On A Prayer

by Mary May

  Klara interrupted him with a laugh. “Ok, ok, point made! My goodness you can tell all of that just by watching me breathe? That’s amazing.”

  He nodded toward a large red brick home with manicured lawns and a black Hummer and red Mercedes in the drive. “We’re here.” Klara looked at the beautiful home and was so happy for Matthew to have such a lovely place to live even it was temporary.

  “Ok, I hope you’re right. I hope he doesn’t blame me for his world being turned upside down.” She reached for the handle of the door when she felt Alec place his hand her arm.

  “Klara, do you trust me?” he asked. She nodded her head slowly, surprised to find that she did trust Alec. That was a major revelation for her. “I wouldn’t bring you here if I thought for one second that it wouldn’t go well for you.” Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves she smiled then opened the door.

  Alec took the lead, of course, but then he did something surprising. He reached back and took her hand and then he pushed the doorbell. She could hear it sounding throughout the house. A brunette in her early forties opened the door. She was very pretty and groomed within an inch of her life. Her hair and makeup were perfect, her clothes were perfect, even her teeth were perfectly white and even. Standing behind her was a man that was apparently formed from the same perfect mold. He was tall with dark hair just starting to gray at the temples. They were both very trim, tan and in great shape. Klara felt like a rag-a-muffin compared to them. Alec spoke first. “Mr. and Mrs. Walcott, I’m Alec Adams we spoke on the phone.” Mr. Walcott stuck out his hand and gripped Alec’s with a firm grip that was meant to be challenging, but Alec just smiled and squeezed a little harder. He had Walcott pegged the second he opened the door. He knew he would be a hand crusher to prove his manliness. “Oh, you must be the soup lady that Mattie has been talking about. It’s nice to meet you. I’m Braylie Walcott and this is my husband Stefan. Please come in.”

  Klara felt like a bag lady in her simple jeans and scooped neck cotton tshirt compared to Braylie’s designer short set. She nearly cringed when she was referred to as the “soup lady,” and did she call Matthew Mattie? Her earlier happiness was starting to nosedive just a little. She hoped it would improve once she got to spend time with Matthew.

  “Mattie, your guests are here!” Braylie called out from the foyer of the home. Klara heard slow steps coming from the other side of the house. They weren’t the excited running footsteps of a happy little boy, but the slow steps of someone that had no reason to expect anything good to be waiting for him. When he came into the foyer, Klara dropped to her knees and held out her arms. “Matthew!”

  When Matthew heard Mrs. Walcott announce his guests were here, he dreaded going in there. It was probably someone to ask him more questions about his dad or mom, so he was very surprised to see the nice lady that had been at his apartment standing there with a warm smile on her face. When she dropped to her knees and then held out her arms, it was all the encouragement that he needed! He raced to her and wrapped his arms around her, feeling the warmth of her embrace wrap tightly around him.

  “Oh, Matthew, I have been so worried! Are you ok?” Klara asked, as she looked him over quickly.

  Braylie laughed nervously. “Well, my goodness, of course he is alright; we would never harm a child. I was under the impression that you barely knew the child. It appears I was misinformed.”

  Alec spoke for Klara. “No, you were told correctly she had only met him twice before he was removed from the home. But sometimes twice is enough to form a bond when the right two people meet. Wouldn’t you agree?”

  Still smiling nervously and looking at her husband uncertainly, she replied, “Well, of course. Mattie, why don’t you go play and let us grown ups visit. All right, sugar?”

  Klara got to her feet so fast it looked like someone had pulled her up with a string tied to her head. “No! I mean I came here to see Matthew, to spend some time with him. I was hoping for at least an hour with him…please?”

  Stefan finally spoke. “Well, I don’t think it’s good to confuse the child right now by letting him become…attached to people that most likely won’t be a part of his life. We feel as his guardians that it would be best for Mattie to form bonds with us, wouldn’t you agree?” Then he smiled his fake brilliant white smile at her.

