by Amanda Abram
I had completely forgotten about that. Heck, half the time, I forgot Trish was even going to be in a play. “So I guess that means you're not giving me a ride home?”
“Nope. But I'm sure you can convince your soon-to-be-ex to give you a lift.”
I felt my face flush at the mention of my “soon-to-be-ex”. That was the first time Trish had used that nickname for Jase, but I already hated it.
“You might as well take advantage of rides home with him while you can,” she continued. “After Wednesday, Kylie will be the one he's giving rides to.” She paused for a moment as that look of disgust returned to her face. “Oh man, that sounded so completely wrong.”
It did. I knew she hadn't meant it to sound dirty, but that was the first place both of our minds went. And believe me when I say that associating sex with Jase and Kylie was not something I cared to do, like, ever.
Something else I didn't care to do was think about what “after Wednesday” would bring. After Wednesday, I'd be single once again. Single and in love with someone who was in love with someone else. I had a feeling that would become the story of my life.
I didn't want Wednesday to come.
“Hey, speak of the devil.”
I glanced over in the direction Trish was pointing and saw Jase talking with Eric near the entrance.
Trish groaned. “I wish he would find better friends to hang out with.”
It was a jab at Eric, of course. We hadn't discussed the whole situation with Eric since the night at Zach's party. I guess she preferred to keep her pure hatred for him to herself, which was a good thing. Despite the fact Eric had never once referred to me as anything other than “Trish's best friend”, I actually had a bit of a soft spot for him. He wasn't a self-centered jock like most of Jase's other friends. And the fact he seemed to genuinely like Trish, despite how rude she was to him, made him a pretty decent guy in my book. And to be honest, it angered me a bit that Trish refused to treat him as anything more than a pest.
Feeling annoyed with her for the one thousandth time in four days, I said, “I'll go ask him if he can give me a lift. I'll catch you later.”
I didn't wait for her to say goodbye before I strolled off in her brother's direction.
I hadn't spoken with Jase since my realization that I liked him as more than a pretend boyfriend, so I wasn't sure how I was going to act around him. Would it be totally obvious I was in love with him, like it was obvious he was in love with Kylie?
“Hey,” I said cautiously as I approached the two boys.
They both glanced over at me at the same time. Eric gave me a huge grin while Jase just gave me a short nod.
“Hey, Trish's best friend,” Eric said, somewhat cheerfully. He turned to Jase and slapped him on the back. “See ya in homeroom. Bye, Trish's best friend.” He gave me a wave before taking off.
I smiled and waved back. “You know, I used to hate that nickname, but it's starting to grow on me.”
Jase shoved his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. “What's up, Lex?”
I suddenly felt tongue-tied. Jase looked really good. Granted, he looked good every day, but the butterflies in my stomach were making me take notice of his appearance more than I normally did.
“I was wondering,” I began slowly, “if perhaps you could give me a ride home after school? Trish has rehearsal.”
He inhaled sharply before replying. “Sorry, I can't today. I've actually agreed to help with the set and I've been asked to stay after today to help finish everything up.”
I cocked my head to one side and glanced at him curiously. He was helping with the set of Trish's play? Since when? “I didn't know you were involved with that.”
“I wasn't. But Trish talked me into it over the weekend, so...yeah.”
“Oh,” I said, disappointed. “That's okay, then. I'll just take the bus home with Aaron.”
Eww. The bus. I hated taking the bus. It was loud and obnoxious and full of freshmen. I was guaranteed to be the oldest one on it. And probably the coolest, too, which wasn't saying a whole lot for everyone else, since I really wasn't all that cool.
“I'm sure you'll survive,” he said dryly as the bell rang. “I gotta go. Catch you later.” He then rushed off before I could say another word.
Well that hadn't gone exactly as I'd planned. I thought for sure I could get a ride out of him, but it was like pulling teeth to even get him to smile at me.
A feeling of sudden panic washed over me. Jase seemed distant and almost disinterested in talking to me. While it was probably nothing more than him just getting up on the wrong side of the bed that morning, my mind instantly jumped to one conclusion.
Things had changed between us, despite the fact we'd agreed not to let them. It was very possible that what happened between us on Friday night had permanently damaged our relationship, and we would never be the same again.
That thought made me feel queasy.
“So I hear you're going to need a ride home?”
I practically jumped out of my skin at the sound of Jeffrey's voice behind me. With a quiet groan only I could hear, I spun around to face him.
“No, I'm taking the bus.”
Jeffrey grinned as he jogged up the steps to meet me. “You hate taking the bus. Let me drive you home.”
“No thank you,” I said firmly, starting to make my way towards the door.
He fell into stride beside me. “C'mon. It'll give us a chance to talk.”
The way he said 'talk' sounded kinda sleazy. Like what he'd really meant to say was, “It'll give us a chance to stick our tongues in each other's mouths”. That was certainly something that was never going to happen again.
I stopped walking and turned in his direction. Grabbing his sleeve, I yanked him away from the crowd of kids piling into the building. “Look, Jeffrey, we don't need to talk, okay? What happened on Saturday didn't mean anything. It was just a kiss, nothing more.”
