Dark Requiem (The Darkling Trilogy, Book 3)

by A. D. Koboah

  She was silent, her gaze fixed on his wife and son, her expression one of visceral yearning.

  “I want to stay,” she whispered.

  Fear touched Akan like the cold hand of a corpse.

  “Goddess, we...”

  He was silenced by movement from the sleeping pair. Tanu awoke, twisting towards the sound of his father’s voice, waking Rutia in the process. Tanu stared ahead, his little face twisted with sleep and confusion for a few moments before his face fell slack and his eyes widened at the sight before him: the child goddess all but swallowed up by the dark robe, only her face visible.

  Rutia’s gaze was alert as she awoke and took in the two of them standing before her. Fear instantly flooded her eyes when she saw the divine one. She looked to Akan and then back at the celestial being, pulling Tanu to her.

  “Goddess, please,” Akan whispered.

  The divine one did not resist when he picked her up, for she already knew her desire to stay was a hopeless dream. She had seen the fear in Rutia’s eyes, the same fear she saw in the gazes of everyone who beheld her save Akan and Mutata. In Mutata’s face she saw a mask of acquiescence, behind which rage burned along with the desire to destroy.

  There were tears streaming down the child goddess’s face as Akan exited the house with her in his arms. He hurried away. The goddess kept her gaze on the receding house, intense longing in her eyes. Just before they drew out of sight of his home, Akan looked back to see Rutia standing outside the house, almost lost in shadow. He hurried on, not knowing what he would say to Rutia when he returned.

  The child goddess had ceased crying by the time they reached the temple.

  Jow said nothing when they returned, but the setting of her shoulders and the relaxed turn of her lips let Akan know she was relieved they had returned. The others seemed relieved too, the fear hanging around the temple having diminished slightly.

  When Akan placed the living idol on her feet, he knelt before her so he could peer into her eyes.

  “Goddess, if I could, I would not hesitate to take you with me and never return. But your destiny means you cannot live like a normal child. You are our goddess, the saviour of the Enwa people.”

  She merely stared at the floor for a few moments.

  “What is his name?” she asked.

  “Who?”

  “Your son.”

  “Tanu.”

  “I wish I was him, asleep in my mother’s arms instead of here and that I was just called Tanu instead of goddess.”

  “You will always be my goddess, not even the true goddess could make me forsake you. But if you want me to call you by your earthly name, then I shall. Do you remember your earthly name?”

  A weak smile came to her lips. “It is Alayai.”

  Akan rose to his feet.

  “Goodnight, Alayai, my goddess.”

  He left her, the silvery marks her tears had dried to still on her face. He returned home to the questions he was sure were waiting for him.

  Chapter 26

  The night before the exorcism, I was outside in the field of flowers with a notepad in my hand. The air was warm and fragrant with the sweet scent of Queen Anne’s lace, the sky a rich expanse of smouldering violet. It was another night when the world around me felt thin and transient as if I was only a breath away from shrugging off my body and leaving this world behind me. My thoughts were on the walled village and Alayai. I still could not reconcile the fact that the child I had been getting to know over the past few weeks was the evil entity that had slaughtered so many of my descendants. And I wondered whether or not I would be able to vanquish the spirit when I got to the chapel now I knew it had once been a child.

  Avery came out a while later and sat down beside me.

  When I faced him and found him staring at me, worry creasing his brow, I smiled at him although I knew it probably didn’t reach my eyes.

  “Don’t worry, Avery. I’m okay. I feel miles better now. Maybe my body is getting used to just vampire blood and I won’t get any weaker,” I lied.

  I looked away and up at the night sky. It was a few moments before I spoke again.

  “Avery, do you remember what Mary Holbert looked like?”

  “Mary? Of course.”

