The Summer of New Beginnings: A Magnolia Grove Novel

by Bette Lee Crosby

  “It seems we should have heard something by now,” she said.

  Gabriel shook his head. “It’s usually about three hours.”

  He’s done this before. He’s guided other families through this just as he’s doing for me. She nodded and gave a whisper-thin smile. “Thank you.”

  It was another long hour before Dr. Crawford finally came to the waiting room.

  “The implant is in, and everything went well,” she said. “Lucas is in recovery now.”

  “Oh, thank God.” The stiffness in Tracy’s back went soft, and she relaxed against Gabriel’s shoulder. “He’s all right, isn’t he? There were no complications?”

  Dr. Crawford gave an understanding smile. “No complications,” she said. “Everything went very smoothly. As soon as Lucas is settled in his room, the nurse will be out to get you, and you’ll be able to see him.”

  “How long will it be?” she asked anxiously.

  Dr. Crawford chuckled. “Not long, fifteen or twenty minutes. But he won’t be able to go home tonight. We like to keep a patient Lucas’s age overnight just to make sure he’s doing well.”

  “How long before he can go home?”

  “He should be good to go tomorrow, but you’ll need to keep him quiet for a few days. Bed rest if possible.”

  Tracy was so happy she wanted to pull Dr. Crawford into a bear hug, but she held back. Instead, she simply reached out and took the doctor’s hand in both of hers.

  “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you so much.”

  When they finally got to see Lucas, Tracy was momentarily taken aback. He was paler than she’d expected and groggy from the anesthesia. A patch of hair was missing, the bandage covering it stained with blood. Tracy gently ran her fingers along the curve of his cheek, then took his tiny hand in hers. He was so small, and it seemed so wrong that he should have to go through something like this. Her eyes welled with tears.

  “My poor baby,” she whispered, and bent to kiss his forehead.

  Even though he had been through so much, there would be no immediate reward. It would be another long month before he would be able to hear his first sound. The waiting was going to be hard, very hard.

  Tears crested her eyes, and she brushed them away with the back of her hand. “You’re such a brave little boy,” she said. “I know you can’t hear me now, but someday you will. You’ll hear my voice and come to know the sound of it.” Again she blinked back the tears. “Right now this is hard, baby, I realize that. But one day you’ll be able to talk like all the other children. I promise, Lucas. I swear, no matter what, I’ll make it happen.”

  As Gabriel stood beside her, he felt a lump rise in his throat.

  Meghan and Lila left the hospital early that evening, but Tracy stayed, and Gabriel stayed with her. Standing together at the side of Lucas’s crib, they watched him sleep, the tiny breaths causing his chest to rise and fall rhythmically.

  Tracy brushed a lock of hair from his forehead and, without looking up, said, “Lucas has a lot of hard work ahead of him, doesn’t he?”

  Gabriel nodded and touched his hand to the small of her back. “You both do. There will be times when you may grow weary of repeating the same phrases in precisely the same way over and over again, but I promise you that in the end it will all be worthwhile.”

  Even though he’d gone over it several times before, he told again of how Lucas’s speech would come haltingly at first with single-syllable words and repetitive sounds. In time he would be able to look at a picture and give it a name: duck, dog, water, house. After that he would move on to where he could connect words to one another, asking for a drink of water or saying the dog was brown and the house was big.

  For years, his actual age and his hearing age would be different. Lucas was fifteen months old now, but in hearing years, he had yet to be born. His hearing birth would happen after the external sound processor was turned on and he listened to Tracy’s voice for the first time.

  “It’s a slow process,” Gabriel said, understanding the comfort it brought to hear these things again, “but I believe by the time he turns five, his hearing age and actual age will come together and be the same.”

  A soft smile settled on Tracy’s face as she listened. And when Gabriel spoke of the day when Lucas’s speech would be no different from that of a hearing person, she clasped her hand over his.

  “I don’t know how I would have gotten through this without you,” she said.

