The Big Book of Girl Stuff

by Bart King

  It’s fun to try to figure out what category different flavors fall under. For example, if you eat chili peppers, you may think they taste hot. But you’re actually not “tasting” them at all. You have a type of cell in your mouth (and throat and nose) called trigeminal (pronounced try-jem-in-el) cells. The job of these cells is to report PAIN to the brain. When you eat hot chilis, these cells are tricked into going on red alert, and they begin sending their pain message, even though there is no real damage to the mouth. That’s why the pain goes away pretty quickly.

  Seasoning food with spices to add to its flavor is pretty standard. But be careful . . . there might be poison in your spice drawer. Nutmeg is poisonous unless eaten in small amounts. One whole nutmeg is enough to do some real damage. And if you know any girls named Nutmeg, avoid them just to be safe. (Heck, we even know some Megans who are troublemakers!)

  Garlic Breath! Garlic adds a terrific taste to food, but it gives people horrible breath! Alfonso the Wise (1221–1284) was a Spanish king who hated garlic breath so much, he outlawed anyone who had eaten garlic in the last month from visiting his court.

  Your nose is just as important as your mouth when tasting food. Like taste, food aromas also smell very different to different people. Scientists now believe that there are some smells that only about 10 percent of people can detect.

  Just as there are super tasters, there are also “super smellers.” (They smell super!) If you think you are a super smeller, there are careers to be found in your nose. You could be an “odor judge.” That’s a super smeller who works for a deodorant or perfume company.

  A lot of a food’s taste comes from its smell. The importance of smelling is revealed when you eat food when you have a stuffy nose. When you can’t smell very well the food seems to have hardly any taste either! Even super smellers have this problem. Don’t believe us? Try this:

  Test Your Nose

  What’s the difference between an apple and an onion?

  You Will Need: A nose, an onion, an apple, a friend.

  Cut up an onion and an apple into identically sized cubes. (Cut the skin off the apple and peel the onion first.) Then wash your hands and go into another room. Blindfold yourself and pinch your nose closed perfectly tight. Have a friend come in with the cubes on a plate and quickly pop a cube of either the onion or the apple into your mouth. As you chew, keep your nose sealed so that you can’t smell.

  Amazingly, most people can’t tell the difference between an apple and an onion this way, unless they are guessing based on the food’s texture in their mouth. Behold the power of your nose!

  So now we know that what food tastes like is only part of its appeal. Not only is the smell of food important, so is the look and even the sound of food. Hey, if it wasn’t for Snap, Crackle, and Pop, Rice Krispies might have gone out of business a long time ago!

  If you are hungry and you can smell good food, you are already anticipating something great. Who you eat with, what the lighting and surroundings are like, what kind of a mood you are in, even the silverware can affect how much you enjoy a meal. Experiments have been done where food is served under puke-green lighting. Even though the meals were delicious and prepared by expert chefs, people just could not stomach eating the food.

  “It rocks my face!” This is what you say for food that tastes so good, calling it “good” or “delicious” doesn’t really cut it.

  Gum

  Yeah, we know that gum isn’t food. Even if you swallow it, your body can’t digest it. But humans have enjoyed chewing on things like tree resin since the ancient days. While parents may think gum unladylike, and teachers may hate to find it under desks, gum is hard to resist.

  The “chicle” tree has resin (or sap) that is good for making chewing gum. (You’ve heard of Chiclets, right?) But these days, most gums are made with something that’s listed on your gum pack as “PVA,” or polyvinyl acetate. What is PVA? It’s plastic!

  But that plastic just might make you smarter! In 2004, a dentistry professor at New York University did a study comparing test scores between gum-chewing students and those who did without. The gum-chewers averaged a “B” on their tests, and the non-chewers only got a “C.”

  *The world record for biggest bubblegum bubble is held by 15-year-old Susan Williams. She blew a bubble bigger than a basketball to become a famous bubblehead. By setting the record, she won a lifetime’s supply of bubblegum from the brand she prefers: Bubble Yum. To blow big bubbles like Susan, chew until the flavor is gone from the gum. You may also want to consider taking a swig of cold water. As you may know, cold gum is stiffer and keeps its bubble longer!

