Heart of Ice

by Jalissa Pastorius

  “Next time, I offer you milk. Make sure you drink up.” He said looking at her. Christina nodded her head.

  “Now clean me up,” he said scooting closer to her.

  “But Matt, I’m still chained to the bed,” she said looking at him. She watched as he reached into the night stand and pulled out a wet wipe. He handed it to her, it was a wet wipe and she cleaned the juices from him. He dispose of the wipe and sat in front of her. It was then she realized what he wanted. He moved further up to her, she opened her mouth once again and began to lick him before enclosing him her hot warm and moist mouth.

  Chapter 18

  Christina sat in the spa tub. Her ass hurt. She didn’t know what exactly happened in the bedroom, but it was humiliating. She still remembered him splitting her ass opened with his girth and then requiring her to lick him clean. After his release, he unchained her and walked out of the bedroom. Leaving her sore, dirty and cold. She remained frozen. She truly loved him but she didn’t sign up for this. Where was her loving Matt? The guy who had spoiled her on their retreat. Dragging herself to the tub. She cried.

  She wondered where he went. It wasn’t supposed to turn out like this. Her body betrayed her. Although it felt good it was the principle. She told him no and he took anyway. She still hadn’t had a chance to piss on the stick. Her mind was working double time. She sunk further into the tub dipping her head in the water. She just wanted to wish it all away.

  Matt went into the kitchen. He called his personal chef to have him whip up something for Christina and him. His little angel surprised him in the bedroom. She wouldn’t be going anywhere else. He fucked her so hard, that he left her despondent on the bed. He smiled. The chef was going to whip up some scampi, and a great seafood dish. He got everything ready. He set up in the entertaining room. He lit the candles and put on a movie that he knew she would enjoy. He’d already took a steamy shower. He would give her a massage too. He got up to go retrieve Christina.

  Christina looked up when Matt entered into the bathroom. He reached for her and she shied away. Matt looked at her in confusion.

  “Christina what’s wrong?”

  “Nothing, I’m just tired.”

  “Come, I got something special set up for you.”

  “Matt, I’m really tired. I just want to sleep,” she told him. She saw something flash in his eyes. A chill shot down her spine. She gulped.

  “I’m coming.” She said watching him go retrieve a towel from the towel warmer. She sat quietly as he dried her off. He picked out her lingerie, dressed her, and slipped the robe on her. She sat there like a porcelain doll while he did this. Scooping her up he took her to the area he set up.

  Christina opened her eyes and gasped in surprise. The room had been lit with candles and delicious seafood dishes had been arranged on the table. It was then she looked up at Matt and his kind eyes were back. She smiled in delight.

  “You did this for me?”

  “Well of course.” He said kissing her on the forehead before setting her down on the couch. This was what she loved about Matt. She loved these tender moments with him. It was in these moments that she could picture him with a baby. Her heart dropped to her stomach thinking about it. How would he react to kids? She watched as he put the movie on. It was the notebook. She seen the movie countless times. It was one of her favorites.

  “Matt,”

  “Hmm?” he asked snuggling with her in his lap.

  “How do you feel about kids in general?” she was nervous about his overall answer. She wasn’t going to tell him at this time. She needed to check and see if she was pregnant first.

  “Overall, I enjoy them. Their innocence always reminds me that there’s some good in the world. It is that innocence that I want to protect.”

  “Did you have a bad childhood?” she asked. She heard the conviction in his voice.

  “What brought this on?” he really didn’t want to talk about it. His childhood wasn’t something he like to remember.

  “I’m sorry; I didn’t meant to upset you.” Christina felt her shoulders drip. Matt looked at the woman in his arms. He supposed he could tell her a little bit about it. Natalia knew he didn’t like to talk about his childhood and avoided the topic at all cost.

  “No it’s fine. I was never good enough Christina. I always had something to prove. Even being born into a million dollar industry at the time, I had nothing. I was always alone and studying. I could never do anything to please her. I just wanted her to love me, and my cowardly father did nothing to stop it. I was always too stupid. I was slow. I wasn’t even allowed to touch her. I made that mistake when I was three. I had witness the parents of other children hug them and sweep them of their feet. I remembered having an argument with another child. They called my mother a witch, said she was evil. I punched the child square in the face and ran home to give my mommy a hug. She was my mother. I rushed toward her with open arms. I was backhanded so hard that I saw stars. It was the nanny who found me later that evening on the floor unconscious.”

  “Matt that’s horrible.” She said burling further into him.

  “It was kept quiet. The pity in the servants’ eyes pissed me off more. The child was right. My mother was an evil witch. I learned to keep my distance. I figured if I studied hard then maybe I would be rewarded with a hug. Sadly, I was mistaken. By the age of fourteen I gave up. I was resigned to the fact that I was destined to be alone. I grabbed my shit and ran.”

  “What happened after that?”

  “That is a story for a different time. I would absolutely go crazy if I ever lost you Christina. I wouldn’t know what to do.” He said gripping her tighter.

