Death Before Decaf

by Caroline Fardig

  “I know, right?” He laughed mirthlessly. “But he got what was coming to him. I made sure of that.”

  “And?”

  Trevor lowered his voice. “I’m not supposed to talk about it, because the school wants to keep it quiet.”

  “Keep what quiet?” I needed to know this information.

  “Well, you have to promise not to tell anyone.”

  “I promise.”

  “I caught Davis and Christina together in his office. Doing it.”

  “Ouch.” My gut was right. There was something wrong with Seth. Screwing coeds was a major personality flaw.

  “Yeah. It was a week before the semester began, and Davis had just been hired. I went to the dean and threatened to go public with it, so they canned him immediately, shuffling the other professors around to cover his classes. They made it look like he was never here.” No wonder he didn’t show up on Vanderbilt’s website. Mystery solved. Except…

  “So why is he still here?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I just talked to him a few minutes ago. He’s still hanging around campus.”

  “No, he moved back to Washington. I watched him pack up his apartment.”

  What? My mind was reeling. I looked past Trevor and saw Seth talking to a couple of students not far from where I found him on the library lawn. “Come with me.” Dragging Trevor along, I found a place behind a tree to hide while we spied on Seth.

  “I’m going to be late for class.”

  “This will only take a second. Look over there.” I pointed to Seth. “See that tall guy in the blue T-shirt? The one with dark hair and lots of muscles.”

  “Yeah, so?”

  “That’s Seth Davis.”

  “No, it’s not.”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “It’s not the Seth Davis I know.”

  My mouth dropped open in shock. “That guy told me he was Seth Davis, film studies professor at Vanderbilt University.”

  “I think you got punked.”

  “Why in the hell would someone impersonate a professor, especially one who had been fired?”

  Trevor shrugged. “Who knows? Maybe to get some college-chick ass. Now I really have to get to class. Later.”

  I stood there, stunned. How could Seth, if that was his real name, be so charming and totally dateable one moment, and then turn around and be a sleazy impostor trying to nail college girls the next? Too miffed and befuddled to come up with a good plan for busting him, I decided to observe him for a while. He was talking to a couple of girls, laughing and gesturing with his hands. They were giggling and flipping their hair, like girls do. The thought of him trolling for girls on a college campus made me ill. What if it wasn’t just about hooking up with a few teenagers? What if he was a serial killer or something, and this was how he found his prey?

  Uh-oh, he was on the move. I slyly tracked him across the lawn, making sure to keep a safe distance between us. The sidewalks in that part of campus were especially tree-lined, so it wasn’t difficult to keep myself out of sight, even though he never looked back. He cut between a few buildings, and we ended up on Sorority Row. Shocker. What a douche. He strutted down that street like he owned the place, nodding and waving to every girl he saw.

  After that, he left campus and went across West End to Office Depot. I figured he couldn’t do too many dastardly things in an Office Depot, so I decided to wait a little ways down the strip mall, outside FedEx. I didn’t know if I felt uneasy because I was following someone and had to be covert, or if something else was amiss. Maybe it was nothing, but I was on my guard just in case. The October sun was hot, and I was getting uncomfortably sweaty, but I soldiered on. I was determined to find out why Seth had lied to me about who he was. My previous “detective” work had been interesting, but tailing someone was majorly boring. I wished he would do something that would definitively show me that he was a villainous impostor or psychopath, mostly so that I could go the hell back to work. Seth was in Office Depot forever, and finally emerged with one measly bag.

  Heading back the way we came, I followed him again at a distance. He still didn’t ever look back, but for some odd reason I kept feeling the overwhelming urge to look over my shoulder. I did so a few times on our trek across campus, but saw nothing out of the ordinary. Seth passed the library and headed across 21st Avenue. Why in the hell would he have wound all over campus instead of just taking West End to 21st? Oh, right. Because there were a lot fewer college girls to flirt with on that route.