  The image was there in his mind for me to see. I almost gasped as her face unfolded before me, but I managed to suppress it. I also felt a surge of frustration when I remembered the many days and nights I had spent in the past wandering the streets searching for a face that would ignite a memory of Mary. It was all so senseless when the face I was desperate to see again—along with all I ever really wanted or needed in this world—had been waiting for me at the mansion. All I’d had to do was come to Avery. He would have never refused me something as small as this.

  I flipped open my notepad and began to sketch whilst Avery lay back and watched me. It was difficult to hold back tears as Mary’s smile, her gentle, amber-coloured eyes, the beautiful face of the woman who had cared for me when my mother was taken away, formed on the page.

  It was the face I’d had an image of so long ago in Central Park which let me know Alessandra was someone I could trust. I stared at it for a few long moments before I handed the notepad to Avery.

  “What do you think?”

  “As beautiful as she was in life,” he said with a smile. “You’re very talented.”

  “Thank you. I had to draw her as I couldn’t really picture her properly from Luna’s journal. She became Luna’s mother when Mama Akosua was taken from her, but although some of my family know about Luna and Mama Akosua, no one knows anything about Mary. She’s like so many slaves whose lives and struggles have been completely forgotten. This is just my way of remembering some of them.”

  He was staring intently at me now, his brow furrowed.

  “Don’t look at me like that, Avery. I’m not a complete airhead.”

  “I would never call you an airhead.”

  I smiled because despite how silly I sometimes was now, Avery didn’t see me as an airhead. He saw me as sweet and quite innocent. I was sure he was the only person in the entire world who saw me that way.

  The sound of the phone ringing tore his gaze away from me and toward the house. He ran inside to answer it. The shrill ringing cut off moments later and his voice drifted out to me as he spoke to the person on the other end.

  I continued to stare at the drawing of Mary.

  Before the memories, slavery had been something in a textbook I always thought was far removed from my life. I realised that, like whatever remained of Alayai in that chapel, its ghost had never really been laid to rest. I thought of the mistake I made shortly after Avery rescued me from slavery when I offered my body to him, believing it was the only thing of value I had. Two centuries later I was making the same mistakes, relying on my sexuality when I came to the mansion, still playing the role that had been forced on black females during slavery: That of the sexual temptress. It made me wonder what other ways in which I had let the echoes of slavery play out in my life both then and now.

  I sighed, frustrated with myself. It felt as if I had come so far yet taken practically no steps forward at all.

  My thoughts drifted to the exorcism that was almost upon us and the heaviness in my heart deepened. There was a very strong possibility I would not come back from that chapel. What would that mean for Avery? More years spent with only the ashes of our love, making his world a grey landscape that was completely without joy? And even if I did return from the chapel, there was nothing to suggest he would ever grow to love me as I was. I was just so very different now from the woman I used to be. I was young and silly, and if I was honest, I didn’t want to return to the way I used to be, burdened with rage and hatred that had been slowly eating me alive. But the woman he remembered is who he would want me to be.

  So where did this leave us?

  I had never understood how Avery could say he loved me and yet let me go to marry Jupiter. Seeing Avery in so much misery decades aft
er my death was allowing me to understand the sacrifice he had made. If I came back from the chapel, there was a chance I would have to walk away from Avery if it was what he needed.

  I stared up at the night sky for a few moments, tears filling my eyes. Death would be preferable to living on this Earth without my beloved.

  Deeply unhappy, I got to my feet. My head spun and the field of flowers swam before my eyes as I was overcome by that weakness. It passed fairly quickly, but I was left wondering how much longer my preternatural body would be able to survive without human blood. Would it be weeks or months before all its strength, along with life, finally left it? Clutching the drawing of Mary, I entered the mansion.

  ***

  Not long after dawn unfolded into a warm sunlit morning, I went downstairs to Avery’s study dressed in pyjamas. The mansion had a fretful stillness to it as Mallory had left with Shadrach just before dawn.

  Avery turned to face me when I entered, a smile coming to his lips.

  “Is everything okay, Dallas?”