  “I’m not going anywhere.” She said. No wondered why he was so controlling, overbearing and possessive. She just had to get him to trust her and then he would get better. It would be difficult. How could she get him to trust her when she hadn’t even been truthful about her own childhood? This was going to be hard.

  ***

  He sat on the terrace of a little restaurant in Italy. The business journal had finally been delivered to him. He had a fat cigar in his mouth. It was such a glorious morning. He was still pissed about the millions of dollars that he missed out on years ago. Glancing through the paper the cigar fell out of his mouth. It seemed his little bird was out in the financial and corporate world once again. It was time to pay her a visit. He folded the paper. It was time to plan their next move.

  ***

  Christina walked quickly through the halls. She needed to find a restroom. She felt like she was carrying a bomb around in her purse, and there was a neon sign stamped to her forehead that said guilty. Was it her or was it getting hot in here. She just needed to calm herself down and piss on the damn stick. Greeting the people as she walked through the building. She exuded confidence and superiority but on the inside she wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Rushing into the bathroom that join to their office, Christina quickly removed the test from the box. Her hands shook. This was her moment of truth. She sat on the toilet and aimed the stick.

  Once she finished her business, she waited for the test results. Who knew a minute would feel like an eternity. She counted. She needed to calm down. Taking a deep breath and exhaling she opened her eyes. She picked up the stick.

  Pregnant.

  Eh?! It was a lie. It wasn’t her pee on the stick. It had to be the invisible woman hiding in the corner. Yeah that was it. She would just have to take another test when she got home. There have been cases of false pregnancies. The brain was a powerful tool and could trick the body into thinking something was happening to it that really wasn’t happening. It was the sole reasoning behind the; if you’re falling in your sleep you must wake up before you hit the ground or you die thing. Jerking awake from the nightmare, you feel your heart racing as if you had really been falling.

  Gah! What was she going to do with the test? She couldn’t leave it in the bathroom. Charles would find it and she may have some explaining to do. She put
the cap back on and rolled it up in some tissue. Snatching a small trash bag from the underneath the sink, she bagged the test up. Deep breaths. She had no idea when she walked out of the bathroom, that there was a glassy eyed look in her eyes. She moved robotically to her desk and began her work. Charles hadn’t arrived yet.

  “Take a break my dear,” Charles said approaching her with coffee and a baguette.

  “You are a saint,” she stood up and cracked her neck. She took a sip of the coffee. Wait a minute, was she even allowed to have coffee. Would it hurt the baby? Wait she wasn’t officially pregnant yet. She just had to breathe.

  “I don’t want you to overwork yourself my dear. It’s already midmorning. Lay there and relax and let me do some work.”

  “Yes daddy,” she giggled, following his instructions.

  “Anytime dear,” he mumbled, as she laid down to get some rest. Christina closed her eyes and drifted off. She needed to make an appointment with her doctor. Her dreams consisted of a little Matt hiding in a dark corner and baby wails. She jerked awake.

  “Charles, how long have I’ve been asleep,” she asked sitting up.

  “Not very long dear, maybe an hour. I’ve brought back lunch for you. It’s in the fridge.”

  “You’re spoiling me. I’m going to get fat.”

  “Good, it’s my job to spoil you. Especially when you are such an excellent worker. You know you can give me a call. You see, I’ve never had a daughter of my own, and I would like to think of you as such.” Christina heart pounded in her chest, would she finally get the very thing that she’s been after all these years?

  “Of course, Charles,” she said blushing wildly. Ducking her head.

  “Very good. I can’t wait for Martha to meet you. Maybe when you’re free on the weekend we can have tea.”

  “That would be lovely, Charles.” They exchanged telephone numbers. Thankfully the rest of the evening remained uneventful. She finished up her work and said bye to Charles. She wondered what the night would bring.

  Chapter 19

  Christina had settled into her life in New York. Work was going great and there hadn’t been any crazy incidents with Matt. He was very loving and doted on her endlessly. She was spoiled. This particular morning Matt had surprised her with a diamond tear drop necklace. She couldn’t believe he gotten it for her. He placed the piece of jewelry around her neck and told her that he wanted to see her wear it for him. It was a Sunday morning and she had told him about going over to Charles’ house to have breakfast and tea. She was excited to meet Martha.

  The possible pregnancy gnawed at the back of her mind. If she calculated the time with her missed period she would be about eight weeks along. Geez. She couldn’t wait to get to the doctor. She had a doctor’s appointment on Monday before she went into the office. She needed to tell Charles about it before she left.

  “I’ll be back later after tea. Tell Collum I said hi, and make sure you stay out of trouble.” She said giving Matt a kiss before she left.

  “But that’s impossible. You know trouble follows Collum around.”

  “Indeed,” she said exasperated. She got quickly into her car glad to be spending time with Charles.

  ***

  Collum hated what he had to do, but he couldn’t get a hold of any more information concerning Christina. He had tried for the past week and nothing. He needed someone with much more clout and unfortunately that someone was Matt. He entered the condo only to find his friend staring out the window at the New York City skyline. It was a stunning view.

