I grabbed a hold of Brownie’s saddle, placed my right foot in the foothold, I hopped up swinging my left leg over. It felt so familiar but foreign at the same time. It’s been years since the last time I rode a horse. Before I knew it, we were off. I saw an opening to go toward the lake. The lake was always a place I loved to be. It was nice and peaceful and a great place to think. Before I knew it I was at the lake. Brownie slowed down to almost a stop and I guided her to the small half barn. Before I could wrap her rope around the wood beam I could hear someone behind the barn. I quickly tied Brownie’s rope around the beam and I started walking toward the noise. A few feet away I could see someone fixing up the old lake house. He was on top of the roof placing plywood and nailing it in place. He had a shiny coat of sweat over his shirtless body. He was wearing a fitted pair of light blue wrangler jeans. His hair was a little long and his bangs were almost in his eyes. It was a little hard to see the actually color of his hair from where I stood. But I could clearly see the outlines of his muscles and that sexy ‘V’ shape leaning to the mystery below.
I made my way closer to the lake house. I caught a few glimpses of his face and I tried to place a name to him. He looked oddly familiar but nothing came to mind. I could see him as a young teenager, then as a young adult. I knew that I knew him but I just couldn’t remember from where. He heard me walking to the lake house and he turned around. He looked at me for a moment and then placed a big grin on his face and that did it. That smile I could never forget. The warmth he showed told me exactly who he was. He’s Kyle, Lyn’s best friend, and my summer crash and my ex-boyfriend, the one guy who I couldn’t fully be with, the one I had to always leave.
“Amy, it’s been a while.” He waved at me to stop “Stop right there. I’ll come down.” I made my way to the porch and sat on the wooden swing. Kyle walked around the house and saw me. Our eyes met and it felt as if I never left. It felt as if this is where I should be. I blinked and took a deep breath “So you’re fixing up the old lake house I see.” Kyle opened his ice chest to grab a couple bottles of water and handed me one. “Yeah, I guess I am. It’s going to shit and I would hate to see it go to waste. I’m hoping to make this my home when I’m done.”
“That would be nice. You always loved being by the lake. I remember us coming here at least three times a day during the summer. I those were the good ol’ days.” Kyle nodded and sat on the porch’s wooden railing and leaned against the wood beam. “Yeah, those were the good ol’ days before everyone grew up and went away. So, did you ride Brownie down here?”
I could tell he was trying to avoid those last few memories we shared together. I could see a little of the hurt in his eyes before he changed the subject. I just couldn’t understand why he was feeling hurt and I wanted to know but I didn’t dare ask. Not now at least. I looked down at my water and opened it. I took a long drink before answering “Yeah, she’s tied up at the half barn. When Uncle Chris brought me to see Aunt Tammy, she was about to take Brownie out for a run. When she saw me, she asked if I would like to take her.”
There was a long silence between us. It felt like Kyle wanted to ask me something but he had changed his mind. He stood up and walked toward me. Kyle is so handsome and he still looked a little like that young teenager I knew during the summers. He was about three years older than me. He’s tall, six feet, and his hair was a darker black due to the sweat. His eyes were what always got me. They were a piercing green which picked up every angel of the light. He sat next to me and I could smell his axe deodorant and a pure male scent. Another thing that felt so familiar but so foreign.
He sighed out loud and looked at me “Lyn told me what happened.” Kyle placed a hand on my leg “I’m so sorry you had to go through that.” He looked into my eyes searching for something. Kyle shook his head and looked at his feet “I wish I could take your pain away Amy.” Then he looked back at me with anger in his eyes. “When Lyn told me the way you sounded on the phone, I wanted to beat the fuck out of someone. Out of him. You’re a good person Amy. I just can’t understand why he would do this to you.” I placed my hand on top of Kyle’s and looked into his eyes. “There’s nothing you can do Kyle. It’s something that was happening for a while. It was something I should have seen before it happened. We had our problems and differences but…” Before I could finish I felt a tear dropping from my eyes and down my face. Kyle wiped away the tear with his thumb and pulled me into the pocket of his side and underarm. “I should have known he was having an affair with someone. I was so stupid. I was stupid when I first met him and I’m stupid for allowing him to hurt me like this.”
