Shadow Watcher, A Romantic Suspense Novel

by Carolyn Mahony

  ‘I thought you already knew!’

  He grinned. ‘I haven’t been stalking you, if that’s what you’re thinking.’

  She was ashamed to admit the thought had crossed her mind when all the stuff with Keith was going on – even if it was briefly.

  ‘Initially I wanted to keep tabs on you because I knew I’d let you down over the Rory business,’ he said, ‘and I thought if you needed help again, I’d be there for you. But of course the reality was, it wasn’t like that. I’d have had to spend my whole time watching you to keep track of what was going on and that would have made me no better than him.’

  She smiled back at him, her eyes half on the bar. ‘I believe you.’

  ‘Good. So how about we get the worst over with first. How are things with him?’

  Grace hesitated. He had her full attention now. ‘God, I’m sorry. I forgot you didn’t know. He’s dead.’

  She explained the circumstances briefly – leaving out all that had gone on since with Keith – and at the end of it said firmly, ‘But we’re not going to talk about him. That chapter of my life is closed. How about you? What have you been up to, apart from becoming a successful Orthopaedic surgeon?’

  ‘Oh, you know what it’s like. The job’s busy and I’m slowly getting to grips with it but there’s still a lot to be done. It hasn’t left much time for socialising. Talking of which …’

  He looked at her directly. ‘You said you were going to contact me when you’d sorted a few things out. The fact you’ve rung me now – does that mean those things are sorted and you’re free to meet up now, or are things still tricky?’

  The words were casually spoken but there was an intensity to his gaze that left her in no doubt where this conversation was heading. And it wasn’t a conversation she was ready to have.

  She hesitated, her eyes automatically slanting back to the bar. They did an alarmed re-take. He was gone.

  ‘Hello, Grace.’

  She swung round, totally unprepared for the sight of him at her side. She hadn’t seen him since that last meeting a week ago and just looking at him made her realise how much she’d missed him.

  ‘Hello again,’ he was saying to Stuart. ‘I think we met at Grace’s house? Nick Brandon.’

  Stuart half rose from the table and the two men shook hands. ‘Yes, I remember.’ He smiled. ‘Grace and I are just catching up – seven years’ worth of reminiscences.’

  Oh great, now Nick would put two and two together and work out who Stuart was.

  ‘Really?’ Nick’s eyes flicked to Grace’s briefly, before switching back to the other man. ‘Well, good to see you again. Don’t let me interrupt. Enjoy your meal.’

  ‘Seems a nice chap,’ Stuart said, looking at her closely as he walked off. ‘Now where were we?’

  ‘Not sure I remember.’

  ‘I do – I was basically asking if you were footloose and fancy free. Is there anyone special in your life at the moment?’

  ‘No, not particularly. You?’

  ‘No – I told you, no-one’s come up to scratch since you.’

  ‘I can’t believe that.’

  ‘It’s true. If you knew how many times I’ve regretted letting you go–’

  ‘We let each other go, Stuart – and it was right that we did. It would never have worked. You needed to sort your career out and I wasn’t in a fit state to be with anyone.’

  ‘And now?’

  She smiled ruefully. ‘I don’t seem to be any better at it now than I was back then.’

  ‘So there is someone?’

  ‘Sort of, but it’s over now.’

  ‘Let me guess. That guy we just saw – Nick?’

  Grace hesitated. ‘Yes.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘So am I. I don’t want to mislead you. I think it’s true what I said about us breaking up for a reason. I was … am … very fond of you …’

  ‘But you don’t love me.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘You love the other guy?’

  There was a long silence.

  ‘Right.’ He grimaced and took a breath. ‘I won’t deny that’s not what I was hoping to hear, but I’ve got over it once, I daresay I can do it again. Are things really over between the two of you?’

  ‘Yes. And I’d really rather not talk about it, if you don’t mind?’

  ‘Of course. But if that’s the case, I hope we can still meet up as friends?’

  ‘I’d like that.’

  It was amazing how quickly they slipped into familiar ways, going down familiar paths, and it seemed no time at all before Stuart was looking at his watch and saying. ‘Didn’t you say Ellie was being dropped back by her friend at ten?’

