The Little Shop of Afternoon Delights

by Sarah Lefebve

  ‘What do you think he’s gone for?’ Lottie struggled with the seatbelt that had got trapped in the car door and was now doing its best to strangle her.

  ‘To bury the hatchet.’ Rory leaned across, released the belt and pulled the door shut.

  ‘Oh no, don’t say that, I mean, where is he going to bury it?’

  Rory laughed. ‘It’s about time they manned up and sorted this whole thing out. Do you think he’s really got the hots for Amanda?’

  ‘Don’t be silly.’ Lottie looked mortified, so shocked that she forgot the car was in gear, so it bunny-hopped then stalled. ‘She’s far too young, I’m sure he wouldn’t still do that. Would he?’

  ‘Well he is single.’

  ‘But, he wouldn’t. She’d have told me.’

  ‘Well if he’s going to go for a woman, it’s more likely to be her type than someone like Tigs, isn’t it?’

  ‘But he likes Tiggy, and she’s far more his type. And she looks after him. He can’t, he just can’t, that would be so, so embarrassing. It would be so gross if my dad fancied my friend.’

  ‘I was talking about Dom, not Billy, you silly pillock.’

  ‘Oh.’ Lottie restarted the car and giggled with relief. ‘Who said Dom has the hots for her? I mean, I thought Tom did, but I think that’s just Gran and Pip stirring things, she said he was just a friend. Amanda, that is, when she was showing me the plans. Gosh, the plans, I should have told Dad. Shouldn’t I? Christ, we better get a move on, where are the car keys?’ She groped in her jeans pocket, panicked when they weren’t there. Rory put a hand over hers. Stopped her dead.

  ‘They’re in the ignition, Lots. Calm down, it’ll be fine. But yeah, I think you should tell Billy about the plans, I can’t believe you didn’t.’

  ‘I was going to, and then you packed me up and I forgot all about it.’

  ‘Can we stop yakking and go and rescue your relatives? I’ve got a bill to settle with Dom, and I need to collect my horse, and then I really do need to get the horses back on their toes. We’d better swap your bone-shaker for my wagon and go in that. Kill two birds with one stone.’

  ‘Don’t keep saying words like “kill” and “rescue”.’ Lottie groaned. ‘You aren’t taking this seriously, are you?’

  ‘Lottie, Billy isn’t exactly the killer type, is he?’

  ‘But if someone’s desperate….’

  ‘He’s not desperate anymore.’ He dropped a kiss on top of her head. ‘But, if we ever get married, remind me we need to emigrate.’

  Married. He’d said the M word, and he’d said the L word the other day. And taken her for a weekend away. With a trembling hand, Lottie put the car into gear and wondered how she’d ever thought life in Tippermere was predictable.

  ***

  ‘You go and load your horse and I’ll find Dad.’

  ‘I’m coming with you. You don’t think I’m going to miss Dom trying to out-manoeuvre bronco Billy do you? In fact, where’s my iPhone? I need to video this, it could go viral on YouTube.’

  ‘I can hear them, in the school. Come on.’ Lottie grabbed Rory’s hand and headed towards the place she loved so much, with more confidence than she felt.

  It was odd to see her father and uncle squaring up to each other. She’d not seen them do more than pass the polite time of day for years. But they weren’t squared up it was more like they were both reaching out, but neither would take the hand that was offered.

  They both wanted to sort things out and she didn’t miss the look that was almost relief on her father’s face when she spoke, said she believed Uncle Dom. It was almost like she’d given him permission to relax, trust.

  ‘Amanda’s doing the place up, not selling it. She told me, showed me these plans that David’s dad has done for her. Well, she’s not selling yet, I mean. She might one day, she said she couldn’t make promises, but she wants to restore it, get rid of all the crap. So that means it won’t get bulldozed, doesn’t it?’

  ‘Sorry, what did you say?’ But it wasn’t Billy that looked surprised, or sounded like he’d just found out it was Christmas. It was Dom.

  Chapter 25

  ‘You’ve done what, Elizabeth?’ Pip stared at Elizabeth, raised an eyebrow and wondered if age just gave you the right to do whatever you liked. Or whether, which was more likely, the woman had always done exactly what she wanted.

