Living With Lies Trilogy (Books 1, 2, and 3 of The Dancing Moon Ranch Series)

by Watters, Patricia

  Jayne's mother shrugged. "Her adoptive mother left the name you put on her birth certificate. She goes by Becca."

  "When can I see her?" Jayne asked.

  "Today, if you want," her mother replied. "Lydia and Denny live in Seattle. We're going there now, if you want to come with us."

  Jayne stared at her mother, not knowing if she'd just been given an invitation to rejoin the family, or a ride to Seattle to solve a problem. Either way, she would be accompanying them. "I went by the house a couple of years ago and you'd moved," she said. "You must have bought the RV then."

  Her father nodded. "After waiting nine years, we decided you weren't coming back."

  Jayne looked at her father, surprised they'd waited all those years for her. "I actually went by a few other times too, but I didn't stop in because I didn't want to disrupt things."

  "Well, it's all past now," her father said, leaving Jayne to wonder if her past was past, or she was past. There was no question they harbored anger towards her, and rightly so. She'd put them through hell from the moment she introduced them to Vince, to the day she defied them and took off in the face of her father's final words, 'If you walk out of that door, don't come back.'

  But now, she'd be walking out of Sam's life, because she couldn't stay at the ranch. The last thing Sam needed was a woman with a prison record and a child.

  Her father, who was standing with his hand on the back of the chair that her mother was sitting in, said, "I want to get through Portland before rush hour. When can you leave?"

  "Right away," Jayne replied, "but I need to talk to... my boss first. He'll have to make arrangements with his mother to take over." When the front door opened, she looked across the room and saw Sam standing in the doorway. He caught her eye and started toward them, but she met him midway, and said in a hushed voice, "I need to talk to you in my office."

  Sam glanced beyond her, to where her parents were, and said, "Is there a problem? I saw the RV outside. We have spaces if the people want to stay."

  "They're not staying," Jayne said. "Those are my parents."

  "This sounds serious."

  "It is," Jayne replied, and headed for her office. Once behind the closed door, she turned to Sam, and said, "I have a child, a daughter. She's ten years old. I adopted her out when I was eighteen, and now her adoptive mother can't take care of her because she has MS. Since it was an open adoption, they asked if we could take her back. She's in Seattle with my sister and I'm going there with my parents. I'm sorry, but you'll have to find someone to take my place. I won't be coming back to stay, only to get my things."

  "Wait a minute," Sam said. "You can't just walk out like this."

  "I have no choice," Jayne replied. "I would never have taken the job if I'd known I'd be getting my daughter back. I won't turn my back on her a second time. I'm sorry. I should have told you something from the start, but I never thought I'd see her again. Now, I have to get my things together. My father wants to leave right away."

  "Look, we'll talk about this when you get back," Sam said. "When will that be?"

  Jayne shrugged. "I'll need to find an apartment and a job, so maybe sometime next week. You might as well run an ad for my position." She went to her bedroom, and Sam followed.

  "Okay, we'll talk about it when you get back," Sam said, as Jayne grabbed clothes from the drawers and piled them on the bed. "I'll need to know where you're staying tonight."

  Jayne looked at him. It seemed pointless to pass out addresses when her life at the ranch was over. "Why do you need my address?" she asked.

  "Hell, I don't know," Sam replied. "I just want it, okay?"

  "I guess. I'll get it from my parents." Jayne lifted clothes on hangers from the pole in the closet and flopped them on the bed, all the while trying to ignore Sam, who stood in the doorway saying nothing. Ignore the man who'd been dominating her mind and her life for three weeks. The man she'd made love with at the spring, and who wanted to marry her and take care of her, no matter what. And she was walking out of his life.

  Out of Sam's and Ricky's lives, she corrected. Sam still didn't have the whole story, and the part he didn't have was what would finally make him understand that Rebecca Hamilton was not a likely candidate for step-mother of Ricky Hansen. She was barely a candidate for mother of Becca Hamilton, but she would do right by her daughter. She'd been given a second chance, and this time she did have the choice to be her daughter's mother.

