. “Have Tina see to the movers. Go home tonight, pack what you need and get back to Indian Lake. There’s not a moment to lose.” Jack rose from his chair, which was his way of ending a meeting.

  Katia took her phone from his desk and left. Jack was right. Austin’s business was crucial to her own career, but it was also a necessary part of the plan to save Carter and Associates. Katia had been successful in the first phase of her reorganization plans. She’d cut many of their operating costs, but she hadn’t had two seconds to enjoy even a droplet of victory.

  Katia knew she had to hustle if she was going to win Austin’s business. She just hadn’t thought she would have to move quite this fast.

  * * *

  IT WAS AFTER eleven, and Katia still hadn’t finished filling all the suitcases, tote bags, shopping bags and several boxes that she would drive to Indian Lake in the morning. She still had to tackle her closet. Though the moving truck was scheduled to arrive on Saturday morning with her furniture, she still needed her personal items, clothes, electronics and business files to tide her over until the weekend.

  Tina had promised to be at her apartment at seven in the morning, before the movers arrived at eight. Katia wanted to be on the road shortly after she got the movers situated. Though she’d promised Jack she would wrangle a meeting with Austin at some point the next day, that didn’t mean she had to be in Indian Lake at the crack of dawn.

  As Katia pulled out another armload of hanging clothes from her closet and dumped them on the bed, she wondered for the first time if there was wisdom in owning so many clothes.

  Fortunately, her new apartment had huge closets, which would house every last lace top and pencil skirt. However, she had to consider the cost of boxes and the extra space they’d take up in the moving van.

  Wandering to the back of the closet, Katia found plastic zipper cases that contained scarves, gloves and winter hats. She pulled them out and placed them with the other items she would take in her car. Returning to the closet, she looked up and noticed a wooden box she hadn’t seen in years. Decades.

  It was a box Austin had given her for her twelfth birthday. She hadn’t thought of it in ages, and suddenly here it was, as if appearing by fate.

  Or dumb luck.

  Katia went to the bed, sat down and opened the box. She gasped and felt her heart trip in her chest. Two white origami birds nearly sprang out of the box as if they’d been set free from a cage.

  “Austin...” She said his name with the kind of emotion and awe she had once felt. He’d made them for her the day after she’d skinned both knees learning to ride his old bike. She’d only been ten years old, and his racing bike had been too big for her. He’d been patient with her despite his apparent disdain for the job, which had been thrust on him by his father. Katia had fallen after wobbling along Maple Avenue for a block. Katia had not sobbed, but tears had streamed down her cheeks. It was the first time Austin had seen her cry.

  The next day, he’d given her the birds as a symbol of her bravery. She’d thought they were lovebirds.

  She found other treasures in the box. A tarnished silver locket he’d given her for Christmas the following year. She found movie-ticket stubs, a pin from the county fair and folded notes that he used to slip under her door announcing yet another tennis game that he expected her to play. She found a small notebook in which she’d tallied all their tennis scores. She’d marked how many times he beat her and how many times she’d come close to besting him. She found a key chain that had a little tennis racket...attached to a key.

  Katia’s hand froze as she held the key up to the light. Austin’s front door key.

  Was it possible that the key still fit? Surely, in all these years, he’d changed the locks.

  Or had he? Katia continued to look at the key. Austin was a man of routine. He didn’t like change. He clung to the past as if the future would set him on fire. The chances were strong that the key might still work.

  She wrapped her fingers around it possessively.

  Maybe not so dumb luck.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  AFTER HER ARRIVAL in Indian Lake, Katia continued to phone Austin at home, but now her calls simply went unanswered. She guessed Austin had caller ID and that both he and Daisy were ignoring her. By the next day, he’d have her on his blocked-caller list.

  There was no other strategy for her to take than the obvious one.

  Katia stood at Austin’s front door and pressed the bell. She heard the familiar, elegant Westminster chimes play. She’d thought they were lovely when she was a child, but now she found them pretentious.

  It was dinnertime, but Katia hoped Austin had not begun eating yet. She had to talk to him about the insurance for his museum. Jack was expecting a great deal from her, and there was no time like the present to get started.

  Katia had also chosen to show up now because Maddie Strong had told her that Austin spent his days at the plant and left his office at the same time as his employees, around six. It was now six-thirty, quite dark, and even from the front steps, she could smell something like roast beef and garlic wafting from inside the house.

  Katia had walked from Mrs. Beabots’s house so that Austin wouldn’t see her car pull up. If he’d seen her rental the other day, she didn’t want to give away her presence before she had a chance to talk to him. Even if he hadn’t seen the car, the Illinois license plate might give her away, especially since she’d told Daisy that she’d been living in Chicago. She knew Austin probably had that piece of information by now.

  Katia pressed the bell again, but still no one came to the door.

