by Suzy Shearer
Isabella lost it.
She lost all sense of time. All she could feel was her body shuddering as that third climax rippled across. She thought Gabriel collapsed against her but she wasn’t sure as she followed the wonderful feeling. Never in her entire life had she experienced multiple orgasms. Never had she felt ones as hard and strong as these. She actually felt drained. She had an idea that Gabriel untied her and she thought she felt him lie beside her then gather her into his arms but she was too relaxed, too satisfied to even know for sure.
Chapter Fourteen
Gabriel lay beside Isabella. He propped himself on one elbow as he watched her. Her pupils were dilated and she stared unseeing above her. He could hear her heart pounding as he watched the rapid rise and fall of her chest as she breathed hard and fast. Drawing a hand across her breast, he laid it across her stomach. He realised he could spend all day watching her and never tire. As he watched her eyes closed and she gave a sigh. To his ears it sounded blissful, contented and he hoped it was.
For him she was everything he imagined and more. She was so responsive. He couldn’t believe no man had ever gone down on that sweet pussy. He wondered what had happened.
When he was sure she was asleep he got up and turned up the heaters. Going into the house, he grabbed a thick blanket and on the way back he picked up Isabella’s kimono. He had the feeling she may wake embarrassed. Covering them both with the blanket, he lay down beside her again and eased an arm under her. She turned in her slumber and snuggled into his chest. Gabriel couldn’t hold back his grin of delight.
Time seemed different. He wanted her to sleep but he wanted her to wake. How long they lay there he really couldn’t say but he felt her body tense and knew she’d woken.
Gabriel understood now he had to handle things very carefully. He knew someone at some time had filled her head with falsehoods, thought she’d filled her life with misplaced shame. He didn’t want to damage the fragile bridge he was building with her.
Dipping his head, he kissed her forehead.
“Hello, beautiful Issie.”
She quickly looked at him. Red suffused her face but she gave him a hesitant smile.
“Do you know how wonderful you are? I could spend my whole life looking at you.”
Her eyes bored into his but she didn’t answer.
“It’s true.” He gave her a wink and a cheeky grin, “Not to mention that the sex is unbelievable.”
Her blush got deeper but he saw a tiny upturn on her mouth.
Seriously he said, “Tell me honestly, Isabella. How do you feel?”
“Feel?” she murmured and seemed to think on the question before saying, “I feel…”
She gave a shrug and moved her head to almost bury it against his body. He gently caressed her back until he felt her relax again. The feel of her skin under his fingers was magical, he felt his cock jump.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
He felt her shake her head then she looked up.
“No.”
Gabriel smiled at her and brushed a hair from across her face. He’d love to know what was going on in her mind, he just hoped she wasn’t regretting her decision.
“But you feel okay?” he asked worriedly.
“Yep.”
“You don’t regret anything, do you, Issie?”
She looked thoughtful then said, “No. No, I don’t. I’ve never… It was…” She shrugged, as if lost on how to express herself, then blushed so much Gabriel felt a huge grin come over his face.
Then she whispered, “I liked it.”
He knew it had probably taken a lot to admit her enjoyment.
“I’m glad. I really enjoyed it, too, Issie, a lot. Want to talk about things?”
“You said you don’t do nice. Does that mean you’ve always, um… done this?” she asked hesitantly.
“Yep. I get such a kick out of being in control. I adored watching your face when I bit down hard. I love it when you can’t move, when you have to accept the things I do, take the pain I inflict.”
Isabella seemed genuinely confused by his words and asked, “But how?”
She sat up, wrapping the blanket tightly around her. Drawing her knees up, she held her arms around them, her head resting on them, looking down at the bed. She whispered so softly Gabriel had to move his head to hear her.
“How do you know you won’t hurt someone or that they want things?”
“I try to make sure I’m always in control, Issie, and as for doing something you didn’t like—well, we’ll talk. We talk about things you’d like to do, things you’d like to try and things that you wouldn’t. For example, I only smacked you with my hand today. If you were willing to try I would use a crop, a paddle or something. If you said you didn’t want that, I would only ever use my hand. In fact, if you said you didn’t want me to ever smack you again, I wouldn’t.”
“I don’t know any of this,” she confessed with a little sadness in her voice.
“I know you don’t.”
She raised her head and finally looked at him.
“I understand this is all new to you, Issie. I’m guessing you’ve had a bad experience with someone over sex. Understand, Issie, this is all about you. This is about what you want. If you want more, if you’d allow me, then together we find things we both enjoy.”
Isabella nodded.
He explained, “It’s like how you called red. We talked a little. It was your choice if we continued or not.”
She nodded again.
“How about you get dressed and we go into the house to have coffee?”
“Okay.”
Gabriel passed over her kimono and got up. Picking his jeans up from where he’d tossed them, he pulled them on. Isabella put her arms through the kimono sleeves but he caught a glimpse of her luscious body as she stood and belted the robe. Gabriel had to hold back his groan. This woman excited him like no other had in his entire life. He wanted her body, he wanted her mind, and he wanted every part of her.