  ‘I have got young Thomas’s car resprayed. It looked quite appalling, I’m sure you’ll agree. So little Tabatha drove it over. The gentleman I spoke to at the dealership was very helpful, in fact I think he was relieved. They sorted it in super-quick time.’

  ‘But she’s not old enough to drive; she’s not passed a test.’

  ‘Oh, the roads are quiet. It wasn’t far and she promised to be careful.’

  ‘And you want me to take it back?’

  ‘I do, dear. Well I can’t, with my arthritis and dodgy hip, can I?’

  ‘And he doesn’t know?’

  ‘Well, no, but he did agree to do me a little favour and give Amanda a lift to the wedding. So I decided I’d pay him back with a nice surprise.’

  Pip wasn’t sure. Elizabeth, as with many who had a similar upbringing, believed in looking after her money. This was obviously an investment, but she wasn’t sure why.

  ‘You’re up to something, aren’t you?’

  ‘Tut, tut, dear. Such a suspicious mind. And you’ve been up to something too by the look on your face.’

  Pip, who didn’t think she had got a look, did her best to match Elizabeth’s gimlet stare. ‘He won’t let you push him into Amanda’s arms, even if Folly Lake Manor is at stake.’

  ‘I wouldn’t dream of trying, Philippa. But he does like her, they have a lot in common. A nice boy, though he can be a bit ineffective.’

  ‘Do you mean affected?’

  ‘I know exactly what I mean. He’s not one to swim against the tide; his father liked to avoid the waves as well. But he was more than happy to agree to accompany the poor girl to the wedding.’

  Pip, who thought Amanda was far from a poor girl, was beginning to wonder where this was heading. The fact that Elizabeth’s extravagant matchmaking efforts, which had involved her having to practically bribe the press to run the story and photographs, had spectacularly backfired didn’t seem to have dented her enthusiasm at all.

  ‘But you do know he doesn’t even want to get married?’

  ‘I’m sure you know far more about that than me, dear.’

  Pip ignored the comment, and the accompanying look. ‘And you know that she’s thinking of staying? She’s asking David’s dad to look at restoring the place.’

  ‘Oh yes, I do know all about that. I think he’ll do a wonderful job, from what I’ve heard. Poor Marcus was rather uninformed in these matters. So sad, but at least he didn’t live long enough to do any lasting damage.’

  ‘Elizabeth!’

  ‘I do think they have a lot in common, that couple, and they do look a good match, don’t you agree? Right, now dear you wanted to talk about the music didn’t you?’

  Pip wasn’t sure now whether Elizabeth had completely discounted everything she’d said, had a shockingly bad memory, or was plotting something new. She decided it would probably be easier to interrogate Tom, who had none of the wiles or ability to mislead that Elizabeth had.

  ‘And then you can drop the car off for me.’

  ‘Won’t he be missing it?’

  ‘Oh no, he’s been busy up at Folly Lake Manor. I don’t even think he’s peeped into the garage.’

  ‘And how do I get back for my scooter?’

  ‘I’m sure you’ll persuade someone to give you a lift. How about that nice Irish chap?’

  Pip sighed. Was there absolutely nothing that Elizabeth didn’t know about?

  ***

  ‘She’s up to something.’

  ‘No news there, then.’ Tom grinned and gave his car the once-over. It definitely looked better, in fact any colour was better than the bright yellow t
hat Tamara had insisted on. She’d wanted to be noticed. Tom on the other hand liked understated elegance and to blend into the background.

  ‘I think even I might stand a chance with Lottie now. What do you reckon?’

  Pip rolled her eyes. ‘Can you give me a lift back there for my scooter? I mean, why couldn’t she have just called you and asked you to go and pick the damned thing up?’

  ‘I hadn’t got a car.’

  ‘Very droll. Well you’ve managed without for the last few days.’

  ‘Walking up to Folly Lake is one thing, but the hike up to Tipping House is pushing it a bit too far. Even for a man with my physique.’ He grinned, and Pip couldn’t help but join in.

  ‘So, she persuaded you to go with Amanda to the wedding? What about me? I might have presumed.’