  Really Bad Candy Ideas

  There are some candy ideas that should never have been made.

  The Exploding Candy Bar! During World War II, Germany designed an exploding chocolate bar. The explosive was surrounded by a thin layer of chocolate. As soon as someone broke a piece of the bar off, kaboom! That’s one way to keep Halloween candy safe.

  Animal Gland Life Savers! Musk is a liquid from the gland of an animal. (Ever see a cat spray a wall? Musky.) Did you know there are “musk” flavored Life Savers? This is not a good candy idea. And if you have ever had a Necco, you may have wondered what the purple Necco flavor is supposed to be. It’s clove. Since some people smoke cloves in cigarettes, maybe “tobacco-flavored” candy is next?

  Chocolate-Covered Vegetable Sandwich! But the All-Time Worst Idea for candy was the “Vegetable Sandwich.” It was a candy made from dried-out vegetables (like peas, cabbage, and celery) that were then covered in chocolate. It is such a horrible idea, we are getting goose bumps right now just thinking about it. Dried cabbage covered in chocolate. Blech!

  Recipes

  Although this isn’t a cookbook, we’ve included some tasty snacks that we like.

  Frouta kè Yaoùrti

  This traditional Greek snack is really good . . . and really good for you!

  You Will Need: Four cups of any sliced fresh fruit or fresh fruit mix, plain yogurt, almonds, honey. Optional: Grated lemon rind.

  Combine one cup of plain yogurt and three tablespoons of honey in a bowl. Add lemon rind, if you are using it.

  Mix your fruit and almonds in another bowl. (Berries, grapes, melons, bananas, apples, peaches, nectarines, and oranges are some possibilities.) Then pour the yogurt over the fruit.

  Ice Cream Sandwich

  If you like sweet stuff stuffed between something, these are for you!

  You Will Need: At least two cookies (anything will work, but homemade chocolate chip, oatmeal, or Snicker-doodles are our favorites), your favorite ice cream or frozen yogurt, miniature chocolate chips.

  The average girl eats almost 15 quarts of ice cream a year. (We don’t recommend trying to keep up with her!)

  For this tasty treat, scoop about 1/2 cup of ice cream onto one cookie. Then make a sandwich by pressing the other cookie on top, so that the ice cream comes to the edges of the sandwich. Turn the cookie on its side and roll the ice cream edge in miniature chocolate chips so they stick to ice cream. Then eat it!

  *A Japanese ice cream business named Ice Cream City has a number of strange flavors available. These include spinach, garlic, tomato, seaweed, oyster, chicken, and wheat.

  *Do you like peanut butter? How about hot peppers? If so, then you’ll love Jalapeño Kick. This is peanut butter that is flavored with hot peppers. It comes in a tube! Offer to make your friends a sandwich and enjoy the fireworks. (Extra credit for hiding the milk!)

  Demon Corn! Historians believe that popcorn is native to North America. Europeans had never heard of it until a Native American named Quadequina showed popcorn to the Pilgrims. Quadequina explained that the reason the kernels “popped” when they got hot was because a little demon lived inside them. If it got too hot, the demon had to angrily leave the kernel and find a new home.

  Cool Slang! Food coma: Being so full after a good meal, all you can do is sit in a daze. You might be able to mutter, “I’m SO full.�
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  Homer Goes “Mmmm”!

  Even though there is a whole channel devoted to food (The Food Channel), nobody on television is more devoted to eating food than Homer Simpson. His “Mmmm . . . donuts” is world famous. Here are some of the other things that have made Homer go “Mmmmm.”

  “Mmmm . . . unprocessed fishsticks.”

  “Mmmm . . . 64 slices of American Cheese.”

  “Mmmm . . . hog fat.”

  “Mmmm . . . free goo.”

  “Mmmm . . . open-faced club sandwich.”

  “Mmmm . . . money.”

  “Mmmm . . . me.”

  “Mmmm . . . unexplained bacon.”

  “Mmmm . . . forbidden donut.”

