by L A Cotton
“Nice house, by the way. Westgate is probably the nicest neighborhood in Credence.”
“Where do you live?” I deflected her comment, hoping she wouldn’t say any of the areas Dad had warned me to avoid.
“Credence Woods, the best damn trailer park in the whole of our shitty town.”
“You live in a …”
“Trailer park?” She laughed. “Yeah, so? A lot of the kids at Credence do. There are a couple near the school.”
“Oh.” I’d never met anyone that lived in a trailer park before.
“I take it they don’t have trailer parks where you come from?”
“Hmm, I don’t think so.”
Not unless you were camping on vacation, they didn’t.
“Where are you from again?”
I pulled the hem of my t-shirt. “Oh, hmm, a little place in Santa Barbara.”
“Sounds … fancy,” she replied with a hint of sarcasm that made me internally wince.
“Not really. Just your average coastal town, I guess.” It came out barely a whisper.
“Right. Well, Credence Woods isn’t as bad as it sounds. We have running water, and we even have those things called toilets.” Her voice was light but still had an edge of something that made me feel like a complete bitch for the way I’d reacted.
“Cool. Maybe one day I can come visit?”
“Oh, Mom would love that. She’s always bugging me to bring friends home so she can bake cookies and talk boys. Like I want to do that.”
I stifled a laugh. “Are we picking up Lilly?”
“Nah, she’ll meet us there. I’m digging those bracelets, by the way.” She flicked her head to my wrist. “Where’d you get them?”
“Hmm, a store in town.”
“Treasures?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“Oh man, I love that place. Next time you go, call me, and we can go together.”
“Okay.” I sank back against the seat, unable to hide the smile on my face. Sometimes, I wasn’t sure about Scarlett and her straight-talking ways, but she’d included me. And that was all that mattered.
“You didn’t tell anyone where we’re going, right?”
“No. I said we were hanging at your house.”
Scarlett slid her glasses down her nose and turned to me. “Awesome. Stick close when we get there, yeah?”
I was beginning to wonder what kind of place Rogues was if it had all these rules. Scarlett and Lilly seemed like good people; I didn’t think they’d be involved with anything dangerous or even illegal, but it all seemed so mysterious.
It wasn’t dark out yet, but the sunset on the horizon was painting the sky flamingo pink.
“I don’t think I’ve been this way yet.” Nothing looked familiar, but we were only fifteen minutes from my house, so we had to be in Credence still.
“There’s not much out here.” Scarlett leaned over and fumbled with the radio. It crackled and then some pop rock song blasted through the speakers. She grinned. “I fucking love Royal Tailor.”
Scarlett’s voice filled the car, and I laughed at her sudden outburst. Most of the time, she was guarded. I liked this side of her, and although the song wasn’t familiar to me, I hummed along until something caught my eye on the horizon. I leaned forward to get a better look. Was that … no …
“Pretty cool, huh?”
“Please tell me that’s not where we’re going?” The fairground grew closer, but it wasn’t a regular fairground. There were no bright lights and excited crowds … no, this was deserted. Abandoned. My head craned up against the window, taking in the rusted Ferris Wheel filling the skyline, as Scarlett drove alongside the fenced-off park.
“It’s been abandoned for years. I think the last time I came here was when I was like five. The owner, old man Callen Rogue, died, and the place closed. Over the years, developers tried to buy the plot, but it’s protected land, so it’s never happened. Not yet, anyway.”
“And what, you guys come and hang out here? In an abandoned fairground? That’s kind of …”
“Creepy. Hell yeah, it is.” Scarlett had driven around the perimeter of the park and stopped in a dirt clearing cloaked on three sides by trees. “This is the original parking lot, but it’s overgrown. No one comes out here much.”
She was right; it seemed to be one road in and out. Dense woods stood behind the park, years of overgrowth spilling out onto the deserted parking lot where Scarlett had parked.
“Ready?” Scarlett unbuckled her belt and leaned between the seats to grab her backpack off the backseat.