  Klara felt her blood pressure shoot through the roof. “Matthew. His name is Matthew, and, no, I don’t agree with you at all. Can a child really have too many people in his life to care about him? You were not given guardianship over him; he was placed in your home temporarily until other arrangements can be made. The way I see it, I have as much right to see him as you do, because you may not be a part of his life for very long either.”

  Alec held up a piece of paper. “And we have a court order to allow Mrs. Martin to spend at least three hours a week with Matthew until other arrangements have been made. They do not have to be supervised, which means we can take him on short trips into the city as long as he is back within the three hours. Here is your copy; you will find that it is all exactly as I have just stated to you. If you should have questions or concerns, please feel free to call Judge Harold Miles.”

  Within five minutes of showing the Walcott’s the court order they were back in Alec’s car with Matthew buckled snuggly in the back seat headed for the city park. Matthew had gotten very quiet when she had buckled him in, so she made a silly face at him to make him smile. That child broke her heart every time she saw him! They were at the park in just a few minutes. When she let Matthew out, he looked around uncertainly like he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. She knelt down. “Sweetheart, what’s the matter? Have you never been to a park before?” Matthew shook his head. Klara’s eyes met Alec’s over Matthew’s head and he looked as troubled as she felt. She smiled at him “Well, there is a first time for everything! Let us show you what a park is for. Umm, Alec you may want to lose the jacket and tie.”

  For the next hour or so they played. They showed him how to play on the merry go round and pushed him in the swings. They waited for him at the bottom of a giant slippery slide and for the first time Klara saw Matthew act like a normal five year old child. Alec had lost his tie and jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt. He played just as hard as Klara and Matthew did. He couldn’t remember the last time he had enjoyed himself so much! Klara absolutely came alive with Matthew and he with her. It was beautiful to watch.

  After playtime they took him to McDonalds and watched him enjoy a kids’ meal for the first time. The surprise in his eyes when he found the toy inside made a lump form in Alec’s throat that he had to swallow hard to get down. The three hours passed by too swiftly and before he knew it was time to take him back to the Walcott’s.

  Matthew’s bottom lip was trembling when they pulled up. “Can I please stay with you, Klara? I promise I’ll be good! I won’t cause any trouble! Please!”

  Klara got into the backseat with him and wrapped her arms around him. “Sweetie, if it was my decision to make I would let you stay with me forever. But unfortunately I can’t make that decision.” He sniffled into her shoulder. “But why not? Can Mr. Alec make them like he did with Mr. Walcott? Can he get another piece of paper that says to let me stay with you?”

  Klara looked to Alec and he just shook his head sadly. “I’m sorry, champ, but I can’t do anything about it today, but I’m working on it. I promise to try real hard to make that happen for you, ok?”

  Matthew nodded, “Ok.”

  Klara pulled back and smiled at him. “But hey! We have three hours every week to play and be together so let’s just think about that. The Walcott’s aren’t so bad, are they? You get a full tummy and toys to play with. Plus you have a nice big yard to run around in.”

  Matthew shook his head. “They won’t let me play in the yard. They said it costs too much money for the flowers and stuff and that I would mess it up.”

  Klara frowned in concern. “So what do you do all day?”


  He shrugged. “I watch TV. They have a lot of channels and a really big TV, so that’s nice.”

  Alec spoke up from the front seat. “Matthew, do they play with you or take you anywhere?”

  He shook his head again. “When I first came to live with them, they took me clothes shopping, but that was all. If they go out, I get a babysitter. Mrs. Brandt from across the street. She is nice but she smells like dirty socks.”

  Klara stared at Alec in disbelief! This was better than staying with her? Seriously? Alec nodded his head to let her know they needed to get Matthew back inside. With great reluctance she let him out of the car, holding his hand all the way to the front door. They didn’t get a chance to ring the doorbell. Braylie was waiting and opened the door as they were coming up the walk. “Mattie, go inside, sugar, and take a bath then put on clean clothes. You look like you rolled in dirt.”

