Love Me Through The Rain 3

by A'zayler

  It was nearing eleven o’clock before either of them were fully awake. With a headache the size of his entire apartment, Alex sat up in bed. He was about to go into his kitchen to grab some Tylenol until he saw Troy standing at the bottom of his bed putting his shoes back on.

  “You’re about to leave?”

  He looked up at Alex. “Yeah.”

  “For real?”

  “Yeah. What am I supposed to do?”

  Alex shrugged. “I don’t know, I just figured you might stay a while.”

  Troy stood up and grabbed his keys from the dresser. “No. I have to go.”

  “So, what was last night?”

  Troy looked away momentarily before looking back at Alex. “It was what it was. We were drunk, missed each other, and had a weak moment. Nothing more.”

  “Damn, it’s like that?”

  “How is it supposed to be? You still haven’t made up your mind about me yet, Alex. I had to call you. You didn’t call me, nor have you called since the day I left. You don’t care about me and I know that. I just got too deep in my feelings last night and slipped. I wanted you to love me like I loved you, but I’m sober again and now I feel like a fool. You still haven’t chosen me, so I’m out.” Troy didn’t bother waiting for an explanation from Alex before leaving.

  He walked out of Alex’s room and out of his apartment without another thought. Once again, Alex was left to wallow in his depression and uncertainty. As always, he had mixed feelings regarding he and Troy’s relationship. But for the first time in months, it had nothing to do with Damien. This time, he was taking full responsibility for it. This was on him. He was the unstable factor in both equations.

  Both of them knew what they wanted from him. It was him who didn’t know. Alex sat in the same spot for a little while longer before getting out of bed and going into his kitchen. He took two Tylenol and grabbed a bottle of water. He was back in bed and beneath the covers when he got a text.

  Damien: I’m coming through today

  Alex: Don’t bother

  Damien: I wasn’t asking

  Alex: Yes the fuck you were and I said no.

  Damien: Fuck it then. You stay on some bullshit

  Alex: Whatever

  Alex heard his phone beep again, but he didn’t even bother to look at it. He didn’t care about anything Damien had to say. He was still pissed at him about that shit he pulled on his baby mama’s birthday. He had been trying to make it up for weeks, but Alex wasn’t trying to hear it. That was so dead. Damien’s whole down low life was getting on his nerves.

  Instead of worrying himself with Damien and his foolishness, Alex turned his phone on airplane mode and went back to sleep. His head was already hurting, and it looked like Damien wanted nothing more than to make it hurt worse. He’d slept half of the day away by the time his eyes opened again.

  He closed his eyes as the sun shone through his curtains and lay still for a minute, trying to wake all the way up. When he felt together, he grabbed his phone and took it off of airplane mode. Before calling anyone else, he dialed Rain. He already knew she had called and was probably having a fit by now.

  “Why haven’t you been answering? You ain’t that drunk. It’s almost four o’clock in the afternoon.”

  “Calm down, mama. I had a late night. I woke up, took some medicine, and fell back to sleep. I had encountered some stupidity before I closed my eyes, so I turned it on airplane mode so I could get some rest. Is that okay with you?”

  “You should have text me or something so I would have known.”

  “Bitchhhhhh,” Alex dragged himself from the bed.

  He could hear Rain’s laughter coming from the other end of the phone. “I’m just trying to make sure your butt is okay. You play so many games, I have to make sure don’t nobody come over there and do nothing to your ass.”

  “Oh, they’ll come over here and do something to me alright. As a matter of fact, Troy came over last night and did a whole lot of things to my ass.”

  Rain screamed. “TMI, BITCH!”

  Alex laughed as he urinated. “I probably would still be screaming had the nigga not hopped up and dipped on my ass early.”

  “Dang, for real? Whose idea was it for him to come over?”

