Alien Mister Fourth of July

by Serena Spacey

  “Mankind knows what it’s doing by a decent age,” I agreed with Dexx. It wasn’t something I would have looked at though, until I met Alicia. “Have you ever thought of buying a Courtezan?”

  Dexx choked on his beer a little. “Are you kidding me? No. I mean?” He stopped to think. “A paid for girlfriend just to us. Is this about the Earthling? I’ve never heard of a Champion Adventurer buying an Earthling before.”

  Same set of rules should apply. If I bought Alicia Alamillo, that would be the end to her parents rule over her. We would be responsible over ourselves. Her parents would have a seizure if I offered something for her though. Not to mention, Earth. Her planet. I couldn’t just take her away from everything she ever knew.

  “Eighteen, Hey,” Dexx said to me as he gave me a beer. “You met a girl once on Earth you liked at eighteen. You might want to slow down a bit. At least Earth has us beat on sensibilities, much better than the fucking Rim where I live, or their models of heroes.” He glared and stood up as he yelled at other guys having a good time. “Brack, hey! My little brother Maxx is right over there. Can we not chase naked girls around the pool right now?”

  Yeah. My heart felt differently, but he was right. There was no way a mere Earthling was going to feel the same way. Still? Even now, I didn’t see a different future with anyone else, and if they did change the Age of Independence to 30? Then the earliest I could pay is 24. But saying that, ‘paying for her’. Courtezan’s were more often than not girlfriends, used usually for Adventurers that didn’t want to trust just anyone with their money and secrets. Over the course of a year, 21% of Adventurers would be married and divorced within a week because their wives were trading secrets or trying to steal from them. Each year, a courtezan became more common with most of them being there of their own free will. Still. To ‘buy’ Alicia? No, I better wait. He was right.

  Earth

  ~Mister Fourth of July~

  It always felt strange, acting like an Earthling. I had to take my mannerisms, my words, and my actions down a few years. I wasn’t allowed to wear my normal uniform unless I was in the middle of an emergency, and there were rarely emergencies on Earth. So I was dressed down in my usual for this little planet. Some cut-off jeans, shorts, and a muscle shirt again. This was the same outfit from last year too, but I only wore this once a year and no one complained.

  Candace said Alicia would be at the pool party this year, so I got there as quickly as I could. No time to dawdle, she could be over at any minute. She complained I acted more like a fifteen year old boy crushing on a girl than an almost twenty year old guy.

  No one else cared that the pool side fun began a little earlier than usual. I waited, trying to look like I was having fun sitting on the rim of the pool when she showed up on the side of the house. How did anyone ever take their eyes off her? She was a knockout. Her shirt was a hot red pullover, this time with no tie on the back. The whole shirt was just a hulking, thick rubber band material to me, and her shorts weren’t helping the situation. I couldn’t even imagine what she’d look like when she was in a swimsuit. I dunked myself in the pool, aware of the strength of the thoughts I had been experiencing. At my family reunion too, I had to get into that cold pool fast before anyone noticed my problem.

  Candace ran toward Alicia, her wet feet plopping against the cement. “Come on,” she urged her. “Get your swimsuit on, we’re having a blast.” She took her inside to get changed. After I had my situation under control, I got out of the pool and headed to the inside. I got an earful from Aunt Cheryl about bringing wet feet into her house. I apologized, I didn’t know what I was thinking. I seemed to lose my common sense whenever Alicia was in the picture. I came back out and saw her right in front of me. From the back she had a bikini swimsuit that was green and blue. I tapped on her shoulder.

  “What?” She looked back at me in surprise.

  The goofiest grin must have hit my face as I stared at her. “Hi, Miss Fourth of July.”

  She laughed. I wonder if my face had been as goofy as I thought. “Hi, Mister Fourth of July.”

  Candace laughed at the two of us, and we both looked at everyone in the pool. They didn’t get the joke, but all eyes were on us.

  “Let’s go swimming,” I said to get us out of that awkward situation. It would probably be best if we called each other by our names again. We both sunk into the pool, and I was glad to be in there again. There wasn’t a word to describe Alicia. Heavenly sounded dorky, and not as sexy. Sexy wasn’t strong enough though, there was more to it than her looks. Nothing fit except the word comfortable. Yeah, comfortable.