  “Um, yeah. I just need to talk to you.”

  “Go on.”

  “I just...I just don’t know what’s going to happen tonight. Whether we’ll be able to banish this thing or if either of us will come back.”

  The smile disappeared and he frowned.

  “I want you to promise me something, Avery. I want you to promise me that if you do come back, you’ll start to live again. Forget...forget Luna, leave this mansion if you have to and live. Find someone and just be happy.”

  He was silent for a few moments as a dark cloud settled over his features. His voice was little more than a whisper when he spoke again.

  “Why would you say something like that?” He got to his feet. “And why are you talking as if you’re not coming back? Have you had more dreams? Tell me, Dallas.”

  “No, it’s nothing like that, I just...” Tears filled my eyes and I found I couldn’t speak.

  He pulled me to him and held me tight. I buried myself against him, inhaling his scent. It was just heaven to be this close to him, but all too soon he pulled away again. He stared at me, anxiety in his eyes. He brought his hand to cup my cheek.

  “Don’t worry about anything, Dallas. This will work, okay?”

  I nodded and without thinking about it, I reached up on tiptoe and kissed him.

  It was just a peck on the lips, something I used to do all the time in the past. The moment I realised what I had done I stepped away from him.

  He just stared at me, the colour draining from his face.

  “Oh, God! I...I’m so sorry, Avery. I didn’t mean to do that.”

  His gaze softened at my obvious distress. I went to move away and out of the study, but he caught my arm. Before I knew what was happening, I was in his arms and we were kissing.

  I let myself melt against him as his lips claimed mine, that heat engulfing us. I had waited so long for this, but I couldn’t let this happen. This was so unfair. I couldn’t do this to him when it was likely I wouldn’t be coming back from the chapel. And also without telling him I was Luna. I pulled away.

  For a few moments we just stood in silence staring at each other, that heat between us. His mind was closed to mine and his expression unreadable. After a few moments he spoke.

  “You should try and get some sleep, Dallas.”

  I nodded. He kissed me on the forehead. My arms came around him and then his lips were on mine once more.

  I gave in, remembering being in the dark, balancing on that gold wire and yearning for Avery’s touch. I let myself melt into his sweet, hungry kiss, butterflies fluttering in my stomach as the kiss grew more heated until I felt I was drowning in him. His other hand was caressing my neck, moving downward, his fingertips tracing delicious patterns of fire across my skin. When his hand reached the top button of my pyjama top, he plucked the top two buttons open and then his hand was on my breast. I moaned against his kiss, my body straining toward his touch.

  He abruptly released me and just stared at me. His lips were half open, his eyes aflame with desire whilst deep confusion fluttered behind them like swirls of snow threatening to extinguish the fire. He kissed me fiercely, his tongue exploring my mouth hungrily. I almost cried out when he pulled away again, but it was only so he could bring his lips to my neck. He ripped away the pyjama top along with my bra, and then his mouth was on my breasts. I gasped when his mouth closed around a nipple and shivered in response. When he pulled away, I pushed him down onto the floor, slipping out of my pyjama bottom. I kissed him and then tore at his T-shirt, nipping his neck and then moving down to his chest. I found the erect, tender nub of his nipple and tweaked, drawing a moan from him. I continued nibbling his chest, moving down to his stomach. I undid his belt and then his jeans, pulling them down. His huge erection was already straining against his underwear, but before I could touch it, he reached for my arm and turned me over so I was on my back. I laughed when he climbed on top of me, his hands at my wrists, keeping me pinned to the floor.

  He brought his lips down to mine, grazing his lips against them only to move out of reach. I strained against the hands at my wrists although I was enjoying being held captive by him too much to want to break out of his grasp. When he brought his lips down to mine again he let them linger in a slow, sultry kiss. He released my wrists and brought his hands to my breasts, causing me to moan against him. Then I felt his hands against my thighs, pulling them open. His lips were against my most tender place and I could only squeal in pleasure, barely able to utter his name as he drove me toward the peak. But just before I could reach it, he moved away. And then his lips were on mine again.