  ‘Yes. I should make a move. Thanks for tonight – I’ve really enjoyed it.’

  ‘Me too. We’ll do it again soon. I’ll call you.’

  CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

  ‘Wow … you look great, Mum. New dress?’

  ‘Yes. Does it look alright? Not too over the top?’

  ‘Nooo, it looks fab. I love the sparkly bits around the neck.’

  Grace viewed the black dress doubtfully in the mirror. She’d bought it on a whim after her conversation with Lynette, but she still hadn’t made up her mind if she was going to wear it for Evelyn’s lunch party. Was she seriously thinking Nick was going to take one look at her in it and declare undying love?

  ‘Will’s downstairs by the way,’ Ellie said, ‘and Sophie and her dad will be here any minute to pick us up. Will said Nick’ll bring us back when the film’s finished.’

  After she’d changed back into her jeans and waved them off, Grace wandered into the lounge with the prospect of a long Saturday afternoon stretching ahead of her. Not that she wasn’t used to that. The trouble was that when she was alone these days she got to thinking about Nick – and when she thought about him that invariably led to her plaguing herself as to whether she really had made the right decision ending things.

  As she stared out of the window, the doubts wouldn’t be silenced, nor would the knowledge that the question was irrelevant now anyway.

  She turned back into the room and on impulse poured herself a Bailey’s. Solitary drinking in the afternoon – not to be encouraged – but she’d indulge herself today. She added several cubes of ice and savoured the warmth of the first sip as it slid down her throat. Taking another swig from her glass, she curled up on the sofa and pondered the bleakness of her future. How she was going to manage living so close to him? Seeing him regularly – sometimes with other women?

  It hit her with the force of a sledgehammer that he fit in a way Stuart never had – in a way she’d be incredibly lucky to find again. And she’d chucked it away. Would it really have been so disastrous to put herself first for once?

  As usual when she dwelt on this stuff she came to no useful conclusion, but two glasses of Bailey’s helped her feel less bothered by it all. She’d cope. She was good at that.

  The sound of the doorbell broke into her thoughts and she frowned, resenting the intrusion. But when it rang for a third time, she found herself rising to answer it.

  He stood there on the doorstep in jeans and a black tee-shirt, his face serious.

  ‘Nick!’

  ‘We need to talk.’

  He brushed past her into the hall before she could say anything, and she closed the door slowly behind him, giving herself time to catch her thoughts. They looked at each other for a moment and she was so afraid of what he might see in her gaze that she lowered it under pretext of rubbing an imaginary spot on her arm.

  ‘What about?’

  ‘Us.’

  Her heart gave a hopeless little leap, but she crushed it. ‘I think it’s all been said, don’t you?’

  ‘Maybe not the most important thing.’

  ‘Which is?’

  There was the briefest of pauses. ‘That I love you. And I think you love me.’

  Her eyes shot back to his, the wind punched from her sails. But she
wasn’t ready to lay her feelings bare – reopen wounds that had barely begun to heal.

  ‘Right. And you think that because?’

  ‘Just call it a hunch from someone who’s been there before – but if you tell me I’m wrong, then I’ll take myself out of here and that will be the end of it.’ He hesitated. ‘I’ve missed you, Grace.’

  Her eyes glistened. She had no weapon against this. ‘I’ve missed you too,’

  In a trice he’d closed the gap between them. ‘Then what the hell are we doing?’ he muttered, hauling her into his arms and giving her a long, hard kiss.

  ‘This isn’t fair,’ she whispered, when she got a moment to say anything.

  ‘Life isn’t fair, get used to it. And you’ve been drinking.’ There was amusement in his voice as he drew back to look at her. ‘I can taste it in your mouth.’

  She shook her head in confusion. ‘Nick, I don’t want to start this all over again …’

  He caught her hands and held them tightly to his chest. ‘Let me have my say, then if you want me to, I promise I’ll leave and not bother you again.’

  He started to play with her fingers, his thumbs softly stroking her palms. ‘When I saw you with that guy the other night, it made me realise how I felt – jealous as hell.’