  We played a game with a jumbo beach ball, and a few of us played a racing game. I participated, but I ended in second place. It didn’t matter though because as I was racing, someone else came up to Alicia. Blast, it was Kyle.

  “Hey,” he said as he tried to shake her hand. “I’m Kyle, a distant cousin of Candace’s. You’re Alicia, right?”

  She shook his hand politely, but she looked uncomfortable, and I didn’t blame her. Kyle was twenty-four years old, what did he think he was doing?

  “I like your swimsuit,” Kyle said as he gestured toward her. “Fourth of July-ey. I like a girl who can get into the holidays. Are you going to be around the whole day?” He set his hand on her shoulder, no way was that gonna fly.

  I couldn’t help myself as I went over and pulled his hand off her shoulder. Hard.

  “Kyle.” My voice was like gravel. I couldn’t flat out say what I wanted to say, so I let my tempo do the talking. “I think you’re wanted inside.”

  Kyle looked over at Alicia, then at me. “I’ll see you around.” He headed toward the house, and I couldn’t help a groan.

  “Sorry. Kyle’s one of those go getters,” I apologized for him. “He’s friendlier than he should be. He wouldn’t hurt you though.” He was sleazy, but he wouldn’t. Didn’t mean I had to let him get that close though.

  “Kyle’s sleazy, I hear he went through nineteen girlfriends this year,” Candace complained as she came over. “He’s a decent cuz, but I can’t believe he just hit on you. Seriously, at a family gathering?” She groaned and looked between Alicia and I. “There are only two people I think that should be hitting on each other.” She laughed and went back inside.

  ~Alicia~

  I hate it when she does that. I went back inside to go ahead and change too. Getting out of the swimsuit seemed like a good idea for now. Kyle came up to me as I was heading to Candace’s room again. Did I have to get a leech, today of all days? I had to be polite and respectful, this was a family event I was invited to. I was a little used to leeches. The guy couldn’t be flirting with me all night though, it would be uncomfortable.

  “Hey,” he said as he came over. “You getting out of your swimsuit already? The fun was just beginning.”

  “For awhile,” I offered him. “Maybe I’ll get in later if I feel comfortable.” I leant on the word comfortable a little harder, hoping he would get the hint. He started to speak again, but I opened the door and stepped into the room, closing the door instead. I waited to hear him walk off, but he didn’t. I locked the door and got undressed out of the swimming suit back into my regular clothes. I still hadn’t heard his footsteps leave though.

  “Kyle,” I heard Candace’s voice through the door. “What is your problem? You are older than my friend, stop flirting with her.”

  “I wasn’t,” Kyle tried to say as he sighed. “Okay, I was. Do you blame me though? There’s like twenty girls in my whole school. I don’t have a large school like yours. I’ve only got five girls my age and two are my sister and cousin.”

  “Yeah, uh huh,” I heard through the door from Candace. “You’re too heavy on the flirting, you’re older, and well, someone else is interested in her.”

  “What, Vinnie?” I heard Kyle say through the door. “Doesn’t he have like a girlfriend back home?”

  “It’s complicated.”

  My heart felt like it was cracking as
I heard those words. Vinnie had a girlfriend. He had someone that he talked to and saw every day. He had someone that he wouldn’t just meet on the Fourth of July. Of course he did, why wouldn’t he? I should have a boyfriend. It’s not like we were even a couple. Two strangers, one night every year. I tried to stop my eyes from getting watery, but I couldn’t help it. I should have been his girlfriend. If I lived where he lived, I would have been!

  But was that fair to say? I didn’t even know this other girl. She could be special, someone who cared for him. I had no right to say or think the way I was acting. Something still popped inside me though. I had come for him, and I had tried so hard for him. He didn’t care though, why would he? I was just a fun friend, Miss Fourth of July. One day a year.

  I cleared my eyes and came back out.

  “Hi,” Kyle said even more brightly than before. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but do you want to go shoot off some fireworks early?”

  I fully blame it on my confused, mixed up, and currently broken heart as to why I nodded my head. Even Candace looked like I was crazy.