I wrapped my arms around Kyle’s waist and pulled in a little closer. Kyle kissed the top of my head. “It’s going to be okay. Everything will turn out for the better. You’re here now and have family and friends around you to help you heal.” I looked up and saw softness in his eyes. I choked back some of my tears “Are you one of the friends that will help me heal?” Kyle smiled a small smile “Yes, I could be one of those friends if you would allow me too.”
“Kyle, I’m sorry for the way things were when I left. I just want you to know that…” Before I could finish he placed a finger on my lips “Shhh, not now Amy. We can talk about that later at a different time. Right now it’s about you and helping you heal.” All I could do was smile at Kyle. He was so sweet and completely different from David. Kyle held me like he would never let me go. It felt like I belonged in his arms. It always felt that way even when we were kids. But I always ran away from those feelings. At one point I did allow Kyle to get close to me but I couldn’t fully be with him if I didn’t fully love myself for who I was. I would always put a smile on my face to show I was happy but deep down I wasn’t. I was fighting with my self-esteem and the way my body looked. I was always the big girl in the group, even though I was fit. But no one saw that, all they would see was my size. But Kyle was different. He saw me and not a size.
I could easily hear Kyle’s voice which brought me back to reality. “I’m sorry Kyle, what did you ask?” Kyle smiled at me “It’s okay. I could see you were in a deep thought. I asked if you had any plans for dinner tonight. If not, I would like to take you to my restaurant.”
“So far, I don’t have any plans. Lyn was supposed to be home tonight but she got caught up at work and won’t be able to make it until tomorrow.” I paused for a moment to think about what Kyle said. His restaurant? I didn’t know he had a restaurant. Or was it his favorite place to go and thought of it like it was his?
“Wait, your restaurant? Do you own a restaurant?” Kyle laughed a low laugh “Yeah, I own a restaurant. Actually, I own two in Dallas and one in Austin. My business partner and I plan to open one in New Orleans or Lafayette soon.” I was shocked at the information I was hearing. I knew Kyle was going to college to become a teacher but I didn’t know he had switched careers. Kyle noticed the shocked look on my face and smiled at me “After a year of college, I decided teaching wasn’t my thing. So I dropped out and started at the Culinary College. I loved cooking and I was great at every assignment. My cousin and I decided to open a small restaurant in Dallas. It was doing so well that we decided to open another one on the other side of Dallas close to his home. From there we’ve just been expanding.” I could see the pride and excitement in his eyes. I haven’t seen this Kyle since I was ten and he was almost fourteen. I loved this look on him and it made me feel a fire in my belly I was not expecting to feel.
“I would love to go to dinner with you. Let me get Brownie back and get cleaned up. What time would you like to leave?”
“I can pick you up at seven. Are you staying with your aunt and uncle?” I looked up at Kyle with a smile. “Of course I am, where else would I stay?” Kyle looked down at me with a devilish grin “I should have known. That makes it a lot easier for me to come and see you.” The feeling in my belly moved a little lower when he said that. Come and see me or me come and see you? Was he up to his old tricks again? I guess I would have to wa
it and see.
I stood up and Kyle pulled me into a hug “I’ll see you at seven then.” I nodded my head yes and looked up at him “Seven it is.” I walked toward the half barn to grab Brownie and rode back to my aunt’s stables. Now that I wasn’t so close to Kyle I could fully breathe. He always had a way of taking my breath away. I always felt comfortable around him. I could be myself around him and knew he wouldn’t judge me no matter what size I am. This is good. This is a new beginning. I kept telling myself on the ride back to the stables.
