GUISES OF THE MIND

by Rebecca Neason

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  An Original Publication of POCKET BOOKS

  POCKET BOOKS, a division of Simon & Schuster Inc.

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  Copyright © 1993 Paramount Pictures. All Rights Reserved.

  STAR TREK is a Registered Trademark of Paramount Pictures.

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  ISBN: 0-7434-2110-8

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  Table of Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Chapter Twenty-three

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  Epilogue

  This book is lovingly dedicated to the regular Saturday Night Irregulars—or the irregular Saturday Night Regulars—to Donna, Jim, David, Lori, Dan, Del Scott, Elayn, Liza, Bob and Clarita. It’s always great fun.

  ——————————

  To David, Dan, Mike and Lenora, who have also read and reread, unselfishly giving me the benefit of their time, intelligence and expertise.

  To my family, who always believed I could write, even when I doubted it, and who taught me to believe in myself.

  Above all, to Stephen, husband and friend without peer.

  Therefore the wise man . . .

  . . . does not collect precious things.

  He learns not to hold on to ideas.

  He brings men back to what they have lost. . . .

  . . . Having and not having rise together.

  Difficult and easy complement each other.

  High and low rest upon each other. . . .

  Lao Tze, Tao Te Ching

  Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.

  Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

  Where there is injury, pardon,

  Where there is doubt, faith,

  Where there is despair, hope,

  Where there is darkness, light. . . .

  Saint Francis of Assisi

  It is logical that one should desire peace. Before a peace can be obtained, one must learn to rule one’s passions. To gain mastery over the emotions, one must first embrace the many Guises of the Mind. . . .

  Surak of Vulcan

  Chapter One

  THE YOUNG LIEUTENANT on the transporter platform looked at Troi with haunted, frightened eyes.

  “You’ll be all right, Geoff,” the counselor said, giving her voice more confidence than she felt. Standing behind her at the controls, the new transporter chief, Samantha Tuttle, cleared her throat.

  “The starbase is signaling, Counselor,” she told Troi.

  “Thank you, Chief,” she acknowledged without taking her eyes off her departing patient. “Doctor Fletcher will be waiting for you, Geoff,” she continued. “Everything is arranged. The Skylark will be here in thirty-six hours to take you back home to Beta Arcturus. Doctor Fletcher will be traveling with you. He has a copy of all your records and the doctors at the clinic are waiting. It’s almost over.”

  The terror in the young man’s eyes did not abate. He ran a dry tongue over his lips and tried to make his voice work.

  “Thank you,” he finally managed to say. “I’m sorry I . . . I wasn’t a good patient.”

  Troi smiled her best professional smile. “You were a fine patient. Just remember, there are no magic cures. Everything takes time.”

  The lieutenant nodded. Troi stepped back next to Chief Tuttle, who was still waiting to work the transporter controls.

  “Just a few more days, Geoff, and you’ll be home. Are you ready?”

  Again the lieutenant nodded. Troi touched Tuttle’s arm and the transporter chief’s hands moved across the board before him. There was a hum, a shower of light, and the lieutenant’s body began to fade.

  “Good-bye, Geoff,” Troi said softly as he disappeared. “Good luck.”

  “The starbase is signaling that Lieutenant Salah has arrived,” Tuttle told her.

  Troi looked up at her and gave a weary smile, then she turned away. It was over; there was nothing more Troi could do now except go back to her quarters and make the final entry on Lieutenant Salah in her log.

  Troi left the transporter room. Crew members greeted her as she walked down the corridor toward the turbolift and she nodded to them, but she did not truly see them. Her actions were automatic and professional, and unrelated to her thoughts, which were still of Geoff Salah. In her mind she still saw the look of scarcely controlled panic that had become etched upon his face in these last weeks.

  Troi had always known, and accepted, that Starfleet psych-profiles were not infallible. But even in its latent stage, this phobia should have been diagnosed, she thought for the hundredth time as she stepped into the turbolift and gave her destination to the computer. Geoff Salah should never have been on a starship. Yet he had been here. And she should have been able to help him. She had failed, and it hurt.

  Troi reached her quarters and stepped inside. Behind her, the door slid silently closed. Only then did she let her facade of professional calm slip away. Her shoulders drooped as she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. For a few, brief moments, the slender frame of Deanna Troi bore a resemblance to Atlas, bowed beneath the weight of the world.

  Then she took a deep breath and straightened her shoulders. She had work to do.

  She walked over to her desk and sat down. As she did, she touched a button on the computer terminal, switching it to silent recording mode; at this moment, even the pleasant artificial voice of the computer was more than she wanted to hear.