  Special Vegetarian Section

  Many girls think about becoming vegetarians. It might be because they believe it’s a healthier lifestyle or because they support an animal’s right to live. In other words, they are thinking about what they eat and they are trying to do the right thing. So good for them! But there are also BAD reasons to be a vegetarian. These include trying to lose weight, doing it because all your friends are, or wanting to say “rutabaga” as often as possible.

  *Lisa Simpson is a vegetarian, so she doesn’t eat cartoon animals.

  The key thing for a vegetarian girl to know is that she needs protein. Meat and dairy products are great sources of protein, so if they are eliminated or reduced, there may be a protein problem. Soybeans are a good source of protein—so we hope you like tofu! (It’s made of soybeans.) Or you could try this:

  Edamame (pronounced ed-uh-Mom-ay) Mama

  A tasty snack and a great source of protein!

  You Will Need: Soybeans (a.k.a. Edamame), salt, a pot of water, a colander.

  Natural soybeans still in the pod are delicious. You can buy them fresh or frozen; supermarkets often stock them in the frozen vegetables section under their Japanese name, edamame.

  Fresh soybeans are usually steamed for around five minutes (or until they’re bright green), while the frozen ones can be boiled for 2 to 3 minutes. Then they are drained and put into a bowl. We like to lightly salt them, too.

  You don’t eat the shell, just the soybeans. Bring the pod to your mouth and pop them out with your teeth; that way you can enjoy the salt, and it makes this a food that keeps you busy, like unshelled sunflower seeds. This is the perfect food to snack on during a movie or between meals, and it’s also a great appetizer.

  There are other ways to get protein without meat by combining foods. For example, rice and beans or nuts and beans together can create proteins. Also, many vegetarians eat dairy products, eggs, and even fish. So a glass of milk or a piece of cheese can be very important for a vegetarian girl.

  Vegetarian or not, taking a multivitamin every day is a good idea, especially if a girl has started her period. Among other things, it helps keep enough iron in her system. That’s iron, like the metal.

  *There should be enough iron in your body to make one nail.

  The Master of Cheese! One of the most specialized jobs in the world is being a Maitre Fromager (pronounced mate-trah fro-maj). That’s French for “Cheese Master.” The Maitre Fromager is in charge of tasting and testing different cheeses to judged their quality. But it’s a dangerous job. “Cheese elbow” is a common injury you can get from cutting different cheese over and over again every day. (Hey, if you had to cut the cheese for a living, you’d be in pain too!)

  Here are some of the different vegetarian types:

  Vegans won’t eat any food from any animal; no meat, dairy, honey, or eggs.

  Raw Foodists are kind of like vegans who don’t cook.

  Fruitarians will only eat fruits, nuts, and any vegetables that can be eaten without killing the plant. (So cucumbers would be okay, but not carrots.)

  Pizza-Cheater Vegetarians pick the meat off their pizza and may even try to soak up the pepperoni oil with a napkin.

  Pesceterians will eat fish, because everyone knows that fish are swimming vegetables.

  Lacto-Ovo-Vegetarians will eat dairy products and eggs. (They also need to get a less silly name!) Nachoarians claim to be vegetarians, but only as an excuse to subsist solely on nacho chips and Velveeta cheese.

  Sev Mamra!

  What is it? A delicious snack mix from India!

  You Will Need: Cayenne pepper, onion powder, ground turmeric, ground cumin, sugar, garlic powder, salt, packaged chow mein noodles, Rice Krispies (or other puffed rice cereal), mixed nuts or salted peanuts or cashews, cooking oil. Optional: Raisins.

  If you like to try new things, this is a really tasty recipe. Put a 1/4 cup of cooking oil on the bottom of a large frying pan and heat it on low. Once it gets warm, add all your spices:

  1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper

  1/4 teaspoon onion powder

  1/2 teaspoon ground turmeric

  1/2 teaspoon ground cumin

  1/2 teaspoon sugar

  1/4 teaspoon garlic powder

  1/4 teaspoon salt

  Stir them in while the oil gets hot. You may need to turn the heat up a tiny bit, but you will smell the spices cooking in the air. Once they’re blended in, take the pan off the heat and mix in 1 cup of chow mein noodles and 3 cups of Rice Krispies. Get everything coated in the spices. When the mixture is cooled, add 1 cup of nuts (and 1 cup of raisins if you want to try them). Mix them in and enjoy!