  “Really?” Kyle stood up straight. “Great, come on, let’s go. I’ve brought all kinds of fireworks.”

  Knowing I couldn’t say yes one minute and no the next, I said it sounded exciting. Candace touched me on the shoulder.

  “You’re kidding me,” Candace almost hissed. “My cousin, Kyle? I thought you had a thing for Vinnie. You know, Vinnie? The guy who shared about his real self just last year to you?”

  “I’m fine,” I struggled to answer. “It’s just fireworks.”

  “If it’s because of the girlfriend remark,” Candace warned, “it’s not what you think, Alicia.”

  I didn’t know what she meant, but Kyle grabbed my hand, eager to get to the fireworks. “It’s the Fourth of July, and we are going to set this town on fire. Whoo!” He yelled down the halls.

  Oh great. I just had to end up with one of those guys.

  Chapter Four: No Need for Jealousy

  ~Mister Fourth of July~

  “Vinnie.”

  I looked behind me and saw Candace. She ran up to me and sat beside the pool. “What?”

  “It’s Alicia.” Candace puckered her cheeks. “She’s popping firecrackers with Kyle.”

  I couldn’t believe it, what did she just say? ”Why?”

  Candace got fidgety, like she shouldn’t say something. She groaned and rolled her eyes back. “Kyle mentioned that you had a girlfriend, and she went bonkers.”

  I blinked once, twice, three times trying to get this. It couldn’t be. I was the freak who was way into her, not the other way around. “Why?”

  “Because she likes you,” Candace said. “She likes likes you, like you like like her.” She chuckled. “That’s a lot of liking.”

  I fell into a daze for a moment. Alicia liked me back. We barely talked, we couldn’t even see each other more than once a year. And she liked me back. I wasn’t nuts or crazy. Did we have . . .?

  I got up, grabbed a towel and walked off. Candace said something else, probably criticizing her friend for liking me in the first place. I wasn’t any prize, that’s for sure. She did throw out a warning that I better not tell her that I know. Seriously? Like I’m going to prance up to her and go, I know you like me?

  I found them in the front yard, shooting off some air firecrackers. Oh man, it was grasshoppers. Those things freaked me out.

  “Whoo!” Kyle shouted in the air. “Did you see how far that went, Ally?”

  I had stopped because of the grasshoppers, but Alicia’s new nickname made me press on. Ally. Kyle had no right to call her Ally. I watched another of those freaky things turn red, then green, and flew into the air. I had to stop again. Alicia looked back and saw me. I gestured with my fingers to come over, but she didn’t move.

  “Firecrackers are awesome!” I watched Kyle light a firecracker in his hand and throw it to the ground. Alicia moved toward me this time.

  “Alicia?” I didn’t know what to say, I just needed to get her out of there. “I thought you said we’d work up to spinners.”

  “Yeah. Later,” she added. “I’m having fun with Kyle right now.”

  “Mm.” I looked over at Kyle. He didn’t deserve her attention. He didn’t wait for a whole damn year just to see her again. “You’re not comfortable around what he’s popping off.”

  “Not completely,” she had to admit. “It’s good practice though.”

  “Not that good of practice,” Candace interrupted us from the side. “Hey, Vinnie, I need to take Alicia away a second.” She grabbed her by the arm and yanked.

  When they left I headed over to Kyle. “Knock it off, Alicia isn’t yours.”

  “Well, she isn’t yours either,” Kyle said to me. “I was only trying to help anyhow. I’ve heard that you’ve gone kooky over that girl. You want to date her, and that’s not going to happen in a day. Now, me? I’m just trying to nail her, and that could happen. Candace technically has permissions for her right now, so anything could happen. She’s out from her parent’s grasp.”

  My fists tightened, and I swore I was going to punch Kyle if he didn’t knock it off. Now. I knew I shouldn’t, that was a completely illegal move for me. But.

  “Might even help you out if I shook her up a bit,” he added.

