A Wayward Woman

by Helen Dickson

  She stared at him in shock. ‘Five hundred. That is a fortune. I cannot take so much.’

  ‘You would not offend His Majesty by refusing his gift?’

  ‘Oh … no …’ Marietta looked anxious. ‘Do you think I should accept such a gift? I have jewels I could sell.’

  ‘You must keep them for the future, Marietta. Accept what has been given you. I am sure there must be things you would like to order? We could visit the merchants this afternoon, and anything you purchase can be sent on with goods I have ordered myself.’

  Her cheeks were faintly flushed, her look oddly shy, making her, had she known it, more beautiful than ever.

  ‘I do not think I thanked you adequately for the gowns you provided for my use. If I may keep them I need little more for the moment—though I would like a lyre. Mine was destroyed, and it is my pleasure to play and sing when I am alone.’

  ‘Then we shall purchase a fine instrument, and anything else you see that takes your fancy. The few gowns I had prepared for you are a mere trifle.’ Anton smiled oddly. ‘Please do not refuse my poor gift.’

  ‘They are beautiful. I could not have chosen better myself. If you will wait while I put on my cloak, I shall be ready in a few minutes.’

  ‘Wear a fur muffler to keep your throat warm. I believe you will find one amongst your things. I do not wish you to catch a chill.’

  ‘No, for then we should be forced to stay in town longer.’ Marietta smiled at him. ‘Excuse me, sir. I shall not keep you long.’

  Her heart felt lighter as she ran up the stairs to her bedchamber. It was years since Marietta had been taken to visit the shops of merchants; her husband had always ordered anything she needed and had it delivered to the castle. To be able to choose what she wanted was a rare treat and she felt a little thrill of excitement.

  She might buy some silk for embroidery, for then she need not sit idle, and material to make clothes for her son, combs for her hair, silver trinkets that would replace the others she had left behind—and of course a lyre. All of a sudden she could think of so many things she needed.

  ‘You must be weary of shopping,’ Marietta said when they returned to the house late that afternoon.

  They were both carrying some parcels, though the bulk of what she had ordered would be sent on a wagon with goods Anton had ordered for himself and his family. He had taken her to all the best merchants in Spitalfields and Cheapside, encouraging her to spend recklessly. At first she had been afraid that she might spend more than she had, but Anton had laughed and said he would advise her if she became too reckless. He had said nothing more, merely watching her pleasure with a look of indulgence that made her feel almost shy.

  ‘It was so generous of you to give up your time, for I think you must have more important matters. The Comte always ordered my things and had them sent to the castle.’

  ‘Is it not more amusing to choose what you want?’ Anton asked, arching his brows. ‘You could not decide between the colours you admired easily, so how could anyone else know which you preferred?’

  ‘I was pleased to have new gowns. I did not mind that my husband chose for me—though my father always let me choose before I was married.’

  ‘Your father was a nobleman?’

  ‘Baron Villiers. He was not a rich man, and lost much of what he had in unlucky investments, I believe. It was fortunate that Comte de Montcrief offered for me, or my father might have lost all.’

  ‘So it was a marriage of convenience?’

  ‘My father thought it a good one.’ Marietta dropped her eyes. ‘I believe I was fortunate.’

  ‘The Comte treated you well?’

  ‘He was kind to me.’

  Anton nodded, looking at her thoughtfully. ‘Marietta Villiers. I have sometimes wondered if we met before that day I won the silver arrow?’

  ‘Yes, we did. I remembered you even then, because you saved my life, though you had forgotten me …’ Marietta’s eyes challenged him. ‘It was some years ago. The day two kings met on the.’

  ‘Field of the Cloth of Gold.’ Acceptance dawned in his eyes. ‘How could I have forgotten? I knew that I had seen you before, but the memory eluded me. I thought once you might be that girl, but so much had happened in the years between, and you have changed, Marietta.’