  “His. He called me and came over. I woke up this morning about to cook for the nigga with his fine ass, and he went off on me and left. Told me I still want to play, and I’m not ready for him and stuff. Honey, I just looked at him. I couldn’t even say nothing. My head was hurting too.” Alex sucked his teeth as he washed his hands and left his bathroom.

  “Troy means you’re going to act right or else.”

  “I know. That nigga won’t even give me a chance to mess up again.”

  “Got that lil butt and dipped.” Rain laughed again.

  “Didn’t he, though. Then stupid text me talking about he was coming over. Tuh! Nigga in what world? Not mine.”

  “Good. I’m proud of you. Don’t fall for all those straight nigga lies. He’s gay, so he need to tell you something you’ll believe.”

  “Die bitch, just die.” Alex laughed before he and Rain continued their normal banter for another hour or two, even calling Summer on three way before he hung up.

  It was just before six o’clock when he finally left his house. He hadn’t been to see his grandma in a few days, so he decided to stop there first. The nursing home she lived in was clean and packed as usual. Since he was going to see his grandmother, he tried to tone down his appearance a little. Not for her, but for all of the other nosey ass old people she lived with.

  She knew him and loved him the same, but he still did his best to keep it calm. He’d worn a straight pair of blue jeans and a plain white fitted t-shirt. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail and he wore large silver hoop earrings. He hadn’t put on any makeup, so he slid his large black shades over his face and walked to her room.

  When he pushed the door open, there was an older gentleman sitting next to her. He looked to be around his grandmother’s age and was smiling as large as his wrinkly old skin would allow. His brown skin and white hair resembled Alex’s grandmother. When they’d heard the door open, they both looked at him. His granny smiled while the old man just nodded his head.

  “There goes my baby.” She held both of her hands out toward him.

  Alex walked right to her and kissed her forehead, before leaning down to hug her. “Hey, sexy. What you doing with this man up in here?”

  His grandma smiled bashfully, before tapping his shoulder. “Oh, you stop it. This here is Randy. Randy, this is my beautiful baby, Alex. Alex, take your glasses off and say hello, baby.”

  Alex didn’t take orders from anyone but his granny. He’d do whatever she told him to do with no hesitation. He removed his glasses and stuck them into his purse before setting it on the floor. He stretched his hand out toward Randy, but all he did was look at it.

  “Oh, my. You’re a boy?” he asked once he could see Alex’s face clearly. “Emma Jean, you didn’t tell me the Alex you’re always talking about was a boy.”

  “So?” His granny looked at her friend like she had an attitude.

  Randy didn’t even bother to address her. He looked at Alex instead. “You are a boy, and you need to act like one. Wearing all this girl stuff is not going to make you a woman. You’re just a pervert.”

  “Randy, get your ass out of my room.” Emma Jean scolded.

  “It’s okay, Granny, he can stay. I’m not bothered.”

  “No he can’t either. Get out of here, you old fool.”

  “Gladly.” Randy hobbled to his feet and scooted out of the room with his cane.

  Alex thought about sticking his foot out and tripping him up but figured he may never heal so he changed his mind. Once the room to her door closed, she grabbed Alex’s hand.

  “I’m sorry, baby.”

  “It’s okay for real, Granny. I’m used to it.”

  “You shouldn’t have to be. That’s one of the main r
easons I tell you to let this go. People don’t see you for who you are. All they care about is the outside. They don’t know my sweet boy in here.” His granny tapped his chest.

  Alex sat on the carpeted floor near her feet and lay his head back against her knees. She rubbed his head and scratched his scalp like she’d been doing since he was a child.

  “How are you feeling today?”

  “Good as these old bones will let me feel. I haven’t seen you in a while. What’s going on?”

  “I’ve just been busy with work and stuff.” He was almost about to tell her about the fire at Rain’s house, but he caught himself. He didn’t want to worry her. She was old, and the smallest thing would send her over the edge.

  She patted his shoulder. “I understand, baby. It’s okay. It ain’t nothing going on in here anyway.”