  When he entered me I cried out, wrapping my arms around him, moving to meet and draw his entire length into me. He began to thrust against me, long, slow thrusts to begin with only to quicken the pace, leaving me gasping. He brought me to just within reach of the peak again only to stop and begin the slow, delicious fire his touch elicited until I was aflame with ecstasy.

  Although his lovemaking was at times urgent, at some moments during those long daylight hours, he simply stared at me as if the sight of me was a dream he was scared he would wake from at any second. He trailed his fingers against my skin as if he could not believe skin that soft could exist. At times he buried his face in my neck, breasts or stomach, a slight tremor running through him. There was one moment when he kissed me and then pulled away to peer into my eyes. That confusion had come upon him again like a single cloud in an otherwise clear blue sky. He stared intently at me as if he was seeing through a veil to something that had been hidden from him before now. Panic seized me, and before it could be revealed to him, I grabbed him by the head and kissed him, drawing his thoughts away from anything but my lips against his.

  It was many hours before I finally climaxed, screaming his name. He lay against me for a few moments, his head buried in my neck, his hands still trailing against me.

  Luxuriating in the feel of my naked body entwined with his, I fell asleep in his arms as he stroked my hair and rained kisses on my face. I was exactly where I had longed to be ever since I walked out of this mansion over a century ago and into the night, away from all I would ever want or need in life.

  Chapter 27

  I awoke at sunset to find myself in Avery’s bed. He was not beside me. My skin was still tingling from his touch and I felt exhilaration when I thought back to those blissful daylight hours when our bodies had been as one. I took a moment to try and steady my thoughts. Then I put on one of Avery’s T-shirts and ventured downstairs to look for him.

  I found him standing outside in the field of flowers wearing just his jeans. The sky was a smoky violet and a thin strip of dark orange lay like thick mist over the horizon. I wanted to walk up to him, wrap my arms around him and rest my head against his bare back, but he knew I was there watching him. And there was something so forbidding about his posture I didn’t dare.

  I bit my lip, fighting back tears as I tried to decide how best t
o handle what had happened between us. Should I pretend nothing had taken place? Or perhaps this was a conversation that should be had once we returned from the chapel—if either of us made it back alive.

  It was a moment or two before I noticed that Avery’s mind, which was always locked tight to mine, bar the occasional stray thought, was open. He knew I was there, but he was letting me hear his thoughts.

  I grew as still as one of the four pillars at the front of the mansion as his thoughts washed over me, my heart a frantic stutter against my chest. Then a smile spread across my lips.

  Love. That’s what he was thinking of. Love. Deep, all-encompassing, unconditional love.

  For me.

  He had been in a dark, silent place for so long since Luna’s death and I had forced myself into his world and brought laughter, noise, light, more noise, irritation, noise, warmth and finally... Love.

  Just like Luna, I had entered his world and banished his pain, drawing him back into the land of the living. He loved me. Perhaps he always had.

  I stood there for a few moments, staring at his bare back as he watched the sunset. I couldn’t believe I had won Avery’s love. The tears I had previously been fighting slid down onto my cheeks, but they were tears of pure joy. I considered reacting to what he had just shared with grace, perhaps acknowledging it with only a simple kiss on his cheek.

  That just wasn’t my style.

  I leapt into the void and materialised before him. I threw my arms around his neck, making a smile break across his face.

  “Avery! You old dog. I knew you were fronting all along. I mean, who can look at all of this—” I used one hand to gesture from my head to my feet, “—and not fall madly in love?”

  “You knew, did you? That explains all the crying you’ve been doing since you got here.”

  He was staring down at me tenderly, love—pure love as nurturing as the night—in his eyes as he used a thumb to wipe away my tears.