CHAPTER THREE
When I got back to my aunt and uncle’s I took a nice a long bath in the jacuzzi tub. When it was almost four thirty I got out and dried off. I put some curl gel in my hair so my waves would look a little more like curls, then I started on my make-up. Once done, I started going through all the clothes I had in my suitcases. I started to put some clothes away and picked out the matching bra and panties I wanted to wear. I hung what needed to be hung and looked for some nice going out on a date clothes. I didn’t know what to wear and I had no clue what type of restaurant we were going to. So, I decide to call Lyn. Maybe she could help me out.
The phone rang a few times before Lyn picked up “Amy, I was wondering when you would be calling me. I just got off the phone with Kyle.” I laughed a soft laugh into the phone and sighed. “Yeah, I figured he would call you.” Lyn laughed a loud laugh “Well he’s pretty excited about this ummm….date. If you want to even call it that. Then he started to tell me all the things he had planned with-in a few hours after you went back to the farm house.”
“Wow, he must be excited, huh?” I laughed again before continuing “I was wondering what I should wear? I have no clue what kind of restaurant he owns. So I need your help.”
“He didn’t tell you anything about it? I mean that’s like his baby and all.”
“He really didn’t say much. He just told me he dropped out of college, started at the Culinary College, and that he owned a few restaurants.”
“Well he and his cousin are partners and their restaurant’s name is Country Boys Steakhouse. It’s relaxing and a little fancy. I know he plans to take you out afterwards but I’m not going to tell you much about that part. Just wear something sexy but nothing like a dress.”
“Well that leaves only dress pants and jeans. What about dress black shorts? Would that work?”
“Yeah, that should work.” Lyn laughed “You know this reminds me of all the times when you would go out on dates and call me asking what you should wear.” I laughed “You’re right. I never had any clue what to wear on dates. Thank God I have a cousin who is a fashionista. Thanks again Lyn. See you tomorrow.”
I hung up my cell phone and placed it on the night stand. I walked over to the dresser to pull out my black dress shorts. Then I walked over to the closet to grabbed my deep purple slip on wedges. I looked in the closet and found my lose fitted sleeveless dress shirt with a big pink a purple floral pattern. While I was getting dressed I heard the doorbell ring and felt butterflies in my belly. I’m nervous. This is Kyle, I shouldn’t be nervous.
When I made it to the front door, I saw Kyle talking to my uncle. Kyle was so handsome dressed in a button down blue-gray shirt with the top button undone. His hair was slicked back and he had on a pair of dark blue dress jeans, if there is such a thing. Kyle turned around to greet me “Wow Amy, you look beautiful.” I walked closer to Kyle and he pulled me into a hug. “Thanks, is this okay or should I wear something else?” Kyle stepped back to look me up and down. When his eyes met mine I could see the lust in them. He wanted me. Me? No I must be imaging things.
“No, this is perfect. Did you talk to Lyn?” I ducked my head a little and laughed “Yeah, I did. I called her asking what I should wear.” My Uncle Chris cleared his throat “You two have fun now. The wife and I will be home. Amy if you need anything just call.” I hugged my uncle and Kyle and I walked out of the house to his car.
Kyle’s car was a brand new, all black, Dodge Challenger. “Is this yours?” Kyle placed his hand in the small of my back and pushed me to the passenger side and opened my door for me. “Yeah, it’s mine. I got it a few months ago. The old Dodge Ram finally took a shit. So I had to get something to drive back a forth.” I turned to slide into the car. Kyle made his way around to the driver’s side and got in. I turned to face him “It’s really nice. It still has that new leather smell. I’m thinking about trading in my car once I get to Louisiana. I’m still unsure on what I want to get.” Kyle started the car and pulled out of the driveway. “So, how long are you planning to stay here in Texas?” I looked down at my hands and looked back up at Kyle “About two weeks, then off to Louisiana. I’m planning on staying with Tiffany for a few months until I find a house to buy. Then I’m going to open up my own business.”
“That’s great. Maybe we can get together when I’m down with the new restaurant in Louisiana.” Kyle glanced at me and I smiled. “Do you know when you will be there and where?” Kyle shook his head “Not too sure just yet. We want to get the Austin restaurant stable first and then we will start making plans for the new one.” I nodded at Kyle and turned to look out the window. The rest of the way into Dallas was a silent one.