“Hmm, I don’t know, Scarlett. What exactly do you guys do in there?”
Her lips tugged up in an amused smirk, and she shook her head gently. “Stop worrying. It’s just where we come and hang out. The really crazy stuff only happens on the weekends.” Her eyebrow cocked up, and I couldn’t tell if she was telling me the truth or playing me.
Did I want to go in there? To an abandoned fairground where kids were doing God only knows what?
“You’re not in Santa Barbara now, sista.” Scarlett climbed out of the car, giving me no choice but to follow.
We found Lilly and the others hanging out in the decommissioned bumper cars. They had been arranged to make a seating area while the guys goofed around to the side. I recognized Malachi and Jay but not the other guy.
“Took you long enough.” Lilly waved us over and patted the ‘seat’ beside her. I climbed into the car and leaned against the back, mirroring Lilly’s position.
“Love your hat, Becca.” Her smile seemed genuine enough, so I returned it with one of my own. “Thanks.” The charcoal knitted beanie had been another thrift shop purchase, much to Mom’s disapproval. She’d insisted on washing it twice—just for good measure.
Scarlett threw her bag into the empty car but sat on the front instead of climbing inside. “I had to get gas before I picked up Becca.”
“Who’s around?”
The guys came over, and Jay said, “Might want to avoid the arcade.”
“Ugh. She came? She hasn’t been out here all summer.” Scarlett’s lips pressed into a flat line. “Let them have it. There’s plenty of room for all of us. Anyone got a smoke?”
Part of me wanted to ask who they were talking about, but something told me I wouldn’t like the answer. Malachi slid his hand into his pocket and held a joint—at least, I assumed it was a joint. I’d never actually gotten high before, but a couple of my friends back in Montecito had tried it. “You owe me.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Scarlett took it and pressed it between her lips. Lilly gave her a light, and she inhaled deeply, holding her breath until rings of smoke floated out of her mouth. “Niiiice. Lil?”
Lilly held up her hand. “Not tonight.”
Scarlett shrugged. “Suit yourself. M?”
Malachi took the joint and repeated the process. So did Jay and the other guy I hadn’t yet been introduced to. I was so busy watching them that I almost missed Scarlett holding it out toward me. “New girl?”
“Hmm, no, no thanks.” I dipped my head, feeling heat wash over my cheeks.
Scarlett chuckled to herself before taking another hit, and everyone chatted amongst themselves. I was happy to listen, to just be there taking it all in. From our position at the bumper cars, I could see the Ferris Wheel looming over the park. Off to the left were a couple of smaller rides. They looked like something straight out of a horror film with their faded paint and one-eyed animal cars. A shiver zipped up my spine. Except for us, the place was like a ghost town, and I could only imagine how eerie it was when darkness finally fell. The thought had me yanking my zipper higher.
“So what do you think, Becca?” Jay leaned one foot up against the kiosk to the side of the cars. “Nice little thing we got going here, right?”
“Hmm, yeah. I guess.”
“Dude, she’s from Santa Barbara. They don’t even have trailer parks.”
“For real?” Lilly gasped.
“I, hmm—” I threw Scarlett a pleading glance.
“Why’d you move anyway?” She winked, obviously thinking she was doing me a favor, but she couldn’t have asked a worse question.
“Dad lost his job.” It just rolled off my tongue. No thought. No consideration for the questions that might follow.
“Man, that’s rough. But why Credence? It’s not exactly the land of the rich and free,” Jay said.
Relief washed over me. This, I could answer. “He has an old friend here who got him work. So here we are.”
“But you left your school? Your friends? Surely, there was work in—”
“Fuck’s sake, Lil, give the girl a break. Look at her. She looks ready to pee her pants.”
If I wasn’t red before, my cheeks were the color of beets now.
“I need another smoke. Malachi, you in?”
“I don’t have any more.”
Scarlett shrugged her shoulders and flicked her head over toward a small building in the corner of the park. Its boarded-up windows made it impossible to see inside.