  ‘I am older, and my waist is a little larger.’ she said ruefully. ‘You should not remind a lady of her age, sir. It is not gallant.’

  ‘I meant no disrespect. You were a pretty girl then, but you have become a woman—a very beautiful, desirable woman.’

  Something in Anton’s eyes at that moment made her heart leap. She felt heat pool inside her, and desire trickled through her veins like molten lead. Her lips parted on a sigh. She longed for him to give her some sign that he felt the same way … to take her in his arms and kiss her. If he truly cared for her she would be so happy to be his wife!

  ‘I … thank you,’ she said a little shyly. It was on the tip of her tongue to say that she would wed him, but the words would not come.

  ‘Marietta—’ Anton began, but broke off as he heard footsteps and Miguel entered the hall. ‘You should go up now, lady. We have a long journey, and I do not wish to waste time in the morning. You should see that the servants have packed all you need.’

  His words were a curt dismissal that made Marietta turn away. How could he go from gallant lover to the reserved man she hardly knew so suddenly? She met Miguel’s cold stare and wondered what was in his mind. He had told her that he was glad the King had pardoned her, but she was not certain he meant it.

  ‘Yes, I would not wish to keep you waiting,’ she said to Anton. ‘Excuse me, gentlemen. I shall dine in my room this evening, for I wish an early night. I am tired and I would rest.’

  Marietta found that she slept better than she had expected that night. In the morning she woke refreshed and ready for the journey. When she went down to the courtyard she discovered that Anton’s men were assembled, also some ten others that she did not know who all wore the King’s livery. His Majesty had sent the escort he promised.

  Anton was engaged in conversation with the captain of the royal guard, and did not see her as she approached her palfrey. Instead, Miguel came up to her. She was reluctant, but could see nothing for it but to accept his help. He stood for a moment looking at her, his expression telling her that he was angry, and resentful about something.

  ‘You have been fortunate, lady. Do not imagine that Anton’s attentions mean more than mere courtesy. He has no love for such as you. His wife was a beautiful angel and his heart lies in her grave—where he put her.’

  The words were spoken in hushed tones that only she could hear, but in a way that sent shivers down her spine.

  ‘I do not understand you.’

  ‘He mourns her because he killed her. He may use you as a whore, but he can never love another woman. His sin will haunt him for his whole life, as he deserves. Be warned for your own sake.’

  Marietta shuddered as he took her and threw her into the saddle none too gently. For a moment she looked down at him. Miguel’s intense look sent shudders through her. She had thought previously that he disliked her, but he had never spoken out like this—did he hate her or was he jealous?

  Could he be jealous of Anton? Surely not? She had always thought they were the best of friends, and she was sure that Anton trusted him.

  Why had he said such things to her? Marietta did not truly understand what lay beneath the warning. Was he warning her against Anton? He had claimed that Anton had killed his wife … almost accusing him of murder.

  There was some mystery here. She sensed that there were things she could not know … things hidden in the past that cast a long shadow and would affect the future.

  Anton was mounting himself. He glanced at Marietta and nodded his head, then turned and smiled at Miguel. The friendship between them was plain to see. For a moment Marietta had thought she should speak to Anton, tell him what Miguel had said to her, but his
smile made her change her mind. He would not believe her. He would think she had made it up.

  Marietta thought she understood Miguel’s outburst. His manner had always puzzled her, but now she thought she had solved the puzzle. He wanted her himself, and because she had shown her preference for Anton he had tried to turn her against him.

  She could not tell Anton because he would think she was being spiteful. Besides, she did not wish to cause trouble between them. If she decided to accept Anton’s offer of marriage, Miguel would have to accept it or return to Spain.

  They had been riding for the best part of the day before Anton finally called a halt. He had chosen to stay at a different inn from the one they had used as they journeyed to London.