  For an even less interesting stop, he then went into the CVS Pharmacy. I wouldn’t find out much about him if all he was going to do all afternoon was run some lame errands. Didn’t impostors and serial killers have evil errands to run? I also had to use the restroom badly, so I decided to risk losing him and go at CVS. I made a beeline for the back of the store and quickly did my business, then hurried back outside. There wasn’t much cover for me on this side of the street, so I cut across the traffic and hid under the service portico attached to the back of the library. He would never see me over here. I was getting good at this spying thing.

  At least I thought I was, until a voice said, “Fancy meeting you here.”

  I froze. Shit. I was so busted. I turned, my heart stopping when I saw Johnny Brewer walking toward me. How in the hell did he find me? And why?

  Backing away from him, I said, “Do I know you?” I desperately hoped he wouldn’t recognize me without my slut costume.

  He grinned menacingly. “Oh, yeah, honey. You know me real good.” Johnny had crazy eyes. I hadn’t noticed before. Ol’ Ricky the bartender was right—I had messed with the wrong guy.

  Continuing to back away, I said shakily, “You must have me confused with someone else.”

  “You look different than you did last night, but I’d never forget those pretty green eyes of yours.”

  I had to get away from him, so I took off at a sprint. Johnny was fast, though. Way faster than I was. He grabbed me from behind before I could step out into the street.

  Whispering in my ear, he said, “You’re coming with me.”

  What kind of maniac would abduct a woman in broad daylight? I tried all of the tricks I could think of to get away—stomping on his feet, elbowing him in the gut, throwing my head back against him—but nothing worked. I was as vulnerable as I had been last night. He had an iron grip on my upper arms, so I couldn’t wind up enough to land a solid punch. In my panic, the only other thing I could think of to defend myself was to go limp and force him to carry me. I bent my knees and let my legs go slack, but that didn’t seem to faze him. He half carried, half dragged me along, toward a rusty old pickup truck. If I didn’t get away before we got there…

  Flashes of what he did to me last night invaded my mind again, and the grip of panic seized my chest. There would be no Pete to save me this time. I screamed. There were no pedestrians around to hear me, just people whizzing noisily by in their cars. If only I could get out into the street. I’d rather be run over than be subjected to whatever Johnny had in mind for me. I screamed again, as he continued mercilessly to pull me along with him.

  Suddenly, it felt like Johnny’s hands were being ripped off my arms. I spun around to find that Seth had Johnny in a headlock. I was never so happy to see Seth in my life. I’d happily trade one psycho for another.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing with my lady, punk?” Seth bellowed at Johnny. Once he was done saving me, I needed to make sure he understood that I was not his lady. Johnny struggled against him, but Seth easily had three inches and thirty pounds of muscle on Johnny.

  “Let go of me, asshole!”

  “Where were you taking her, huh?”

  Johnny stopped struggling for a moment to leer ominously at me. “Just someplace quiet where we could talk.” I shivered involuntarily. Both of these guys were creeping me out.

  Seth tightened his grip, and Johnny’s eyes bulged. “I don’t think so. Stay the hell away from her, or
next time, I snap your neck.”

  Snap his neck? Holy shit, Seth was scary! All I could do was stand there and shake.

  “Yes, sir,” Johnny croaked, looking a little dazed, probably from lack of oxygen. Seth roughly let him loose and shoved him toward his truck. Johnny stumbled over to it and got in. He roared away, but not before locking his eyes on me with one last threatening stare. An icy chill ripped up my spine, and I shivered again, in spite of the afternoon heat. I couldn’t imagine how Johnny had found me. And I wasn’t convinced that Seth’s threat would be enough to stop him from coming after me again.

  Seth came over to me and enveloped me in his arms. “Are you okay?” he asked kindly.

  “Yes,” I breathed, not returning his embrace. I was dangerously close to tears, with fear, disappointment, and anger all swirling around inside me. My heart rate was slowly returning to normal, but I was still shaking like a leaf. Speaking was difficult around the huge lump in my throat.

  “Good,” he replied, leaning back and holding me at arm’s length. He glared at me and yelled, “What the hell were you thinking? Why have you been following me all afternoon, and how did you get mixed up with that delinquent?”