  ‘You never presume anything, Pip. Besides, you and Lottie are helping out, so you’ll be going early. But, no, she didn’t exactly persuade me. I do have a mind of my own, you know.’ He quirked an eyebrow, waiting for her to dispute it.

  ‘Carry on, I’m not saying anything.’

  ‘I happened to mention to Elizabeth that I’d sort of arranged to keep Amanda company, keep the wolves at bay so to speak, and she had a double gin in celebration.’

  ‘She doesn’t need to be celebrating to have a double gin.’

  ‘And said she had a nice little surprise in store for us. Not everyone has an ulterior motive, Pip.’

  ‘Elizabeth normally does, though.’

  ‘I think she promised my mother she’d keep an eye on me.’

  ‘Ah.’

  ‘The plans that Amanda’s had drawn up for the place are amazing. It will be beautiful if the finished article lives up to the promise.’

  ‘Good for selling, I suppose.’

  ‘I’m not convinced she will; she does like it here. So, are the rumours true about you and the Irish chap?’

  ‘Can’t a girl even breathe around here without the rumours starting?’

  ‘Breathe maybe, shag in the woods, no chance.’

  ‘We spent one afternoon together, that’s all.’ And then a very uncomfortable sleepless night wondering whether it was best to avoid him, pretend nothing had happened or go for a full-frontal attack. Pip had always favoured a direct approach, but this time she’d been knocked off kilter. The whole episode had caught her unawares and afterwards she hadn’t known quite how to react, or how she felt. Mick confused her.

  She might have come to Tippermere to seek out fit horsemen, but since arriving she’d actually spent more time with fellow interlopers, like Tom or the guys in Kitterly Heath. Now that the real deal (even if he wasn’t exactly Cheshire born and bred) had swept her off her feet, she had the alarming desire to do a runner to the safety of the city, which wasn’t like Pip at all. The fact that Tom and Amanda had gravitated together was something she could well relate to.

  Chapter 26

  ‘You won’t breathe a word to anyone that this isn’t, you know, the first… I mean, they all think it’s the real thing.’

  ‘Of course I won’t, Sam. I promised.’

  Sam was pale underneath her fake tan, and her blue eyes shone out bigger than ever from her slim face. Not for the first time, she was panicking that her false eyelashes were about to get dislodged, and she’d fall flat on her face halfway across the lawn. Which, given the height of her heels and the amount of moss in the grass, was a distinct possibility. When she’d actually said ‘yes’ to David on a sunny beach, it had been perfect. This repeat performance for the papers was something altogether different. ‘Oh no, where’s Scruffy?’

  ‘Stop panicking. He’s with David.’ Which wasn’t entirely accurate, but given Sam’s state, probably the safest answer.

  Scruffy, the ring-bearer, had disgraced himself. Having suffered Tiggy’s tender care and ministrations (she was the only dog-groomer in the area) for two hours, he had been fit to burst. Luckily, the diamond and platinum rings had not yet been attached to his collar when he’d spotted the old tabby cat, who considered herself queen of the castle. She’d bolted, taking Scruffy perilously close to the wedding cake several times as they weaved in and out of table legs, through the herb garden until he was adorned with parsley and mint, and then on towards the ornate fountain, which had been turned on in honour of the occasion. The cat, having a strong aversion to water and an even stronger self-preservation instinct, bounced on and off the wall with surprising agility, given her age, but Scruffy did not. By the time the dog had clambered out of the water, the cat had taken refuge in a nearby tree and was watching the proceedings with disdain.

  Having dodged David and his father, Scruffy had had an irresistible urge to shake himself dry, which led to the waiting staff and the immaculate white table cloths having an impromptu shower. Weaving himself through the opposition, like a premiership footballer heading towards the goal, he went for a final sprint towards the newly dressed rose beds, where, with a bark of pure joy, he gave a victory roll. Tongue lolling, the manure- and herb-streaked dog finally surrendered himself to a giggling Tiggy, who offered a refund on the grooming bill. David said no. But when she offered to shut him in an unoccupied stable with a bowl of water and a bone, the answer was a resounding yes. The ring-bearer had been officially relieved of his duties.