  “I can’t tell. It looks like a lot going on with you and Randy’s old ass.”

  His granny laughed as she went back to rubbing his head. He didn’t know why, but she always got a kick out of him cussing. He tried his best to never take it too far because he respected her, but he still did just enough to make her laugh.

  “He’s just my friend.”

  “Um huh. That’s what they all say.”

  “How are your friends? I can’t remember their names. The good one and the other one.”

  Alex smiled because he knew she was referring to Damien and Troy. “They’re okay. One doesn’t want me because he says I don’t want him, then there’s the other one who doesn’t have a clue what he wants.”

  “Well, in my opinion, all of y’all are confused. All of y’all think y’all want each other, and that just ain’t right. Y’all need some women, baby. Not each other. That’s a sin.”

  “Granny…”

  “I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’mma say it anyway because I love you.”

  “I know, I’ve been thinking about going to church lately. I’m just scared because you know how church people can be.”

  “You can’t let that stop you. God is the only one you need to worry about pleasing.”

  “I just don’t want people looking at me and stuff.”

  His granny pushed his shoulder playfully. “Yes, you do. You’ve always wanted people to look at you. I think that’s half the reason you call yourself liking men.”

  Alex shook his head at his granny. She would say anything. He stayed with her for a little while longer before he announced he was leaving. She was sad to see him go, but he promised to come back soon. With his purse on his shoulder and his shades over his face, he left her room. In the lobby, he saw Randy standing near the nurse’s station.

  When he passed by, he heard him saying something that sounded like Alex should be ashamed of himself or something like that. Alex wasn’t going to say anything, but he’d let him slide the first time. This time, he turned around and walked over to him.

  “What did your old ass say to me?”

  “I said you need to be ashamed of yourself for acting like a woman.”

  “Let me tell you something, you old wrinkled balls fucker. I am grown and can do what the fuck I want. That includes dating boys. So take my advice, the next time you see me, keep it moving before I rub my dick across your old ass lips.” Alex smiled at the look on Randy’s face. “Was that manly enough for you?” He winked at Randy before walking away.

  He could hear the nurses at the station laughing as he headed for the door. He even snickered to himself some. He probably didn’t have to be so disrespectful, but some old people just brought it out of you. They thought because they were old that they could say what they wanted, and they probably could. Just not to Alex.

  When he got into his car, he called Summer. “Hey, what you doing?”

  “Getting ready to go to Jacorey’s house.”

  “You take advantage of your weekends off, don’t you?”

  “Boy, yeah. Those kids be having me running all week long. I be glad when the end of the week gets here.”

  Alex turned his car out of the parking lot. “What you and Jacorey about to do?”

  “Nothing for real, why?”

  “I was just about to see did you want to go to the mall with me. I need to get some white jeans for this hair magazine photo shoot I have coming up.”

  “Yeah, I’ll go. I can go see Jacorey later.”

  “Cool. I’m about to come get you.”

  Alex and Summer hung up. He drove the whole way to Summer’s spot singing along with his music. A few minutes after he text her to let her know he was outside, she was out the door. The burgundy dress she was wearing made her look ten times better than she already did. Summer was a bad ass female, and he was gay, so he could see why she had all the straight niggas choosing.

  She bounced happily to his car and got in. “Heyyyy, best friend.

  “Hey, boo. Put your seatbelt on.”

  Summer grabbed her seatbelt and locked it as Alex pulled out of her parking lot. They talked about a little bit of everything as they drove to the mall. They weren’t surprised that it was packed, being that it was Saturday. Peachtree Mall stayed packed on the weekends. Once Alex found a park, they got out and headed inside.

  They went from store to store looking for Alex the perfect all white outfit for his pictures. They were in H&M when they finally found something that he could work with. Alex stepped out of the dressing room for Summer to see the pants.

  “Yes. I like those.” She held her thumb up.

  “What about my butt. It ain’t sticking too far out, is it?” Alex looked at himself in the body length mirror behind him.