  In the dim light of Lucas’s hospital room, Gabriel looked down at her face and felt a swell inside his chest. He had seen this look of gratitude on countless other faces, but somehow it looked different on Tracy. More glowing. He hoped that what he saw was something more than gratitude. He wanted to believe it was a thing that would last, a thing he could hold on to.

  He stayed with her until almost midnight, and when he left it was only at Tracy’s insistence. “You’ll be exhausted,” she’d said. “Go home and get some sleep.”

  Once he was gone, she sat in the chair alongside Lucas’s crib. It had been a long and tiring day, but still sleep was impossible to come by. She closed her eyes and let her thoughts drift back to the years in high school, wondering why it was she’d never before noticed Gabriel Hawke.

  At ten thirty the next morning, when Meghan returned to the hospital, Lucas was ready to go home.

  In the Following Weeks

  A week later, Lucas saw the surgeon for a checkup. By then he was back to himself, anxious to chase after Sox and almost impossible to keep still.

  Dr. Crawford examined the surgical site, declared Lucas was doing beautifully, and they were out of the office in ten minutes flat. Having the surgery behind them seemed a giant step forward, but in truth, it was only the first of many such steps. The hard work was still ahead, the hardest being the long weeks of waiting. Seemingly endless days of living in limbo, wondering if in fact everything would work as it was supposed to.

  Since she was already in Barrington, Tracy texted Gabriel and asked if they might stop by the school.

  I’d like Lucas to get to know the place so he won’t be scared when he starts therapy.

  The answer came a few minutes later.

  Absolutely, he replied. I’m in my office, just come on up.

  That afternoon Tracy and Lucas spent two hours at the school. Instead of touring the building, they settled in one of the small classrooms where Lucas rummaged through the toys and plucked out a favorite. It was a red dump truck that he happily rolled back and forth across the floor.

  Gabriel envisioned the thoughts filling Tracy’s head and gave her a knowing smile.

  “Do you realize that by this time next year, Lucas will be able to ask for that toy and tell you what color it is?”

  When she allowed herself to look ahead and see such achievements, it took her breath away.

  “A year,” she murmured. “It’ll certainly be a long one.”

  Gabriel chuckled. “Not if you keep busy and give Lucas time to grow into the new skills he’ll be learning.”

  Long after Tracy left the school, Gabriel’s words remained in her head. She mulled the thought over during the drive home and as she was having dinner. When Lila set her homemade apple pie on the table and poured everyone a cup of coffee, Tracy spoke up.

  “I’d like to work for the Snip ’N’ Save full-time,” she said.

  “Full-time?” Meghan registered a look of surprise. “I hope you don’t feel that you have to.”

  “I know I don’t have to; I want to. I want to be here with Lucas so I can watch him grow and learn to speak. A year from now he’ll probably be talking, and he’ll need someone to constantly reinforce the things he learns in speech therapy.”

  “I can do that,” Lila said.

  “I know, but I want to be the one to do it. It’ll be good for both of us.” Tracy gave a playful grin and said, “After all, Mama, if a woman is on her own, she needs to have a real job.”

  “That’s foolish,” Lil
a replied. “Why would you think you need a full-time job? I’m fine with the way things are.”

  “Mama, come on. I’m a grown woman. It’s time I started getting my act together. Besides, Meghan has been shouldering the responsibility for far too long.” She looked over at her sister and smiled. “Maybe it’s not too late for journalism school after all.”

  It had been years since Meghan thought of Grady, and the mention of it now seemed strangely out of place.

  “I’m not sure that after all this time . . . ”

  “The thing is, you can go to school or not go to school; it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that for the first time since Daddy died, you’ll be free to do what you want to do, not what you have to do.”

  Meghan considered this for a moment, then gave a small laugh. She couldn’t imagine not running the Snip ’N’ Save, and yet . . .

  “If you’re really serious, I suppose we could give it a try.”