  As the chimes faded, Katia’s heart began hammering, and she felt short of breath. Her hands were shaking so she closed them into fists to mask her trembling. It wouldn’t be good for Austin to know he had the advantage. She was here to get him to talk to her, but every time she considered how to approach the situation, she changed her mind and altered her plan of attack. Her heart felt as if it had started moving up to her throat. She clamped her fist against her chest.

  The door swung open with such force, Katia thought she’d be swept inside. “Austin.”

  His blue eyes slid from her face to her balled fist over her heart. “Ah. Mea culpa. That’s a good start,” he said. His sarcasm felt sharp enough to slit her skin.

  Katia suddenly felt like the most infinitesimal being on earth. Her past—their past—came slamming back to her. She had wronged Austin and hurt him so deeply, so terribly, that he’d never gotten over it. That was clear to her now. How could she ever make that up to him? He had good reason to hate her.

  “What are you doing here?” he demanded.

  “You wouldn’t answer my calls.” She tried to put a cheery lilt in her voice but failed miserably. “I figured you were trying to ignore me.�
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  “Good assumption,” he ground out.

  This was going to be more difficult than she’d imagined. If she was even going to broach the insurance subject, she would have to convince him that she was truly sorry and try to regain his trust.

  But would he ever believe her?

  She looked at him, and as she spoke the words, she knew she’d never felt such remorse. “I’m sorry, Austin. I’m so, so sorry.”

  “For what? Your telephone harassment?”

  “For not going to your prom with you. For not telling you about our move to Chicago. For hurting you the way I did.”

  Austin rolled his eyes and gripped the door with white knuckles. “You think I’m mad at you?”

  “I can see that you are,” Katia countered, her voice growing louder.

  Daisy came up behind Austin and yanked the door out of his grasp. “You gonna dump your dirty laundry all over the street? Bring it inside. Now. The both of you!”

  Austin exhaled and took a step backward so she could enter the house. He wouldn’t meet her eyes and stared at the floor, seemingly lost in thought.

  Was he remembering that fateful day when she had left him standing at LaGuardia? She knew he’d waited for her there, but she hadn’t been on the plane. Now she was here, literally on his doorstep, trying to apologize. Her heart was still in her throat, and she found she was just as speechless as he was.

  “We’ll go to the living room,” Austin said, leading the way.

  Katia glanced at Daisy, who jerked her head toward Austin in a gesture of support. Katia twisted her hands, wishing they would stop shaking and that the room would stop tilting.

  “May I sit?” she asked feebly, wondering if this time it wasn’t just panic—although she was entitled to it—but an actual heart attack. It was probably just as well. Any other woman in her situation would already be dead.

  Austin gestured to one of the room’s two aqua bergère chairs, and Katia sat. No wonder her prized possessions were her own bergère chairs, she thought. They reminded her of home. Austin’s home, rather.

  “I didn’t think you’d even talk to me,” she said.

  “I’m not. Technically, Daisy let you in.” He stood next to the mantel under the huge oil portrait of his father. “So why not say what it is that you came here to say.”

  Katia’s eyes scanned the room. Oddly, the familiar surroundings gave her the sensation of comfort and calm. She was amazed at how quickly and clearly she remembered everything about her life in this home. Every stick of furniture was exactly the same as when she was a child. If that wasn’t enough to dredge up the memories she’d placed in the catacombs of her heart, there was her favorite smell of lemon oil on old wood and that particular spicy, musty fragrance that accompanied old furniture. Perhaps this was where Katia had acquired her love of antiques and all things that spoke of elegance and permanence.

  Her heart returned to its normal pace, and her hands were growing steadier by the moment. As she looked up at Austin, she felt her strength return. She wasn’t sure if it was adrenaline or just a large dose of indignation, but her panic was receding. “Let me get this straight,” she said. “You aren’t mad at me?”

  “That would imply I have an emotional investment in you,” Austin replied, his tone as cool as a glacier.

  “How long have you practiced that line?” she countered quickly. Then she saw the wounded look in his eyes. “I’m sorry...again.”

  “Forget it. You should just go.”

  “No! Austin. I, uh, came here to talk to you about...” Suddenly, she couldn’t remember the first aspect of her sales pitch. She was tongue-tied. “I wanted to talk to you about my business.”

  “Business?” he spat, as if the word were laden with battery acid.

  “I’m in the insurance business. That’s why I moved here.”

  “What kind of insurance?”

  “All kinds,” she said, not believing she could be messing up this badly. On her way over here, she’d only been thinking about saving her job, but now she realized that this meeting shouldn’t be about what she wanted from him. He needed a great deal from her, and it was obvious that he was only interested in talking about his feelings, both past and present, as well as her responsibility for them.

  Katia felt every ounce of shame that had weighed on her heart for the past twenty years.

  She remembered the way Austin used to look at her with clear, bright and trusting eyes. Now his expression was guarded and closed off, and his eyes held a melancholy that she realized she had put there.

  Her heart went out to him, but she wished he would be open-minded enough to see her point of view.