  “No, honey. Those pants are fierce,” some boy who had just come out of the dressing room next to his said.

  Alex and Summer both looked at him. He was a skinny little black boy with tight clothes on. They fit a little too snug for Alex’s liking, but he made up for it with his makeup. His face was made up beautifully and he had a long blonde weave. Alex probably wouldn’t have picked the blonde for him, but it was done so he couldn’t say much.

  “You think so?” Alex asked.

  “I do. And so what if your butt sticks out? That’s a good thing, queen.” He snapped and put his hand on his hip.

  Summer snapped playfully and put her hand on her hip as well. “Well, queen, the crowd has spoken. Now go take them damn pants off so we can go. It’s too many lil children up in this mall. I think I saw one of my students.”

  Alex and the boy both laughed at Summer. Alex turned toward the boy. “Thank you.”

  “No problem, my love.” He air kissed Alex before leaving the dressing room.

  When Alex was completely dressed and had the pants thrown across his arm, he and Summer walked out of the room.

  “Baby was high maintenance, honey,” Summer said, referring to the boy from the dressing room.

  “Baby needed to get rid of that blonde hair and them tight ass clothes.”

  Summer giggled as she nodded her head. “You ain’t lying.”

  “Then had the nerve to think I was going to take his advice on some clothes.” Alex and Summer huddled together laughing as they walked down the aisle.

  “We ain’t even right talking about that boy like that. He was nice.”

  “Yeah, he was. He just needed some nicer weave and nicer hair.” Alex said, making her laugh again.

  She was still laughing as he turned around to get a different pair of the white pants. He never bought the clothes he tried on. He always had to get a new pair in his size. He was still pushing through the racks when he felt Summer discreetly tapping his back.

  “Don’t look now, but I think Troy is in here with Mr. Go-Go Diva.”

  Alex disregarded everything Summer had said about not looking and spun completely around. As soon as he did, he came face to face with Troy. He was standing near the rack of clothes the boy was sifting through. When he saw Alex, his face gave him away. He looked caught as he began fidgeting with his hands.

  “Can you believe t
his nigga?”

  “I mean, Alex, it has been a while since y’all broke up.”

  Alex looked at Summer. “It may have been, but it ain’t been but a few hours since the last time he got this ass.”

  Summer’s eyes bucked. “He came over there last night?”

  Alex nodded. “That’s probably why he over there looking crazy. Scared I’mma tell on his ass.” Alex sucked his teeth. “He could have done better than that nigga. He around here making me feel bad about not choosing him and shit, and he’s up in here sporting America’s Next Top Sissy. I can’t believe this shit.” Alex turned back around and began sifting through the clothes again.

  He tried his best not to let Troy’s actions get the best of him, but he couldn’t help himself. He sniffed continuously trying to keep his tears at bay, but it was getting harder and harder by the second. When Summer finally noticed what he was doing, she walked closer to him and grabbed his chin. She turned his whole face toward her and looked into his eyes.

  “Stop this shit. Stop it now. You will not stand in this mall and cry about no nigga. Especially one you don’t even want. Get yourself together.”

  Alex nodded and tried to pull his face away, but Summer held on to it. “You’re going to be fine, boo. You hear me? You are fine.”

  Alex nodded again, still unable to speak, and turned back around. His constant fidgeting must have annoyed Summer because she looked through the rack and grabbed his size. She then grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the register. They stood in line waiting to be rung up. He was looking around trying to avoid Summer, but she was staring at him hard as hell trying to make sure he didn’t cry.

  Alex wanted to say something smart, but at the moment, he really couldn’t. He didn’t have anything left to say. He was so used to Troy always being there no matter what. Now to see him out with somebody else made him question not only himself and Troy but everything they’d been through as well. All the things Troy had ever told him. Including the fact that he loved him because that had to be a lie. There was no way that he would be out in public flossing the next nigga if he did.