  CHAPTER 8

  Sam watched in disbelief as the big RV went barreling down the road, his mind still reeling from what Jayne had told him. She had a daughter she gave up for adoption, which explained her reaction to holding Grace's baby.

  I'll need to find an apartment and a job... run an ad for my position...

  And then she simply walked out of his life.

  But the tension between Jayne and her parents had been palpable. There seemed to be no affection for Jayne, almost as if she were a stranger to them, and Jayne offered him nothing, no explanation as to why she'd given up her daughter, no introduction to her parents, and she'd never mentioned having a younger sister.

  In his peripheral vision he saw someone walking toward him, and when he turned, he was annoyed to see it was Jack. He was definitely in no mood to go over this with him and then have to listen to Jack's sermon that would follow.

  "I saw the rig parked here earlier," Jack said, as he walked up. "How come they didn't stay?"

  Sam was tempted to tell Jack they were people passing through who enquired about the ranch and leave it at that, but he'd eventually have to explain to Jack and everyone else why the new guest ranch manager left. "That was Jayne's parents," he explained. "They came by for her. She'll be gone for a few days." Not an explanation Jack would accept.

  Which he didn't. "Maybe I'm missing something," Jack said, "but it was my understanding we hired a full-time manager. Working three weeks doesn't exactly entitle her to a vacation. You want to fill me in on something I might have missed?" He hooked his thumbs in his pockets and waited.

  "Not really," Sam said, "but I don't have much choice. Jayne has a ten-year-old daughter who needs her." He turned and headed for the winery, hoping to shake Jack.

  "You never mentioned anything about her having a daughter," Jack said, matching his long strides. When Sam didn't reply, Jack said, "You didn't know, did you?"

  "Not really," Sam said, wishing to hell Jack would go so he could sort through this on his own. Jayne leaving the ranch to take care of her daughter was one thing. Her leaving him altogether was another. Yet, her quitting the job was of minor concern—they'd gotten along without a guest ranch manager for years and they could do it again—but his life would never be the same without her, and that was the part he couldn't sort through.

  "And you were planning on marrying her," Jack stated, continuing to keep pace.

  "I still am," Sam replied, even though he hadn't figured out how he was going to pull that off. He didn't even know when he'd see her again.

  "How many more secrets do you suppose she's keeping?" Jack said. "Having a daughter isn't a small thing. Why didn't she tell you?"

  Sam stopped at the door to the winery and looked at his twin, and said, "Are you asking because you're curious, or because you think you'll have something to throw back at me for being the brainless cretin you accused me of being."

  Jack raised his hands in submission, palms out, fingers splayed and said, "Those are your words, not mine. I never accused you of being a brainless cretin."

  "Maybe not in those exact words," Sam said, "but yeah, you got your point across."

  Jack held Sam's steady gaze, and said, in all sincerity, "How about, I'm asking because you're my brother and I happen to give a damn about you."

  Sam drew in a long, mind-clearing breath, and said, "Okay then, she didn't tell me because she gave her daughter up for adoption at birth and never expected to see her again. It wasn't something she wanted to talk about because it was too painful for her. I'm sur
e Grace described Jayne's reaction when she held the baby."

  "Did she tell you why she gave her daughter up?" Jack asked, brow holding a puzzled frown.

  Sam shrugged. "No. It was ten years ago so she was a teen at the time. Maybe she couldn't take care of her."

  "This isn't a third-world country," Jack said. "A lot of unmarried teens keep their kids, and there are all kinds of government programs to help out. You might want to find out why before you rush into marrying her."

  "It wouldn't change things," Sam said. "You and I each made big mistakes with our first wives. Jayne probably made a big mistake with the father of her daughter and either didn't want to marry him, or he didn't want to marry her and she didn't feel up to raising her daughter alone and figured adopting her out would be the best thing to do for her."

  "Yeah, well, that's what you need to find out," Jack said. "Susan never wanted Ricky in the first place, and she gave up Marc because she didn't want him either, and we both know what kind of woman Susan is. And Lauren wouldn't breastfeed and ended up killing Jackie. When women give up their kids it's a bad sign, and you've got a son you need to think of first. Whoever you marry is going to be an instant mother. A woman who gave up her daughter might not be the best candidate."