  ‘I am trying to stay away from the high roads,’ he told her as he came to help her dismount. ‘If we were followed to London our enemy may be waiting for us to return the same way. At the moment we are too many for Rouen to risk falling on us in open countryside, but in woods the advantage might lie with him.’

  Marietta looked at him anxiously. ‘Do you think he will try to snatch me again?’

  ‘I think he might kill you this time.’ Anton’s expression was grave. ‘If you were dead he might try to claim guardianship of your son. He does have a claim, for he is Charles’s halfbrother.’

  ‘He would kill him!’ Marietta’s eyes opened wider as she stared at him in horror.

  ‘If the claim was made Henry would take the boy as his ward. He has told me that I would be appointed Charles’s guardian until he came of age.’

  ‘So the Bastard must kill us both …’

  ‘I am sure he would wish to be avenged on me for more than one reason,’ Anton told her. ‘I know that the reckoning must come, but I want it to come on my terms. Once you and the child are safe with my uncle I shall seek him out and settle this thing.’

  ‘You will risk your life again for my sake?’ Marietta felt her throat tighten. ‘I … do not wish you to die in my stead.’

  Anton laughed softly. ‘Have you not forgotten I bested him once before, lady? This time I shall kill him.’

  ‘Can it not be settled some other way? I would not be the cause of any man’s death—and I do not want you to risk your life.’

  ‘You should not concern yourself, Marietta. These things are best left to men.’

  ‘Yes, perhaps …’ She sighed. ‘I am tired and my mind sees too many terrors.’

  ‘You need to rest. I sent ahead to secure rooms for us at the inn. Go to yours and lock your door. Open it only to someone you know, or the host’s wife. I think it would be best if you supped alone again.’

  ‘Yes, perhaps you are right.’

  Marietta felt tired after so much travelling. She wanted to see her son again, to feel safe and relaxed in Lady Claire’s home. Perhaps then she would be able to think clearly about the future.

  Marietta turned her head as Anton brought his horse alongside hers the next day. She had hardly spoken to him since they had left the inn that morning, but she knew that he had to be alert to all the dangers they might face on the journey, and did not expect to be noticed. He had more important matters on his mind.

  ‘We shall spend one more night on the road,’ he told her. ‘Tomorrow at dusk we should reach my uncle’s house if we continue to make good time.’

  ‘I shall be glad of it. I must confess that I begin to feel weary.’

  ‘It is not to be wondered at,’ Anton said, looking at her in concern. ‘We have been constantly on the road since we returned to England. But I thought you would wish to be with your son as soon as it could be achieved.’ He lifted his brows in enquiry.

  ‘Yes, I long to see him. Thank you.’ She met his searching gaze. ‘Last evening, if I seemed to question your judgement … please forgive me.’

  ‘It is forgiven. You know little of me, Marietta. I took you to London, where you might have met your death, and I have sometimes been harsh with you. How should you know what kind of man I am?’

  ‘You have saved my life and pledged to help my son. Believe me, I trust you no matter what.’

  ‘You have heard something ill of me?’ Anton’s eyes darkened. ‘I believe I may guess. Please accept my word that I regret sincerely what happened. If I could bring Isabella back to life—’ He broke off as one of his men shouted to him. ‘Excuse me. I must see what is going on; there may be a trap up ahead …’

  Marietta watched him as he rode on with two of his men to investigate a small commotion. The rest of the party was told to halt, and she saw that the men had their hands on their sword-hilts lest this was a diversion to mask an attack on them. However, a shout that all was clear started the train of men moving again, and as Marietta came up to the little cluster of wagons and horses in the clearing ahead she saw that they were travelling players.

  She greeted Anton with a smile as he rode back to her. ‘Is all well, sir?’

  ‘They are a band of travelling players, Marietta. I have asked them to join with us. When we stop for the night they will perform one of their miracle plays for us.’

  ‘A play?’ Marietta’s laughed. ‘It is a long time since I saw a play. Sometimes the players and mummers came to my father’s house, but at the castle we had our own troubadours who played and sang for us. The Comte did not encourage bands of players for he thought them vagabonds.’