  Klara stepped forward speaking through clenched teeth. “Matthew did roll in dirt, Braylie, and he ran and played and acted like a little boy! He isn’t a pet poodle that you can keep locked up in your house to parade around in front of your guests! Why do you even…”

  Alec took her arm and gently pulled her away from the door. “We will be here next week at the same time. You have a good night.” He then walked her back down the sidewalk and into his car. Klara was positively fuming! Oh, that woman! When Alec got in the car Klara exploded! “What do they want with children? Just answer me that! They don’t need a child; they need a robot dog because I would feel sorry for any living creature subject to their plastic, fake perfectly-molded life! I swear if she warps him somehow by calling him Mattie I’ll …I’ll… I don’t what I’ll do, but it won’t be nice or Christian-like! This is what the courts prefer to him living with me? That doesn’t make any sense. Who decided that they would be ‘suitable for placement’? She ranted using finger quotes. “Huh? Who? They were so fake that I bet they can’t stand next to a fire without fear of melting into a puddle of plastic goo. I cannot stand the thought of Matthew staying in that place, Alec, I really just can’t! Please do something! Please!”

  Alec felt the same way Klara did. He was going to do everything he could to get him out of there, but he still couldn’t see Matthew staying with Klara. But surely somewhere else would be more suitable. “I will talk to Judge Miles Monday and let him know that the Walcott’s really are not suitable for a small boy.”

  She looked at him suddenly as a thought occurred to her. “Alec, do you think I could talk with the Judge? Maybe if he actually spoke with me he would see that I’m ok and perfectly able to care for Matthew.”

  Alec looked over at her carefully. “I’ll arrange it, but only if you promise me you won’t get your hopes up too far. I still bet he won’t agree to it.”

  She looked back at him frowning. “Why? Why are you so sure that he wouldn’t let me keep Matthew?”

  Alec sighed when she asked him the question he had been dreading. She was not going to like his answer. “Because if it was my decision and all I was going on was the facts on paper, I wouldn’t agree to it either.”

  Klara felt herself go very cold and still inside. “So you don’t think I’m capable or reliable enough to care for him either?” She said quietly. That hurt her to a degree that she didn’t expect.

  Alec stopped the car and killed the engine. Then he turned in the seat to look at her. “Klara did you really listen to what I said?” he asked.

  “Yes, you said you wouldn’t let him live with me either.”

  He nodded. “Yes, I said if the facts on paper were all I had to go on. Which is all the judge has to go on. They don’t know you. You are just a name on a file to them.”

  He watched as she played with the seatbelt. “But, Alec, you know me; couldn’t you talk to them? I mean I would be better than Barbie and Ken any day of the week!”

  He felt his lips twitch at her comment. “I’ll see what I can do, but it may not help any.”

  Chapter 15

  Alec dropped Klara off after walking her up and checking her apartment. He left her strict instructions to be careful and to be aware of her surroundings at all times. But he didn’t feel any better leaving her there alone. He would move her to a secured apartment building with an armed guard if he thought she would let him, but he knew better. So he did what he could do. He called a private security firm and had a guard put on her without her permission. He knew he would catch hell on a whole new level if she found out, but better a mad Klara than a dead or hurt Klara. Next he put in a call to meet with Judge Miles next week. He would try to talk to him himself and see if he could get anywhere before bringing in Klara. That was if he still hadn’t located any family for the boy. He just couldn’t believe that the child didn’t have a single living relative anywhere. He would deepen his search.

  When he checked his messages he found one from his attorney saying that the date for the divorce hearing had been set for three weeks. Alec heaved a sigh of relief that it would be done in a relatively short time. Now if only Clarissa wouldn’t fight him on every single issue it would be done even more quickly. Thinking of Clarissa made him frown as he wondered what her game was. She had been suspiciously quiet the past few days, ever since he had his run-in with her over Klara being in the car. He hadn’t seen the dark sedan behind him either, come to think of it. That didn’t sit well with him at all. As a matter of fact it made him very uneasy. He knew her well enough to know she wasn’t done with him; she was only regrouping. He wasn’t surprised by much in life. He prided himself on being able to read people fairly well. But the change in Clarissa after he had announced his desire for a divorce did surprise him. He expected the anger, the tears then accusations and the blame. But this cold calculated side of her that taunted him daring him to do anything about her constant intrusion in his life, that surprised him. What he couldn’t get her to understand was the failure of their marriage wasn’t all on his shoulders. He had come home from the affair with every intention of making the marriage work. He was determined to see it through come hell or high water, but he couldn’t make her meet him halfway. He scoffed lightly. He would have been happy if she met him a quarter of the way, but she wouldn’t move at all on anything. For two years she raked him over the coals of his sins daily. He finally just couldn’t take it anymore. He really hoped that this sudden quiet time was her growing up and realizing that it was over and to just let him be. But he doubted it…