  That night Meghan pulled the box of composition books from beneath her bed and began to read back through the years. She read page after page telling how eager she was to attend Grady and how one day she hoped to be a star reporter for the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Tucked inside one book she found the school brochure, dog-eared and worn thin from all the times she’d pored over it and pictured herself there in one of those classrooms. She closed her eyes and tried to remember the passion she’d felt back then, but oddly enough, it was missing.

  She moved on and read about the weeks and months after her daddy had died and the heartache of losing first him and then Tracy. How could she give up the Snip ’N’ Save? It wasn’t just a job; it was her life. When everything else fell apart, she always had the Snip ’N’ Save with its pages waiting to be filled and deadlines demanding her attention.

  Without understanding how it came about, she found herself holding yet another composition book in her hand. It was the book tied with a metallic gold ribbon. She tugged the tail end of the bow, and the book fell open just as she knew it would.

  These pages told a different story. It was one of falling in love. It told of that first night and how as she and Tom sat across from one another at the Garden, she’d known they were destined to be more than friends. As she read how he’d brushed his thumb across her lip, she could feel her heartbeat quicken.

  Suddenly a whirlwind of thoughts came rushing at her. This had been a summer of miracles. She thought of that day at the lake: Sox in the water, the storm, and the unexplainable wave that pushed them ashore. Sox leading her to Tom. His bark telling her that Lucas couldn’t hear. If she had been away at Grady, none of these things would have happened. The thought of Sox lying at the bottom of the lake sent a shudder up her spine.

  When Meghan climbed into bed, he jumped in beside her. As she absently began to stroke his fur, she thought about her life. Everything she loved was here in Magnolia Grove. She didn’t have to go in search of happiness; it was right under her nose.

  The next day, Meghan suggested she and Tracy work together at the Snip ’N’ Save.

  “There’s a lot to learn,” she said, “but I’m thinking in time you could take over production, and I’ll work on new business development.”

  “Perfect! That way you can cover for me when I take Lucas to therapy, and I can cover for you whenever . . . ” Tracy gave a sly grin and didn’t bother finishing the thought.

  As August rolled into September, Meghan found days when she had little or nothing to do. In times like that, she packed a lunch basket, and she and Sox visited Tom at the clinic. On sunny days they sat outside at the picnic table, and on rainy days Tom cleared a spot on his desk and they sat opposite one another while Sox curled up beneath her chair. Emily joined them occasionally, but more often than not, she had errands to do.

  “Grocery shopping,” she’d say as she hung the OUT TO LUNCH sign on the door and hurried off. If it wasn’t groceries, it was dry cleaning that needed to be dropped off or a prescription to be picked up at the drugstore. Emily was a bundle of efficiency who managed to keep both the office and her family running smoothly.

  On the odd afternoons when Emily did get bogged down with record-keeping duties, Meghan stayed to walk the dogs and put fresh water in the bowls. One such day, she had a boxer with a wide body and disagreeable disposition out of his crate and hooked to a leash before Tom had the chance to warn her that Bruiser had to be muzzled.

  “You’ve got to be careful with this dog,” he said, hurrying over. “He doesn’t like being put on the leash and will go for your arm.”

  Meghan rumpled the fur atop Bruiser’s head. “Nonsense. He’s sweet as can be.” She lifted him to the floor and strolled out the door.

  Tom watched the dog trotting along as if he had no trouble whatsoever with being on a leash.

  “Well, I’ll be darned . . . ”

  Later that afternoon, he asked what she’d done to calm the dog.

  “Nothing special,” she said, “just told him he was a good boy.”

  Tom shook his head. “You’re really good with animals. I think you might’ve missed your calling.”

  She laughed at the thought, but a spot of color rose up in her cheeks.

  The First Sound

  Tracy decided to have Michelle, the audiologist at the school, do Lucas’s mapping. This was perhaps the most crucial stage of the process. It was when he would be given an external processor and hear sound for what probably would be the first time.