“Are you sure? You know he doesn’t usually like peop—”
“It’ll be fine. He owes me.” Her gaze landed on me. “You, stay here. Don’t wander; don’t move. Lilly, watch her.”
“Sure. It’s not like we’re going anywhere.”
I nodded. It was all I could do as I suddenly felt like the little sister who no one wanted around. My eyes followed Scarlett and Malachi as they walked lazily across the park and entered the building. It was almost dark now, but someone had rigged up a small generator to power the original lights running around the interior of the track.
“Who did all of this?” I asked; my question not directed at anyone in particular.
“Seniors started coming out here a few years back. Everyone knows we come out here, but as long as there’s no trouble, they leave us alone,” Jay answered.
“But Scarlett said I couldn’t tell anyone.”
He shrugged, pushing off the wall, and dropped onto one of the empty cars, stretching his legs out in front of him. “It’s one of those situations where everyone knows what goes on out here, but no one talks about it. Kind of like what they don’t know won’t hurt them.”
“Okay.” I didn’t get it—not really. It was just another thing that was different in Credence.
Jay stared at Lilly in that way guys did when they wanted something, and she giggled and left my side to go to him. Wrapping her in his arms, they started making out. The other guy gagged, shooting me an amused grin. “Since none of these fuckers introduced me, I’m Vin.”
“Becca.”
“I know. You’re hot news in CH.”
I was?
“Vin,” Lilly warned, breaking away from Jay. She shot me an apologetic smile and added, “Don’t freak her out. He just means it’s not often we get a transfer, that’s all.”
That made sense, I guess.
“Especially someone like you.” Kendall appeared out of nowhere. Pressing one foot against the track barrier, she crossed her arms over her chest. Her eyes locked on mine, and I wanted to look away, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. Her unexplained hatred for me pinned me to the spot.
“Didn’t see you there, O’Hare,” Jay said, trying to cut through the tension that had descended over us. She didn’t look away, and neither did I. But I felt everyone watching, waiting, for whatever was going to happen.
“Who brought her?” she snarled. “No outsiders. That’s always been the rule.”
“She’s with me.” Scarlett skidded to a halt. I hadn’t seen her jogging toward us, but from the breathless look on her face, she’d run from wherever she and Malachi had been.
“Why does that not surprise me? You always were a sucker for an outcast. Scarlett and her merry band of freaks.”
“Fuck off back to your hole, Kendall.” Scarlett came over to me and sat down, seemingly unaffected by whatever the hell was happening. “Becca is one of us now, so she has every right to be here.”
Rage burned in Kendall’s eyes, and I dropped my gaze. Why did she hate me so much? That kind of emotion didn’t just come from disliking the new girl.
“She’ll never be welcome here.” Kendall spun around and sashayed away, joining two of her friends who stood a ways back.
Scarlett glanced at me, pity in her gaze. I didn’t meet her eyes, but I felt it burning into me. Instead, I stared out at the park and regretted ever coming. Who was I to think I could fit in with these people? Lost in my depressing thoughts, I could have sworn I saw a flash of black cutting through the park. A black leather jacket the same as the one Evan wore.
“You okay?” Scarlett threw me a cautious glance, and I nodded stiffly. Thankfully, we were almost at my house. I needed to be alone. To process. “Don’t let Kendall get to you. She’s a total bitch.”
“Yeah,” I grumbled. “What’s her problem, anyway? She doesn’t even know me.” My voice trailed off.
Scarlett shrugged her shoulders. “Doesn’t matter. She’s always had a problem with outsiders. Especially ones who think they’re better than—”
“I don’t think I’m better than anyone.” I went rigid.
“That’s not what I’m saying. I know you’re cool. But Kendall? Whole other ball game. Back in ninth grade, a local family won the lotto once. It wasn’t much by some standards, but it was enough to move out of town somewhere nicer upstate. Kendall and her crew had made the girl’s life hell before they moved. It wasn’t pretty.”
My mouth dropped open. It seemed so silly when so many more important things were going on in the world.