  That was all I could take. I took my fingers and thwacked him on the jaw. Lightly. I tried lightly. It was like knocking a pillow on someone. Not satisfying, but it worked. Since we were in the front, nobody saw but the message was clear to him as he held his jaw. He should have felt like he got a hard punch from a regular earthling, instead of a light pillow fight with my index finger and thumb. Realization dawned in his eyes and he backed off. Damn. That was so unfulfilling, I wish I could have hit him harder.

  I’d take that out on the next villain, that’s for sure.

  ~Alicia~

  “What the heck, Alicia?” Candace badgered me. “What are you doing with Kyle? I thought you liked Vinnie, this is mean. Not to mention you promised you’d move up to spinners this year with Vinnie. Not watch Kyle blow his hand off.”

  “I will,” I said. “Okay? It’s not like I don’t have all night. I can shoot fireworks with different guys because there’s nothing there between us.” Oops. I could see on Candace’s face I dropped the ball.

  “I told you that it wasn’t what you thought,” Candace warned me. “Vinnie dating is no different than if you did. Currently, for your information, he’s free. That doesn’t mean anything though because he might not be free next year. Is that going to keep you from coming back next year and popping more fireworks? Not like you can make a relationship,” she said as a comeback. “He’s here once a year, but if you like him, have fun. Okay? It’s not like your sixteen, your nineteen. Take the hero for a spin, or go get your hand blown off with Kyle. Whatever.”

  Selfish. She was so right, I was being selfish right then. I did like Vinnie, but I couldn’t honestly do anything else. What was I doing hanging out with her other cousin? I waited so long for this exact day, and I wasted it with Kyle. I was acting like a young, jealous child! I wouldn’t have long with Vinnie, and then it would take another whole year.

  It didn’t matter if he had a girlfriend or not, I couldn’t be it. I could be his friend though, and that would at least keep me going. I didn’t waste any time heading back to the pool. Vinnie was waiting on the side of it, still dressed. He was probably debating whether he should jump in or not from my behavior. “Hey.” I walked over toward him. “Still want to try some spinners?” I will never forget the smile that occurred on his face.

  “Yes, I’ve been waiting for spinners with you all day.” He took my hand, and we went inside to his guest bedroom. “I was beginning to think you didn’t want to.” He held out a single pack of spinners. “I have more, but this will work for now.”

  I wonder what firecracker it was that Vinnie must have got a hold of to have such a fear of fireworks? I took the opportunity to ask when
we went back outside. “Hey Vinnie, what exactly happened with you and fireworks?”

  Vinnie looked over to me as he was bending down to light the spinner. “What didn’t?” He lit the spinner and moved back to where I was. As the fires danced inside he said, “I was looking in the paper bag full of fireworks. My dad was above me lighting a punk with his lighter. He dropped the lighter, and it hit the paper bag.”

  I was shocked. Vinnie didn’t have a small burn like me. If the right thing had caught fire he could have had severe burns for the rest of his life. It might even explain where the scar near his nose had come from. “You’re a brave man.” It just popped out of my mouth, I couldn’t help myself. It sounded more like something a fifties woman would say on a TV show so thinking quick I added, “Mister Fourth of July.”

  Vinnie actually got a little red, he couldn’t hide it from me. “Well, thanks Miss Fourth of July.” We finished off the spinners, had our meal again, and before I knew it, we were at the fairgrounds. The dreaded hood appeared with him on it. One full year, and we were already back to the hood. This would be the last spot we’d be together until next year. Here, I had been stupid enough to waste a whole half hour with Kyle. Thank goodness Candace stopped me, who knew what else I would have wasted? We both got on the hood and lied down, watching nothing. There were no fireworks because of the ban, but the fairgrounds were where I agreed to meet mom and dad.

  “Alicia, before you go, hold out your hand.” He dug into his shorts pocket and placed something in my hand.

  I looked at it. It was a ring? It wasn’t the best looking ring.

  “I know it’s an ugly metal thing. Don’t worry about hurting my feelings about it. Open it,” he said, “but never open it unless I’m around. Okay?”

  I opened it. Inside, it was strange. It had a tiny picture of him in it and water swirling around in two different streams. One went clockwise, while the other went counterclockwise. “How is it doing that?”

  “I’m doing that,” he said with a sort of braggish look. “That’s easy for me. Anyhow, don’t ever open it without me except for an emergency.”