This conversation sounded an awful lot like the one I'd had with Jase on Saturday. The only difference was that this time, I actually meant what I was saying.
“Lexi...”
I held up a hand to stop him from talking. “No, Jeffrey. Look, I will probably always have some sort of feelings for you, alright? I'm not going to deny that. But what you said that night, about why you dumped me for Amber-Lynne Rose, it made perfect sense. We can't commit ourselves to one person. We're teenagers for crying out loud! We should be dating different people. And that's what I'm doing. I've already moved on.”
“Yeah, with Holloway,” he scoffed. “He's just about the worst guy you could have moved on with.”
“I don't think so. He's a great guy. Remember? You used to be friends with him yourself.”
“That was a long time ago. People change. Jase has changed. He's not the same kid you used to play on the swing set with. He's going to hurt you.”
I crossed my arms tightly over my chest. “You mean like you hurt me?”
He glanced down at the ground sheepishly. Apparently, he couldn't think of a good way to respond to that.
“We have to get to homeroom,” I mumbled, turning away from him.
As I merged with the crowd of kids walking through the door, I glanced back at him. “Thanks for the ride offer, but I'm taking the bus home today.”
***
I wasn't going to take the bus home.
I spent all day at school thinking. About Jase. About Jase and Kylie. And about Jase and me. And I decided I wasn't okay with the fact Jase and I were going to break up on Wednesday. I also decided I was going to try and convince Jase of postponing our breakup for a few more days, perhaps even up to a couple of weeks. And who cared if Trish didn't like it? She didn't control my life, or Jase's life for that matter. Besides, she would get over it. She would have to.
By the end of my last class, I decided I would stay after school. I would hang out in the theater and watch the rehearsal. And maybe, at some point, I would go backstage to where Jase would probabl
y be and talk to him. I would propose my idea to him and pray to God he would agree with me that it was too soon to end our fake relationship. Why wouldn't he? Every time I had mentioned breaking it off, he'd been the one to convince me it wasn't time yet. Yes, that was my plan. It was a very good plan, especially since it got me out of riding the school bus home.
“You're sure you want to watch the rehearsal?” Trish asked as me as we were making our way toward the theater. “I mean, you're going to be watching the actual production next week. Don't you want to wait and be surprised?”
“Trish, it's Cinderella. I've seen the movie. I've read the fairy tale. There is no surprise left to be had.”
“Not true. You haven't seen me as Cinderella yet. That will be a surprise.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “Do you not want me there or something?”
“Don't be silly. I just don't want you to be bored.”
“If I get bored, I've got homework I can do.”
Someone from inside the theater called out her name. “I gotta go,” she said. “If you really think you can stomach it, then fine. I'll see you after rehearsal.”
I nodded. I was about to follow her in when someone from behind me called out my name. Or, rather, my other name.
“Trish's best friend!”
“Eric,” I said with a grin, turning around to see him walking toward me.
“What are you still doing here?” he asked. “The buses already left.”
“I'm staying after,” I informed him. “I was planning on watching Trish rehearse the play.”
“Ah.” He drew the word out longer than he needed to. Stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he said, “Hey, if you're not busy right now, could we maybe...I dunno...talk?”
I was instantly curious. All of the conversations Eric and I'd ever had with one another in our entire lifetime could be summed up in just two sentences: “Hey, Trish's best friend” and “Hey, Eric”. So naturally, I found the fact he wanted to talk to me to be suspicious.
“Sure. Wanna take a walk?”
“I'd love to,” he said, smiling.
We began to walk down the hallway in silence. It was eerie how empty and quiet the hallways were after school, but it was also nice. No one was shoving me aside to get to class on time, which was definitely an improvement.
“So what's up?” I asked him finally.
“Well,” he began slowly. “I guess I was wondering...has Trish mentioned anything about me lately? Anything at all?”
Oh, of course. He wanted to talk to me about Trish. How could I not have realized that right away?
I gave him an uncomfortable glance. “Um...not really.” I hated to admit it to him, but I wasn't going to lie to him either. Trish hadn't mentioned him at all since the party. Until this morning, when she pretty much said she wished Jase would ditch him as a friend. I opted not to inform him of that.
“Oh.”
I could hear the disappointment in his voice and it almost broke my heart.
“I really screwed up, didn't I?” He turned to me with a pained expression on his face. “At the party, with that college guy. I made Trish hate me. More than she already did.”
“You know what, Eric? You didn't screw up. Not at all.”
His eyes lit up. “No?”
“No, you didn't. You were concerned about Trish. And rightfully so. And kudos to you for actually having the guts to do something about it. Did you go too far by picking a fight with that guy? Maybe you did, I don't know. But either way, Trish shouldn't be mad at you or hate you for caring about her.”
As I spoke, I couldn't help but be mad at Trish for making Eric feel so bad about trying to protect her. Why couldn't she see how crazy he was about her? Why couldn't she just give him a chance?
“I do care about her,” he said softly. “Is it that obvious I like her?”
“To me, yes. To Trish, not so much.”
We stopped walking once we'd made a half circle and ended up at the back entrance of the theater.