  She stood up and faced him, but the moment she was on her feet, she felt shaky and afraid again. “We left because my mother was terrified that I would get pregnant. As the maid’s daughter, my future would be ruined. I would never have finished high school and college. You and I were—”

  “In love.”

  “Yes,” she admitted, and then stopped abruptly, sinking back into her chair. Had he really said that out loud? Back then, he’d never come out and told her that he loved her. He’d told her that she was pretty, but so had her Sunday-school teachers and Mrs. McCreary’s friends. He’d said he liked her. That she was a good tennis partner. But had Austin truly loved her? Was that the source of this antagonism? She knew she’d hurt him; she’d chalked a lot of it up to his pride. The McCreary name and reputation.

  “We were,” he said, his eyes softening. She’d seen that look before. It was the one he’d given her when he’d first begun to see her as more than his pesky shadow. The look was filled with appreciation and approval. Respect and endearment. But was it love?

  “I couldn’t call you, Austin. I was too embarrassed. I felt terrible about what happened and very ashamed. My emotions were all over the place. I felt it was all my fault that we had to leave our home and my mother had to quit her job. I remember walking around my new school with my head hanging down. I was so guilt ridden, I couldn’t make eye contact with anyone. My mother was so paranoid about us, about what she thought we would do, that I wanted to assure her she didn’t have to worry. If I’d called you, we would have been on the phone constantly and that would have caused my mother even more grief. We might even have tried to meet up in secret. At the time, I saw no other way out.”

  “I’m trying to understand,” he said, moving away from the mantel to sit in the chair next to hers.

  There was a dark cabriole leg table between the two of them. Just enough distance to keep them from colliding.

  He continued. “As I remember, your mother lurked around every corner. I’m not so sure anything could have happened. At least not in this house.”

  “It nearly did at Indian Lake,” she reminded him.

  “Summer was just coming in,” he said, looking down at his hands.

  “Sunday. It was a Sunday,” she said, the afternoon coming back to her in vivid detail. They’d gone to the beach, lying to their mothers that they were strawberry picking. They’d bought strawberries at a farmhouse on the county road, packed neatly in wooden pint baskets to keep the illusion intact. Katia had forgotten about their eagerness and Austin’s kisses.

  They’d talked about the future. He’d revealed his dreams, which had little to do with the successful McCreary automotive-parts plant he was destined to run. Austin had hoped to try out for the national tennis championships. His mother had laughed at him and claimed his ideas were ridiculous. She’d scolded him for pursuing “pointless” hobbies. Austin had made matters worse by telling his mother he wanted to work on cars and perfect his mechanic skills instead of attending business college. Hanna had flown into a rage and threatened to disinherit Austin if he turned his back on the family business for his childish pursuits.

  “Did you ever think about me, Katia?” Austin asked with trepidation.

  Leveling her green eyes on his, she felt the lump in her throat threaten to choke her. Suddenly, she w
as sixteen again and more in love than she’d thought possible, then or since. Had her feelings for Austin been deep and real? Or had they been only a side effect of growing up, as her mother had constantly told her?

  Katia was more confused than ever. Though contrite, she didn’t want Austin to think she’d come here just to cleanse her soul, or that she’d been pining away for him since they were teenagers. She’d built a new life filled with friends and success and triumphs. Hadn’t she? But if all those things were true, why did she care so much about how he’d react to what she said?

  Katia chose to tell him the truth. “I couldn’t get you out of my mind. I wanted to call you, Austin. But like I said, it wasn’t easy for me. When we first left, we stayed with a cousin. My mother and I were in a tiny room sharing a double bed. We were counting every penny, and she would have known if I made a long-distance call. I wrote letters to you, but I didn’t mail them. Frankly, I was afraid to contact you.”

  “But why?”

  “In the beginning, I was hurt and ashamed. It was awful for me not to be with you. Then as time went on, I realized that if I had come back, I would have ended up resenting you because I did want a new life for myself. I wanted a real career and my own apartment. I wanted to know what it was like to live on my own and make my own decisions. If I’d stayed here, I would have been your girl. And that’s all.” Katia was almost in tears. She’d thought the guilt she carried couldn’t get any worse. She was wrong. Reliving the past with Austin sitting right next to her was agonizing.

  “I guess that says it all,” he said. “Being with me wasn’t enough.”

  Katia blinked. A slow burn of anger started low in her belly, but it didn’t stay there long. It threatened to engulf her entire body.

  “Of all the arrogant—” She shot to her feet and loomed over him with both hands on her hips. “Are you kidding me? Are you actually going to tell me that you expected me to sit here in Indian Lake and wait for you, as if you were a...a soldier off at war? As though you were doing something heroic?” She threw her head back and laughed. “You’ve really lost it, Austin, if you think a woman with any brains or talent is going to make some guy the center of her universe. It doesn’t work that way. Couples are supposed to be partners.”