Shimmers & Shrouds (Abstruse)

by Brukett, Scarlett

  I finally exhaled and closed my eyes. This pondering over the negatives helped. It was better not to argue on the part that would not be considered a reality. My heart felt lighter for the first time since he left. In a lesser time than I’d expected, the night closed on me.

  Orpheus

  When I woke up, I was still feeling sad about last night. I sighed and turned over to my side. Mrs. Norrington had pulled over the heavy curtains already and it was way too sunny to go back to sleep.

  "Good morning Mr. Albert." A husky voice thundered through the silent room, echoing like it always did.

  I sat upright, completely unwilling to gather my strength, because I was not in any case intending to get up so early.

  "Good morning Mr. Sunross. Your voice kills my sleep." I grinned at him. My voice didn’t betray me. It sounded like I hadn’t slept a wink.

  "You seem to be in a good mood, sir." His elderly face lightened to see me smiling after a long time. I was surprised too. I usually avoided visiting the mansion because of some unpleasant memories that I had here, and the last time that I’d smiled this wide was at the news of my military training.

  I abruptly smiled at his boldness. This bald old man who was perfectly dressed in his usual uniform was my only comforter.

  "I wonder how you get up so early Mr. Sunross."

  "It’s a habit sir. And old habits are hard to quit." He handed it over to me.

  "I wonder." I muttered under my breath as I finished my tea.

  "Would you like to have your breakfast, sir, or are you going to skip it again?" He took the cup from me and placed it on the tray.

  "I will have it. It’s an important start of the day." I smiled. My words sounded stupid. "Also Mr. Sunross it would be very nice of you to have my reventon ready. I think I need to go out for a ride or something." I blinked my eye like a little child. He smiled and nodded at once.

  "And Mr Sunross―" I called him again. He was almost out of the room. He turned to look at me. “ MEDIA, "I emphasized, “is the last thing I am expecting. Let this be strictly confidential." I warned.

  I jumped up from my bed and rummaged with the clothes of my wardrobe to find a perfect outfit that would make me look more like a college going guy or maybe a guy who looked like he had failed to clear the last semester nearly a hundred times. I tried not to dwell on that. I ended up selecting a Rebok T-shirt and rag blue jeans along with a jacket. That would make me look normal, I convinced myself.

  I checked the case of watches. I was sick and tired of not resisting my habit to wear these. For today, I definitely needed something casual. And luckily, I had a few watches to support my look. Anyway who was going to get out of the car.?

  I quickly placed my dress and the accessories on the bed and ran to the washroom to get fresh. Before I met Oceana, I had totally different concepts of being ‘typical’. During deployments I watched my friends getting up in the morning and exercising. The schedule included breakfast, duty etc etc and there was nothing like bathing in it. But after yesterday, I couldn’t help but take bath, not once but twenty times if she wanted me to. It was a surprise for even me to realize how influenced I was by her. We had met just once and the effect she had on me from that moment was something that I’d experienced for the first time in my life. Or was I actually being tamed by a nineteen year old college going girl who had big caramel coloured eyes, big black curls, perfectly carved out pink lips and a voice melodious than a cuckoo? Wait! What am I thinking?

  I tried to focus my mind on thinking and deciding what I might want to do after I would be done with stalking her all the back to her home. With the list of those stuffs ready in my mind, I dressed up as quickly as I could and looked myself in the mirror. Not bad, I was looking like someone who had dropped out of the college and joined in after many years. I sighed and hurried down the flight of stairs to make my way to the dining hall, stumbling over my shoes, twice.

  I managed to land safely on my chair. Gran was already there, so it was nothing like wasting a single second further. As soon as we finished with the prayer, I swallowed the lasagne in two bites, taking two immediate sips of my orange juice like I was hungry since ages. Every body stared at me when I was done with my breakfast because the rest of them hadn’t even started. It certainly looked like they were taken aback by my haste.

  "Any reason why you are acting like a barbaric dacoit today, son?" Grandma asked me, her voice strained.