After pulling on his old T-shirt, he held out his hand and was gratified when she put hers into it. Together they walked back into the main studio and Gabriel pointed down the long hallway.
“Just go down the hall through the cream door instead of going outside and I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”
“Okay.”
After watching her walk into the change room Gabriel went into the house. He made sure the air-conditioning was on high. That plus the underfloor heating meant she would be warm. It was late February, winter was well and truly here, and there was the chance of snow in a few days’ time. When she came into the kitchen he knew he was staring at her but he just couldn’t get enough. The sight of her filled him with such adoration.
“There’s a powder room through that door and on the right down the hall.”
“Thank you.”
The room felt empty when she left as he turned on the coffee machine. When she returned he sat her on one of the high stools then gave her a mug. Gabriel couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He gave her a kiss—just a tiny peck on the cheek then sat alongside her.
Amazingly the silence between them was comfortable. Somehow she wriggled into his heart and he knew he didn’t want to ever let her go. He heard her breathe deeply.
“Have you ever married, Gabriel?”
“No. I got close once but she didn’t want to be married to a struggling artist.” He shrugged. “I guess she didn’t really love me and to be honest looking back I don’t think I really loved her as much as I thought I did. I think I was a kid playing at love and happy families.”
“Have you always been an artist? I mean, did you ever do anything else?”
“Oh yes, I pushed papers from one pile to another. Did that when I finished getting my BA in fine arts at The Slade. Worked in an office until I was twenty-nine. Then I chucked it all in. I’d saved everything I could. Decided I’d spend two years painting. I moved back to my parents’ home, they have a big place with fo
ur outbuildings. I turned one into a flat and studio, paid them rent in return. Figured if I couldn’t make a living by the end of it I’d give up.”
“But you did make it.”
“I did. Took a while. Those first two years were hard.” He laughed. “Anyway now, guess I’m a little like Leigh Price. I get lots of money for doing what I love.”
She grinned at him and Gabriel felt his heart miss a beat. He needed to let her know that for him it wasn’t just about sex. He wanted more.
“Isabella, I really want something more from this.” She lifted her head quickly to stare at him in surprise. “I want…Okay, this might sound corny but I want a relationship with you. I want a lot more than just sex.”
“Why?”
He could hear the puzzlement in her voice.
“Why? I think we’d be good together and heavens woman, look at you. You’re gorgeous, smart, talented. Any man would be honoured to be with you.”
She snorted, actually snorted as she turned back to look ahead. Gabriel pulled her chin around until he could look into her face properly.
“Isabella, I don’t know what happened to you but I’m guessing some idiot prick didn’t appreciate what he had. Rest assured, I know exactly what I could have and if you’ll allow me I would love to give you all the pleasure I possibly can, both in bed and out.”
Her eyes filled with tears and he could see her blink rapidly, struggling to hold them in.
“Was it that fool from the other night?” he asked softly.
She nodded.
“Is he your ex-husband?”
“No.”
She gave a tiny sigh. He saw her body tense so he just waited to let her decide whether or not to speak. He just put a hand over hers to tell her he was there. He was in no hurry. Minutes passed.
“I…I was nineteen. I thought I was in love but he…he just liked collecting young women. He’d brag about it,” she said shamefully.
She stopped speaking but Gabriel waited patiently. Finally she spoke again.
“He was married. Then I found out he was chasing other women as well as me. We’d slept together a few times but it was…” She squirmed with embarrassment. “It was boring. We had a fight. He blamed me for the lousy sex and I told him it was because he wasn’t forceful enough.
“So he said would I like it if he tied me to the bed and smacked me. I got excited just thinking he meant it.”
Gabriel could hear the absolute shame in her voice as she self-consciously continued. Gabriel got the impression she needed to get this out and he was positive she’d never told anyone before. He held her hand gently, rubbing it with his thumb, trying to let her know he was there with her through her pain.
“He looked at me as if I had a horrible disease. He…he told me I was a deviant and sick. Said I was twisted and needed professional help.” Gabriel’s heart ached for the pain she must have gone through. “He said…he said I was a perverted, deranged monster. That normal people didn’t want that.”
Those threatening tears finally spilt out. They ran down her cheeks unchecked and dropped onto the bench. Gabriel wanted to hold her in his arms and keep her safe from the words that had hurt and wounded. He leant over and kissed her shoulder, so distressed that she’d lived with this buried for so long.
“Issie, I hope you understand he was wrong. I’m betting he was so inadequate he’d blame everyone else rather than admit. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a strong man. Nothing at all perverted about enjoying being restrained or spanked. Do you understand that now?”
She turned her head and finally looked at him through watery eyes.
“I…I looked up that word, those words,” she stammered slightly as another tear made its slow journey down her cheek. “All those years.” She shook her head and sniffed. “I was just a kid when he told me all those horrid things and all those years I believed I was a sick monster.”
Her voice cracked with both anger and shame as she wiped a cheek subconsciously with the back of her hand.
“Hush, sweetheart. You’re not sick and you are definitely no monster. It’s that fool who’s the monster.”