  ***

  ‘Oh yes, sorry, I’m having palpitations here. It’s so nice of Lady Stanthorpe to let us get hitched here, isn’t it? After that mix-up at the other place. I mean, who’d have thought that horrible little man would have tried to make money out of us and sell tickets? Well, I know we’re not getting hitched exactly, but, well…’

  ‘Sam, slow down and breathe for heaven’s sake. You’re wearing me out. I know what you mean, and I promise not to breathe a word about you know what, and you can call her Elizabeth, you know.’ Pip paused. ‘But not Liz.’

  ‘Oh no, she told us all to call her Lady Stanthorpe. It’s wonderful isn’t it? She’s so posh. A real lady.’ Sam sounded wistful. ‘Do you think she’s met the actual, real Queen?’

  Pip sighed. ‘Probably.’

  ‘Can you see my knickers through this, babe?’

  ‘I can’t see anything through it, Sam. It’s satin.’

  ‘I mean, the line of them, I did wonder if I should ditch them? But then I thought, with the slit up the side, well if anything happened, and I wouldn’t put it past these photographers to hide under the rhodies and shoot up my skirt.’

  There were plenty of rhododendrons, the girl had a point, and it was rather a large slit, without which the dress was remarkably restrained and sophisticated.

  ‘I’d keep them on unless you want “bush” type headlines.’

  Sam giggled. ‘No bushes round here, babe. Where’s Lottie? She is here, isn’t she?’

  ‘Of course she is. Last time I saw here she was trying to stop an impromptu football match that Rory, Mick, David and Billy were trying to organise. They looked a right load of arses, except David of course.’

  Sam’s face fell. ‘Oh gosh, Davey’s not getting green streaks on his new white jacket is he? Those grass stains are hell to get out, you know. His agent will kill him if he comes out green.’

  ‘They can Photoshop the pics.’

  ‘Yeah, but they won’t, will they babe?’

  ***

  Amanda had been quietly dreading the wedding for more reasons than she could bear to list. The main reason, if she was honest, was that much as she loved Sam, and knew that her heart was very much in the right place, she just had a horrible feeling that the whole affair was going to be even more overblown than Marcus’s funeral. Which would bring back memories she’d rather leave buried. She was also very worried that Sam, in full matchmaking mode (which seemed to have built to a crescendo as the wedding day approached), might well lock her in a room with one of the football players and refuse to let them out until baby-making practice was in progress, or at the very least a date had been arranged.

  Samantha seemed to have seen her as a c
hallenge, sending her regular links to Facebook pages and Twitter feeds of just about every single (and some about to be single) premiership football player in the country, along with the odd golfer and one very memorable rugby player, who she really wished had taken selfies with more clothes on. It was very off-putting when you felt you just had to look again and enlarge the picture, just to make sure that what you thought you were looking at wasn’t something entirely different. Like a curledup mammal.

  And then there was the other, unavoidable situation. Where she just had to stop putting it off and explain what she had decided to do, where she had to admit once and for all how she felt… and then wait for the walls to crumble. It was strange, she’d always felt completely in control before, whatever the situation, always felt that she could handle things. But, for the first time, she was petrified, it was a risk. A bit like jumping off a cliff. Or getting on a horse…

  She’d told Lottie that this time it had to be perfect, and she knew perfect didn’t exist. But it had to be right for her; it had to be what she truly wanted. But that didn’t mean it was right for anyone else. For him.

  ‘We can go for a swift drink on the way, if you want?’ Tom was looking at her in that gentle way he had. He understood, he cared and that made such a difference. Elizabeth was a clever woman.

  ‘Wouldn’t it be a bit rude?’

  ‘We’ve got plenty of time, we won’t be late. We could sit in the beer garden at The Bull’s Head, drink Pimm’s and pretend we’re off to some posh do.’

  ‘We are.’ She grinned. ‘Does my bum look big in this?’

  ‘Nope, but I’m sure with a few more riding lessons it will flatten out a bit, then you’ll fit in fine.’

  ‘You’re so rude.’

  ‘I know, it’s part of my charm.’

  ***

  The Bull’s Head was packed to the gills with journalists discussing the best way to stake out the wedding, though most of them seemed to think that it was still being held in Kitterly Heath, which Tom and Amanda agreed was probably Elizabeth’s doing.