  I shifted my eyes on her. She had placed the cutleries back in their place and intertwined her fingers her expressions were grave.

  "Umm―" I got up very slowly, looking sideways and bent low to have an appropriate eye contact.

  "Later gran...” I kissed her on the forehead and left the place without caring to bid a proper farewell to my father and my step mother.

  Thank god I had Reventon today. I reached her college in not more than twenty minutes despite the rough traffic. I was grateful that my car was not the only expensive car standing in the parking lot. There was another Lamborghini, hot red in colour, parked right next to mine, and a Bugati, parked two cars down. I ducked low in my seat, trying to be invisible. My eyes were searching her eagerly. I was hoping just a glimpse of her but it wasn’t that easy to spot her among so many students of her age.

  I was on the verge of losing hope when a beautiful radiant face at the side of the corridor surrounded by probably twelve or thirteen people caught my eye. It was her. Smiling and greeting the students who had crowded around her. It was so easy for anyone to fall in love with her. She was just like them. Happy, easy to read, less complicated, but yet so different from any other girl I had ever met. Everything except her had blurred out and I could only see her. So beautiful yet so guarded, so shy yet so frank.

  My phone was the only thing that wasn’t kept away in an appropriate state so I could admire her without getting distracted. It’s more-than-loud ringtone panicked me all of a sudden. I quickly picked it up to see who the caller was, and the name that flashed on the screen was the last person I was expecting to call―the very last person on this earth indeed. My panic was so genuine that I had to compose myself before she could understand the edge of excitement. I didn’t want my plan to ruin just because I couldn’t keep cool. I finally picked up the phone.

  "Hey." I tried to keep my voice casual.

  "Hi? It’s been four days you haven’t called nor did you text. Is everything fine with you over there?" She sounded concerned.

  "I was a bit... Occupied. And it’s been just four days Diane." I sighed.

  "Four long days Orpheus. I was worried for you, honey." She melted like wax.

  "I am all okay sweet heart." I hated the sound of this word though it was my favorite until yesterday. Now my new favorite word was Oceana.

  "Nice to know." She breathed "Orpheus." She lowered her voice trying to seduce me perhaps. "I was wondering if you could catch me up for dinner, and then it’s going to be just you and me all night."

  My words were stuck in my throat. I couldn’t speak. I noticed I was breathing evenly. Her trick hadn’t work on me this time. I knew it wasn’t tough to say I wasn’t interested in a night out with her. I just needed some courage to confess and ask if there was even one single moment when she could resist me, because I was definitely finding her concern unnecessary.

  "I am sorry Diane. But I think I'd better stay back and give myself some time. You know how hard it is to avoid the media in restaurants." I lied. I was not a kind to be able to lie so easily, but this was very convincing. I was pleased with myself.

  "Okay then, may be some other time." I could hear the disappointment in her voice.

  “Bye Diane." I hung up.

  I was doing it again. I was playing with her emotions just like I played with everyone else's. Just like I would play with Oceana's feelings if we were going to be friends, or more. It was all because I was way too unclear about what I really wanted the most. I couldn’t help but put away the thought of hurting her. I wouldn’
t be able to live myself for even a single micro second if I ever did that.

  I looked up to see if she was still standing there. The entire campus was deserted with just one person who was looking straight into my direction. My mind was dazed all of a sudden― like a thousand arrows had struck me at once. Like a billion bullets had pierced through me. My dazzled mind tried to focus hard on the face. Even from a distance of a hundred and fifty yards or something, her face was as radiant as the first time I'd seen her. My eyes scanned her drop dead gorgeous body that stunned me as the first time it did. I could feel nothing, hear nothing. Her presence had made it impossible to think or concentrate. I could feel the blood rushing through my veins. My chest was beating extraordinarily loud. If seeing her gave me such goose bumps, I wondered how amazing it would be to touch her, again. Maybe it was better to admit the reality this way. The fact that was going to remain unbeatably strong was that she could be with anyone else, every handsome guy that really existed, like someone from her college, her class or something. Someone she was able to and could trust easily enough. I exhaled. The thought of losing her itself was too scary. I couldn’t even consider it. What was this strange sensation… grief? For what? I didn’t even make friends with her properly so there was simply no way I could be sitting here and thinking of the consequences of losing something I never really had.