  He stared at her, and she could see the absolute certainty in his eyes. ‘I love you and I want to be with you. I was stupid not realising it before. I think I’d got so used to putting Rosie up as a barrier in all my relationships that I just didn’t see it, and then when I began to suspect what was happening, it felt like a betrayal.’

  ‘And it doesn’t feel like that any more?’

  ‘No. She’d want this for me just like I’d want it for her.’

  He could see the complete shock in her face and added on a less sure note, ‘I’m probably not saying this very well – and maybe I’ve got it all in a twist and you don’t feel the same?’

  How could men be so stupid? And why was she starting to cry like some sort of idiot?

  ‘Oh, Nick. Of course I love you. Breaking up with you was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. If you knew how much I’ve missed you.’

  ‘You were right to take the stance you did. I knew that at the time even if I didn’t admit it. Your principles are part of why I love you so much. Ellie’s lucky to have you as her mother, and my son will be equally lucky to have you as his stepmother – if you decide you’re prepared to take us on?’

  He grinned, a slow, incredulous grin. ‘I hadn’t planned that bit, but it sounded incredibly like a proposal to me. What’s your answer?’

  She stared at him, stunned. ‘Are you sure that’s what you want?’

  ‘Never been surer.’

  ‘Then it’s a definite yes,’ she said, without a moment’s hesitation, moving back into his embrace.

  ‘Thank God for that.’

  She relished every moment of his kiss, feeling that finally – after what seemed like a very long journey – she’d come home.

  ‘We’ll go and meet the kids together later, shall we? Tell them the good news,’ he murmured in her ear.

  She didn’t want to go anywhere. She just wanted to stay here, wrapped in his arms forever.

  ‘You realise they’ll probably take all the credit for this themselves?’ she said, smiling up at him.

  ‘And rightly so. If they hadn’t organised that birthday dinner for you, who knows what might or might not have happened?’

  He looked at his watch. ‘We’ve got about half an hour before we need to leave …’

  ‘Just time for a quick cup of tea then,’ Grace teased.

  ‘That wasn’t exactly what I had in mind …’

  He drew her back into his arms, and as his lips settled on hers, she knew a moment’s flutter of panic at the realisation of how much this man held the power of her happiness in his hands.

  But it was the briefest of panics, acknowledged and discarded in the same breath as she returned his embrace with every fibre of her being.

  They were strong hands. They wouldn’t let her down.

  THE END

  YOU’VE FINISHED! Before you go …

  This book was a slight deviation from my normal genre of psychological crime but I always have loved a bit of romance and thoroughly enjoyed writing this one! I hope you enjoyed reading it, and if you did, I’d love it if you’d pop over to Amazon and leave a Review. Reviews are so helpful to authors.

  If you’d like to take a sneak preview of the first book in my crime series, Cry From The Grave, just flip to the next page for a little teaser.

  The 2nd book in the series is called The Jagged Line and you can find it on Amazon here: http://amzn.to/2uU2Ddq for UK, or here: http://amzn.to/2w4Jh3Z for US. It’s a stand-alone story, but continues on with DS Harry Briscombe and Co., as the police investigation team.

  If you’d like to contact me about any of my books, I’d love to hear from you on any of the contact details below. In the meantime, Happy Reading!

  http://www.twitter.com/carolynmahony

  http: www.facebook.com/carolyn.mahony.3

  Email: carolyn@carolynmahony.com

  Website: www.carolynmahony.com

  CRY FROM THE GRAVE

  PROLOGUE

  The bright sunlight glistening through the leafy avenue gave promise of a beautiful day, but even though the warmth brushed her skin, Hannah Walker shivered as she walked up the path to her front door. She remembered the first time she’d walked up this path with Ben, full of excitement at the prospect of moving in with him. Was it really only seven months ago?

  She opened the front door and pushed the pram over the threshold, her eyes skimming the pristine, luxuriously furnished flat conversion. It did nothing for her now; but then why should it? She’d had no input into the décor. Ben had chosen it all. Her glance fell on the telephone sitting on the hall table. One phone call - that was all it would take…

  Hardly aware of what she was doing, she started to walk towards it.