  “Just coming to see how the other half lives,” he said jokingly as he gave Matt a hug.

  “Don’t sell yourself so short, you’re no pauper.” Matt said clasping Collum on the back.

  “Tell me, how’s that little angel you’ve found doing?”

  “Great, she’s been an asset to the financial department. All the revenue is in order and even projected outcomes are in place for the next year or so. I suppose it helps her being a genius and all. I’m certainly benefiting from it.”

  “Maybe I could have her take a look at some of the technology my security company is using,” he mused.

  “If it’s fine with her. Sure.”

  “Do you love her?” Collum was nervous. This was the first time since Natalia Matt had been serious about a woman. For a moment there he thought his friend was celibate during his time before Christina. He tried talking himself out of digging in her past many times before, but with Matt falling so hard for her, he wanted to protect him. He wouldn’t let anyone else hurt him like that. They’d been through too much. He watched as Matt mulled the question over, with a sinking heart he knew he was getting ready to shatter his world. He would do it again and again if it met protecting him.

  “Honestly, I’m scared. I’m so afraid that she’s going to leave me that it sickens me. How cowardly. I’ve even made some poor choices concerning her, but were moving forward. I haven’t told her about Natalia yet.”

  “What did you tell her?” Collum was surprised; even with Natalia Matt had never talked about his past.

  “I told her about my childhood. Why things are strained with the family.”

  “How did this conversation even come up?”

  “I don’t know. We were talking about kids in general. Where is this conversation going?” he asked Collum confused. He was starting to sound like a chick if he was going to discuss every little detail with his best friend.

  “Matt I care about you. Love you like you’re my flesh and blood, like my brother.”

  “Of course I know that Collum, and I feel the same.” Matt could feel his heart starting to race in his chest. Things never went well when Collum became sentimental. It made him nervous.

  “Dammit Collum! Just spit it out.”

  “I did some digging.”

  “Wait a minute, I thought you were done.”

  “You know I like to be thorough.”

  “What else could there be?”

  “She was involved in a double homicide, involving her own father. There was so much red tape that even I didn’t have the clearance to dig any deeper. That’s where you come in.”

  Matt hadn’t heard him. He was focused on the word homicide. There had to be some explanation. He hadn’t spilled all his secrets. He hadn’t told her about Natalia yet. What could she be planning? Did she want him to fall in love with her, marry her and then plan to murder him in cold blood? They’d been getting along so well. Why would she hide something of this caliber?

  “Matt?”

  “I’ll see what I can do.”

  “Are you alright?” Collum asked worriedly. His friend looked like he lost a shade of color.

  “Of course I am. Let’s go. It’s time to get to work.”

  ***

  Christina pulled up to a nice home on the outskirts of New York City. It was a nice Victorian styled home. She could definitely picture Charles living there. There was great architecture everywhere that suited his personality. When she rang the doorbell, a nice older woman greeted her. She was stunning. She was tall and had nice kind amber colored eyes. They were unusual almost red in color.

  “Hello dear, Charles has told me so much about you.” She said pulling Christina in for a hug. Christina sighed and sunk into the hug. She never experienced an embrace quite like this one. It almost brought tears to her eyes, maybe she was just emotional from the possible pregnancy; which was something else she didn’t want to think about.

  “Oh, come along dear. Let’s get some tea and scones into you.”

  “Is she finally here Martha?” Charles asked as he set his morning paper aside and peered at his wife through his spectacles.

  “Of course dear and she’s every bit of a young lady.”

  “Charles!” she giggled, while launching herself into his arms.

  “How are you this morning?” he asked as Martha served them their tea and scones before taking a seat.

  “I’m great. I’m quite sure you’re p
leased about the progress the finance department has made.”

  “All the credit goes to you, my dear.”

  “Such advance formulas, I’m proud. If I didn’t know any better, I would think you are a mathematical genius.”

  Christina gulped; she’s been omitting the truth so much that she was starting to feel guilty.

  “What’s wrong dear?” Martha asked with concerned in her face.

  “Nothing.” She whispered looking down at her tea and avoiding eye contact. The older couple grew concern. Charles didn’t know what he could have said to cause such a reaction from her. If anything he loved the young lady as if she were his own. He always wanted a daughter.

  “Christina, you don’t have to say anything more. I didn’t mean to upset you dear.” He said worriedly. Christina burst into tears. Damn these hormones. She wasn’t pregnant until the doctor said she was. Plus, how was she ever going to tell Matt?

  “It’s not that,” she said sobbing into the tissue that Martha handed her, while rubbing smoothing circles on her back.

  “Alright dear, you don’t have to say anything more.”

  “No, but I want to. I am a genius.” She sniffled. She heard Charles laughter filled the air, soon she found herself giggling along with them.

  “It’s what I’ve been telling you all along dear.”

  “But Charles,” Christina whined.