  When I looked up to the place where she stood, she was nowhere to be seen. I was so engrossed in her thoughts that I couldn't differentiate between my imagination and the actual reality. Maybe she wasn’t even there. Maybe I was figuring all of it. I was so confused. I couldn’t think of an excuse of why I was actually here. She wasn’t so attractive to make me take the risk of confronting the reporters if I got caught, that too when I didn’t want to. Why was I ready to take my chances? What would prompt such an act of love?

  Of course she was different, but she was a human after all. Not a giant magnet to have me running towards her. Half of the world's population is female, and all the rich beautiful girls were practically dying to date me, then why on earth was I stalking this brunette foreigner? What was so inviting about her?

  What if she was right about her being different from other girls I met?

  The only rational way I could think of was to stay away from her, like every other guy would do. She was not my type. In fact I was not her type. Even if I supposed that she was interested in me, like any other girl would be, should be. It mustn’t really create a great difference to me anyway. It was because, apart from great difference in our interests, she was almost eleven years younger to me. Too young to understand the torments and typhoons of emotions my heart went through. So, do I have an answer now? Should I ignore her as hard as I can and never mention anything about her to gran? Should I stop noticing the qualities which outweighed her from the other girls, and to be direct, forget about her as if she had never existed?

  O fcourse. I can do nothing better can I?

  But then why did I dream of her last night if we were meant to stay away? What could the dream possibly mean? It couldn’t be anything about the past; I have known her for just two days.

  I had dreamt of us together. Her delicate body, the skin, softer than the cream, covered with a bed sheet exposing her legs and arms. She slept soundly, holding my hand, just like a little kid. I could still hear her even breathing next to my ear, easing away my tiredness. Her black curls were softly kissing her lips when they were swayed occasionally by the breeze. I couldn’t understand why I dreamt this way if we weren't meant to be together. I was sure it couldn’t be a figment of my imagination; I wasn’t day dreaming― still, this was the most beautiful dream that had ever occurred to me. I was already in too deep, I couldn’t back off by now. It was too late to turn back.

  I growled at myself, infuriated for not yet deciding about the thing I wanted the most in this world.

  I started the engine and turned the stereo on until it hurt my ears. The sun was high up in the sky by now. I pulled out through the traffic to make my way to my destination. At last there was one thing I was clear about, for sure.

  I was in the kitchen making food for her. It was an Indian cuisine and I had gotten some help from the butlers and the internet as well. I was roasting a thin round thing I found in the rack when I heard the door open. I eagerly waited for her to come in and see my surprise; there was too much spice in the air to resist the temptation to hover on the food. But she took more than necessary time to come. I decided to go and check what was taking her so long. As I came out of the kitchen I was terrified to see her holding the iron rod right above her head, ready to charge at me. It made me scream, and luckily, she stopped halfway, realizing that it was me.

  "What the hell do you think you were doing?" I demanded, breathlessly, still terrified.

  "How would I know it was you in the kitchen? You could have called me." She said, wide eyed.

  "You should know, it is too easy. Who else knows that you keep your keys under the eaves? Stupid."

  "I am sorry, what?"

  I breathed in heavily, reminding myself that I was not here to have any sort of argument with her. She was right, after all it was her home and I shouldn't have just walked in with such authority.

  "I am sorry." I couldn't manage to look at her, I was ashamed at myself.

  "It's fine Orpheus! Call me the next time you want to come. I won't attack you." she promised. “Anyway I could smell there is something delicious waiting to be eaten." She smiled. Finally sniffing the aroma.

  “You're hungry?" I smiled smugly.

