Reaper Girl (Reaper Girl Chronicles Book 1)

by Erin Zarro

  Was the profound devastation I felt about Rick's state of being...love? Remorse? Pain of losing a loved one?

  Um...maybe I did love him after all.

  I turned to His Highness. "Do it. Make me a Reanimate."

  "Very well," His Highness said. "Rick, I will make you corporeal and Leliel will return your soul to you. Leliel, you will then became a Reanimate in place of Rick."

  "No, I won't do this!" Rick cried. His words echoed around us. "I can't do this to her! There has to be another way!"

  "Rick." I spun around to face him – approximately where I felt he was, anyway. "You, of all people, do not need to feel guilt over this. I'm making a choice here to save your butt. Which, by the way, was quite the adventure. Please, just stay out of this!"

  Getting mad made it easier to not think about loving him. About the future we could never have.

  "As you wish, Reaper Girl," His Highness said.

  A crack of lightning split the heavy silence.

  Suddenly, Rick appeared in his true, human form. With cheeks wet with tears. He stepped toward me, hands reaching. "Leliel, please – "

  I ignored him. "Now?" I asked His Highness.

  "Proceed," he replied. He wasn't smiling. Normally, he'd take great pleasure in these types of things. I figured he had a heart after all.

  I stepped up to Rick, who grabbed my shoulders. "Leliel, will you listen to me?"

  "No," I said, and kissed him. I released his soul to fill his body, stretching and settling, pure and true and right.

  His tongue sought entrance, and I parted my lips for a second. His kiss lit me up inside, sent shivers up and down my spine and everywhere else. It was amazing.

  With a moan, I pulled away. Someone had to end this.

  "Leliel," Rick murmured, his eyes smoldering.

  I turned back to His Highness. "Okay, his soul is back in him where it belongs." I drew in a deep breath, rounding my shoulders, trying to mentally prepare myself for the next thing. But how do you mentally prepare for going blind and then becoming incorporeal? It wasn't like they gave out manuals for this type of thing. So that just wasn't happening.

  "So, let's get this party started," I said, trying to sound cheery. Yeah, right.

  "Can I at least say goodbye?" Rick asked.

  His Highness swept his hand in my direction with a flourish. "Go right ahead. But be quick."

  "Thank you," Rick said. He came to me, cupping my face gently in his hands. "I can finally see you, Leliel. You're so beautiful. And feisty. And amazing."

  "So amazing I'm about to become something other than...what I am," I said softly. "For what it's worth, you've given me some amazing memories. I'll never forget you, Rick."

  He looked right into my eyes, right into my soul. Something stirred there, something real. "I'm gonna find a way to save you. Believe me. It's gonna happen. Don't ever forget, okay?"

  I shook my head. "There's no use. No one can save me. Just let me go. Move on, live your life. That's why I'm doing this. To give you your life back."

  I glanced at His Highness, begging him with my eyes – which were filled with freaking tears – to get this done before I had a meltdown. I'd been doing fine until now. Now, I was beginning to feel the unbearable agony of what I'd done.

  And being incorporeal was the least of it.

  I pulled myself away from Rick, yet again, and gestured for His Highness to come to me. "I'm done here. Can we do this, please?"

  "Believe," Rick said. "Just...believe."

  "Okay, whatever," I said. There was no hope for us. No point in torturing myself more.

  "All right, Leliel...this will only hurt for a second." His Highness put his hand over my head and heat washed through me, like a tidal wave of fire.

  I went to my knees, panting from the pain.

  Hellfire, what was he doing? Killing me? Doing a fine job of it.

  And then it abruptly stopped.

  I nearly fell to the ground in sheer relief.

  Instead, I stood as carefully as I could. Everything felt so light, so insubstantial.

  I lifted my arm.

  And I was...translucent. A ghost.

  Sometime later, I became aware of two things: Rick's voice. And my body fading more and more.

  "Leliel, baby..."

  "Leliel, calm yourself," the Master said. "I'm sorry you're in pain – "

  "It's not physical pain, you moron!" I said, wanting desperately to smash my hands into the floor, the wall, his head. But I couldn't do that because I could no longer feel my surroundings. It was like being in a bubble, looking outward but not being able to do anything.

  And that was what freaked me the hell out.

  "Leliel, it's okay," Rick said in a soothing voice. He was actually holding me, but I couldn't freaking feel it. "I'm gonna fix this. I promise."

  "With what, exactly?" I asked. "What's done is done."

  "I won't let you fade," Rick said, his jaw set, his eyes determined. "I want to stop this from happening. I just don't know how."

  "There's no way," I said as gently as I could. "I will eventually be as you were before."