“Listen to me, running my mouth. I’m not trying to freak you out, new girl. Just remember that many of the kids in Credence have it rough. Money’s tight, jobs are like gold dust, and the future definitely isn’t bright. Kids are dealing with all kinds of shit daily. You can hide behind your new image, but we all saw it the day you walked into CH. You come from a different world. It’ll take people a while to get used to that. To trust you.”
Scarlett’s words stung. Even though I knew she was just giving it to me straight, they burned through me like acid. I thought I’d left that girl back in Montecito, but Scarlett was right. I hadn’t. It wasn’t my fault; it was just the hand I’d been dealt. The same way that life had dealt some of the kids in Credence a shitty hand. But just because I was lucky enough to grow up in somewhere like Montecito didn’t mean I hadn’t experienced things no one should ever go through. I had my fair share of shit too, just like everyone else.
Pressing back into the seat, I didn’t reply. There wasn’t anything to say. It was going to take time—time for people to see past the girl who walked into school that first day. I could change my image; leave my Tiffany bracelet in my jewelry box, wear my thrift store clothes, and party in backstreet clubs, but I’d led a different life from most of the kids at Credence High. It wasn’t who I was anymore, but they didn’t know that—they couldn’t.
The car stopped outside my house, and I offered Scarlett a weak smile. “Thanks. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
She nodded, watching as I climbed out. Part of me hoped she’d say something—anything—to undo some of the damage, but it was too late. The words were there, swimming around in my head.
Mom greeted me at the door, frowning as Scarlett’s car pulled away with a puff of exhaust fumes spiraling into the air. “Thank god, I was worried sick.”
“Mom,” I groaned. “It’s a perfectly decent car.”
“It’s a rust box.”
“I’m home now, so stop, okay? Listen, I’m going to get washed up and go to bed.”
Her frown deepened. “Is everything okay? You look pale. You weren’t drinking, were you?”
“Geez, Mom. No, I wasn’t drinking. We hung out, talked about school, and drank soda. You’ve got to stop with the overprotective mother routine. It’s suffocating me.”
Mom’s face blanched, the color draining from her usually pink cheeks. I wanted to take the w
ords back the second I’d said them, but it was too late. “Becca, that’s not fair. Not after—”
“Everything,” I finished. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. I’m just exhausted. I shouldn’t take it out on you. Forgive me?” Flashing her the best smile I could muster, I pouted and opened my arms for a hug.
It felt wrong to ask since they’d already forgiven me for so much.
Mom nodded and wrapped her arms around me. “I know it’s not easy, but you need this, Becca. We all need this.”
Snuggling closer, I inhaled deep breaths, filling my lungs with air and reminding myself I was here with my mom and dad. And they loved me, regardless of the mistakes I’d made.
And everything was okay.
We had a new house. Dad had a new job, and Mom had her kitchen with the amazing oven. We had each other, but I owed them everything. What Dad had done for me would be a debt I could never repay—I knew that. So what choice did I have but to find a way to survive Credence?
Entering the main building, I avoided looking at myself in the glass reflection. After Scarlett’s comments last night, I’d overlooked the t-shirts in favor of the one pashmina sweater that had survived my wardrobe exorcism. A pale lilac color, it was soft, hung loosely off one shoulder, and nipped in at my waist. Next to my cropped black jeans, it looked different from the floaty skirts I used to team it with. It was probably a little over the top for school, but when I’d seen it hanging there, memories of the girl I used to be washed over me. My old life … Friends … Simpler times. And before I knew it, I was yanking it over my head and basking in its familiarity.
“Becca, over here.” Lilly waved, and I criss-crossed through the flow of kids heading to class.
“Hey.” I smiled, tucking my hair behind my ear.
Her gaze drifted to my sweater, and I saw the flash of surprise in her eyes, but she quickly schooled her features. “I’m glad you came last night.” Lilly leaned in close, out of earshot of the guys. “Don’t let Kendall get to you, okay? Scarlett said—”