  ‘Is that you Hannah?’

  She stopped in her tracks.

  ‘Leave her out in the garden, the fresh air will do her good,’ Ben said, coming into the hall and eyeing her steadily. ‘Then you and I can make-up before I leave for my appointment.’

  Was he serious? Hannah lifted her hand unconsciously to where clever makeup hid the bruise on her cheek – but she wasn’t about to antagonise him further.

  ‘It’s okay,’ she said, avoiding his gaze as she parked the pram in the hallway. ‘She’s due a feed soon.’

  ‘I said put her outside - she’ll be fine in the back. You and I need to talk and I don’t want her interrupting things.’

  He was testing her, showing her who was boss, and after their argument earlier she knew better than to aggravate him further. She despised herself as she backed wordlessly out of the flat and did as he said.

  You’re a coward, Hannah Walker, why don’t you stand up to him?

  She parked the pram beneath the apple tree and leaned in to kiss Sophie on the cheek, breathing in the soft warmth of peachy skin, the familiar sweet baby scent that never failed to soothe her.

  ‘You have a nice little snooze out here,’ she murmured, smiling at the droopy blue eyes, battling to stay open. ‘Mummy will come and get you very soon.’

  She retraced her steps slowly. She didn’t want to make up. He’d gone too far this time.

  Inside the flat Ben was standing by the lounge window staring at Sophie through the glass. He turned as Hannah came in and walked towards her. Without saying a word, he lifted his hand to her cheek and traced the bruise lightly with his thumb. ‘I’m sorry for this, babe,’ he said finally, his expressive blue eyes contrite. ‘I didn’t mean to hurt you. But I’ve got a lot on my plate at the moment and you did push me.’

  She kept her own face expressionless as she tried to ease out of his hold, but his hands dropped to her shoulders, drawing her resisting body tighter into his arms. ‘Let’s go and make up,’ he
whispered, nuzzling her neck. ‘It’s all this lack of sex, it’s getting to me.’

  He began to edge her clumsily into the hall. She could feel his arousal and shrank from it.

  ‘The doctor said I should give things time to heal,’ she said quickly, ‘I don't feel ready yet.'

  ‘You’ll be fine. Come on, I'll be careful.’

  His grip tightened as he backed her into the bedroom and her panic rose.

  ‘No, Ben, I don’t want to.’

  She managed to shove him off, something snapping as she faced him. ‘I can’t just forget what you did, even if you can. There was no excuse for it.’

  ‘So, what…?’ His expression was ugly. ‘You’re going to punish me now by withholding sex? Is that what this is all about Hannah? Well, like hell you will …’

  Afterwards, she kept her eyes closed, imagining herself a million miles away. She wouldn’t look at him. Wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he’d hurt her.

  ‘You’re about as responsive as a bloody marble statue,’ he grumbled, throwing off the bed sheets and getting up. ‘I’d get more enjoyment from a blow-up doll.’

  She didn’t answer.

  ‘Don’t ignore me, Hannah.’

  She opened her eyes. ‘It hurts me,’ she said coldly. ‘You know what the doctor said …’

  ‘Oh, spare me all that six weeks bullshit. Dave and Laura were back in business after a fortnight. You just don’t want me touching you. Admit it. Well don’t blame me if I do what your father did and start looking around!’

  He picked up his clothes and stalked off to the bathroom, leaving Hannah staring bleakly after him.

  After a while, she rose and went into the lounge to check on Sophie through the window. She looked so peaceful and innocent sleeping there in her pram. It soothed Hannah’s heart just looking at her.

  She moved back into the bedroom and sat on the bed, waiting for Ben to finish in the shower. Across the room the mirror on the dresser wasn’t kind to her. She stared hard at her reflection, comparing it to the smiling photo on the wall. She looked a mess. Her blond hair hung lankly around her shoulders and she had huge dark circles under her eyes. The slim figure she’d always taken for granted had been replaced by lumps and bumps that still hadn’t diminished since giving birth. No wonder Ben had gone off her.