****
We arrived at Kyle’s restaurant a little after seven. Country Boys wasn’t too small but not that big either. The walls were a dark gray with white trim. The waiters had on a white button down, long sleeve, shirt with black slacks and a black neck tie. I felt a little underdressed when I stepped into Country Boys Steakhouse.
We were escorted to our table and Kyle ordered a bottle of wine and a small flat bread pizza as an appetizer. Kyle poured some wine into my wine glass “So how is it so for?” I looked up at Kyle to see him with a grin from ear to ear. I could tell he wanted my approval, but why? He sure doesn’t need my approval at all. “It’s wonderful. Everything on the menu sounds like it would be amazing. Makes it hard to choose what to get.” I smiled at Kyle and he reached over to place his hand on top of mine. “Then choose everything. That’s the best part of being the owner. You don’t have to choose just one thing.” He called over our waiter “Can you have the chef make a sample of everything. Also tell him if he needs my help to let me know.” The waiter nodded and walked into the kitchen.
While we were waiting on the first round of our food to come out we talked a little about my mother. My mother was the sweetest and kindest person I know. She did any and everything for someone she really cared about. Before she was diagnosed with breast cancer, her dream was to open up a sewing boutique. I always wanted to help her with her dream but sadly she passed away about two years ago. Now her dream has become mine, but with a little difference.
When I told Kyle about my not so small fortune his eyes became big “Wow, so you’re a millionaire? I guess that’s good in a way. You wouldn’t struggle with the divorce.” I forced a smile on my face “Yeah I guess so. I really never thought I would be going through a divorce. I had plans to start my own business in California but now I will have to start it in Louisiana.” Kyle lightly rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb “What type of business are you planning on starting?”
I took a deep breath before answering. I wasn’t too sure what reaction I would get from Kyle. When I told David about my plan he would make an argument out of it. I guess it doesn’t much matter what he thinks now does it?
“You know how my mother was a seamstress before she passed? Well, I plan to continue in her footsteps. I would like to open up a custom lingerie boutique. So many women just can’t find the right bra or panties and I want to help them. ”
“That would be great. You were always good at sewing.” Kyle smiled a kind, bright smile and I returned the same smile. “I hope so.” Right then, our samples of food arrived and all I did was eat. It was so good and I couldn’t get enough of it. I was so happy everything was one or two bites. Once we finished one tray of food, the next would come out. We didn’t have a chance to finish talking but it didn’t m
atter much.
Kyle was watching every bite I took to see what my reaction would be. I felt a little embarrassed with him watching me eat but the look in his eyes washed it away. The look he was giving me was pure desire, want, and need. I couldn’t help wonder why in the world he would look at me like this. When we were younger, he knew I had a crash on him and I knew he cared for me, but we were only together for almost a year. Before I moved to California we had a huge argument that left me thinking he hated me. I held Kyle’s gaze and took a sip of wine. “Kyle, we need to talk about the last time we spoke. About what happened?”
Kyle took a deep breath and ran his hands through his hair. “I was hoping we didn’t have too. Amy I just want to forget about all of that and move on. Can we just start over?”
“I’m sorry but I can’t forget about it Kyle. You hurt me by what you said. You called me fat, a bitch, and so many other names. You also said you would never be with me again if I left. Then you told me you slept with Lyn a few days after our big fight. God Kyle, we were together. You were my first. My first at everything. We could have made it work. We could have…” I took another sip of wine trying to calm down. Then Kyle put both hands in mine and looked deep into my eyes “We could have gotten married and had a family. I could have moved with you to California but it wasn’t right for me. There’s a lot of ‘what ifs’ I think about all the time Amy. I was so hurt and the thought of you moving so far away it got to me. I’m so sorry for hurting you like that and I’m sorry for sleeping with Lyn. I have no clue why I did that. It was stupid, I was stupid.”
My Journey (Amy's Way) Book 1 Page 2