  "But you're not yet," Rick countered. His eyes lit with an inner light. So pretty. Must memorize them before I go blind. "That means there is time."

  I didn't know what to say to that, so I kept my trap shut.

  "I believe we are done here," His Highness said. "Leliel, I thank you for your service and wish you well."

  I kept the sarcastic parting shot to myself. After all, it was all my fault.

  But it still felt like the world was ending.

  And Rick...

  He was still holding me. I tried to push him away, but I couldn't. "Don't bother. I can't feel it."

  The hellcat brushed up against my legs, whining. I couldn't feel it.

  Rick frowned. "I still want to comfort you. Is that so wrong?"

  I shrugged. What did it matter? Did anything matter anymore? "I guess not. You look amazing, by the way." I forced myself to smile. He did look great. Better than I'd ever seen him. His eyes were vibrant again, filled with life. It was beautiful.

  "Why thank you," Rick said with a grin. "I feel great."

  "I guess I'll be on my way then," I said, trying once again to get Rick's hands off of me. I wanted to feel them, his skin on my skin. The little butterflies that fluttered in my stomach. Shivers rolling through me at his touch. His lips on mine.

  "I'm going to fix this," Rick said. "Remember? No one leaves."

  Yeah, I remembered. "That doesn't apply to this, Rick. We're done here." Ye Gods, he was going to break my heart if I stayed here long enough.

  Had to get away. Now.

  I turned to leave, but something brushed my shoulder.

  What the hell?

  I spun around.

  "I think I know how to fix you," Rick said. "When you touched me before, I went corporeal for a second. That's because I was thinking of you."

  I just stared at him.

  "I'm trying to fill myself with memories of you. When I think about you, it's like my soul expands. It's like it's...trying to touch yours."

  "But I don't have one anymore," I said.

  Rick nodded, his lips quirked upward. "That's exactly it, Leliel. My soul wants to...I don't know how to explain it...split in half? Fill you and me."

  "That's not possible," His Highness said as he came toward us. "You can't share a soul. It's never been done."

  Rick's eyes danced. "Just because it's never been done doesn't mean it can't be done, Your Highness. We're connected at the soul level. When I was drowning, it was our connection that kept me alive. And apparently we're bonding so...who's to say it can't be done?"

  "You two are a special case," the Master said. "I think it could be possible."

  "But I'd need a full soul, right, not half a soul?" I asked. I didn't dare hope. It was too fragile, and I was already on the edge of insanity. If I hoped for this...and it wasn't possible...I would never come back from it.<
br />
  I'd lose my mind, roaming the earth topside with no anchor, no purpose, and no future.

  "Let me try again." Rick reached out his hand, so beautifully alive, and touched my shoulder. White light flared, then dimmed.

  I felt nothing.

  I turned away. "It's no use. It'll be best if you moved on." I met his gaze. "Go live your life. There's nothing here for you." I gestured to the Master. "I'm sure he can help you get out of here in one piece."

  Rick folded his arms across his chest, glaring down at me. "I'm. Not. Leaving. Not without you."

  The hellcat sat down in front of me, her eyes almost human, defiant.

  Was he serious? "Rick, you can't just stay here! There are traps! And monsters! We almost died – or worse – several times! It's safer topside and you know it!" I wanted to hit him. Shake some sense into him. Make him understand. My hands clenched in fists. And I said the one thing I shouldn't have said. "What if being reminded of what we can't have is too painful? What if I can't freaking bear it?"

  Just then, I faded more. I could barely see the outlines of my body. Hellfire.

  It was happening too damn fast.

  "Help me," I whispered. To hell with dignity and being brave. I wasn't going to survive this.

  And the worst part? I couldn't take my own life.

  The hellcat meowed, sensing my distress. I wanted to pet her, feel her warmth.

  "Oh, Leliel." Rick put his arms around me again. I couldn't feel them. And not feeling them and wanting to killed something inside me. It was an avalanche of emotion – once I let a bit loose, more and more snowballed into something so huge –

  Tears fell down my cheeks. I didn't care anymore.

  "Leliel, please," the Master said. "You must stay calm – "

  "You're not the one turning into nothing!" I screamed, hitting Rick with my fists. Repeatedly. For all the good they could do. But it felt good to get it out.

  "I'm sorry, Reaper Girl," the Master murmured. "I wanted more for you."

  "Well, so did I," I snapped, still hitting Rick. "I wanted more than I deserved. That's just the way things have to be, I guess."

  "Leliel, Leliel, Leliel," Rick murmured. "How I love you. How I wish things could be different."

  "Me, too," I whispered. "Me, too."

  I don't know how long we stood there, Rick holding me, me hitting him and crying. The Master and His Highness bearing silent witness. No one tried to get rid of me; no one even spoke as I cried and cried, the avalanche an unending thing that threatened to bury me.