  Klara was speaking with her mother about her visit with Matthew. She told her that spending time with him today at the park had reminded her of Joshua’s first time on the slide and how he stopped himself halfway down and David had to climb up the slippery part to reach him. When he had almost gotten to Joshua, the toddler let go and they both went down the slide to land in a heap at the bottom. Klara had laughed until her sides ached at David’s surprised look when they landed. Her mother laughed with her as she told the story and Klara suddenly realized that she had told it and didn’t have that brutal gut-wrenching pain in her chest at the memory. She had enjoyed the memory with only a bittersweet ache in her heart. She told her mother about her progress.

  “Oh, sweetheart, that is so wonderful…I have been praying so hard that the Lord would take the pain away and leave you with the memories. He has heard my prayers! Thank you, Jesus!” They spoke for a few more minutes then hung up. Klara realized she had been rubbing the area over her heart since she had told the story to her mother. It really was a lot easier to think about them now. What had changed, she wondered? A few weeks ago she couldn’t take the pain any longer, but now?

  “Lord, I just want You to know that I’m still mad at You. But thank You for taking this pain away a little bit. Thank You that I can think about Josh and David without so much heartbreak. I know You heard my mother’s prayers. I guess while I’m speaking with You I should ask You to please watch over Matthew. Lord, I want to be selfish and ask You to please place him with me. But I’m going to ask that Your will be done in his life and p
lace him in the home that would be the very best for him. I don’t want You to think that we are back on speaking terms and that I’m going to be talking to You every day. Like I said, I’m still angry, so very angry with You. But I wanted to thank You for answering my mother’s prayer and to please… watch over Matthew.” She didn’t end with an Amen; that way it really wasn’t a prayer…not really.

  She finished cleaning up the apartment and finally decided to hang some pictures on the stark bare walls. She opened the first box she came to and ripped the tape off the top. Her wedding picture in a heavy silver frame looked up at her. She picked it up out the nest of packing peanuts and ran her hand over it to remove the packing dust. She looked so young, just a baby really, barely twenty-two years old. David looked so excited and proud. He held her close with his hand over hers that was lying on his chest over his heart. She had gone to sleep for five years listening to his heartbeat. That was one of the hardest things to get used to after he died, sleeping alone. She laid it aside then picked up another picture. This was when she was about seven months pregnant with Josh. David was on his knees talking to her bump. He was reciting the alphabet to him, because he read somewhere that babies could hear inside the womb if you spoke to them. Klara thought he was crazy, but when Josh was born the baby would turn his head every time his daddy would speak, so maybe there was something to it. If she ever had another baby, she would speak to it herself and see.

  That thought struck her hard. She had just made somewhat of a future plan. That was the first time she allowed herself to think further in the future than the next day. She smiled to herself thinking maybe there was a light at the end of her very long very dark tunnel after all. Scooter came in and batted at the packing peanuts that were scattered around the box. He really got into it, swiping his massive paws and sending the peanuts sliding across the floor then chasing them. Klara got on her knees and started tossing them into the air for him to chase. They played for ten minutes before he fell over on his side panting from his exertions. Shaking her head at him she bent down to pick up the mess when she heard a hissing noise whiz by her ear then the sound of breaking glass as the window shattered! She dropped to the floor looking around in panic when another bullet tore through her apartment. She tummy crawled her way to her bedroom where there weren’t any windows, dragging a growling Scooter along with her. She grabbed her cell and dialed Alec’s number with trembling fingers. She didn’t even wonder why he was the first person she thought of calling instead of the police.