  “Personal log: Counselor Deanna Troi,” she began. “Stardate 45741.9. We have just concluded a six-hour layover at Starbase 212, where we picked up the passengers who will be traveling with us to Capulon IV and . . .” Troi stopped and drew another breath, searching for a way to express the finality she felt. “Where I lost a patient. On my recommendation, Lieutenant Geoff Salah has been granted extended medical leave to his home planet. It is unlikely he will ever be able to return to duty aboard a starship.”

  Troi sat back and closed her eyes again. A deep weariness washed through her. She was exhausted from all these weeks of trying to help Lieutenant Salah combat the sudden explosion of fear that had ripped apart his life and left his sanity tottering on the brink of extinction. His increasing paranoia had pounded in her brain each time they were together. As the manifestations of his pho
bia grew, Troi had found herself having to battle through the attacks of anxiety and sleeplessness, the lack of concentration and the burgeoning sensation of impending doom that were Salah’s symptoms—not her own.

  Nor had she been able to tell Salah that his fears were groundless. It was a reality that the Enterprise, that any starship, traveled through a vacuum. The dangers of such travel—systems failures, hull breaches by asteroid bombardment or enemy fire, unknown and sometimes hostile life-forms, ion storms, novas and supernovas, and a thousand other things, were too varied to name. They were the conditions one accepted when one chose a life in Starfleet. They were part of the adventure.

  And they were the very things Lieutenant Geoff Salah could no longer endure.

  Once more the specter of his pained and troubled expression rose up to haunt Troi, bringing with it another wave of weariness. Depression sent its first wispy tendrils through her brain, whispering to her of futility and failure.

  Troi ended the entry. Later, after she had brought her own feelings into focus, she would record more. She took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and called up the schedule for her afternoon appointments.

  The first one, only a few minutes from now, was with Bio-tech Theodore Aske and Chief Roberta Plummer of geo-sciences. Standard voluntary prenuptial counseling. Troi gave a small, wan smile, glad that these were the next people she had to face. There had been nothing in her past three sessions with Aske and Plummer to indicate anything ahead for them but a long, happy marriage.

  Reading the next name on her schedule, Troi’s dark eyes grew troubled. Ensign Johann Marshall. More pain to deal with—grief and guilt and anger. In the month since Marshall had received word of his father’s death and began coming to Troi for counseling, these emotions had been the essence of their time together. Denying that he felt anything but loss and sorrow, Marshall would often sit in her office saying little. Then his dark, brooding emotions would fill the room and reverberate through Troi’s mind.

  She would endure them, though she knew she could raise her mental shields and place a firm, protective wall around her empathic talent. Yet, then she might miss some vital clue as to why the ensign’s self-accusations were greater than his grief. Until that was brought into the open, Ensign Marshall would not heal. Troi did not want to fail with Marshall as she had with Salah. She knew she would keep her shields lowered.

  “And who counsels the counselor?” she wondered aloud as she stood and composed her body into the posture of a confident professional—shoulders back, chin lifted—and mentally prepared herself to go to her office and face the rest of the day’s appointments.

  The comm button on her uniform chirped. She tapped it lightly. “Troi here,” she said.

  “Counselor.” The rich timbre of Captain Picard’s voice came over the comm channel. “Tomorrow evening at nineteen hundred hours, I will be hosting a dinner party to welcome our guests on board. If you have no other plans, I would be pleased if you would attend.”

  Always on call, the words flashed through Troi’s mind. Even at a social event like a dinner party, she knew that the captain would expect her to be sensing the emotions of the people in the room. He did not understand; no one on board the Enterprise fully understood how exhausting such constant sensitivity could be.

  Troi tried not to let these thoughts sound in her voice when she answered the captain. “Thank you, sir,” she said. “I’ll be there.”

  Picard signed off. Troi stepped toward her door, and as it slid silently open she knew that tonight she was going to treat herself to her favorite form of personal therapy. As soon as she was off duty, she was going straight to Ten-Forward and have Guinan make her this galaxy’s biggest, gooiest, chocolatiest . . .

  Up on the bridge, Captain Jean-Luc Picard was feeling very pleased with life as he settled himself comfortably into his command chair. Their passengers, the Little Mothers, were remarkable individuals—members of an organization that had lasted through the centuries. Picard knew that many of his contemporaries, while admiring the work of the Little Mothers, felt that religious organizations such as theirs were anachronistic. Picard did not agree. As a student of history, he was keenly aware of the part religion had played in the spread of civilization.

  Picard was too honest a researcher to ignore or deny the many atrocities that had been committed in the name of religion. Earth’s past was as studded with them as many other worlds’ histories, and much more than some. Yet it was the organizations of religion that had kept the light of law and learning, the essence of civilization, alive during eras of darkness that might otherwise have seen those lights extinguished.