  Yeah, as if.

  But it felt so real.

  I must have fallen asleep or something because I suddenly could feel...rain? On my face and in my hair, raindrops.

  But I shouldn't have been able to feel them.

  They were warm. Not cold.

  I lifted my head. Met Rick's beautiful eyes. And noticed his face damp with tears.

  He was crying? And I could feel his tears?

  I looked down and gasped.

  I had my body back!

  Then I felt Rick's arms holding me close. His fingers making circles on my back. His cheek pressed to mine.

  His hair whispering against my shoulder.

  And...his tears.

  And the hellcat's head butting against my shin.

  "It's a miracle," the Master said. "How did this happen?"

  Rick drew away from me, but I pulled him closer. Anything to feel him again.

  "Like I said, I filled myself with memories of you, Leliel. Until I was almost bursting with them. I began to cry. And next thing I knew, you were back."

  I understood. "Your soul filled your tears, and when they mingled with mine, they brought me back. You brought me back!"

  We embraced, and Rick kissed me, slowly and with so much passion it was scandalous. But I didn't care.

  Happiness burst out of me. I hadn't been this happy in forever.

  It felt awesome. And right.

  "Leliel, I have something to tell you." His Highness came to stand in front of Rick and me. My heart raced. Was it bad news?

  "What's going on, Your Highness?" Rick asked, drawing me closer to him.

  "You are a special case indeed," His Highness said. "Somehow, I don't know how – you're fully human, Leliel. Not a Grim Reaper."

  Hellfire.

  "Which means," the Master said, looking solemn, "that you're no longer immortal. You will most likely live this life and no more. I'm sorry."

  I laughed. "You're sorry? Hell, I'm happy to be human. I never enjoyed reaping. Not like the others." I looked up into Rick's eyes. "I have everything I need right here. We'll live an amazing life together. And that's just what I want. Nothing else. Immortality just doesn't live up to a full, amazing life with the man you love."

  So I was no longer the Reaper Girl.

  I was just me.

  The hellcat meowed, and I remembered that we hadn't named her yet. I scooped her up into my arms and hugged her close to me. "Rick, we still need to name this little, very lethal, furball."

  Rick's eyes widened. "Oh, yeah. I had an idea."

  "What is it?" I asked as I stroked my fingers down the hellcat's back. She purred, a little motor beneath my hand.

  "I would like to call her Love," Rick said, catching my gaze. "Because love is what brought us together, and it's love that saved us both. What do you think?"

  I grinned. "It's perfect."

  "You're perfect," Rick said, pressing his lips to my brow. He petted Love, hugging us both close.

  So that's how we became a family: Rick, the guy who didn't die; me, the Reaper Girl turned human; and Love, the first hellcat in Underworld history to purr. And love.

  Love made everything better.

  If you enjoyed this story, you'll love Under Her Protection: Stories of Women to the Rescue, edited by Siri Paulson.

  The stories include:

  Reaper Girl, about a grim reaper and a dead man, by Erin Zarro

  Guardian, about a swordswoman and a scholar, by KD Sarge

  The Raja and the Madman, about a maidservant and an inventor, by Siri Paulson

  Drifting, about a new university grad and a prince, by Kit Campbell

  Check it out here: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/461759

  For more information about Turtleduck Press, go here: http://www.turtleduckpress.com

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Erin Zarro is a poet and novelist living in Michigan. She is the granddaughter of a poet and newspaper columnist, so writing has always been in her blood. She is married to a wonderful man and they have a cat, Hailey, who is part vampire.

  To pay the bills, she works as an office manager for a small marketing firm. In her spare time (what's that?), she writes madly. She also enjoys photography, music, website design, and, of course, reading!

  Erin says she is terribly hard to scare, loves a damn good story, and wants to be a full time novelist when she grows up. She self-published her first novel, Fey Touched, through Turtleduck Press in 2012. She recently released book #2, Grave Touched. Currently she is hard at work on book #3, Ever Touched, as well as a few other projects, and trying to stay out of trouble. Mostly.

  AUTHOR'S NOTE

  Thank you for taking the time to read Reaper Girl. This novella was a joy to write. Look for more of Leliel's and Rick's adventures soon! The story is not over yet!

  If you enjoyed this novella, please spread the word about it and Under Her Protection. Indie writers such as myself need the exposure desperately. You will have my undying gratitude. :)

  Author website: http://www.erinzarro.com

  Turtleduck Press: http://www.turtleduckpress.com

  Want to know the minute I release a new book? Sign up for my newsletter at: http://eepurl.com/bjsKaL

 

 

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