  The last thing I imagined Seth was going to do was turn this around on me, and who was he to interrogate me at a time like this? I was the one who was supposed to be questioning him about impersonating Seth Davis! And how did he know I had been following him? Damn it! Did he have a Spidey sense or something? Eyes in the back of his head? Or maybe I was just a sucky spy.

  I wasn’t afraid anymore—I was just pissed. Blowing out an exasperated breath, I yelled back, “I’ve been following you because I want to know why you’re impersonating a college professor in order to pick up girls. Or maybe you’re a serial killer. I don’t know. Either way, you lied to me, and I don’t appreciate it!”

  Looking around warily, he pulled me back under some nearby trees and lowered his voice. “Shh. Not so loud. Look, you don’t know what’s going on here, and you need to keep your nose out of my business. Do you hear me?”

  “It’s my business if the guy who keeps asking me out and hanging around in my coffeehouse is a perv!”

  He shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “I’m not a perv, okay? Anyway, you need to stay away from that guy. He’s bad news.”

  “No shit.”

  “Juliet,” he said sharply, “you’re getting mixed up in something way out of your league. That guy was purposely following you. I don’t want you going anywhere alone.”

  “You are not the boss of me,” I huffed.

  His mouth lifted slightly in the corner. “You’re cute when you get angry.”

  “And you’re an ass, Seth. Wait. That’s not even your real name. Who in the hell are you, anyway?”

  He sobered up immediately. “That’s none of your business.”

  My eyebrows shot up. “Not my business to know what your name is? Whatever. But don’t blame me when the cops pick you up thanks to an anonymous tip.”

  His muscles rippled as he crossed arms over his chest and pointed out, “It’s not a crime to impersonate some horny professor.”

  I stopped. Hmm. I guessed it wasn’t against the law to lie to women to get them into bed. Well, it should be. “I could at least call campus security and have you banned from Vanderbilt property.”

  He blew out a breath. “If I tell you the truth, will you keep your mouth shut?”

  “Maybe.”

  He glared at me.

  I gave up. “Fine, I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

  “You can’t tell anyone what I’m about to tell you.”

  I nodded, figuring I’d tell Pete later anyway.

  “The truth is…” He sighed, obviously not wanting to tell me. “I’m a private investigator.”

  Rolling my eyes, I said, “Nice. I got scammed by a rent-a-cop.”

  “I said private investigator, not security guard!”

  He looked pissed, so I decided to taunt him a little. “Same difference.”

  “I just wouldn’t go calling people names, waitress.”

  Gasping, I retorted, “I’m the manager, thank you.”

  “Right.”

  “Well, Magnum P.I., what is it that you’re investigating? The average cup size of the American coed?” I asked sarcastically.

  “Very funny. And I’m not at liberty to say.”

  “Of course you’re not, Magnum.”

  “Don’t call me ‘Magnum’!” he shouted.

  “I don’t know your name!”

  “It’s Ryder.”

  I sighed. “Sure it is.”

  “I’m not joking.”

  “I understand that you don’t want me to know your real name because you’re ‘undercover’ or whatever.” I made air quotes to emphasize the ridiculousness of it all. “But you could have at least come up with a better name than Ryder. You sound like a vigilante in a bad action movie.”

  Through gritted teeth, he said, “Ryder is my real name.”

  “Whatever you say, Magnum.”

  “You know what? Maybe I shouldn’t have saved you from that scumbag, because you’re nothing but a big pain in my ass!”

  “At least I’m not a big fat liar!”

  “Shut up.”

  “You shut up.”

  Seth—or Ryder, whoever he was—grabbed my face with his hands and kissed me. Really kissed me. It was a genuine knee-buckling, swoon-worthy, forget-your-own-name smooch.

  When he released me, I had to shake my head to come back to my senses. I cleared my throat and said, “I’m going back to work now.” I tried to walk purposely away, but he caught my arm.

  “I’m driving you.”

  I complained, “It’s only a few blocks.”

  “I don’t care. You don’t go anywhere alone. Capisce?”