  In the distance, Sam saw Susan's gray SUV and knew she was coming to pick up Ricky for the weekend. He was surprised she was early though. Usually she didn't arrive until after Ricky got home from school. The car came to a halt and the door shot open. Susan stepped out and glanced around, and catching sight of them, started towards them in long strides, arms swinging at her sides, face rigid, mouth planted in a firm slash.

  "This looks like trouble," Jack said.

  "Yeah, I was thinking that too," Sam replied.

  Susan's words directed at Sam preceded her. "I want to talk to you about what's going on around here," she called out, as she quickly closed the gap between them.

  "So, your bosom buddy must have reported back to you," Sam said, determined to stay on the offensive. "Now you're going to try to justify your screwing your stud by comparing it to my holding hands with a woman in a restaurant, but since you can't seem to stay out of your stud's bed, the least you can do is screw him when Ricky's not there. He knows exactly what's happening when you're getting it on in the bedroom."

  Susan didn't flinch at his harsh words. Instead, she planted her hands on her hips, looked at him steadily, and said, "At least my stud didn't spend five years in prison for driving a getaway car in an armed robbery like your bimbo did."

  Sam said nothing, too stunned to reply. Then things seemed to fall in place.

  Rebecca? I thought maybe it was you... Then you're doing okay now...

  "I see your girlfriend forgot to mention it," Susan said, "but if you have any doubts, you can check it out at the courthouse, or talk to Lauren. Your sweetie was in the women's state pen with her. Now, if you want to keep going on about me living with my stud, fine. I'll make an issue about your bimbo. Or we can stop right here and you can refer to the man I love as Ross, and I'll try to forget you're involved with a felon."

  When Sam still offered nothing, Jack said to Susan, "I think you're done here. You can either wait in your car for Ricky or come back later."

  Susan gave a little snort of derision, turned, and headed back to her car. When she was out of hearing range, Jack said, "I'm sorry, bud. You want me to check Jayne out? I can go to the courthouse and see if I can find out anything."

  Sam shrugged, then turned and went into the winery and sank into a chair angled at a small table. Jack pulled up a chair and sat with him. "Look, I'll do whatever you want. I'm not going to make things worse by pointing out the obvious."

  Sam looked up at Jack, and said, "So, what exactly is the obvious?"

  Jack squared his shoulders. "That I've been where you are right now. When I met Lauren, it was like I was blindsided by her looks, and when we ended up in bed the first night, all I could think of, 24/7, was being back in bed with her. It's an obsession with us, being with beautiful women like them. They shut our minds off to all logical reasoning."

  "Jayne's not anything like Lauren," Sam said, annoyed that Jack was again making that comparison. "She didn't smother her daughter, she gave her up for adoption, and she's torn up about it, even quitting her job to take care of her. She'll probably end up with a low-level job and living in a cheap apartment. But I do know one thing. She didn't give her daughter up because she wanted to. I just don't know why she did."

  "If she was in prison when she had her, that might explain it," Jack said.

  Sam stared at Jack. The prison thing again. It did answer a lot of questions.

  Jack braced his forearms on his knees, leaned toward Sam, and said, "Will you be honest with me, and with yourself, if I ask you something?"

  Sam shrugged. "That depends. What do you want to know?"

  "If you've seen any sign that Jayne might have been in prison. Maybe something wasn't right on her resume, or things didn't add up since she'd have some missing years to explain. And what's her connection with Lauren? You never mentioned that."

  Sam didn't want to go into the evening at dinner because it had been a night he'd wanted to give Jayne a ring, and had been prepared to, and the whole evening fell apart. But for the first time in weeks, Jack was not on his high horse. Jack actually cared. "Lauren waits tables at the restaurant where I took Jayne for dinner. She called Jayne Rebecca and asked if she was doing okay. And yeah, there were things not right on her resume, missing years. She might even have gotten an online degree while she was in prison."