“Listen.” I placed a hand gently on his arm. “Trish is going through a phase right now where she thinks it's impossible to find a decent boyfriend in high school. That's why she was all into that college guy at the party, because he's older. But you have to believe me when I say there will come a day when Trish wakes up and realizes the perfect guy for her has been right in front of her all along.”
He nodded slowly, taking in everything I was saying. And then finally, he said, “You are referring to me, right?”
I giggled. “Yes, Eric. I'm referring to you. Just hang in there, okay? And don't give up on her.”
“I wasn't planning on it,” he said, beaming. “Thank you...Lexi.”
His voice sounded strained when he said my name, as though he'd really had to force himself to not say “Trish's best friend”.
I gave him a warm, encouraging smile and had to resist the urge to hug him. I was really starting to like Eric and I wished that Trish would to.
“This is my stop.” I pointed to the theater entrance. “I thought maybe I would say hello to Jase.”
“Oh, that's right. He's helping with the set, right?”
“Apparently,” I said with a shrug.
“I'll say hello, too,” he said, following me inside.
I turned around and said, “You're just hoping you'll run into Trish back here.”
He just smirked in response.
There were a few students bustling around with props in their hands, but when I glanced around, I couldn't find Jase anywhere.
“Excuse me,” I said to a tall, lanky girl I recognized as being a sophomore named Megan. “Is Jase Holloway around here somewhere?”
Megan pushed her glasses up her nose. “He was, but he took off a while ago to get snacks for everyone from the vending machine in the teacher's lounge.” She paused. “You know, now that you mention it, he's been gone for an awful long time.” She then shrugged and went back to doing what she'd been doing before I'd interrupted her.
“Hmm.” I chewed on my bottom lip. “I wonder what's taking him so long.”
Eric pulled out his phone from his pocket. “I'll text him and see where he is.” When he was done, he said, “Maybe the reason he's been gone so long is because something got stuck in the machine and when he tried to shake it loose, the whole thing fell over on top of him.”
I glanced wide-eyed over at him. That thought hadn't crossed my mind, but now that it had, an uncomfortable knot began to form in the pit of my stomach. I knew Eric was just joking, but what if he was right? I'd heard horror stories of people getting seriously injured—or even killed—by vending machines toppling over onto them. And even though I knew the odds that Jase was currently lying underneath a toppled-over vending machine were slim, I still had the sudden urge to go the teacher's lounge just to make sure he was okay.
Eric must have detected my concern because he added, “But I'm sure that's not the case.”
His phone chirped then and my mind was put at ease. It was most likely Jase texting back with his whereabouts.
“So where is he?” I asked as Eric read the text.
He typed up a quick text in response and then glanced up at me. “Huh? Oh, I don't know. That was just my mom reminding me to pick up milk on the way home.” He stuffed his phone back into his pocket. “Hey, why don't we just go check out the teacher's lounge and see if he's still there? Even if he's not, maybe the vending machine will have Kit Kats.”
The words Kit Kats were not even fully out of his mouth before I was on the move. I was hungry and Kit Kats were my favorite candy bar. And if we happened to find Jase there too, that would just be an added bonus.
By the time we made it there, I’d found a whole dollar's worth in dimes and nickels and hoped the potential Kit Kat bar wouldn't cost any more than that. We entered the lounge and stopped, taking a look around to make sure no teachers were lurking about.
“Their couches are so much nicer than the ones in the se
niors' lounge,” Eric lamented in a hushed voice.
“Why are you whispering?”
“Because,” he whispered again, “I feel like we're not supposed to be in here and for some reason I believe whispering makes us more inconspicuous.”
“I don't think we have to worry. I don't think there are any teachers in here right now.” Still, just in case, I kept my voice low as well.
There was no vending machine that I could see, so I figured it must have been behind the closed door on the other side of the room. I pointed to the door and looked at Eric. “Should we see what's behind door number one?”
He nodded. We began moving again, this time toward the door. Turning back to me, Eric said, “Hey, do you have any change? I want a Kit Kat.”
“I only have enough change for myself, and if there's a Kit Kat in there, it's mine.”
He gave me a pout as he reached out and grabbed the door handle.
“Wait!” I said. “What if there is a teacher in there? We might get into trouble.”
“Or what if there's a Kit Kat in there? We might be able to eat it.”
I thought about it for a moment. “Good point.” Pushing him aside, I turned the handle myself and walked through the door.
And then stopped dead in my tracks as my breath hitched in my throat.
As my jaw dropped and practically hit the floor.
There was no teacher behind the door. There might not have even been a Kit Kat bar behind it either, but that was the farthest thing from my mind.
What was behind the door was Jase.
But he wasn't lying beneath a toppled-over vending machine.
And he wasn't getting snacks.
He was with Kylie.
And they were kissing.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Numb.
From the top of my head to the tips of my toes, that's all I felt. Numb.
I stood there in the teacher's lounge, frozen, staring at the display of affection in front of me with feelings of horror, betrayal and envy forming an alliance in the pit of my stomach. Jase and Kylie were kissing. And I mean really kissing. Kissing-like-there-was-no-tomorrow kissing.