  “Now you’re acting like a vigilante in a bad action movie, too.”

  Ryder just growled and pulled me across the street. His car wasn’t parked too far away. He opened the door for me and stuffed me unceremoniously inside.

  “You know,” I pointed out, “you were a lot nicer when you were a horny professor.”

  That remark only got me more glaring. It was deathly silent for a moment, and then Ryder said, “I want to make it clear that you can’t tell anyone what I told you. No one can know that I’m not Seth Davis, college professor. It would jeopardize my entire investigation.”

  “It would probably help me to keep quiet if you told me what exactly you’re investigating,” I said sweetly, hoping to charm it out of him. I glanced around inside his car, hoping to find something that might clue me in on either his identity or his job, but found nothing. His car was immaculate, down to the perfectly polished black leather seats, without even so much as an empty soda can in the cup holder.

  “Nice try.”

  “Is it Dave’s murder? Wait, no. You were hanging around the coffeehouse before that happened. It’s something else with Dave, though, isn’t it? Was he into something illegal? Does he have some connection to the students at Vanderbilt?” Maybe the stolen mail in his hidey box from those three Vanderbilt students was important after all.

  He laughed. “You can guess all day, and you’re never going to figure it out. You’re a terrible sleuth.”

  “I figured out your little secret, didn’t I?”

  Glancing at me, he relented. “I guess you did figure that out, sort of, but you have no surveillance skills whatsoever. I knew you were tailing me today from the start. I also knew that someone was tailing you, and that you were completely clueless about it.”

  “Then why didn’t you do anything to stop him?”

  He shrugged. “I wanted to see how it played out.”

  “Dick.”

  Ryder grinned slyly. “You like me.”

  “Not even.”

  Thankfully, we were back at Java Jive. Without even saying goodbye, I hopped out and scurried into the sanctuary of the coffeehouse. I had never
been so glad to be back.

  Chapter 14

  My head was reeling from the sheer craziness of the afternoon. Lost in thought, I blindly filled orders and went through the motions at Java Jive. It was killing me to think that I had to keep everything I had learned a secret, especially from Pete. Oh, screw it. I was going to tell Pete the second he came through the door.

  The coffeehouse was busy for dinner, but nothing like the day before. When Pete came in—looking a lot happier, I might add—I snagged him and pulled him into the office.

  “Dude. You will never guess what happened to me this afternoon.”

  “Sara Evans came in?”

  I gave him a confused look. “No.” Pete had worked with her before, so he knew her. “Why, was she supposed to?”

  “Yeah, she told me she might drop by.”

  “Damn it! I was gone this afternoon.” I was a Sara Evans fan. Leave it to me to miss meeting one of the few country artists I actually liked.

  “Playing hooky already?”

  “No,” I said petulantly. “I guess I need to start from the beginning.” I told Pete all about Paolina’s mysterious credit card, and he looked increasingly worried as my story went on.

  “Jules, that sounds fishy. There should not have been a credit card in the pastry case in the first place. It sounds to me like someone was trying to hide it. Did you question all our staff?”

  “Yes. But, Pete, they won’t open up to me. I don’t know if they don’t like me or don’t trust me or what.”

  “I want to talk to each of them separately. Maybe someone will spill their guts to me. Why don’t you go ask Cole to come in here.”

  “Um…that’s not the end of the story. You know the guy you beat up last night?”

  He puffed out his chest a little and smiled. “Yeah.”

  “He followed me over to Vandy.”

  “What?” Pete exploded, jumping out of his chair.

  “He accosted me and tried to shove me into his truck.”

  “What?” Pete repeated, rushing over to kneel in front of me. He leaned in and scrutinized me intently, looking for any signs of damage. “Are you okay?”

  I didn’t want him to worry, but I needed a little sympathy. I certainly hadn’t received any from Seth…Ryder, I mean. “I’m fine. Thanks for your concern, but don’t worry. As luck would have it, I guess, Seth appeared out of nowhere. He got Johnny in a headlock and threatened to kick his ass if he bothered me again. Then Johnny left.”