He wanted to cradle her in his arms but somehow knew she had to complete her confession without him holding her. As he watched she seemed to straighten, seemed to draw hidden strength. When she spoke again her voice sounded firmer and more confident.
“Last night I realised I’d allowed someone from my youth to control my life. I’d let him take away my chances of falling in love. I’ve let one person’s opinion dictate how I live, lost over thirty years living in fear and shame.”
Looking down, she shook her head again then looked at Gabriel. “I’m so naïve. I’ve been such a fool and I don’t want him to take anything else from me ever again.”
“I’m so glad, Issie. I want to be there for you, I want to be the one you turn to. I want to be the man you want if you’ll give me a chance.”
The smile she gave him was sweet as she said awkwardly, “This is a start, I guess. I’ve never told anyone before.”
She gave him a shy grin and he kissed her nose.
“I figured. So only tell me if you want. What about your husband?”
Isabella laughed sarcastically.
“That creep.”
Turning her head back to look ahead, she didn’t say any more and Gabriel was amazed that she’d told him as much as she had.
“Isabella, I’m really honoured you told me everything. I honestly am,” he told her earnestly.
“I don’t know why I did.” She took a deep breath. “But then maybe I do. Maybe it’s because I don’t want to live the way I’ve been.”
Lifting her head proudly, Isabella looked directly at him.
“I’m through with letting other people dictate aspects of my life.”
“That’s the way. Grab every happiness you can, Issie,” Gabriel agreed.
“You asked me about my husband. We married when I was thirty. I’d actually avoided men all the time plus I was really busy. I’d been getting a lot of modelling work.”
“I know you were in great demand. I always wanted you to model for me but your fees were way too high at that time. Then when I could finally afford to pay them you retired.”
Surprised, Isabella blurted out, “You did?”
“Hell, Issie, you were and still are the most beautiful woman I’d seen. I was so envious of those artists who got to see you in the flesh.” He winked. “I could only drool over their paintings of you.”
She blushed and took a sip of coffee before continuing.
“To be honest, at the time I didn’t know why I married him. I knew his reputation but…Anyway, we were only married a few months when I finally kicked him out. Not only was he sleeping with every woman but me, he also took money. I’d noticed he was withdrawing large sums of money and when I challenged him about it he got nasty. I opened another account and transferred most into it. He kept asking for money. I gave him some but he wanted more and more so I ended up saying ‘no more.’
“He saw red and hit me. It opened my eyes and that was finally the end of things. Maybe I was stupid but I gave him enough to buy a ticket to Italy and a couple of grand. Anything to see the back of him.
“We lived in separate countries for eight years then divorced. It wasn’t a nice divorce. Not sure how but he discovered I was making money so he came back telling me he loved me and wanted to make the marriage work. I said no and he went nuts.”
“You mean after eight years away he thought he could just say he loved you and you’d welcome him with open arms after all he’d done?” Gabriel couldn’t believe a man would be so dumb.
“Yep, stupid, I know. Anyway, when I said no he sent me threatening emails. Told me I owed him and he wanted millions as a divorce settlement. A couple of times he hit me. I went to the police and got an order against him.”
Isabella seemed lost in her thoughts for a moment. He saw a tiny smile flit across her face.
“What a prick! I can’t believe anyone would be such an idiot.”
“I know. He got nothing in the divorce except a huge fine and community time for the assault.”
“I’m glad,” Gabriel said, satisfied. “I guess that’s why you haven’t been out much.”
“No, I swore off men and had the occasional date.”
“No lovers?”
“I was too scared.” She looked into her coffee mug.
“I thought I was a deviant. I couldn’t face another man telling me I was sick. Even Peter, my ex-husband, had told me I wasn’t normal in bed.” Her face went bright red as she mumbled uncomfortably, “Probably because I couldn’t get excited with him.”
“Oh, my dearest Issie, it’s true you aren’t normal in bed. You’re fucking exceptional!”
He laughed at her gasp of shock.
“Honestly, Issie, I could make love to you every single hour for the rest of my life. As for not getting excited, gee, that’s the biggest load of rubbish I’ve ever heard.”
Isabella lifted her coffee mug to her lips but before she drank she said softly, “I’ve never gotten excited before.”
“Isabella, put the mug down and look at me,” he spoke with firm authority.
Surprised, she put the mug on the counter with a bang and turned to him.
“Isabella, getting excited is nothing to be ashamed about. It’s wonderful. It means I’m doing something right for you. If you weren’t excited, if you didn’t have a climax it would be my fault, not yours. Do you understand?”
“Your fault?” she asked, confused.
“Of course it would be mine. Any man can fuck a woman and get himself off but that’s not what it’s about. It’s about giving a woman the ultimate pleasure. Making sure she will always remember how wonderful it was. If a man can’t do that then it’s his fault and his fault alone.”
They drank the remainder of their coffee in silence. Gabriel knew he’d given Isabella a few things to think about. He didn’t want to pressure her, he wanted her to turn to him. To tell him she wanted more from him.