  ‘Some undoubtedly are, but others are honest entertainers. You will enjoy the performance, and so will my men,’ Anton said, looking more cheerful than he had when he’d left her. ‘We are almost at the inn, Marietta, and then tomorrow we shall reach our journey’s end.’

  And then she must give him her answer, as she had promised. The only trouble was that she was still not sure he wanted her for herself and not just as a mother for his daughter.

  Marietta joined some other ladies who had assembled in the inn yard to watch the players set up their scenery. Torches blazed in every corner of the yard, concentrated around the stage so that everyone could see the actors. A mood of excitement had descended, because it was not often that such a treat was offered.

  Anton had set some of his men to patrol the yard so that others might watch in safety, but still the feeling was relaxed. Marietta had begun to hope that perhaps Rouen had stayed in France. Perhaps he had decided to be satisfied with what he had—though she knew that the revenues he could extract from the peasants would not long pay for his extravagances. The Bastard must get his hands on her husband’s gold, or he would have to find some way of earning more for himself.

  The entertainment opened with a display of tumbling, juggling and fire-eating, which brought some gasps from the watchers. Then the play began. It was the story of the adoration, telling of how the three kings and the shepherds heard the news of Christ’s birth and came to worship him in a stable.

  ‘Only one more night and then you will be safely with your cousin.’

  Anton’s voice made Marietta turn to him. His face was in the shadows and she could not read his expression.

  ‘Shall you be glad, Marietta?’

  ‘I shall be glad to rest for a while,’ she said, ‘and to hold my son in my arms. I have missed him, and I am anxious that he has fretted for me, even though I know he has been well cared for. I have always nursed him myself. Even when my milk dried I spent hours holding him and singing to him each day.’

  ‘You are a loving mother—and will, I think, make a good wife to some fortunate man.’ A wistful expression was in his eyes. ‘I think of my daughter often.’

  ‘You must be missing your daughter. You have left her too long for my sake.’

  ‘She is safe with my mother, but I shall send for her as soon as we reach my uncle’s. I intend to stay for a while, and I want you to meet Madeline as soon as possible.’

  ‘Yes, I should like to meet her. I should enjoy seeing you together. You are so good with Charles. I think you are a good father.’

  ‘You are a generous and loving woman. My daughter would be fortu
nate to have you as her mother—and I to have you as my wife.’

  ‘Anton …’ Her lips parted on a soft breath of need. ‘I have been thinking.’

  ‘You need not answer yet. Wait until you are with Claire and your son. Tell me your answer then.’ He smiled. ‘Look, the play reaches its end. Come and meet the players and tell them you enjoyed their work.’

  ‘Yes …’ Marietta smiled up at him. When he behaved like this she was certain of her answer. Indeed, she felt foolish to have doubted, for he had shown her that he was an honourable man in so many ways.

  She turned her head, feeling that she was being watched. A man was standing in the shadows, staring at them. Was it Miguel? Had she been right to think he was jealous? Or was she letting her imagination run away with her?

  For a moment she was tempted to tell Anton that she was disturbed by something Miguel had said to her at the start of their journey, and yet she did not want to spoil this evening. She felt happier than she had for years. There would be time to tell him another day. After all, Miguel was unlikely to do anything to harm his friend or her because of a little jealousy.

  Marietta lay sleepless for a while after she retired. She could still hear noises from the inn yard, people laughing and talking. Some of them had drunk too well of their host’s good ale and were celebrating noisily.

  She had almost made up her mind to accept Anton’s offer of marriage. Perhaps he did not love her as she loved him, but he felt passion for her. She recalled the tender way Anton had loved her that night, the exquisite feeling that had taken her to the heights of pleasure. The touch of his hand on her cheek in the yard had sent shivers running through her, making her ache with the need to lie in his arms once more.