  Her nerves were stripped raw. For nearly a month she’d counted the days, marked them off one by one, waiting, anticipating this moment, but now as she buttoned Lucas’s shirt, her fingers trembled. She thought back on Gabriel’s words: nothing is absolute.

  There were too many ways this could go wrong. If the sound were too loud, Lucas might cry or try to yank the processor off and could reject it completely. If the sound were too low, he’d hear nothing but muted murmurs.

  She lifted him into the high chair and spread a handful of Cheerios on the tray. Lucas was still a baby; all of this was foreign to him. He had developed his own habits, his own way of navigating a silent world. Now, after sixteen months, they were asking him to accept the strange new noises in his head. Was such a thing even possible? In those first few moments, he wouldn’t know that what he was hearing was her voice, and there was no way to explain it because he understood no words.

  Tracy knew the only thing she could do was watch his face and try to gauge his reaction. If he cried or buried his head in her lap, she would try to show him this was a good thing with the touch of her hand and the feel of a few familiar words.

  For nearly a week she’d been working with Lucas the way Meghan had, holding his hand to her face and letting him feel the vibrations of her throat. She’d used only two words: mama and Lucas. Two words were enough.

  When Michelle turned the sound on, Tracy would touch his fingers to her throat so he would recognize the familiar vibrations as the word came to his ear. She prayed it was enough, that he would understand this strange new sound was their link to one another. Last night she’d not slept a wink, thinking of how it would be for Lucas, praying that such a small child would have the kind of acceptance that would be difficult even for an adult.

  She’d told Meghan only that she was driving over to see Gabriel. She hadn’t mentioned that this was to be the day. She wanted desperately to have Meghan with her, but Gabriel said fewer distractions were better, so she’d decided to go alone.

  “Tracy?” Meghan repeated.

  “Huh?” The sound of her name shook Tracy from her thoughts. “Sorry, I guess my mind was somewhere else.”

  “Is something wrong?”

  Tracy shook her head. “Just tired. I didn’t sleep well last night.”

  “Want me to drive you over to—”

  “No need,” she said, rejecting the thought before Meghan finished the question. She took one last sip of her coffee, then lifted Lucas from the high chair and started for the door.

 
“See you later,” she called out, trying to sound light and breezy.

  When they arrived at the school, Gabriel was waiting in the front lobby.

  “Today’s the big day,” he said, smiling. “Michelle has everything ready.” He lifted Lucas into his arms, and they started toward the audiology lab.

  As she trudged along, a row of worry lines settled on Tracy’s forehead.

  “I hope it goes well.” Her voice was shaky and thin as an eggshell.

  “It’ll be fine,” Gabriel assured her. “I have a feeling this little guy is going to surprise you.”

  The audiology room was on the second floor of the school. It was a small room with a computer desk, two comfortable chairs, and a few toys atop the desk. Michelle was at the desk making some last-minute adjustments to the program when they walked in.

  “Welcome,” she said with a bright smile.

  Tracy returned the smile and nodded. She sat in one chair with Lucas on her lap. Gabriel took the other.

  Michelle pulled a box from beneath the desk and came around, carrying the two small processors. Each one was about the size of a quarter, a magnetized unit that snapped onto the back of Lucas’s head. Narrow wires connected the processors to the power pack.

  “Let’s get you set up,” she said, “then we’ll turn the sound on.” She adjusted the wires and then plugged the power pack into the computer.

  “Can he hear now?” Tracy asked nervously.

  Michelle shook her head. “The power’s not on yet.” Reaching over for her mouse, she made a few clicks, then smiled across the desk. “The sound is on now, but it’s very low. Let’s see if he reacts.”

  Tracy held her breath for a moment, uncertain of what to expect. She could feel the thumping inside her chest. It seemed her heart had somehow risen into her throat. She called his name, praying he would respond. “Lucas?”