  This recipe makes about 6 cups of snack mix.

  Crème Brûlée (pronounced krem brool-lay)

  This is French for “burnt cream,” but don’t let that stop you!

  You Will Need: Sliced pieces of fresh fruit, plain yogurt, brown sugar, small bowls that can go in the oven (ramekins are good), a cookie sheet.

  Is this a dessert or a healthy snack? Answer: Both!

  First, turn your broiler on high. Then wash your fruit and slice it up; fill the bowls or ramekins you’re using about halfway up with them. Spoon yogurt into the bowl, filling it almost the rest of the way up. Finally, sprinkle a thick layer of brown sugar on top of the yogurt to cover the bowl.

  You’re almost done! Put the bowls on a cookie sheet and stick them into the oven for a little while. Keep an eye on them; once the brown sugar is all melted and caramelized, it’s time to pull the cookie sheet out. Turn off the oven and let the little crème brûlées cool. (We usually put them in the fridge for a while.) Then enjoy breaking through the caramel topping to the creamy goodness beneath.

  Special Cookie Section

  “I make the best oatmeal-raisin cookies in the world. Well, I don’t make them a lot because I don’t think it’s fair to the other cookies.”

  —Phoebe, from Friends

  The most famous cookies in the nation are probably Girl Scout cookies. There are about four million girls and adults in the Girl Scouts, and you’ve probably bought cookies from one of them. But do you know which Girl Scout cookie is their bestseller? (Make your guess and then check below) [13]

  Some places in the United States have laws that forbid selling food in public places without a license. So there have been times when Girl Scouts have been told to stop selling cookies. An Atlanta newspaper reported a case of 8-year-old Girl Scouts who were arrested for selling their cookies. Now that’s one tough arrest! (Or should we say, one tough cookie?)

  Chocolate chip cookies are probably the all-time favorite cookies. And they were only invented because of a happy accident! In 1930, a woman named Ruth Wakefield was working at the lodge she owned in Massachusetts called the Toll House Inn. One day she was making cookies and needed some baker’s chocolate. (Baker’s chocolate is unsweetened chocolate that completely melts when baked.)

  Ruth didn’t have any baker’s chocolate, so she experimented with a Nestle chocolate bar. She noticed that the chocolate didn’t melt all the way in the cookie; as a matter of fact, it held its shape pretty well! Although this wasn’t what she was shooting for, Ruth shared the “accident” with her guests. Toll House chocolate chip cookies were born!

  *The chocol
ate chip cookie is the “official state cookie” of Massachusetts and Pennsylvania.

  Strategy Tip: When you’re dunking your cookie in milk, one cookie in five will get too soggy and fall in! KIf you are dunking your cookie in something warm, like tea, coffee, or hot chocolate, the odds are even worse. To avoid this horrible disaster, research shows you should not put your cookie straight into the liquid you are dunking it in. Instead, tilt it at an angle, so that the cookie doesn’t get soggy at the same “break-off” point all the way across.

  Dieting

  “‘How long does getting thin take?’ Pooh asked anxiously.”

  —A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

  Some adults believe that girls are always starting a diet, already on a diet, finishing a diet, or wondering if they should go on a diet. We don’t believe that, but surveys do show that about 50 percent of all girls think they are overweight. (BTW, overweight means a person is carrying a few more pounds than she should. Obese means that someone is really overweight.)

  Should that many girls be worried about their weight? Well, 65 percent of adult Americans are overweight or obese. (They’re the ones who should be dieting!) As for the younger generation, 30 percent of kids in the United States are overweight or obese. The state with the lowest percentage of overweight girls is Utah; the state with the highest percentage of overweight girls is Mississippi.

  Prejudice! Studies show that kids between the ages of 5 to 9 have very negative attitudes toward overweight people. These kids dislike chubby people even more than they dislike bullies.