  The Little Mothers—now theirs was a history that exemplified what Religious Orders could be. Picard had first learned of them as a schoolboy and had admired them since. Over the years he had watched for any mention of them, both in history books and current Federation news communiqués. The Little Mothers’ work with the unwanted children of the galaxy, regardless of physical or mental condition, of species or planet, was legendary and inspirational. Picard was pleased to be able to introduce them to his crew—and to introduce his crew, of whom he was justly proud, to them.

  Picard turned and found his First Officer watching him. “Your expression reminds me of an old saying about a cat and a canary,” Riker said, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

  “Yes, Number One, I am pleased. By our passengers, and by our mission.”

  “That’s something I don’t quite understand, Captain,” Riker continued. “We’re going to Capulon IV for the signing of the final treaty between that planet and the Federation—”

  “Yes.”

  “Why are we taking two nuns with us?”

  Picard studied Riker for a moment, then gave a small, enigmatic smile.

  “ ‘One man with a dream, at pleasure,

  Shall go forth and conquer a crown;

  And three with a new song’s measure

  Can trample an empire down.’ ”

  “Captain?”

  “A poem, by a nineteenth-century Irish poet named O’Shaughnessy. It means that a small number of individuals with vision and dedication can make or change history. From what I have read of the young King on Capulon IV, I think he is such an individual. It is my guess, Number One, that the King intends, with the help of these nuns, not to ‘trample an empire,’ but to build one.”

  Chapter Two

  JOAKAL I’LIUM, the King of Capulon IV, walked down the corridor toward his apartments on the third floor of the palace. He walked with an easy, long-legged gait, the walk of someone accustomed to few obstacles. He was clothed in the colors of the House I’lium. A long crimson tunic with full sleeves, gold buttons and sash gave breadth to his slender shoulders, and the loose pants, also of crimson, that gathered at the ankles inside his boots added height to his medium frame. His dark hair was worn long in back, in the fashion of young men. Wisps of it curled around the high neck of his tunic and touched the cropped beard and mustache that hid the fine lines around his mouth and made him look younger than his twenty-nine years.

  By his side walked Aklier, member of the Council of Elders. He was dressed in a similar style to Joakal, but in the orange and brown of his own House, and wore the knee-length sleeveless vest of adulthood.

  Aklier was shorter than Joakal and more stout. At the age of sixty-seven, the proud carriage of early manhood that was so much a part of his companion’s walk, had long departed from Aklier. His shoulders were stooped and his feet no longer left the floor as sprightly as once they had. His hair and beard were the dark silver gray of black hair aged. Although his beard hid many of the lines that had embedded themselves on Aktier’s face, he knew those lines existed and were growing deeper with each passing year.

  As the two men walked side by side down the palace corridors, their boots clicked dully on the stone floor, punctuating the silence of the late hour. Joakal hardly noticed the sound, nor did he give much thought to his companion. His mind w
as filled with details of his upcoming coronation and with the dreams and plans he had nurtured for so long.

  For nine years, ever since his father had died and Joakal came to the throne, he had ruled through the Council of Elders, as was the custom of his people. Now his Coming to Age was only a short time away. In twenty-seven days he would be thirty years old, and three days after that he would be crowned Absolute.

  For the last nine years Joakal had dreamed of the changes he would make for his people. He had spent those years, and many years before them, studying the laws and the histories, and making plans. They were secret plans, for the changes he would make involved the reinterpretation and reordering of many of the old ways. This he could only do after he was Absolute. Soon his dreams would come true. He would be known as Joakal the Just, Joakal the Lawgiver.

  And there was Elana, his beautiful, beloved Elana. She had been gone this past month, spending time in her childhood home while she decided whether to marry him or enter Service at the temple, but she promised to return on the day of his coronation with her answer.

  She will marry me, Joakal thought. She must. Joakal loved her too deeply to consider any other answer. It was with her alone that Joakal had shared all of his many plans and dreams. She was the only one on this world who knew what action he had already taken to make the first of those dreams come true. She would stand by his side when he made the proclamation. She would rule by his side, and together they would guide this world into a new and golden age.

  The young King turned to his companion. “Have you heard anything from the Federation ship?” he asked. “Are you certain they’ll arrive on time?”

  “We have received no word from the ship,” Aklier answered. “You would have been told, but I am certain they will arrive on schedule.”

  “Think of it, Aklier,” Joakal said, his eyes shining with his unspoken dreams. “Think of what it will mean for our people. The stars will be open to us and all the people on all the worlds of the Federation will be our brothers. We will learn of their ways, and we will teach them ours.”