  "I am a monster right now." She moved me aside to check the messy kitchen.

  "You're a mess! Look what you've done!" She looked at me and the platform in horror. Yes, these eyes were the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen.

  "I'll clean it up ma'am. You should sit and have lunch." I grimaced.

  "I served her the food. It was a three course meal. The main course had rice, mushroom curry and salad. Very decent. I was not in the mood to eat but she persuaded me to have it with her and I couldn’t say no.

  She told me about her friends and she took some of the names so often, I thought I had memorized them by now.

  She continued Having her meal and I focused on my food. Why did it feel like I fell in love with her all over again whenever I saw her. This feeling was completely new to me. I had affairs with many beautiful and gorgeous girls but this had never happened with me.

  And I was sure it would never happen with me.

  After we had our food,I washed the dishes myself and forced her to go out of the kitchen. She reluctantly followed my instructions.

  Here in this apartment, there was nothing that could make me believe that I was different from any of my army friends. I made food for my ― friend, washed dishes, all of them by myself, and then sat infront of the T.V to watch the sitcoms which were aired. It was just the way every normal, non-billionaire friend of mine would do when they got home. I had a bonus though, a beautiful girl with brain of the Einstein would look at me sometimes and her short timed stare would chill me up the bones.

  She was busy doing the homework I suppose. I continued watching T.V but something in her persuaded me to look at her from the corner of my eye. Such a supple skin, such a beautiful body she had. She was absolutely amazing in every way.

  "Oceana?" I called her, muting the volume of T.V. She looked up unknowingly, a response which was reflex. Her thoughts had taken her somewhere else.

  “Hmm?" Now this was something I would have to get used to. I’d always been answered differently. This 'hmm?' thing was absolutely new in the chart.

  I smiled and looked away for a moment and then back at her, “Do you have a boyfriend?"

  "No." she looked down at the work she was doing.

  "Did you have one?" My curiosity could end our friendship relationship but it was just curiosity, I explained myself. I was just plain curious to know why this ― magnificently beautiful girl avoided dating? There had to be
some very valid reasons behind this.

  She looked away with disapproval, closing her eyes slowly, perhaps calculating the chances of her avoiding my questions.

  I couldn't help but chuckle.

  “I’ve had many, back in my school years.” She sighed. "I almost fell in love with everyone who crossed my path." She frowned.

  "Why don't you have one now?" It was difficult to suppress the pitch of excitement.

  "I don't know!" She grumbled. "Maybe because I'm through with it. I don't want to be with anyone anymore. This is wired right?" She sighed again.

  "At least you know what you want." I noted. My head was so full of her. I couldn't say anything further.

  "That doesn't matter to me." She said frosty.

  "Can I tell you a secret?" I snickered, the thought was excellent.

  “Yea, you can!" She smiled.

  "I have a friend― Mike" I imagined up the name. "And he thinks he is in love with a girl." I was tapping my feet all the time, honestly, I was nervous.

  "So?" She didn't look up as if she had her entire concentration in her work.

  "He wants to know whether the girl is interested in him.” I breathed in heavily, hoping if she didn't analyse it. She might get to know I was talking about her and me.

  She looked up almost instantly after I ended up with the last sentence. Her eyes were wickedly amused. "He wants to catch her up in the bed?"

  I was stunned. "Yes―No― I mean― Maybe. He thinks he's in love."

  She rolled her eyes, "Every guy says that Orpheus, that's nothing new. I bet when he's done, he won't even look at her."

  I got furious at this, she shouldn't have said this. I realized I was gritting my teeth. “You don't know a thing." I got up from the couch. I didn't want to talk with her now.

  "I have― been through it." I heard her voice behind me. It wasn't panicky. It was rather calm. I started walking away from her, out of the room, it was impossible to believe what she just said. Surprisingly, she was there in front of me before I could reach for the door, blocking the path with her hand. I stood with a blank face looking at her. After a few seconds of silence that followed, I chose to speak.