  Jack placed his hand on Sam's arm, and said, "You don't routinely take my advice, but I'm going to give you some anyway because I know you've been through hell with Susan, just like I went through hell with Lauren, and I want to see you get your life back on track, so my advice is, wait for your Grace to come along. She's out there somewhere."

  "I'm not giving up Jayne," Sam said in a firm voice.

  "Just hear me out," Jack said. "These beautiful women look good on a man's arm, but for the long haul you need to find an ordinary woman. Grace is pretty, but she's no raving beauty, but no matter how rough a day I've had, when I walk through the door she kisses me like I've just come home from war, and that's after she's been dealing with kids all day. And when I see that smile of hers, it doesn't matter that the bull smashed the fence and got out, or my cowboys had been bad-tempered all day, I know my day will end with the woman I love in my arms. But you can't rush it. When you least expect it, your Grace will come along."

  Sam wanted to tell Jack that his Grace came along the day he interviewed Jayne, and when he made love to her he knew she was the woman he wanted for his wife. He just didn't know how to reconcile everything. Whatever compelled her to drive the getaway car in an armed robbery, if there was any truth to what Susan said, there had to be more to the story than just that. But to get Jack off his back, he said, "I'll keep it in mind."

  They'd been at odds so much lately he wanted to feel a little of the camaraderie they'd once had, but as in the past, it had always been women who pulled them apart.

  "Then, I guess we'd better advertise for another manager," Jack said. "This place is filled with guests, and Mom doesn't want to be tied down all summer. You want to take care of it, or do you want me to?"

  Sam shrugged. "I'll do it," he said, and left the winery for the lodge.

  ***

  It was dusk when Jayne and her parents arrived in Seattle, and dark by the time they pulled into the RV parking area of the apartment complex where Jayne's sister and her husband lived. Lydia had only been eleven the day Jayne walked out of her parent's house, and Jayne had no idea how Lydia would react on seeing her again. She'd have every right to be angry. Her big sister had not been there for her high school years, or to see her graduate, and she had not been there for her wedding, even though she'd been out of prison at the time. And it would be hard to explain that she'd felt the family was better off without her i
n their lives.

  And then there was Becca, the child she'd carried for nine months, and held for five minutes before she was taken away. Becca would also be there. More than anything, she wanted to rush up and hold the child she never thought she'd see again, but that would not be an option, at least not yet. Becca was separated from a mother she loved, and her adoptive grandmother turned her over to strangers, and now she was soon to see the mother who gave birth to her, then gave her up. Jayne could not begin to imagine how she'd feel in her daughter's place. But if she could have one wish right now, it would be to hold onto Sam's arm when she walked through the door.

  "Becca doesn't know you were in prison," Jayne's mother said, as they plodded up the stairs to the second floor of the apartment building. "We decided it would be best for her to get adjusted to us first and then tell her later."

  Jayne was surprised to hear this. They'd spent almost four hours in the RV on the way to Seattle, and although the ride had been tense, and the conversation strained, they'd managed to piece together the missing years. "I hope you mean by Becca getting adjusted to us, you mean getting adjusted to me," she said. "I have every intention of taking care of her now. I suppose there's an adoption procedure or something?"

  "Her adoptive mother is prepared to turn over legal guardianship to you pending adoption, if your father and I decide you're able to take care of Becca now," her mother said. "We had a long talk with Becca's grandmother, and we all came to that conclusion."

  "I hope you won't try to stop me from having her," Jayne said, and prayed it didn't sound like a challenge. But her mother and father had to understand that she would be taking Becca now, and no one was going to stop her.

  "Your father and I will discuss it later and let you know," Jayne's mother said, in a tone Jayne remembered well. "But you have to understand that many years have gone by in which we heard nothing from you. We even wondered if you were alive. You could have sent us a card to say you were okay. You also made no attempt to contact us after you got out of prison, even though it's been four years, and although you explained what happened, Becca's adoptive grandmother left to us the decision of whether to turn Becca over to you. If your father and I feel it's in Becca's best interest we will. If not, we'll raise her ourselves."